People can't eat people alive, and frozen men don't exist. Bella's secret knowledge of vampires is inadvertently brought to surface when she & her friends are all thrown in the path of fate.

Here it is, my new Jasper/Bella story. I hope you enjoy it as much as you did my first one. I can tell you now that I'm having a rip-roaring good time writing this.

Warning: If you are offended by swearing, sex, or inappropriate behavior, it's best that you do not read this story.

This story is AU/OOC.

All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer. No copyright infringement intended.

Mature readers 18+ only please.

Lauren's POV

I was bored out of my skull, sitting in our house doing nothing. The fall semester at the University of Washington was due to begin in a week and a half. My roommates were all out working at their jobs. I had the day off today. It was pouring rain outside, not at all conducive to any sort of outdoor activities—not that I participated in any. The point is, the weather sucked shit and I really didn't feel like doing anything except for vegging out at home.

I thought about my three roommates. I loved those bitches, I really did—each and every one of them. There was Jess, she's been my friend since kindergarten. She and I have always been tight. There was also Angela. Angela and I were only acquaintances until our senior year of high school. Now, she was one of my tightest buddies and I'd never let her get hurt again. The last of our pack was Bella. She came to Forks during our junior year and I was instantly jealous of her. I mean, she just showed up from Arizona one day and all of the guys at school worshipped the ground she walked on instantly. It wasn't until our senior year that we all became friends. Now we were inseperable.

Senior year at Forks High. It was the worst year of our lives, and the best. I had thought I was in a good place when it started. I was dating Tyler Crowley and I was deliriously in love, or so I thought I was. My grades weren't bad either, I was pulling straight B's and C's which was a first for me.

My best friend Jess was in a similar situation. She and Mike Newton were going strong. You couldn't pry the two of them apart with the jaws of life. She, Mike, Tyler, and I would frequently go out on double dates and we'd have the time of our lives.

Angela was also in a great place. She was dating Ben Cheney, and she had even given her virginity up to him. That was a huge step for a minister's daughter.

Then there was Bella Swan, she was dating the gorgeous, wealthy, and elusive Edward Cullen. We all fawned over him. Her dating him was a huge reason that I was jealous of Bella in the first place. All that came to an end when I found out what kind of a prick the guy really was.

As I was saying, senior year was going great in our minds. Then, on the evening of September 16th, things started falling apart. I think it was around ten pm when my mother suddenly donned her jacket and equipped herself with a flashlight.

"Stay in the house, Lauren. I'm going to go and help with the search party. Bella Swan is missing," my mom told me.

"Missing?" I asked, not that I cared at the time. For all I knew, she could have gotten mauled by a bear, I didn't give a shit.

"Yes, missing. The community phone chain was just activated, apparently, the girl went for a walk in the woods with her boyfriend right after school and she hasn't been seen or heard from since."

"Wow, I hope they find her," I lied.

"Me too, honey. If it were you that were missing, I'd tear the entire forest apart until they found you."

Okay, now I felt bad for my lie.

"Good luck," I stated, as she went out the door. My mother and father got divorced when I was a baby. For as long as I could remember, it was only just me and her.

A minute later, Jess called me. "Did you hear the news about Bella Swan? My parents are out searching the woods for her right now. I wonder what happened?"

"No idea," I said.

"Yeah, well, my mom said that the Cullens suddenly left town too. Their house is completely boarded shut. Do you think Edward Cullen murdered her?"

"Oh my God! Maybe that's what happened. I'm so glad that I didn't date him, Jess."

"Lauren, you didn't even have a chance with him. The guy didn't even give you a passing glance."

"And it's a good thing, too, because I would have been the one lying dead in the forest. God rest her soul."

"You're so right. We should say a prayer for her."

"Yeah," I agreed.

I had no idea what time my mother came home because I was already sleeping by then. In the morning, my mother told me that she was found in the woods by one of the men from the Quileute Reservation at around three in the morning. She was apparently catatonic and had hypothermia, and had to be hospitalized. The news was that her boyfriend had broken up with her in the woods and just left her there.

"I'm telling you something, Lauren. If I ever see that Edward Cullen again, I'll be saying a few words to him about manners, then I'll be breaking his nose. What kind of a boy breaks up with a girl in the middle of the woods and just abandons her there? What a horrible boy! I'm so happy that you never got involved with him!" my mother seethed in anger.

