"I Don't Do That Anymore"

Vatican City, Rome

Pinacoteca Vaticana Museum

2:35 am local time

Carlos hated the late shift at the museum. He really didn't see the need to watch over these old paintings. No one in their right mind would steal one because there was nowhere on the planet that you could get rid of them. Sure they were worth millions, but even if you stole them, you couldn't just hang them on your wall. 'Besides, who is going to steal from the church?' he thought as he rounded the corner and saw the empty spot where Leonardo da Vinci's St. Jerome in the wilderness was supposed to be. He turned quickly and ran for the alarm button. He went five steps before two silenced rounds from a 9mm pistol hit him in the neck and head. From the darkness a shadow appeared and walked toward the empty wall. A gloved hand placed a white chess piece on the ledge below the missing painting, along with some dust that was in the bag the chess piece came from.

Paris, France

Louvre Museum

1:45 am local time

Gerald was going to kill Tony when he got back to the flat. It wasn't so much that he cheated on him, it was the blatant way he flaunted it in front of their friends and constantly humiliated him in public. It was time to cut his losses and kick the cheating bastard out of his life.

A hand wrapped around his head and covered his mouth as a knife was shoved into the base of his neck and up into his brain and twisted. He was dead in six seconds and his body slumped to the ground.

The owner of the hands then began to lift the "Mona Lisa" from the wall. After the painting was removed a chess piece was left on the ledge below the painting along with the same dust that was left in Rome.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Philadelphia Museum of Art

12:36 am local time

Dusty Martin was scared. He had really fucked up bad and had no clue how he was going to get out of this jam. He had tried his best to stay away from his wife's sister since she had moved in with them. Her no good old man had taken all the money and split with some girl half his age, leaving Trish high and dry. Of course his wife had told her to come stay with them. Dusty didn't want her there, but like always, he gave into his wife and let the woman come. It took all of one week before Trish had started hitting on Dusty, and two weeks before he had ended up sleeping with her. That was three months ago and now Trish was pregnant, and Dusty was fucked. No way in hell Trish's old man could be the father and she never left the house, so yeah, he was fucked. Fran was going to feed him his nuts. 'How could I have been so stupid' he thought as he rounded the corner in the exhibit hall.

All his problems were solved in less than six seconds, as a stiletto blade punctured his left eye and entered his brain. As the blade was retracted, Dusty stood for a moment and then collapsed to the floor like a ragdoll.

The killer then turned and fished out a list from his bag and began to gather the paintings that were on the list. A van Gogh, a Toulouse-Lautrec, two by Monet, a Cezanne, and a Dail. As the killer loaded the paintings in his bag, unnoticed by him, his list fell quietly to the ground. After they were packed, he took some clear strips of tape and placed them on several places around where the paintings had been, and then removed them. Then the killer placed a chess piece just above where one of the paintings had been. As the killer left the museum, he didn't notice that the list was gone or that he had left a small amount of dust around the place.

Watergate Hotel

6th floor, room 611

Washington, D.C.

9:34 am local time

The cel phone had gone off at least eight times in the last half hour. It had vibrated off the night stand and now rested on the carpet near the bed. Sam and Freddie paid it no attention, as they were in the middle of their second round of morning love making. That was just how they were. When they made love, nothing and no one interrupted or came before that. They had been married for just over a year, but they still couldn't get enough of each other.

Freddie was kissing Sam's neck, following the line of her pulse, slowly licking and sucking at the spot and then tapping his tongue up and down on it. Sam was moaning, already well into her third orgasm, when she felt Freddie enter her again. She still didn't understand why the "pulse thing" worked, by work it did, and she couldn't say no or stop her body from reacting to it when Freddie used it on her.

10:00 am local time

Sam leaned over the side of the bed and picked up her phone.

"Jesus, Noah's been blowing up my phone, there must be sixty calls on here," Sam grinned at Freddie as she rolled back to look in his eyes.

Freddie ran his hand down her face and through her hair, sending a chill down Sam's back. He leaned in and kissed her softly on the lips and pulled away, "So shall we call Noah and see what's in his bonnet this morning?"

Sam placed her hand on the neatly trimmed beard that Freddie now kept, and ran her fingers over it. "Damn it, you're one fine hunk of man Mr. Benson," she smiled at him.

