(originally published on Livejournal)

It had gone disturbingly quiet again in the SGC. The Ori were gone, their armies disbanded, and the very last Ba'al was dead. SG-1 was not back together. Cam had been devastated when Sam announced that she'd be taking the job in Atlantis, and for her sake Teal'c had been glad that Cam had not found out from her. Cameron Mitchell was a good man, a very deep feeling man, and though it took him a couple hours to be able to congratulate Sam without a hint of that hurt showing through, he did. Teal'c was there to see his cover break after she walked through the gate in dress blues, briefcase in hand, nervous smile on her face.

Vala said that Cam was sulking, but Teal'c quietly replied that he didn't think that was the appropriate terminology. And Vala gave him a look, but Teal'c knew she understood, because deep down it hurt her a little too. But Cam's dream of getting "the band" back together had been a long-shot from the first, and now it hadn't lasted more than two years. Despite the success, Cam had to be feeling insecure. Teal'c wasn't surprised when he showed up in the gym to work on his staff technique, and couldn't even raise an eyebrow when he went at it with jaw clenched and more power than he usually showed to off-world enemies.

Teal'c fought him with honor, and after Cam had been laid out flat seven times, he lasted a full five minutes in the next round and added a chuckle to his groan at the bruising blow Teal'c landed on his back. And Teal'c knew it had worked. Cam talked to Landry about SG-1 being on hiatus, and offered his services as a mentor for the newer SG teams. A good many of the old hats of the SGC were retiring, some having joined to defend the country not accompany scientists on explorations, and others just worn out now that the wars were over. But a whole new set of recruits was coming in, and Cam had enough enthusiasm still to teach them all. They loved him, and he loved them back, keeping his love for SG-1 on the back burner until they could all be joined up again.

Daniel retired too, in a sense, leaving behind SG-1 to focus on all the archaeology he had missed out on these past two years. He published several treatises on the history of the Ori and Alterans, and even accompanied the Odyssey when they checked up on Tomin's restoration of the Ori galaxy. Vala had gone with them as well, and Teal'c was not surprised when the two came back with a suspiciously close demeanor and an announcement that finally ended one of the most popular pools. Teal'c's memories of just how hard it had been for the other Daniel, the Daniel lost to time, made him grateful that this time around the archaeologist had needed no desperation to solve his personal issues. Teal'c had been just about ready to introduce the proper amount of desperation.

And as for Teal'c, he knew himself well enough to know that no one could help him solve his issues any more than he could. The ones that remained unsolved would remain so for the rest of his life, and he was content with that. His visit to the Pegasus Galaxy confirmed his suspicions about Sam's state of life, and even when she returned for good with shock and disappointment on her face, he had no doubt that she would bounce back all on her own.

His team was well.

And they finished Ba'al off for good.

General O'Neill was painfully flat about it all. Teal'c could remember when his first friend would have been quick with a quip or a remark to show just how much disgust he had for their most tenacious enemy. But Teal'c had also watched him lose so many things, hiding more and more behind a flippant exterior to keep the darkness of his reality from biting him, and Teal'c could only presume now that he had forgotten it had once been just a mask.

Cam and Sam had nothing more than satisfaction at the extraction, and so Sam was there for Daniel when he swiftly left to avoid the last shred of bitterness at failing to rescue Sha're from bursting forth at their triumphant moment. Daniel was able to forgive, but Teal'c could understand the deep resentment that this host was spared from Ba'al even when he had no family or friends left, while Daniel's own wife was not even given a chance. For once, Jack took Cam in his car, and Sam rode along with Daniel. Whatever happened along the way, Daniel seemed at peace when they got to the restaurant and Teal'c was satisfied.

He didn't realize until he returned to the base that evening that he had been remiss in his concern. His own anger against Ba'al, and his concern for General O'Neill and Daniel Jackson, had clouded his vision to the point where he had not thought to look beneath the thin mask of another comrade's emotional state.

There was only a silent drone of machinery as Teal'c descended to the gym, passing empty labs and halls devoid of activity. Once, the SGC had run at nearly all hours of the night, and he had found it difficult to kel'no'reem. Now, when he lived off base, it had become perfect for meditation. A quiet irony.

As he approached the room, however, dull thumps echoed across the likely otherwise empty room, catching his hearing before he entered and letting him identify that it was the punching bag getting the abuse. The higher-toned grunts accompanying each strike then informed him that the lone attendant was female, and then his own memory supplied the final details.

So it was that he was not surprised to walk silently into the brightly lit room to see Vala Mal Doran pummeling a swinging blue bag. Her hair, full as it had been in the morning, was now a cloud of frizz around her head as each dark strand had crinkled into rebellious curls, defying conditioner and curling iron alike (or so Teal'c presumed). She had been here awhile.