When I got to school, Bella Swan was the topic of the day. Edward Cullen had become the evil villain of Forks High, and rightfully so. I may not have liked Bella, but no one deserved to be broken up with and abandoned in the woods. Fucking bastard!

At lunch, I sat with Tyler, Mike, Jess, Angela, and Ben. Angela was completely upset about what happened to Bella. She and her were good friends.

"I'm going to go and visit her at the hospital after school today," Angela said.

"I'll come with you," I offered. I had no idea what made me say that.

"Really?" Angela looked shocked. It was no secret that Bella wasn't my favorite person.

"I'll come, too," Jess said. "She shouldn't be alone at a time like this. I know that if Mike broke up with me, I'd be devastated."

"I'll never break up with you, babe," Mike said. Liar, liar, pants on fire.

"I know." Jess was so gullible back then, she believed him so easily. We were all deluded when we were in high school.

When school ended that day, Angela, Jess, and I made our way to the hospital to visit Bella. She looked like hell. We all made polite conversation with her, but she wouldn't talk. I had a short fuse, correction, I still have a short fuse. Anyway, I became quickly annoyed at how she looked dead to the world.

"You know something, Bella. I came here today because I felt sorry for you, but I don't anymore. You haven't said a thing to us. Sure, that prick, Edward Cullen, broke up with you, and he did it in a bad way, too. No decent guy would abandon someone he cared about in the woods. There are like wolves, bears, skunks, and shit out there. You could have been sprayed by a skunk and your hair would have stunk for months! Not to mention the fucking mosquitos! You could have been bitten and been all itchy. The point is, the asshat broke up with you in a callous way. Now, do you really want to waste any more time moping about the fucker, or are you going to start talking, and enjoying your life?"

Jess and Angela's eyes widened in shock as I handed Bella her ass to her. What Bella did next stunned us all. She started laughing. Laughing. In fact, she was laughing so hard that the rest of us started laughing. The nurse came rushing inside because of the ruckus we were making, telling us to keep the noise down.

After she left, Bella finally spoke, "You know something, you're right. The guy is an asshat! What a fucking freak! You know what else? Because of him, I'm still a virgin! An eighteen year old virgin! He kept rejecting me because he wanted to keep me pure until marriage. He never took my opinions into consideration and, come to think of it, I don't even think he ever heard a word I said. Oh my God! I think he got off on getting me all worked up, and then letting me down. I wasted so much time on him." She started crying her eyes out.

I pulled Bella into my arms and told her that those would be the last tears she ever shed over Edward Prude Prick Pussy Cullen. She thanked me for my brutal honesty. Jess, Angela, and I visited her in the hospital everyday after school and when she finally returned to school the following Monday, the four of us were best friends.

Two weeks later, it was my turn to get shafted. I caught Tyler cheating on me with some bitch on the cheerleading squad. Bella actually went up to Tyler during football practice and chewed his ass out in front of the entire football team and cheerleading squad. She called him a cheating scoundrel and a man-whore, and called the bitch in question a slut of the worst kind for stealing someone else's man. Angela predicted that she would be knocked up within a month. Sure enough, on graduation day, that cheerleader walked up to retrieve her diploma, seven months pregnant and as big as a house. My best friends let me sulk for exactly two days, then showed up at my house with sleeping bags, nail polish, and smuggled alcohol from their parents' liquor cabinet. Angela even brought cigarettes that her mother had stashed away from her father. We partied like the innocent girls that we were, then spent the entire night puking in the toilet because we couldn't handle our liquor. We've worked on that throughout the years.

About a month after that, Bella was coming out of the bathroom when Mike Newton actually had the nerve to ask her out. Jess, Angela, and I were just on the other side of the door and heard the whole conversation. I can recall it to this day.

"Hey, Bella, how's it going?" Mike asked.

"Good, thanks."

"That's great. Really, it is. I was wondering what you're doing on Friday night?"

"Why?"

"Well, I thought that maybe you and I can go catch a movie or something. You know, just the two of us."

"Like a date?"

"Yeah, exactly."

Jess was freaking out behind the bathroom door at this point.

It was Bella's response that was awesome. "Why you fucking son-of-a-bitch! How dare you! How dare you ask me out on a date! You're dating one of my best friends and you have the nerve to ask me out? I oughta string you up by the balls like a pinata and beat you with a fucking baseball bat!"

