Her heart hurt. Clenching and unclenching, pressing against her rib cage and constraining her breath. Curling her fist in pain she brought it to her heart in an effort to keep it from exploding from her chest in agony. Crystal tears poured down her cheeks and darkened her clothes. An inhuman cry tore from her lips and echoed painfully throughout the woods she sat in. Sobs scratched at her abused throat and she finally released the tsunami of tears she had kept inside for so long. Sobbing and crying, screaming and wailing, she tried to manifest the pain inside into the tears outside. Looking around through filmy eyes, she couldn't recognize her surroundings. She didn't know where she was. All she could see were streaks of forest green and woody brown. The woods. She must have ran into the woods. Wrapping her arms around herself she forgot to care that she was lost and continued to cry. Alone. All alone.

Shining brightly, the sun glared down upon us and I laughed, soaking in the rays. "Rei-chan! It's so beautiful today, don't you think?" I asked, smiling.

Rei nodded in agreement and continued to stare out into the open. "Usagi, where do you think Chibiusa came from?" she asked thoughtfully.

My smile faltered, my eyes looked away quickly and I felt that pang in my chest that was becoming more and more frequent. "Chibiusa? Oh I don't know, why must we always talk about her? Let's go do something fun Rei-chan!" I tried to change the subject.

"Usagi! Stop being selfish! Obviously something is wrong with her, there are evil people trying to get her and you don't even care!" she cried hotly, eyes blazing with a familiar fire and her mouth curling downward.

I clasped my hands into my lap and stared intently at them, refusing to meet her gaze. "Rei-"I started, but was cut off quickly by two figures laughing happily not three feet away from us. Mamo-chan and Chibiusa were taking another walk today, and it seemed as though they were enjoying each other's company quite well. I frowned bitterly; he never smiled like that when he was around me. That stupid little bubble-gum haired girl clutched his hand tightly and swung it back and forth joyfully. Reaching downward to pick her up, my ex-boyfriend spun her in the air and plonked her on his shoulders, gripping her hands tight and walking away to the ice-cream shop. Sighing, I forced myself to look away, but not before Chibiusa caught my gaze and stuck out her tongue meanly. Triumph and satisfaction gleamed in her red eyes and I struggled to maintain my calm expression.

I needed to get out of there; I needed to be somewhere else. Getting up quickly, I plastered a fake smile on my face and waved. "I'll see you tomorrow Rei!" I said as cheerfully as I could, before starting up and walking back in the direction of my house.

Back in my small room, I lay face down on my bed and refused to move. Luna had come in a while ago, but left soon after when I didn't respond. I was thinking about just staying here, right on this bed until everything went away. Until all the youma went away, all the pain went away...until Chibiusa went away, I was wondering if I could get away with missing all that school when my door slammed open, a large crash resounding after it.

"Usagi-baka! Get up you lazy girl! It's a Sunday afternoon and Auntie said you have to take me to the grocery to buy oranges!" she cried out.

Balling my hands into fists I refused to move. Lazy am I? Fine then, I just won't move, serves her right. Waiting patiently, I endured all her screaming and whining, her shoving and pushing until she got bored and walked angrily out the door. I thought that was the end of it, but of course, she had to go and tattle on me and in walked my mother. "Usagi! I'm ashamed of you, you're poor little cousin can't go alone to the supermarket and she needs oranges for the dessert she's making tonight. At least she contributes to this family, unlike you, so get up and help her right now!" there it was again, that clenching feeling in my chest, like my heart was going to implode.

Forcing myself to stand, I walked lifelessly out the door, without waiting for Chibiusa and started walking to our destination. "Baka! Wait for me!" she yelled from behind, pink hair flying behind her as she ran to catch up to me.

Fifteen minutes later, we bumped into Ami-chan and Mako-chan, they hugged Chibiusa tightly and offered to take her grocery shopping instead, Makoto needed to go anyway, since she was short on rice and lettuce and Ami just wanted a break from studying. "Usagi-chan, are you going to come with us?" Makoto asked, smiling kindly.