Stepping forward across the mats that covered the wooden floor, Teal'c made no sound until he was only a few feet away. "Vala Mal Doran, do you wish to be alone in this room?"

His low tone succeeded in not startling her, and she looked up at him, pausing to breath heavily.

Teal'c put out a hand to stop the swinging bag from crashing back into her, waiting for her to catch her breath. The t-shirt over her BDU pants was half-soaked with sweat, and it clung to the small swell of her belly that promised to be her and Daniel's child in many months.

"Thanks, Muscles," she said breathlessly, giving him an obligatory smile and tip of her head. "I don't mind if you're here."

"Is it wise for you to be so strenuous in your condition?" continued Teal'c, letting the bag swing gently back, and looking her in the eye.

"Oh, this?" she asked, glancing down at her own stomach and letting a hand stray unconsciously to it. "I'm fine."

As thoroughly as he had not this morning, he now noticed the look on her face. The pink glow of her cheeks did not go as far as her eyes, which large as they were made plain the hurtful emptiness that lay within; her skill with makeup could not fully hide the shadows beneath them.

"Perhaps you would benefit from a more varied work-out," Teal'c suggested without a pause, putting no hint of his true intentions into it.

"Really?" she questioned, a playful smile dancing across her mouth, eyebrows bouncing up and down. Her eyes were still dark, though. "I don't think Daniel would approve."

"I would be willing to be a more realistic opponent for you to attack," Teal'c continued, correcting without acknowledging her inference. "It would be easier for you to use your natural strengths in a style that has more ease and flow."

"Have you been watching those Jackie Chan movies that Mitchell talked about?" Vala asked, even as she stood up from her stance and turned towards the mat. "I didn't think Jaffa had 'ease and flow' styles."

"You would be surprised," Teal'c answered cryptically, following her to the center mat. "But I have indeed learned much from the films of this world. Despite continual assurances of the fact of their mythic nature, they contain much useful knowledge." After removing his boots and socks, he took up a solid position on the mat and settled himself comfortably in it.

"I wonder what the Lucian Alliance would think if you tried to take out six of their operatives with a ladder," said Vala with a smirk, coming to stand opposite him. He noted that her stance was a little heavier than usual, with more sway in her lower back.

"It is possible that we could succeed with merely the element of surprise if Daniel Jackson attacked likewise with a whip," said Teal'c.

"Mm, they wouldn't get the reference," commented Vala, imitating Teal'c's stance as she stood an arms-breadth from him. "Not even if he wore the fedora." She glanced up at him, waiting for whatever he was going to show her.

"Why did you come down here so late, Vala Mal Doran, instead of joining Daniel Jackson and the others at the restaurant?" asked Teal'c pointedly.

She didn't have time to glance away, and he caught the slight jerk of her head as she was caught off guard by the question. "They're still eating?" she asked, playing a desperate card of ignorance.

"No, they have continued on to drinking, which is where I left them," said Teal'c. "But you do not often come here; why did you do so tonight?"

"Shall I pretend you don't have an inkling, or would you like to stop with the checkers game?" asked Vala, a hint of frustration creeping into her tone.

Teal'c did not stop to correct her with the words 'chess game'. "You appeared to be in some distress this morning," he said, putting his arms up to indicate that he had not been lying about teaching her a new style.

"The Tok'ra and I didn't part with waves and kisses last time," she answered shortly, following his lead in her stance.

He threw out a slow punch, watching her eyes and catching the quick movement of her arm as she deflected the strike away. She did not bounce back with a counter-attack, which he noted, but the emotion behind her eyes was coming to the front, and that was more important.

"You are positioned to make your attack from the front on," commented Teal'c, nodding to her stance. "Your body is squarely faced towards me, and your arms are tensed for a strike, but you are only defensive."

"Well, it's not like I can beat you through brute force," she commented, taking the change of topic in full stride in a heartbeat.

"Then do not do so," said Teal'c. "Instead of waiting for a new attack, use it to gain the defensive advantage. Attempt to strike me."

She cocked her head to one side, attention captured by his rather un-Teal'c-like advice, but tossed out a punch with her right hand anyway. Slipping slightly to the left, Teal'c brought up his right hand to wrap around her wrist, then spun to the right using her arm to lead her body where he wanted it to go, bringing down his left hand onto her elbow to keep her arm locked. In a second and a half, he stopped just short of swinging her to the ground, holding her securely in the position.

"Now you break my arm?" she asked.