"Uh, so, I take it that's a no, then."

"Of course it's a no, you little shit!"

"Well, um, it'd be cool if you don't mention this to Jess."

"I'm not that cool of a person, you bastard!"

Jess, Angela, and I opened the door and filed out of the ladies room just then. We flanked Bella and stared down Mike. The turd brain didn't even have the decency to break up with Jessica. He just avoided her for the rest of the year. Bella, being the awesome friend that she was, gave her two week notice to Mrs. Newton. She worked at Fork's Outfitters with the rest of us after that. The three of us let Jess brood until the weekend. We showed up on Saturday morning, loaded her up into Angela's car and drove to Seattle for the day. We toured the University of Washington and even snuck into a frat party. We decided that we would apply for college there solely based on the party scene. I had no doubt that I would get in. Angela, Bella, and Jess were really smart and they forced me to keep up with my school work no matter how much I bitched. I was actually pulling A's and B's.

So, three of us were single, and things were still going strong and steady between Angela and Ben. That all came to an end in April when we started receiving our college acceptance letters. Ben got accepted to Stanford University in Palo Alto, California. Angela didn't, but was accepted to several other colleges, only none that were close to Palo Alto. Ben asked Angela to come to California with him instead of attending any of the colleges that she was accepted to.

"Why should I?" she asked him.

"You really should see if you can get into better schools, Angela."

"Um, I got into several great schools, Ben. And there's nothing wrong with the University of Washington."

"Yeah, well, considering that I got into a much better school than you did, I think you should move out to California with me and support my educational endeavors."

"And what about my educational endeavors, Ben?"

"You can always go to a community college in the area. It's not like the schools that you got into are a big deal."

Bella's, Jessica's, and my jaws dropped at the same time. We were stunned that he could make such an arrogant and elitist statement.

"Would you girls excuse us?" Angela asked.

The three of us got up from the lunch table and moved a couple of tables over to give them some privacy, but not enough so that they were out of earshot. By the end of lunch, Angela had dropped Ben like a ton of bricks. She wasn't putting up with his over-inflated ego. Ben apologized and begged her to get back together with him, but she stood strong and tall and told him that, now that he had shown his true colors, there was no way that she could ever be his girlfriend again.

Rather than sulking, Angela became angry. She had been playing the role of the good minister's daughter throughout her life and she was sick of it. Her final straw was when her parents actually sided with Ben because, according to them, he would be going to Stanford University and had an extremely promising future. Angela couldn't believe how much faith her parents didn't have in her. She realized then, that for her entire life, her parents had been telling her that she should marry a minister's son or a doctor and be a good, supportive wife. They never had any faith in her to forge her own career. As it was, Angela had a full ride to the University of Washington. So did Bella, for that matter. Angela moved out of her parents house and into my house that day. She came over sobbing that her father had hit her. She had welts and bruises on her face to prove it. When my mom saw the welts on Angela's cheek, she called Charlie Swan immediately and he rushed over to my house. Now, I've known Charlie Swan my entire life, but I had never, ever seen him as angry as he was that day. He took a statement from Angela and some pictures. He asked her if she had any relatives in the area that she could stay with. She said that she didn't. Since she was already eighteen, my mom suggested that she move in with us. My mom has always been extremely supportive and she genuinely liked Angela, so she welcomed her with open arms.

Next, Charlie asked her if she wanted to press charges against her father, she said that she did not so he escorted Angela back to her parents house to retrieve her belongings. Angela told us that Charlie threatened Reverend Weber to within an inch of his life and told him that if he ever approached her again, he would make sure that he was locked up for the rest of his life. Angela still hasn't talked to her parents to this day, they've written her off as a sinner, and they avoid my mother and Charlie like the plague.

Five weeks later, the four of us showed up at the senior prom, dressed to the nines, without dates. We had a total blast. Our prom picture was of the four of us together smiling at the camera in complete bliss. We had no men, but we didn't care. We were just happy and sure of ourselves and that's how it's been ever since then. In the last three years, we've seen each other through every heartache and supported each other through every achievement. We've been there for each other for everything. Even when, last year, Bella and I got the shock of our lives, when her dad and my mom up and eloped in Reno. We had no idea that the two were even dating. Not that we minded, but damn, they could have warned us.

