INTRODUCTION:

Welcome to the Second Volume of my OmKimbus of Odd Possibilities, the place where I put a lot of the random stuff my brain spews out.

Wait, you say, why a second volume? After all, it's not like you're going to run out of digital pages, right? So why start a new one, you ask?

Well, as it turns out, there's this magic word 'complete' that affects how a lot of people search for titles on FFN, and after talking to a number of people who said they're far more inclined to start reading a long story if it's got that little 'c' next to it on the mobile version or the more complete 'complete' if you're on the main site. Given that the first OmKimbus was originally intended to go on forever, that would make those folks less and less likely to give it a chance as it got longer and longer, so I decided to try a quick experiment and added the word "Complete" to OmKimbus Prime when it reached 10 stories, just to see what would happen. Result: over a thousand hits within a few hours.

Sooooo, based on that not particularly scientific experiment, each volume of the OmKimbus will now run 10-ish chapters. And believe me, I've already got enough stuff to fill a few more of them with a little clean up work. Also, there were a couple of stories that in the first volume that were obviously the starts of longer tales that some folks have asked about seeing continued. I'm not adverse to that, but given my current backlog, the one thing that will influence that happening is if people review the chapter and say that specifically. That goes for the stories in OmKimbus Prime or anything else I post as well. I ain't psychic folks, and while story alerts are great, favs and especially reviews give me a lot more idea as to what you really want.

And all that said, here's the first story:

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ALL THAT GLITTERS

By SHADO Commander

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She could hear the sound of the party down the hall, now in full swing. In forty minutes the ball would fall on the TV and it would be another new year. Everyone would count down the last few seconds, cheer and then… well, they'd do what everyone with a date did on new years.

Not that Kim Possible would know.

The lanky redhead listened to the sounds of the party, then stared at her own empty eyes in the mirror. Maybe it was a stupid thing to be depressed over, but it bothered her. Of all the girls in her dorm, she was the only one who didn't have a date for the New Year's Eve party. No one had even asked.

No one ever asked.

With a grimace of pain, Kim pulled her burned and tattered shirt over her head, then kicked off the cargo pants she'd gone back to wearing and gave herself a long once over in the mirror. She wasn't vain, but she knew she had an attractive face. As for her body… well...

It wasn't a BAD body, she thought analytically. Fit, certainly. A bit boyish, maybe, if she was completely honest with herself, and the less said about her breasts (or lack thereof) the better. But she had nice hair, her stomach was flat, and her legs were…

Okay, they were a little on the muscular side, and the truth was, she had better biceps than most of the guys she knew. But the girls in the school's athletic programs seemed to have no trouble getting dates.

No, the problem was the bruises. Currently her ribcage was stained with a half-dozen yellow-purplish splotches and there were at least that many on her back, courtesy of her last go-round with Shego; a little tussle that had also given her the bruise on her chin and the still-healing split lip. At least she didn't have a black eye, like she'd had right before homecoming in High School, or the stitches along her jaw line that she'd had for the Junior Prom, but she was usually sporting a bandage or some other evidence of recent medical treatment. What guy with any degree of sanity would want to get involved with someone who looked like every part of her body had been pounded with a meat tenderizer?

Which, of course, essentially it had. A living green meat hammer who went by the name of Shego. They'd been going at it for nearly five years now, Kim constantly stepping up her game and Shego matching it. And in the process, Kim had saved the world six times in the last year. Had rescued more people than any three metropolitan fire departments put together. And what did she have to show for it?

Bruises, scars and an x-ray profile that made Evil Knieval look like a pantywaist.

And within a few days, Shego would have escaped from the 'maximum security' facility yet again, or Monkey Fist or Duff Killigan or one of a dozen other supervillain idiots would attack someplace with yet another super weapon and she'd be tossed in like a grenade. She'd get the job done. She ALWAYS got the job done.

But the truth was, secretly, she was scared. Not of the dangers. Not of the disasters. And certainly not Shego.

No, what scared her was the idea that this might be ALL her life would ever be. Would it really be enough for her?

Ron had already made his choice when he'd taken up Bueno Nacho's offer to send him to culinary school in preparation for becoming one of the chains executive chefs… unlike Middleton High, the prestigious Prestigieuse EcoleCulinaireDu PantalonDe Fantaisiee didn't allow students to run off in the middle of class, even if it was to save the world. They'd tried to keep their relationship going, of course, but given that she missed better than half of the meetings they were supposed to have, they had both seen the handwriting on the wall and agreed to 'just stay friends,' at least until they'd both finished school.

He'd found someone about a year later. Another culinary student, of course. Kim hadn't met her yet. She hadn't had the time. She never had the time. And on the rare occasions when she did… like now… who was even going to be interested in… well, someone like her? Someone who came with so little to offer to one person because they were too busy trying to help everyone. Someone who could never be sexy unless you were into women who looked like they had been beaten, which was so not the kind of person that Kim was looking for.

There must be an out. A way to dig herself out of this rut. Something that would challenge her physically while re-making herself… not just in the public eye, but in her own mind.

And then it hit her. Crossing to the huge stack of "to Be Answered" mail that had piled up over the last few days, she dug to the bottom and found the envelope she'd remembered.

This would be crazy, and she knew it… but if she took one semester off, she could JUST work it in, and there was no doubt that it had worked for others in a similar situation before.

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"Dad! Dad!" Jim screamed! "Something happened to Mom!"

"What?" James Possible raced into the living room to find Jim and Tim urgently fanning their mom as she lay groggily on the couch.

"Honey?" James spoke worriedly, pushing his sons aside as he took his wife's trembling hand. "What is it? What's wrong?"

Looking at her husband with stunned eyes, Anne felt herself recovering from the fainting spell. She wasn't sure she could speak yet, but fortunately, she didn't need to say much… simply pointing a trembling finger at the television set she had been watching before IT had happened and uttering a single word would suffice.

"Kim…"

James gasped as well as he saw what his wife had seen on the screen. Obviously the mute button had been engaged when Anne had collapsed, but sound was unnecessary. Even the twe… the boys, were shocked into silence at the sight. They were used to their sister turning up in odd places, but THIS?

And yet there she was, standing together with M.C. Honey and… was that Timothy "The Fearless Ferret' North? And a dozen other EXTREMELY familiar, if not quite instantly recognizable, faces. Along with the caption:

CAST FOR THE 20th SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS ANNOUNCED!

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AN: The Dancing with the Stars thing actually came up in an entirely different story I did in a challenge for NoDrogs at the Haven, but that version would have had Kim going undercover as a dancer. After thinking about it a while, I decided to try reversing it, which makes for a funnier one shot, I think. However, if I ever expand on the story, I'll probably go back to the other version, hence the choice of this one for the OmKimbus. Legal Stuff: Kim Possible, Ron Stoppable, Shego, Jim and Time Possible, James and Anne Possible, Monkey Fist, M.C. Honey, Duff Killigan and Timothy North are the creation of Mark McCorkle and Bob Schooley, and her name is a trademarks of the Disney media organizations. Dancing with the Stars based on the BBC series Strictly Come Dancing, created by Fenia Vardanis and property of the BBC. Although use in this context may be considered fair under parody law, just in case: this work was not created for profit, no money changed hands etc. Also, for these prudish, this story takes place at a time at which all characters shown should be considered to be over the legal age of 18….