Before I could answer, Chibiusa butt in, " No, Auntie had to force Usagi to come and she was being mean to me the whole way here and I don't want her to come!" she pouted pitifully.

"Usagi-chan, she's only a little girl, there's no need to be so hostile." Ami's soft voice brought me to life for a little bit, before I crashed down into the hole I dug myself once more.

Only a little girl? Ha. What did she know? What did any of them know? Did no one see how conniving she was? Or how manipulative and unkind she was? No, of course not, it's all in my head, she's just a sweet little angel. Even my own boyfriend likes her better than me. Without responding to any of them, I turned around and walked away, determined to not let it ruin my day. But it already had, I just couldn't bring myself to be happy. I couldn't smile. I couldn't laugh, I could only walk aimlessly, looking for something, and I didn't even know what. Walking like a spirit unfulfilled I was rudely interrupted by the blaring of my communicator watch. "Girls! Trouble down in park! A youma!" Mina-no, Sailor Venus' voice rang in my ears and I touched my transformation broach.

Even though I was falling into the unknown on the inside, I still had a job to do. I was still the protector of love and justice, Sailor Moon. " Moon Crystal Power Make-Up!" I yelled.

Feathers and ribbons surrounded me and I felt my clothes morphing into my sailor fuku. Ending in my signature pose I hurried to the park, where I found a youma grabbing onto the back of Chibiusa's shirt and clinging to her tightly. " Chibiusa!" Mars yelled, " Hold on!"

The monster cackled and I noticed a red glow starting to encircle her. She seemed to be made from the deepest fire, a red so dark and brilliant it almost seemed black and white at the same time. " If any one of you moves, I'll burn the little Rabbit to a crisp." Her fierce smile sent chills down my back.

The five of us froze, each wary of our opponent and unsure of what to do. In all honesty, we probably would have stood like that forever if it hadn't been for Tuxedo Kamen, who as usual, threw his stupid rose at the youma's wrist. Screaming in pain, it let go of the frightened girl and brought it's wrist to it's face. " You'll pay for that!"

Unfortunately, I was closest to Chibiusa and I had to go and grab the girl before the monster had time to take her again. Shivering in my arms, I looked down at her, she seemed to so fragile and vulnerable, she always needed protecting. So entranced was I, staring down at her, that I didn't realize that the youma was aiming at me until it was too late. " Sailor Moon! Protect Chibiusa!" my senshi cried simultaneously.

Snapping my head up, I stared in horror as a gigantic fireball soared through the air, aiming straight for me and Chibiusa. Thousands of thoughts flooded my mind all at once. I knew what was going to happen, or at least, what should happen. I was supposed to push Chibiusa aside and take the hit. Which would then leave me severely injured and burned and scarred for life probably. I knew that it would have to be one of us. There just wasn't enough time at this point to get both of us out of here.

But…but, I didn't want to. I didn't want to sacrifice myself for her. She didn't deserve it, she didn't! Why should I have to do this for her? Why me? Why did I always have to give myself up for her, a girl who turned everyone against me, a girl who constantly ruined my life, it wasn't fair!

Obviously, by the time I made my choice, it was already too late. The fireball was right in front of me now and I could already sense the heat burning my face and arms. Turning around, I was about to grab Chibiusa and push her away and try to follow after when I realized she wasn't even there. What the heck was going on? Twisting around, I saw her safe in the arms of Tuxedo Kamen, all the girls crowding around her…as I was left to the flames. Screaming I tried to toss myself out of the way but only half succeeded. Fire licked and tore at my back and legs, burning my flesh and charring my skin.