We were due to begin our senior year at the University of Washington. The four of us were renting a house near the campus. We all had part-time jobs during the school year and worked full-time during the summers. Bella worked at Barnes and Noble, Angela worked at Target, Jessica worked at McDonald's, and I was a waitress at The Cheesecake Factory. My mom and Bella's dad, and Jessica's parents, all contributed to our rent and Jess and I got our college tuitions paid for. Angela and Bella both had academic scholarships.

I peeked at the clock. It was already four o'clock and I hadn't done a thing. It was Wednesday so it was my turn to cook. What the fuck was I going to make for dinner? I wasn't an expert chef like Bella was so they never expected much. I swear, that girl has a gift. We were all assured of having at least two good dinners a week with her cooking. I only had to cook one night a week because my brutally honest roommates told me that I sucked the big wienie when it came to cooking. I was okay with that, I was woman enough to admit that I needed a personal chef. Too bad we have to eat to survive.

I looked through the cupboard and found two boxes of Hamburger Helper. Yep, that's what we're having. I can manage that. I know for a fact that we have ground beef, too. I'd better get to cooking before they all get home. God, I hope they don't expect me to cook a vegetable with this meal.

I was listening to the radio and was about to turn the burner off when I heard the DJ announce, "Alright it's time for the Radio KPTY Wild Labor Day Weekend in Vegas contest. You and three friends will be flown to Las Vegas, stay in a penthouse suite at the Hard Rock Hotel for three nights, given exclusive use of a party limo all weekend, have free passes to all the hot venues in Vegas, including the REHAB pool party, plus you'll receive ten thousand dollars in spending cash. Participants must be age twenty-one or older. The first caller with the correct answer to this question wins: What town in Washington is under a near-constant cover of clouds and boasts over two hundred eleven days of rainfall, on average, per year? If you know the answer call 206-123-KPTY. Good luck!"

"Aaaagggghhhh!" Phone, phone, phone, motherfucker, where's my fucking cell? Shit, shit, shit. Keep it together, Lauren. Fucking keep it together. Oh my God! It's a busy signal. Damn it. Keep trying. You never know. Oh my fuck. Oh my Lord.

I mentally said a prayer, "Dear Jesus, I know I haven't exactly been perfect, and I know that I'm a lush, and I may have had a few one night stands, but please, please...I really need to win this. My friends and I need to get wild and let loose for one weekend in Las Vegas. I've never really asked you for anything so please do this for me, for us. You know what, do it for Angela. She spent eighteen years of her life, faithfully attending church, and praying to you, only to be shafted by one of your supposed messengers. You owe her one, God damn it! Um, sorry for cursing."

I finally got a ring tone. The DJ picked up. "KPTY—Seattle's Party Station. Do you have an answer for me?"

"Forks! Forks, Washington in the Olympic Peninsula. Zip code 98331!" I screeched into the phone.

"What's your name, sweetheart?"

"Lauren, Lauren Mallory!"

"Lauren, are you at least twenty-one years old and do you have three friends that are also at least twenty-one?"

"Yes! Yes! Yes! Jessica Stanley, Angela Weber, and Bella Swan—they're my best bitches ever!"

"Well, Lauren, you and your friends meet the age qualifications and you guessed right. It is Forks, Washington!"

"Aaaagggghhhh! Oh my Goooooood! Aaaagggghhhh! Aaaagggghhhh! Aaaagggghhhh!"

"Calm down, Lauren. Let me get some information from you so we can send you and your friends off on your Wild Weekend in Vegas. Now tell me, what station hooks you up with the best party music and the best contests ever?"

"KPTY—Seattle's Party Station!" I hollered.

"Okay, hold the line."

A minute later, the DJ came back on the line and I gave him our information. I had to go and pick up our prize package between tonight and tomorrow. We were leaving on a noon flight on Friday. I hung up the phone, completely over the moon. The smoke detector started going off. Oh shit! The dinner!

Angela, Bella, and Jess walked into the house at that moment.

"Holy shit! The pan's on fire!" Jess shrieked. She got some baking soda out of the freezer, doused the flames, and turned the burner off.

"What the fuck happened?" Angela asked.

"Did you just burn Hamburger Helper, Lauren?" Jess asked.

"Yes, yes I did, but I have a really good excuse."

"You suck at cooking?" Bella asked, brightly.

"That too, but you're so not going to believe this chicas. I just won us a trip for four, for this weekend, to Las Vegas—all expenses paid from KPTY."

