Csilla: Ano~ please don't be mad m;;
Rin: Like hell we aren't!
Gray: What the hell are you thinking?
Rin &Gray: WHO WOULD ACTUALLY READ THIS?
Csilla: Kris and Kaity... :D
Rin &Gray: Only 'cause you forced them *stare*
Csilla: ohh... *curls up in a corner with her laptop*
Disclaimer - I don't own anything except the time...
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It was a spur of the moment (and a huge "EVERYTHING HAS TO GO" sale at a local book store) that led to one, Levi McGarden into buying a book titled: How to Know You're Addicted to Yaoi / Slash. The book appeared to be something fun to read; she never expected it to change her life...
Symptom One: You start mentally pairing up random guys on the street.
Levi blinked a few times as she tried to think of any one that did that; Oh! Lu-chan!
"Does that mean Lu-chan is addicted to yaoi?" She wondered in out loud, lowering the book onto her lap before scooting down further onto her plushy bed.
Although now that she thought about it: Lucy wasn't the only one... lately Cana had been doing it as well. Levi personally never understood why they did that but when she bought this book she had secretly hoped it would explain it (besides the fact IT'S A NEW BOOK!). She sighed before raising the book up and kept on reading.
Symptom Two: You wish you had gay friends just so you could perve on them kissing their boyfriends.
"Wow~ Another thing Lu-chan does..." Levi quietly giggled as she remembered today's events...
Flashback:
"Ne~ Natsu, can you do me a favor?" It was pretty obvious what she was going to ask.
"If it involves me kissing Gray: no." Natsu and Gray had started dating a few weeks back, which came to as a crushing blow to Juvia and many of the other Fairy Tail mages.
"Aww~ why not?" Lucy pleaded.
"Because-"
"Because he's still a little sore from last night," Gray interjected a comment with a cocky smirk.
"So you two had sex last night~!" Lucy seemed like she was in heaven as obvious perverted thoughts filled her mind.
-Flashback Over-
Levi shook her head as she focused once more on reading, forgetting the fact that she had been on the other side of Lucy, giggling...
Symptom Three: You don't remember the last time you read a heterosexual fanfiction.
"Hmm," The bookworm mage thought back to the last book of Lucy's she read, "It was a boy-on-boy fictional story..." She added as she thought back further to the last time she saw Lucy read anything with a straight pairing in it.
"Oh yeah! Now I remember... That book Lisanna showed us! We read it together a while back," She gasped in realization, covering her mouth slightly with one of her hands.
"Lu-chan~ You should really read this book," She sighed in conclusion, mentally adding: 'so you can seek some help~'
Symptom Four: You have developed a sexual fetish for handcuffs, leather and BDSM.
Levi's eyes blinked as her mouth fought the urge not to turn-up in disgust; 'L-Lu-chan would never-'. Of course a vivid memory of an even happening last week interrupted her thoughts as she remembered Lucy and Cana discussing how Gray got those scratch marks on his chest and then how Natsu reacts every time he hears Erza or Gajeel walking by him. She recalled Lucy whispering that the sound of metal as in handcuf-
"Maybe I should stop reading... this..." Her big hazel brown eyes drifted across the next symptom's words, making them widen with each word.
Symptom Five: If you are a heterosexual girl, you keep trying to seme your boyfriend, despite the fact that you don't have the necessary parts.
She exhaled one huge sigh, mentally noting that Lucy AND Erza should read this!
"Maybe reading one more won't hurt," Her curiosity getting the better of her due to the lack of sleep.
Symptom Six: You suddenly become interested in gay rights, thinking this will increase your opportunities for voyeristic activities.
"Well, they do deserve it... though," giggling recalling all of Lucy's comments at once, "I don't think Lucy is any closer to witnessing any of Gray and Natsu's excursions~"
Symptom Seven: You try to get your friends into it, simply so you can talk to them about it without them getting that bored look on their face.
"Lucy did help me understand what was so interesting about it..." The bluette teen couldn't help but smile knowing that she was among many of the guild members who would also grin every time Natsu and Gray walked in together.
Symptom Eight: You keep lying about the number of hours you spend each day on the computer reading slash fanfiction, watching yaoi anime etc.
"That's Lu-chan, alright..." Levi sighed, remembering the last time Lucy walked in from one of her all-night yaoi-sessions and tried to lie, saying that Loki kept her up all night.
"All~though... Technically, I read a lot of slash fanfictions... but if anyone were to ask: I'd lie," pausing as a thought finished off her sentence: 'mostly Gajeel...'
"Alright... next one~"
Symptom Nine: The most exiting moment of your life so far was when you discovered hentai manga.
A snicker escaped without warning through her mouth; a hand pressed up against her mouth to prevent her from waking anyone else in the dormitory. Especially Erza.
Once she had calmed down, Levi's thought traveled back to the night she had stayed up reading yaoi manga when she accidently stumbled upon a hentai one. She later handed the book over to Erza since she really enjoyed that stuff so much.
Symptom Ten: You celebrate turning 18 not because you can watch R movies, but because you're old enough to watch movies with explicit gay sex scenes.
'One more year...!' She mentally screamed, clutching the book to her chest with a smile on her face.
Symptom Eleven: It's the only aphrodesiac you need.
"Our bad days usually turn into good days whenever we see Natsu and Gray being cute to one another," She softly mused as she continued on.
Symptom Twelve: When your boyfriend tells you he's gay and has been dating another man, you immediately ask if you can join in.
"One word: Lu-chan,"
Her thoughts traveled further back, back to before Natsu and Gray were dating (as Lucy called it) to the point in time when Natsu and Lucy were dating. Levi could still remember exactly how that day when Natsu confided in her that he liked someone else in the guild - "but I'm afraid he'll hate me" At first, she was taken back that Natsu had said 'he' instead of 'she'.
Symptom Thirteen: Your gay son wishes he had a normal, homophobic mother who didn't ask him questions about his latest sexual exploits.
Levi sat, imagining Lucy's future with Loki; them raising a little boy together... slowly the image of the mother and father transformed into a blue-haired woman and a black-haired male.
'Ehh... did I just imagine me and Gajeel having a child?'
She couldn't stop her mind from projecting a young male child sighing about wanting to have a normal mother.
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Csilla: Okay, I know this was a random fan-fiction~
Gajeel: Does that mean that-
Levi: I'M NOT! (n);;
Make sure to review~ :D