"Well you're the most beautiful woman ever, Mrs. Benson," he took her hand and kissed the back of it as he took the phone from her and dialed Noah's number. Noah picked up on the first ring, "Where the hell have you two been all morning Sam?" he was almost screaming into the phone.

"Noah, baby, it's Freddie, why so uptight this fine morning?" Freddie rolled his eyes and covered the speaker and laughed at Sam. Freddie and Noah would never be friends or anything close to it, but they did respect each other, somewhat.

"Listen to me you walking gonad, put Sam on the line now," Noah was in no mood to verbally spar with Freddie today, things were going bad fast, and he wasn't in a joking mood.

"Relax Noah, I'm on it," Freddie said as he rolled over on top of Sam and kissed her nose, causing her to giggle. He then raised his eyebrows as he handed her the phone and slipped below the covers.

"Good morning Noah," Sam said cheerfully, "what's going on?" The last part of the question came out as more of a moan as she felt Freddie kissing her breast.

"I need you and your husband to climb off of each other and get your asses into the office twenty minutes ago," Noah, while mad, still never yelled at Sam like he did Freddie. He thought of Sam like a daughter and Freddie as the not quite good enough husband who was married to her.

"Ok Noah, we'll…" Sam let a low moan escape her lips as Freddie left her breast and moved down her stomach, "be there in just A MINUTE, OH GOD!"

"I swear, I'm gonna put saltpeter in that man's food, disengage from the sex and get you're asses in here NOW!" Noah raised his voice just a little and hung up.

"He wants' us to come…" Sam started to say as Freddie found his mark and made her moan even louder.

"Baby, that's exactly what I'm trying to do right now," Freddie's muffled voice rose up from under the sheet.

C.I.A. headquarters

Langley, Virginia

1:35 pm local time

"Nice of you two to stop fucking long enough to make it in here at all," Noah whisper shouted in Freddie's ear as the trio walked toward the director's office. He was red faced and beyond pissed. The director had been on his ass every five minutes for the past few hours wanting to know where the two of them were, and the man didn't take kindly to waiting for anything.

Before Freddie could say anything, Noah pushed open the door to the outer lobby of the director's office and spoke to the new secretary, letting her know that they were here.

"Freddie, Freddie Benson, is that you, oh my god it is you," she jumped up excited and rushed around to give him a hug.

"Karen, what are you up to?" he smiled at her.

"You know, working… oh my god, is that, are you Sam, he used to talk about you all the time," she smiled and hugged a very stern looking Sam, "I guess he finally found you, you lucky lady. Has he done that "pulse thing" on you yet? Girlfriend it will knock you into next week, and no other man can quite get it right, because I've had a few try."

"We were married a little over a year and a half ago," Sam held out her left hand, "and yes, he has done the "pulse thing" to me many times."

The phone beeped and Karen stepped back behind the desk and hit the intercom button, "Yes sir?"

"Send them in Miss Peck, "the director said in a stern voice.

"Please go right in, and I'll catch up with you two later," she smiled as Noah, Sam, and Freddie walked toward the door.

"Unfucking believable," Sam muttered to herself, "Every place we go. How many girls did you screw?"

"Sam, you know that you're the only woman in my life now," Freddie kissed her hand.

"Because I was the only woman you hadn't fucked at the time," Sam gritted her teeth, "I just want a number, that's all."

"Baby, I've told you, I didn't keep count, it wasn't like that," he gave her his best grin and despite herself she felt her heart melt. Why did he have to be so gorgeous?

"Glad to see that you two could find it in your busy schedule to breakaway and swing by and see THE FUCKING BOSS WHEN HE FUCKING ORDERS YOUR ASS IN HERE!" he shouted in both of their faces.

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT WHAT EATHER ONE OF YOU ARE DOING, WHEN I SAY HOP, GODDAMN IT, I MEAN FUCKING HOP! DO WE UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER?" he was standing behind them and got between them as he asked the question, his face purple with his rage.

"Yes sir," they both answered and looked at each other and grinned.

The director walked back behind his desk and opened the middle drawer of his desk and pulled out a piece of paper and sat it in front of himself. He then looked up at Freddie and asked, "You two have been in the city for the last two days?"