"Aaaagggghhhh!" they all shrieked, and ran to hug me. The four of us were jumping up and down in joy.

"How?" Bella questioned.

"All I had to do was call in and answer this question: What town in Washington is under a near-constant cover of clouds and boasts over two hundred eleven days of rainfall, on average, per year?"

"Forks!" they all hollered simultaneously.

"We just have to pick up the prize package tonight or tomorrow."

"Fuck it, dinner's obviously shot so let's go now!" Bella urged excitedly. "We can grab some pizza after we pick up the prize package." The three of them quickly changed out of their work uniforms and we were out of the door in a flash.

"Girls! We're going to tear Vegas apart this weekend!" I cried.

"Oh, yeah. Maybe we'll finally meet some decent guys," Jess said.

"Who gives a shit? As long as they're game for partying, I don't care. It's not like we're going to see them again after this weekend."

"You're right, Bella. It's party time!" Angela agreed.

Oh, yeah, we're going to take Las Vegas by storm! The city won't know what hit it.

Emmett's POV

Jasper, Carlisle, Pete, and I were hanging around the house watching TV. This is what our lives were reduced to. Four years ago, Jasper almost slipped and nearly took a bite out of Bella Swan at the birthday party that Alice forced onto her. She didn't blame him. In fact, that's what she told Carlisle while he was stitching her up. She knew that it was always a possibility, hanging out with vampires. After Edward dropped Bella off at home, the shit hit the fan.

Alice called a family meeting. We all sat at the dining table. Alice, Edward, Esme, and Rose faced Carlisle, Jasper, and me.

"It's time," Alice suddenly announced. Carlisle, Jasper, and I were clueless. The other four were...well, let's just say that those underhanded fuckers knew exactly what it was time for.

Edward spoke, then, "The incident that just happened was planned. We needed a way to get rid of Bella. I'll be formally breaking up with her on the Sixteenth of September."

"What the fuck do you mean by get rid of Bella? Edward, you love her," I said.

"No, I don't, and please refrain from using crass language in front of me."

"Fuck you!" Jasper and I shouted at the same time.

Edward became frustrated and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Alice," he sighed, and motioned for the midget to take over.

"I need everyone to remain calm," Alice said, then dropped the bombshell. "The four of us are leaving the family."

"What?" Carlisle shrieked.

"Each of us have found someone else. You knew that we weren't your mates, only your companions. Well, we've found our mates."

Okay, so we knew that this was always a possibility, but really? Did the unfeeling shits have to do this tonight?

"Yes, it's best we get this over with so the four of us can go to Denali," Edward said, reading my mind.

Fucking mind-invading asshole.

"As I said, we've found someone else, and we are leaving the family. It's no longer fair to the four of you for us to continue in this manner behind your backs." Alice looked pointedly at Jasper. "Jazzy—Edward and I are mates."

"Say what?"

"Edward and I are mates. We're in love and we can no longer keep our love to ourselves."

"Exactly how long has this been going on, Alice?"

"Since before Phoenix."

"Hang on a second. Are you saying that you and pretty boy here strung me and Bella along for four, possibly five months?"

"Yes," she gulped. Jasper must have sent Edward and Alice an immense amount of pain because both of them were writhing on the ground and shaking. A minute later, they both got up and sat back down in their chairs.

"Who's your mate, Rose?" I asked.

"Esme."

Carlisle's and my jaw dropped. We turned to each other with stunned looks on our faces.

"Well, hell, as long as Carlisle's not my mate, I'm golden. He's not my mate, is he?"

"No, I don't know who your mates are," Alice informed us. "I highly doubt the four of you have mates. You're just not on the same elevated plane of existence as we are."

"Okay, well, I'm free from the shackles of Madam Frosty Bitch now. Woohoo!" I shouted in joy.

"You know, Emmett. You could show a little more feeling about the fact that our marriage is coming to an end!" Rosalie humphed.

"Why the fuck should I? You were the one eating pussy for god knows how long, you frigid bitch. I got sick of your fucking ass years ago. Oh, and you suck in bed. All you do is lie there and expect to be serviced. Thank God I never kissed you while we were fucking, I wouldn't want Esme's twat invading my tastebuds."

I figured that I might as well let this shit all out now, since this was the last time I ever planned on encountering these freaks from hell. The first thing that I planned on doing was feeding from humans. Fuck animals, they all tasted funny.