"If you wish to incapacitate, you may do so," said Teal'c. "But there is a school of thought that says that you may wear out your opponent without causing him harm, simply by bringing him to the ground every time he tries to attack you." He released her arm from the lock and helped her to stand.

She looked closely at him. "And you thought this style would appeal to me?"

"I know that you are not one who kills freely," he answered, nodding.

There was no answer, proving his point. But he had not doubted it; it was a surety he had grasped on when he first met Vala Mal Doran. "Now, you may try," he said, pausing before sending her another slow punch.

Her reaction was swift, but sloppy, and it took half a second for her to both dodge and grab his wrist, and she pulled him through without using her hand to stabilize his elbow. Before she got him all the way around, he bent and ducked under her arm, twisting until she couldn't keep her hold and then standing to strike towards her face. He stopped and inch short and held it.

"Have you given up?" he asked.

"Well, it didn't work," she said, half shrugging.

"Why do you not try again with the second punch," he asked, one eyebrow rising.

"Oh." She was a little faster the second time, though the higher position of the punch made it more difficult for her to spin him easily, but she remembered to lock his elbow with her free hand. After she had fairly successfully accomplished it, she released him and stood up. "It's like dancing with a rock," she commented.

"Remember, even the smallest opponent may use balance and leverage to his advantage, as may the smallest defendant," Teal'c said.

"Leverage," she repeated with a grin, her accent on the 'lee' sound. "I suppose he may use the opportune moment as well?"

"So he may," said Teal'c with a slight hint of a smile. "Such as the opportune moment of this afternoon for you to speak with Daniel Jackson or Samantha Carter about your distress at the extraction ceremony."

She didn't react this time, just looked at him. "We go from, what is it, kung fu to Dr. Phil?" It was clear that she was not fond of either, despite her willingness to take part in this physical activity.

"It was admirable of you to stay with Ba'al's host, but I do not think it was only for his benefit that you stayed," said Teal'c, taking his metaphorical opportune moment and pressing onward with it.

"Did you think that maybe there was a reason I didn't bring it up," Vala responded, sending out a flying punch.

He almost wasn't ready for it, but carefully spun her out of the way before returning with an elbow strike towards the face, letting her duck under it and dart through the gap to wait tensed behind him. "Perhaps that you preferred to wear the subject out on the punching bag," he continued.

"Perhaps," she answered, sending him a kidney strike with her fist. "Or maybe I like to think that my past is where it should be, behind me."

He turned to roll with the punch, wrapping his arm backwards around her neck as he did so and simultaneously spinning and lowering her gently to the ground on her back. "It is entirely possible to mistakenly ignore the past that still influences one in the present," he said, letting her up after she had a moment to take a breath.

"Everyone knows what happened," she continued as she rose to her feet.

"Knowledge is not understanding," Teal'c answered, striking forward a little faster and stronger.

Brow fiercely creased, she redirected his hits, turning with a grace he knew she would have. Teal'c could feel moments where he could have broken free, but this was just a beginning lesson and so he did not. "I don't need—" she began.

"Understanding?" asked Teal'c, capturing her attacking hand and bending it into a lock, pressing to put a little pain.

She hissed. "I didn't say that."

"You are afraid of revealing yourself so fully," said Teal'c, releasing her just enough so that she could twist free and strike back with a double-punch. "Your friends have guessed enough of you from what you have not said, so you feel that you do not wish to give them a greater advantage by being willingly open."

"Teal'c," protested Vala, her frustration from both his words and his neat destruction of her attack strategy with a few parries. "This analysis doesn't suit you," she added, a breathless quip.

"I have lived over a century and a half in this universe," said Teal'c in a low voice, shifting to more complicated attacks as he saw her body now reacting unconsciously to defend in the way he had shown. "Do not think I do not know what denial is, and what it will do to you, Vala Mal Doran."

She pressed forward with a stream of strikes that was enough so that Teal'c would have been hard-pressed to stray from the defensive. But then she glanced up at his eyes, and he caught her gaze, giving her a moment's pause. Slipping closer to her, he grabbed her arm with one hand and lifted her from the ground with the other, swinging her around his back and over his hip in a smooth arc. He heard her inhale sharply with the shock, but he did not slam her to the mats as was expected from such a throw—using his strength he lowered her gently, so that there was barely a light slapping sound as she landed.

She breathed out, a hand darting to her belly despite the soft landing. Teal'c was confident that she was not harmed; her pregnancy had been forward in his mind during the whole training, and he had tailored his own actions to be easy enough on her. Now, though, she took a few seconds to lie back on the mat, eyes closed.

He knelt next to her, sitting on his feet and taking slow deep breaths.