"Yes sir," Freddie answered, "We've been at the Watergate hotel."

The director picked up his phone and hit one of the buttons on it and spun his chair around and spoke quietly for a moment and then spun back around and hung up. He drummed his fingers on the desk for a moment and then lifted the sheet of paper he had set out earlier and shoved it across to Freddie, who picked it up.

"Do you know what that is, Benson?" he asked.

"It appears to be a shopping list of great art," Freddie raised one eyebrow and handed the paper over to Sam.

"Interesting choice of words," the director looked him in the eye as the phone rang. He picked it up, listened for a minute and set it back down. "Last night the Philadelphia Museum of Art was robbed. A guard was killed and several paintings, some of which are on that list, were stolen. That list, your fingerprints, and something extraordinary was also found. I have video proof that the two of you," he stood and pointed at Sam and Freddie, were at the time engaged in coitus at the hotel whirlpool when the theft was committed, but I can't help but wonder why anyone would go to these great lengths to put suspicion on you. Several thefts all across Europe, Asia, and now here, have been made to look like your old handy work. At first I thought you might be doing a little moonlighting on the side, but I can account for your whereabouts for almost all of them."

"I don't do that anymore," Freddie smiled, "I only steal for my country, now."

"Be that as it may, Interpol, and several other agencies want a piece of your hide right now. They assume that we are just covering for you, and that you are back to your old tricks. What can you tell me about this "list" and what it means?"

"Well, as we all know, anything can be bought, and what can't be bought can be stolen," Freddie looked at the list, "Sometimes rich collectors want something bad enough, that if they can't buy it outright, they will pay good money to have it stolen for them. I did "consignment" work like this quite a few times myself. The collector gets what they want at a bargain price and the thief gets what he wants. Of course the collector can't just hang the painting or jewels, which are also on this list, out for everyone to see, but that never seemed to bother the people who I would work for," Freddie looked at the director, "I never in my career, ever harmed anyone physically. What was the other extraordinary thing found in Philadelphia?"

"Moon dust," Noah spoke up.

"Is that some kind of drug or toxin?" Sam asked.

"No, it's honest to god, "one step for man" moon dust. It's been found at every theft so far."

"I've never been to the moon, though I've sent Sam there several times," Freddie winked at her and ducked as she took a swing at him.

"Freddie, really god when are you going to grow up… don't you even think about saying anything that you're thinking right now," Sam glared at him.

"Hello, I'M THE DIRECTOR OF THIS AGENCY, YOU TWO DEAL WITH YOUR PERSONAL LIVES OUTSIDE THIS OFFICE, LET'S GET BACK TO THE SUBJECT AT HAND!" his color went back to the purple hue that he had taken on earlier when he shouted.

Both Sam and Freddie spoke at the same time, "Yes sir."

The director turned to Noah and gestured for him to take over the discussion. Noah nodded his head and stood and walked over to the large paneled wall behind them and pressed a button. The wall slid open and a large computer screen became visible. Noah touched the screen and it came to life with a world map.

"So far there have been thirty-two thefts, counting the one in Philadelphia," he touched the map and thirty-two dots appeared on the map, "does anything on that list jog your memory? Maybe give you some idea who's wanting this stuff or who wants to frame you?"

"The two may not be related," Freddie stated as he picked up the list to look at it, "Maybe the thief is the one who hates me, not the collector. Some of the things on this list are very specific, I know where most of these were at and at one time or another have "taken" things from the museum's myself. The person isn't taking things that are the most valuable or even that rare in some cases. This is the list of someone who has a certain taste in the finer things of life. Hell some of this stuff most collectors wouldn't want personally. Wait a minute…" Freddie's eyes stopped scanning the list and he stood and walked over to Noah, Sam right behind him.

"You got something babe?" she snaked her hand around his waist.

"Noah, can you pull up the file on a Picasso stolen four years ago from a gallery in Spain?" Freddie stroked his beard, thinking.

"Sure," Noah said as he touched the screen and typed in the request on the keyboard that came up.

