There he is, in all his glory. Standing there, holding his arms out for me. His brown eyes shine at me, looking wonderful, per usual, against his dark copper hair. I can't help it, I take a step towards him, into his arms. He holds me close. It feels good.

So quick that my fast reflexes can barely catch it, he catches my throat with a knife, softly pushing the cool medal to my throat.

"No!" I choke, barely audible.

"Sorry Amber." He whispers, and presses the knife into my throat, cutting off my life.

"Amber! Freaking wake up, you worthless girl! There's a reaping today, if you didn't know!" Sadell's voice wakes me from my nightmare. I roll out of my bed without meaning, and end up on the dirt floor of my house. Not my house, I think, THEIR house.

I stand up, rubbing my side I'd fallen on. I walk over to the closet, where my reaping clothes are carefully set out. I strip out of my pajamas and slide into the satiny white dress that reaches my knees. Standing in front of the mirror, I try to run a comb through my thick mane of reddish hair, until quickly realizing it won't work, and tie it back in a big ponytail that sticks out behind my like a bushy fox tail.

That's right. I think, smiling slightly at my reflection. Like a fox. I'm aware that I look like a fox; it's just what happens with thick red hair, amber eyes, a long nose, and a crooked smile get put together. Whatever.

Stepping into my leather shoes set out especially for the reaping, I walk out the door. The air is cold, like it usually is in District Five. I don't get cold, not usually, so I walk ahead nicely while other girls are hugging their arms close to their bodies.

I drift over to the other seventeens, make Smalltalk and flirt with the other teens my age. That's what reapings are for, right? Well, except for the two kids that go off to the Hunger Games, but that's beside the point.

Then I see Jesse.

I float over to him, slide into his waiting arms, shivering only slightly while remembering my nightmare. But Jesse would never do that to me. He loves me too much. I love him too.

"Hey Amber." He whispers in my ear.

"Hi" I breathe, resting my head on his nice chest. "Ready to be rrrrrrrreaped?" I make fun of our District 5 escort, Ladilla Torano.

"Ha, ha." He sounds sarcastic, but do I hear something else in his tone? Resentment, maybe? Fear? I slowly pull away from him, and slink over to some girls, compliment one of their dresses, laugh at their bad nervous jokes, but I'm still thinking about Jesse. What was that in his voice?

Then it hits me. Jesse's going to volunteer.

Just as my amber eyes widen, Ladilla takes the stage, bright pink ringlets bouncing and jewels clinking on her eyelashes as she blinks. "Ready to be rrrrrrrrreaped, District 5?" She screams, delivering her famous line out of her orange painted mouth.

The mayor makes his speech, and Ladilla is prancing toward the girl's bowl. She claws around and pulls out a slip from the bottom with her zippered nails. She reads out the name happily. "Amber Kwanee!" She shouts.

Wait, what? I stopped short in my thoughts. The seventeens all stare at me as I step up onto the stage and look at the crowd. I catch Jesse's eyes. No way will he volunteer now if that meant going to the Games and possibly having to kill me. He shakes his head. Curse him! I'd been thinking about him too much to pray for my own safety from the Capitol. I smile at him to say don't worry. It's okay, but he doesn't believe me, I can tell. It was more for me than him, anyway.

And I'm looking at Jesse so much that I miss the boy's name that Ladilla shrieks at the District. I should really stop thinking about him, it's making me miss important things. I'm completely clueless as to who got picked out of the boy's bowl, and I'm just standing there thinking not Jesse, not Jesse over and over again.

But I needn't have worried. The boy who slowly walks onto the stage is one I've never seen. He's obviously younger than me, maybe 15 or so. He has creamy blond hair and a terrible complexion. The thought that I might have to kill him burns through my head as we are lead off the stage after getting our arms lifted by the wacko Capitol lady.

I am lead to a room in our Justice Building. It's a wide, spacious room and the closet is about the size of my room at home. Not home. I think yet again. My foster parents try their hardest, they really do, but it's a little obvious that they wish they'd never taken me in.

They don't visit me.

My first visitor is not who I want to see. It's not Jesse, as I'd hoped. It's actually my older brother, Christopher. He stands there, not willing to hold me in a hug, probably picking up my vibes of wanting, craving another person.

"Hi." He says. Hi? Hi? I've been reaped, I'm going to the freaking Hunger Games, and all he has for me is Hi?

"Hi." I say back.

"Mmm. Amber, I'm sorry, for, you know, everything." Christopher mutters before leaving early.

And the problem is, I don't know. I don't know what he's sorry for. Is it that he left me with wicked foster parent while he lived nicely on his own? Is it that he's sorry that the male influence in my life is not him nor my "father", but Jesse? Is he sorry that nobody volunteered for me? That I'm getting reaped in general? There are so many things he could be sorry for; "everything" kind of summed it up.

Next enter my friends Tara and Riley. They both hug me awkwardly and say reassuring things. I don't know if they're for me or them, because I'm definitely not reassured. The rest of their visit passes in a blur, because all I want is Jesse.

He comes in next.

As he enters the room, I stand up and forget that I was angry with him at the reaping. All that's in the world right now is him, and his lovely face, and suddenly I'm really close to him and we're kissing, and kissing like we might never see each other again, which is true. I feel good in his arms, not happy, not safe, but good. I never want to leave his tight hold on me. But, finally, he pulls back and looks down at me.

"Amber, you have to come back." He says, like I don't already know that.

"No duh."

"I'm serious. So you have to have a strategy. I know you aren't the strongest, or even the most powerful. When you're in training, pick up a few fighting skills, but what you really need is knowledge. You might not win by fighting your way toward victory, but you can definitely think your way towards it. You're smart. Use your head when you're in that arena." He tells me. It's weird, I'm not going to lie, to hear my boyfriend telling me what my strategy in the Hunger Games should be.
"Mmm. Yeah. " I say. But I don't really want to think about the Games right now. All I want is Jesse. I lean in to kiss him again and he lets me for a little bit but then he stops.

"Do you already have a token?" He asks.

I was about to respond with some cocky remark but then I realize that now isn't really the right time. So instead I just respond "No."

"Good." He says, smiling just a little bit. I stare into his dark eyes, trying to see what he means, but I find nothing. He's a naturally hard to read person. "I've got one for you."

My heart is racing, but I don't know why. But then Jesse pulls something from his pocket. "Hold out your hand," he instructs. I oblige, and stare at his hand as he holds mine in it and softly slides a ring onto my finger. When he lets go I look down at my hand. My engaged finger has a ring on it with an almost microscopic diamond on it. I gasp and look up at Jesse, wondering if this means what I think it means.

It does. "Will you marry me, Amber? When you come back, I mean?" He asks. A single tear slides down my cheek as I say yes.

Then we are kissing again until a red-faced Peacekeeper ushers Jesse out in a tiny, embarrassed voice. My last memory of him is his face, his beautiful face, looking impossibly sad.

My life was Hell from that moment on.