"It's not like I didn't want to say anything this time," she said, eyes remaining shut as if she spoke to an empty room. "I thought I was ready."

"What you spoke in the gate room," acknowledged Teal'c, resting his hands lightly on his knees.

"You're right, the past does influence us," she continued wearily, slipping up to a cross-legged position facing him. "I didn't deserve to be freed; I didn't fight. Quetesh took me and I buried myself as far away as I could in my own mind. She had her weak moments, and I didn't even try to fight free. The Tok'ra who captured her and killed her on that planet didn't know what to do with me, because I couldn't believe that I didn't have the courage to reclaim my own body at first. I just lay there, and then ran away before he woke up."

Teal'c nodded to her, silent and listening.

"And people always let me run after that," she said, twisting her clasped hands as she didn't quite look full into his face. "They didn't push me, until I met Daniel. And then Sam, Mitchell, Landry, even you Muscles. You challenged me to fight." She looked up, meeting his eyes for a moment, and he caught the openness in them before her mouth twisted as she looked back down. "But apparently that's not what they wanted, because when I fought to face all that I ran away from, they ignored it. The extraction, the face that had once tortured me as Ba'al, everything that I decided to face squarely—not even Daniel noticed. You run, they follow and stick to you like annoying burrs; you fight, you fight alone."

There was a moment of silence that Teal'c let linger.

"They are not perfect," he said quietly. "They have burdens they dare not speak of."

"I know that," she said, looking up with an off-kilter sad smile.

"What did you need to say."

She paused, out of surprise or hesitation he couldn't tell, but looked up at him before she spoke. "Do you miss your symbiote?" she asked.

Teal'c's brow furrowed. "It was a sign of my slavery."

"But it was part of you, wasn't it?" she continued. "Do you miss not having to sleep, not getting sick?"

He frowned, thinking for a moment. "I believe I have felt what this world calls 'nostalgia' for those days, despite all logic," he admitted.

She nodded. "And you chose that path, long ago. Imagine what it does to your sense of sanity when you miss the one who raped your mind and body alike." Her tone and face hardened, bitter and sharp.

"Is that what causes you distress?" asked Teal'c.

"Yes," Vala admitted, not letting the words linger. "It wasn't the trauma, or the pain; it's the fact that her mind and emotions still wait like a specter in the back of my mind, and sometimes I feel the loss like the loss of a limb. I can't stop it, I can't tell myself it isn't real...it's just there. And I might be considered mad."

He nodded slowly, watching her face closely. "You are not mad, Vala Mal Doran."

She answered with a bitter smile. "Thanks Muscles—that solves everything."

"You have not spoken to Samantha Carter of this?" he continued, ignoring her barb.

"Not—not really," she said, a little confused by his question. "We talked about being a host once, and how having other memories is frustrating...but it wasn't the same. Jolinar was Tok'ra; Sam remembers her with regret for her death, true honest regret."

"She did not come to that emotion so quickly," Teal'c commented. "For many days after Jolinar's loss, she was out of reach, lost in a grief she couldn't fully explain. Even when it passed, she confided that it still confused her, and I do not believe it was until many years later that she reconciled herself to it. I believe she would understand what you feel."

"Maybe," said Vala, sighing. "Teal'c, I wasn't lying. I want my past to stay behind me. I don't need to fight with it anymore."

"So is my belief as well," answered Teal'c, adding some warmth to his tone. "If you can forgive those who did not see your need, I believe that you will be well."

"I know Daniel at least had issues," Vala acknowledged, the built-up tension in her face slowly fading. "I couldn't help, though...I'll be fine. I don't hold grudges; the past is the past."

"I am satisfied, then," said Teal'c, standing to his feet and offering her a hand.

"Muscles, did you plan this all out or did you make it up as you went along?" she asked suspiciously, accepting the hand anyway.

He smiled to her, and remained silent.

"Thanks, for the fighting lesson," she said. And she meant more, and meant for him to know it, as she looked straight in his eyes.

"You are most welcome," he answered in a quiet tone that covered everything.

She exhaled, resting one hand on her hip. "I think I'm done for the evening; I'm hungry again."

"There is apple pie in the commissary," Teal'c commented, raising an eyebrow invitingly.

"I love pie," she answered, a true smile gracing her face.

So they walked from the gym to grab a desert in the silent mess hall. Teal'c had planned to go home early that night, but he forgot his plan. The rest of the team was out fairly late, and when Sam dropped off Daniel at the base, he was still a little tipsy. But Vala could smile honestly to welcome him, and his face lit up at the sight, and they looked comfortable as they walked out to their car where Vala would drive home. Teal'c was satisfied.

His team was well.