The file popped up, with a sub-heading stating that it was part of the thefts that Freddie was thought to have committed. Everyone looked at him and he smiled, "Four years ago, a buyer approached me with a deal, a certain Picasso was wanted and for a very generous price, I was asked to "acquire" it. What I wasn't told was that several people has been approached with the same offer. Two were caught quickly which made the whole thing much riskier than it had been for the two of us that were left. Long story short, my competition got there too late and was pissed that it was gone. He came after it and nearly killed me. He ended up taking the heat for the theft and I got my money and checked into who got the painting, you know, because I was more than a little miffed myself at the danger I had been put in. Run a check on Karl Dessler, German born, mid to late forties, no visible means of income, but always travels first class. He was in a Spanish jail, but I'm guessing he's not anymore. Also run a check on Nico Channing, the former drug kingpin from Colombia. He has a very defined taste in art and jewels."

The director and Noah shot each other looks as Noah typed Dessler's name into the computer, "Funny you should mention Channing's name," Noah said as Dessler's file popped up on the screen.

"Why?" Sam asked as she stepped forward to study the photo of Karl Dessler.

Dessler looked to be in his late forties with a receding hair line of brown and gray color, green eyes and a rather hawkish nose. The mouth had a slight scar that ran up the left side of his face from the corner all the way up to the left eye and then down in a jagged line to the left ear, which appeared to be missing the top almost to the entrance of the ear canal. There was no humor in the eyes, just a flat almost murderous glint that seemed to leap out of the photo causing Sam to shudder just a bit.

"Mr. Channing recently bought a chain of islands in the South Pacific, the Wheel islands and set up a little playground for the uber rich. The only laws of the island are the ones he makes," Noah stated as he read Dessler's file, "Bingo Freddie, released eight months ago. So you think this is our man?"

"He's a very strong candidate anyway," Freddie nodded, "and some of the things on this list have been items Channing has wanted to "collect" for quite a while now. How the hell does someone with his kind of past manage to purchase a chain of islands?"

"Because he had the money," the director spoke up behind them, "and because there isn't any proof that he's done anything wrong.

"Well you can bet the farm that those islands are going to become and old west outlaw town now," Freddie turned to speak directly to the director, "with him set up as the head honcho over it all."

"Still, we can't do anything about it at the moment," he drummed his fingers on his desk and sighed, "Now back to the problem at hand, we want you two to track this list back to its owner and see where the stuff is going. As a cover for you both, you are both being disavowed. No one outside this room will know about this assignment, so you will in fact be on the run. Noah will be able to lend you limited support, but it will be minimal at best, so that your cover isn't blown. You will be pretty much on your own."

"Gee, this sounds like a swell assignment, being chased by both sides," Freddie smirked as he ran his hand through his hair.

Noah touched Sam and Freddie's shoulders, "We want you to pick something on the list, your discretion, and "collect" it. We don't want to know anything about it, and we will see what happens."

Freddie raised his eyes to Sam's and she nodded and walked behind the director, so that she was out of his line of sight. Freddie moved so that he was now behind Noah, also out of his sight line. With blinding speed, they both brought their guns out and snaked an arm around the men, placing the guns to their heads.

"I guess that we may as well make this look good gentlemen," Freddie said in a low tone, "no one is going to believe two agents who were just disavowed would be allowed to just walk out of your office or the building now, would they?"

"You're not nearly half as dumb as you look Benson," the director smiled as Sam pulled him to his feet, "I suppose we should see you to the door."

"Please don't resist too much," Sam added as she shoved him toward the door, "I don't want to have to hurt you sir."

Freddie had Noah open the office door and then walk through, his arm still locked around his neck and the gun still at his head, "Karen honey, would you be so good as to get on the intercom and advise everyone that Sam and I will be coming through with the director and Noah and so that nothing bad happens, everyone should just stand aside and let us walk to the elevator, the two of them are going to escort us to our car," Freddie told her in a causal tone, almost like he was ordering lunch rather than holding a gun on a man.

"Freddie honey," Sam smiled at him, "we took a cab here, remember?"

"Ok," he reached into Noah's pocket and retrieved his keys, "they are going to escort us to Noah's car."

"Miss Peck just do as he's told you and then step inside my office," the director nodded at her with a grim look on his face.

"Freddie baby," she shot a worried look at him, "please be careful. I think you're getting in over your head."