"No, Emmett. Don't do it. Don't demean yourself and feed from humans. You're better than that, brother," Edward tried to preach.

"Oh, no, Eddie. You don't get to call me brother, and you certainly don't get to tell me whether or not I can feed from humans. It's my choice, not yours."

Carlisle was still stunned silent. He was unable to open his mouth at all. He truly loved Esme, but it was clear that she didn't love him. Jasper always told me that he felt that their relationship was one-sided and Esme was only using him for money.

"I've taken the liberty to have divorce papers drawn up. All you have to do is sign them. Everything is all set." Alice passed a set out to each of us.

I was about to sign the papers, and so was Carlisle, when Jasper yelled, "Stop!"

"Why, dude?" I asked.

"Because, you never, ever sign anything without reading it first, and the amount of deception that I felt radiating off of the three whores right now was off the charts."

"You don't trust me, Jasper?" Alice screeched.

"Nope, and you know what else, bitch? I want you to hand over my credit cards right the fuck now! NOW!"

Alice started shaking and emptied the contents of her purse onto the table. Jasper took away everything in her wallet, her checkbook, savings passbook, license, passport, everything except for the small amount of cash in her wallet.

"You two hoes do the same," Jasper growled at Rosalie and Esme. He was using his gift on them. Edward, the pussy, was too scared to step in. Jasper was sending all four of them a fuckton of fear. He rifled through the contents of their purses and took everything away from them, too. He, then turned to Edward and told him to hand over his wallet, and any and all documents with the name Cullen on it. Jasper had everything shredded between his fingers in seconds.

"You fuck us, we fuck you," he sneered, then called Jenks while sending a steady dose of fear to the four cheats.

"Jenks!"

"Yes, Mr. Jasper."

"You drew up three sets of divorce papers for Alice, didn't you?"

"Yes, Mr. Jasper."

"Mr. Carlisle, Mr. Emmett, and I aren't signing them."

"I understand, Mr. Jasper."

"You are no longer to forge any documents for Alice, Edward, Esme, and Rosalie using the names Whitlock, Cullen, or McCarty. Furthermore, they are to be billed directly for any services that you provide for them. Is that understood?"

"Yes, Mr. Jasper."

"If I find out anything otherwise, there'll be hell to pay. And I will find out. Are we on the same page?"

"Yes, Mr. Jasper."

"Good." Jasper hung up the phone.

"Jasper, how are we supposed to live? You've taken everything away from us. You owe me! I've given you over sixty years of my life!"

"And I've paid through the nose for it, too. Don't worry, you can take whatever assets you came into our marriage with, with you."

"But you know that Rose, Esme, and I have nothing!"

"Edward's a rich fellow. I'm sure he'll support you."

"But...but...what about the divorce?"

"Oh, well, I'll have my attorney draw up papers for Carlisle and Esme, and Emmett and Rose."

"What about us?"

"Sorry, sweetheart, Jasper Hale doesn't exist and neither does Alice Cullen. It makes things a lot easier, don't you think?"

Alice looked like a pint sized pit-bull with steam coming out of her ears. She started shrieking at the top of her lungs.

"Glad I don't have to deal with her manipulative, lying ass anymore," Jasper commented. Edward lunged to attack, but Jasper had him in pieces in seconds. "Don't fuck with me, little boy!"

"Jasper, who is your attorney? There's no attorney other than Jenks." Rose was clearly perturbed.

"Didn't I tell you? My buddy Pete passed the bar about five years ago. I know how much you all like him," he smirked. Oh smack! This shit was getting good. Fuck, maybe I should feel more remorse...nah, the ice queen is gonna be gone forever. That was reason to celebrate.

"Fuck, yeah!" I cheered, doing a few fist pumps in the air.

Alice started wailing upon hearing that. She knew that there would be no recourse. It was no secret that Pete hated her ass and he would do everything in his power to make life miserable for the four of them.

Carlisle finally regained some composure. "Take your shit and get the fuck out of my house! All of you! And if I find you've been using the Cullen name, I'll make sure that Peter Whitlock fucks your shit up! I'll have him send the divorce papers over to the house in Denali, you can keep that house. I don't want it."

"Right on, Carlisle!" I whooped, showing my complete support for his decision.