I swear to God I had never felt more pain in my entire life. All my nerves erupted and sent waves and waves of agony to her brain as I tried to move my arms to protect the Ginzuishou from harm. Collapsing on the ground I moaned in pleasure as the cool grass touched my blazing skin. Eyes focusing in and out I saw the senshi running toward me….and Tuxedo Kamen walking away, Chibiusa in his arms. After that, I snapped. Somehow, the Ginzuishou lit up on it's own and enveloped me in it's warm light, which, as weird as it sounds, felt cool as water on my skin. With the silver light, it brought a healing power all over my body, repairing the damages the fire had caused and making me whole again. Stunned faces greeted me and Rei tried to reach out for me, but I dodged her hand and ran away from them as fast as I could.

I didn't look back.

And they didn't come after me.

And so now, here I am. Crying in some unknown place. Bawling my eyes out. I just couldn't believe it, he picked her. They all picked her. Chibiusa held more room in their hearts than I did. And that hurt more than any fireball. Ever since that evil little thing came, everything became different. I hated that. I think I hated her too. But how? How could they have picked her from the flame's path and leave me there to burn? Was she that special? Was she that loved? What about me? I was their first friend! The first person who saw them for who they were and took the time to be their best friend. Where would Ami be without me? Studying her life away, always reading never laughing? Makoto would be all alone, feared and ostracized for her strength and size. Rei would always be seen as the weird shrine maiden with the pervert grandpa and Minako would never have a friend because ironically enough, they all thought she was a Sailor V wannabe. I was their first real friend and I brought them to. How could they leave me? How could they leave me, especially Rei. Rei was always my closest friend, like the sister I never had. And she left me.

And Mamo-chan!How could Mamo-chan leave me? My prince, my hero, my love, he betrayed me. And for what? Some snotty, brat of a child who fell from the sky? How could they? I kept seeing their faces as they talked with me and her, they never saw the pain I felt, they never knew that I hurt every time they put me down because of her, every time my mother chastised me because of her, every time I saw MY true love parading around with her like a dog on a leash. It wasn't fair! My heart broke every day and nobody cared! I can't always be happy, comic relief Usagi-chan all the time, I had a heart too, I had a pain filled heart too. I could hurt. I could cry.

I gave everything to protect this world, to protect my friends, my family and this is what I get? More tears leaked out my eyes. I wanted to curl up in a ball and die. How could they do this to me? I looked up and dried my eyes, the stars glistened in the dark sky and I revelled in the moon's rays. I felt the moonlight leak into my pores and a warm tingly feeling filled me up and banished all the sadness and pain. Serenity filled my heart and peace ruled my thoughts. I sighed and hugged myself tighter. I was calm now, but the hurt was still there, the pain of betrayal. My best friends…

" Usagi! Usagi! Please come back, where are you? Usagi!" Rei's voice echoed through the trees and I was surprised by the raw emotion screaming in her voice.

Like she actually cared. Rei's voice was followed by Minako's, " Usagi-chan! Please answer us! Usagi-chan!"

" Usagi-chan!" Ami called out, I felt bad for her, she would probably have to stay up late tonight to make up for the lost study time.

" Usagi-chan where are you?" Makoto cried.

I bent forwards in a ball and tried not to be seen. I didn't want to be found. What was the point? It wouldn't change anything, it'll still be the same. " Usagi please come back, please!" Rei kept yelling, her voice growing louder and louder.

" Rei-chan, she's not answering, maybe she's not here." Ami said logically.

I felt a pair of eyes boring into my back and I knew that I had been found out. I heard a sigh. " Fine, let's all go home, maybe she's in her bed and fell asleep. I'm just going to stay here for a bit, the moon is shining and it's very peaceful." Her light steps were coming this way and I heard theirs slowly moving outward, back to their homes.

" Usagi, get out of their right now. I can see you and you might as well see me too." Figuring I had nothing to lose, I unfurled myself and faced her. I think I shocked her quite a bit with my tear streaked face and dirt smudged arms. " Usagi." She whispered brokenly. She fumbled over her words before dropping to the ground like a stone and hurtling herself into my arms and for the first time in all the time I've known her, cried.