"MISS PECK," the director shouted, "JUST DO AS YOU"RE TOLD AND KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!"

"Yes sir," she balked and picked up the phone.

After the announcement was made, the four of them slowly walked into the hallway and the staring eyes of several agents, all of whom had their guns drawn and held down at their sides.

"How about everyone just put those guns down real slowly and kick them to the center of the hallway," Sam barked at the agents, "just so no one gets any ideas about playing hero and ends up getting someone shot?"

The director nodded at them and the agents all placed their guns on the floor and kicked them into the middle of the hall. Sam and Freddie walked back to back, keeping the director and Noah in front of them as they walked slowly to the elevator bank. When they reached it Sam reached up and grabbed the director's badge and swiped it in the card reader that opened his private elevator car and the four of them entered the car. As soon as the door closed Freddie reached up and popped open the emergency exit and helped Sam onto the roof of the car. He turned to the two men, "This is where we leave you, Noah if you could give us a two day start with your car that would be most helpful," Freddie smiled at him, "I'm sorry about the teargas that they are going to lob in here at you guys, but that's why we're leaving early. Noah, when we get a chance, we'll try to contact you just to try to keep you in the loop, somewhat anyway."

Freddie grabbed the opening and pulled himself through.

"You two, be careful, despite what you think, I really am quite attached to you both," Noah smiled at them as they both looked back down into the car.

"Noah, I'm touched," Freddie smiled at him, "I thought you hated me."

"Only fifty percent of the time, you walking gonad," Noah grinned, "You have this nasty habit of growing on a person. Be careful and take good care of Sam."

"Always," Freddie smiled and winked at him, and then placed the cover back over the exit.

Freddie and Sam waited till the car passed the third floor and stepped onto the crossbeam that separated the cars in the shaft. They walked along the narrow beam till they reached the wall and then climbed up to one of the vent shafts. Freddie produced his tiny battery powered screwdriver and removed the screws that held the cover on. He carefully laid the cover to the side and boosted Sam up and inside the narrow vent shaft and then pulled himself in. They began to crawl forward, making sure to be a quiet as possible as they did so.

The elevator car came to a stop on the bottom floor of the parking lot. As soon as the doors opened, a concussion grenade rolled into the car and went off, stunning the director and Noah, knocking both of them to the floor. The rescue team rushed the car, weapons at the ready. The commander of the team scanned the car and swore under his breath, "Shit, they bailed. Seal the building off cover the exit's and start a floor by floor search. Consider them armed and dangerous. Take no chances."

The radios all over the building carried the alert and the search was on. In less than five minutes of the beginning of the sweep, the lights and the rest of the electronics in the complex went out, like someone had thrown a switch. Even the radios that the teams were using went silent.

Freddie pushed back from the computer that he had used to hack the buildings systems and hit the enter key, sending a complex pattern of codes racing across the screen, effectively jamming the terminal with a four hour main frame search for the word "the" in every report on file. After the four hours the program would shut itself down and return control to the building.

"You got your tazer on you?" Sam asked, pulling hers out and checking her weapon for its charge.

"Yep, my wife gives me shit if I don't carry my gear," he grinned at her and stood, pulling his own tazer out, then leaned in and gave her a passionate kiss.

Sam opened the door slowly and cased the hallway. She saw no one in it and then made her way out of the computer room, Freddie right behind her. The stealthily made their way down the hall till they heard the sound of shoes walking towards them. Sam tried a door knob and it turned, so both of them entered the room and closed the door, leaving it opened just a crack. Two security officers, blue uniforms, riot helmets, and automatic weapons slid past the door in a combat stance. Sam smiled at Freddie and quietly opened the door and they both fired the tazers into the legs of the two men. A soft clicking sound and the quiet gasps of the two men were all that was heard in the hallway. Freddie and Sam dragged both unconscious men into the empty office and began to remove their uniforms.