Within two hours, Edward was reassembled and the four of them were packed and out of the house. Carlisle, Jasper, and I left the next morning for Pete's house. It would have been too hard for us to explain the sudden disappearances of four of our family members to the townspeople.

When we arrived at Pete's sprawling ten bedroom estate in Arizona. He was expecting us. He had the divorce papers all prepped and ready for me and Carlisle. Rose and Esme were getting straight divorces with no division of assets. Carlisle signed over the deed to the house in Denali to the four of them. It was worth only about a hundred and twenty grand which was nothing for Carlisle. Pete also had new papers and identification ready for all of us with his address listed. I went back to using my real last name, McCarty, and Jasper went back to using Whitlock.

When Pete looked over the divorce papers that Alice had drawn up, it was incredibly skewed. Alice and Esme both wanted eighty percent of Jasper's and Carlisle's assets, while Rose wanted my boyhood home in Gaitlinburg, which was all I had. Carlisle and Jasper both wrote me checks for five million dollars each that day, stating that there was no way that they would make their brother go through eternity without cash. Pete said he'd build it up for me using his foresight, which I might add was a fuckton more accurate than Malice's visions.

The divorce papers were signed and returned within a week and we were released from the shackles of marriage. The only one that brooded was Carlisle, but not for long. Pete, Jasper, and I refused to let him sulk. We partied with him, went to football games, and had him act more like a twenty-three year old bachelor should. As a result, he was more relaxed and fun-loving than he'd ever been. We all were.

Peter Whitlock was an enigma. He was Jasper's friend from the time they served in Maria's army, Jasper considered him to be his brother. He's also the one that helped him escape. Until about ten years ago, he had a companion named Charlotte. She was cool as beans and she and her mate were frequent visitors at Pete's. Unlike us, she and Pete had an amicable break up. They had known they weren't mates and never got married. When the day came that she met her mate, she told Peter right away, before making a move on Garrett. When they broke up, Pete gave her ten million dollars without any hesitation at all. He wanted to do it because they had spent so many happy years together.

A couple of years after that, his gift told him that he would need to attend law school, so he did. He didn't know why, but he knew that it would be critical that he attended and that he would need to inform Jasper only. About a month before our wives broke up with us, Pete got another message that he'd need to draw up divorce papers for us so that's exactly what he did. It worked out well for us. We no longer have to go through Jenks for anything and he only does legal work and forgery for himself, the three of us, Charlotte, and Garrett.

Pete suddenly put his finger under his chin and donned a perplexed expression on his face. He nodded his head, shrugged his shoulders, then announced, "Guys, we're going to Vegas right now."

"Um, why?" I asked.

"Because shit's going down and we need to be there. I don't know what's going on, but it'll be good shit. Really good shit. I'm serious."

"Pete, was it your gift that told you we should go?" Carlisle inquired.

"Sure was."

"Okay, let's go then." Carlisle wasn't stupid. He wasn't going to doubt Peter's gift. None of us were.

We packed a few sets of clothes and hopped into Carlisle's SUV for the three hour drive to Las Vegas.

When we got into the Las Vegas city limits, Peter had Carlisle pull into a Bass Pro Shops.

"Wait here, I'll be right back," he told us.

A few minutes later, he came out carrying three cases of hand warmers. He passed a case to Carlisle, a case to me, and kept one for himself.

"We need to keep these in our pockets at all times. Keep refreshing them," he instructed.

"Hey, how come I don't get any?" Jasper asked.

"You won't need them." Peter grinned and wagged his eyebrows at Jasper.

We checked into a suite at the Hard Rock Hotel. I could smell the scent of sweet pussy everywhere and I was horny as all hell. We all were. Pete hadn't been laid in ten years, the rest of us in four.

"Hey, Carlisle."

"Hm?"

"Is it possible for a vampire to fuck a human?"

"Of course it is. The problem lies in the fact that you have to be extra gentle with them and you have to be careful not to be overcome by your bloodlust and feed from them upon your release."

"Have you ever fucked a human?"

"No, never."

"How about you, Jasper?"

"Not without killing them."

"Which brings me to the challenge that I have for the four of us," Pete announced devilishly. "This weekend our challenge is to find four willing human girls, fuck them, and leave them alive. Are you guys in?"

Was I? I had to really think about this one. I mean, what if I slipped?

So, what did you think? I'd love to hear your thoughts. As always, I promise to reply to your reviews. I can't wait to hear from you. XOXO