Hino Rei was actually crying. I couldn't believe it. Grabbing me, she pulled me roughly into her arms and hugged me so tightly it was almost hard to breathe. Clutching at me, she ran her fingers through my hair and suddenly, I was crying too. Rei's raven locks surrounded us like a cloak and I pushed myself deeper into her embrace. " Rei-chan." I mumbled.

" Usagi…Usagi…I-I, you baka!" she half sobbed, half laughed." You had me so worried do you know that? After the battle we checked your house, but you weren't there. We checked everywhere and it was getting dark and do you know how terrified I was? I could barely think straight. You were missing and no one had seen you. I was so worried. " emotion and sadness flooded her tone and I clung to her tighter.

" And when…and when I finally found you, I was so happy, you were safe and sound. But then I realized you were safe, but you were not okay. What happened today…that was not okay." She froze for a second, before continuing to knead my hair. Silence overtook us for a moment before I found the courage to speak. " Why are you here Rei? You chose Chibiusa, you left me. You left me so why are you back!" I cried.

I tried to break out of her grip, but she wouldn't let me go. " No! No, don't you see? I love you, I love you so much Usagi! You're my sister, my leader and my princess. How can I ever leave you? How can any of us leave you? You're so much more than a friend Usagi, you touched all of our hearts, became our closest friend. How can you say that? We love you." Rei's tears dripped down onto me and I felt our tears joining and crying together.

" Rei-chan, you hurt me. You hurt me so much. Chibiusa. Everyone always chooses Chibiusa over me, she's always more important than me. You all care more about her than me. You…you…you let me get hit by the attack and you saved Chibiusa. You didn't save me." I murmered.

" Usagi! Do you know that my heart stopped when I saw you in the way of the attack? I wanted to go and get you, I was going to push you out of the way, it didn't matter if I got hit, I'm supposed to protect you, but, but, I saw Tuxedo Kamen jumping to your rescue, we all thought he was going to save you. We wanted both of you to be safe, but by the time we realized that he hadn't taken you, it was too late. We wanted you to worry only about yourself and not about her, but you got hit anyway. I'm sorry Usagi. I'm so so sorry. It was never about you or her, we just wanted you both to be safe. And I know that she hurts you, that we all hurt you, but we don't try to. I'll try harder, I promise, just please Usagi, come back."

" I forgive you Rei. But I can't forget it, how can I forget it?" I sobbed.

" Usagi, Tuxedo Kamen chose the most capable from the two of you so that you could dodge without worrying about anybody but yourself. He was just too late in taking her. I promise you, it was never about who anyone liked better. But… if it was, you should know that I would choose you. I know it's horrible to say, but…"

" We're senshi, we're supposed to put our duty first." I said in a small voice.

" No! What is the use of our duty if you aren't there?"

" But you can't do that! She's only a little girl, we have to save everybody, I can't let you save me if it was at the cost of someone else." I cut myself off in realization.

" So you see silly Usagi? You would never have forgiven us if we had saved you. You have the Ginzuishou. You have the brightest power in the universe. What does Chibiusa have? We love you Usagi, and I know your break-up is hard and Chibiusa is difficult, but she looks up to Sailor Moon and I know that in the end Mamorou-san will get back to his senses."

I wasn't alright. It still hurt a bit. But, Rei dug me out of my hole and brought me back to my senses. If I stopped being self pitying, I could see the scared girl hiding behind Chibiusa's eyes. I saw the loneliness, the sadness, the fear. I saw it all and I understood. She was just a child and it was my duty as Sailor Moon and as Tsukino Usagi to help her. Pulling me up, Rei offered me a genuine smile and for the first time that day, I smiled back.

I couldn't stay inside myself and focus on all the negative things, I had to see the bigger picture and not give in to depression. Besides, I'm Usagi, the little bunny; I couldn't help but be happy.