Five minutes later, both men bound and gagged, Sam, whose uniform was baggy, but would pass muster, and Freddie, whose uniform was a little small, but would work as long as no one stared at it too long, emerged from the office and made their way down to the end of the hall, like they were checking it out. Freddie heard footsteps behind them and held up his hand in a stop motion. The two people at the other end of the hall stopped and Freddie took up a position on the right side of the door and Sam stood on the left, her hand on the doorknob. Freddie nodded his head and Sam opened the door quickly as Freddie rushed in standing up and Sam went in at a crouch. Several seconds later he emerged from the room shaking his head and made an all-clear sign. The taller of the two at the end of the hall smiled and shouted, "Post up at the end of this hallway," pointing at the end closest to them, "and one of you stay in this hall and the other one of you prop the door open and stand in the hall."

Freddie gave the man a thumbs up and the two of them walked to the end of the hall as the two people at the other end walked away. Freddie walked to the security closet and swiped a blank card in the reader and was rewarded with a "click" as the door unlocked. He walked to the computer and inserted something in the USB drive and hooked it to his phone. He then began to type things on the phone's keyboard. An alarm went off almost immediately over the battery powered back up speakers, "Security breach sector six, fifth floor, alert, Security breach sector six, fifth floor."

Freddie then sent alerts to all outside guard shacks, informing them that the grounds had been compromised, and to begin a search of the grounds immediately. He then feed a two hour worm through the back-up computer and took the devise out of the USB port and put it back in his pocket.

"Shall we take our leave now baby?" he grinned at Sam and kissed her.

"I think that would be the smart thing to do, my stud," she laughed back at him as they both moved to the stairs and headed down to level one.

They quickly found Noah's car and drove out of the garage down the driveway and out the front gate without the least bit of a problem.

.

Raleigh, North Carolina

Westin Inn

8:25 pm local time

It had been three day since the great Langley Escape, and Freddie and Sam were now officially listed as disavowed and a threat to national security. The public at large knew nothing about this, but law enforcement and fellow agents were well aware of it, so the couple had switched vehicles and were lying low for the night. They made love in the shower and then on the bed before Freddie opened his laptop and began looking at the list he had scanned. Sam, as naked as Freddie was, came and laid down on top of him and placed her chin on his shoulder and looked at the list and the item he had highlighted.

"We're going to go after that?" she asked as she ran her hands up and down his arms and kissed his shoulders.

"Mmmm…" Freddie moaned as he felt himself begin to get excited, "It's the only thing on the list that Channing has that isn't jewels or art. I think this chemical, "Diesosaline" is his way of getting back into the drug trade. You see, mixed with the right things, in the right way, "Diesosaline" makes one hell of a potent drug. You don't even have to ingest it, just let it touch your skin and it gives an intense high and is addictive as hell. Most of the supply has disappeared except for the DuPont plant in Old Hickory, Tennessee, where it was made. They discontinued making it five years ago because it really isn't good for much else. It was supposed to be a preservative for food, but it cost too much to make and wasn't any better than what was already being used."

"How come the drug hasn't ever hit the streets, I mean if it's so powerful, shouldn't it be flooding the markets?" Sam asked as she still kissed and rubbed his shoulders. She had found her own drug, and it was Freddie and she loved nothing better than to submit herself to its power.

"Well that's why we're going after it," he rolled over, making sure that she ended up underneath him, as he kissed her neck, "the drug, "Sodie", can only be made by mixing two common chemicals with "Diesosaline" in a low "G" environment, like say the 16.7% gravity of the moon."

"Holy shit," Sam pulled away to stare into his eyes and they both spoke at once, "MOON DUST!"

"We'll check out tomorrow morning and head for Laurel Heights, Florida to see my "Uncle" Al and then we're off to Tennessee," Freddie kissed down Sam's neck and stopped at her breast.

"Why are we going to see you're "Uncle" Al?" Sam moaned.

"Because since we won't have as much high-tech help this time, we're going to need some "old school" help, and "Uncle" Al is the best there is," Freddie smiled at her as he kissed down her stomach, "He lives in a retirement community there and he has forgotten more about the "business" than most people have ever known."

"Mmmm…," Sam moaned as everything else she wanted to say left her mind as Freddie settled between her legs.

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Chapter one is done. I hope everyone likes it. I hope that this one turns out even better than the first. Please read and Review, Review, Review and let me know what you think. On a personal note, Tamathy and I were watching the new iCarlys, and Tamathy thinks Jenette McCurdy's boobs are getting bigger! LOL! She asked me to throw that out there for discussion.