Once a Month

Title: Once a Month

Summary: It's been one of those days; all week.

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Pairings: Noah/Izzy, Duncan/LeShawna, Tyler/Gwen, Harold/Bridgette

Warnings: Some language, nothing serious though.

Winter-Rae: I should be working on updating my on-going stories...but I don't want to. Anyway, this was written for the Free Day of Crack and Fanon Week over on deviantART. Enjoy.

Once a Month

The first thing Noah awoke too that morning was a very pleasant smell. His face was buried in something soft and warm, and then the smell of jasmine filled his senses. He slowly opened his eyes and saw that his face was snuggled into a mess of wavy red hair. The hair belonged to Izzy of course, the wild and crazy teen, and fellow former contestant of Total Drama Island; only now she was his wife and lying contently in his arms.

For the past two years he and Izzy had been living together, he never once tired of waking this way. He never tired of her smell or the warmth that seemed to flow right through and over his entire body when he held her close.

Yes, he had become somewhat of a romantic after the two of them had started seeing each other. He had never planned on it of course; Izzy just sort of fell into his lap one day and refused to get out of it until he agreed to go on a date with her. The whole night had been insane, and resulted in the two of them getting arrested. Which was a tame night; according to her. Thankfully they both knew a great lawyer, Trent, who was more than happy to help them out.

But even though the night had been one wild adventure after another, Noah found that he was getting used to Izzy and her wild side. What was more was that he missed it when she wasn't around. She kept him on his toes and forced him to be a little more outgoing with life, not really a bad thing, seeing as though he would have been doomed to a life of solitude since most girls couldn't put up with him.

Izzy, however, was different.

She loved his sarcasm and cynical outlook; it gave her something to playfully tease him about, which she did often. As it turned out the two of them were a great match, complete and total opposites but it worked. She helped him come out of his shell while he made sure she didn't blow anything important up.

Noah watched Izzy for a few moments, nearly chuckling out loud at how she purred while she slept. However it didn't last long, as she rolled over which told him that she knew he was watching her. Izzy had an uncanny ability to know when people were watching her, no doubt from her times on the run from the RCMP. Even when she was sleeping, those senses weren't dulled in the slightest.

Noah smirked as her bright green eyes snapped open and she gazed at him.

"Oohh, pervy Noah-boa is watching me in my sleep again," she teased after letting out a yawn.

Noah ignored her statement in favour of pushing her on her back and kissing her neck, occasionally nipping at her skin. Izzy giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck and nuzzled him lightly.

"That feels so good," she said, "I have taught you well."

"Hmm, let's see what else you can teach me," he suggested. Izzy laughed.

"Now that sounds like it could be fun," she mused, "But first I need to see what time it is."

She craned her head to try and look at the clock. Noah blocked her line of sight as his head moved to nibble at her earlobe. He moved to kiss her lips and between each kiss, he muttered a word of his sentence.

"Who...cares...about...the...clock."

After speaking those words, he drew the red head into a long and sensual kiss. Izzy pulled away and frowned. Noah sighed, looked at the clock, then back at her. While Izzy was usually always up for a quickie in the morning, today was a day she planned to hang out with the girls. And girl's day out was always very important to her. She would forever be a 'hoes before bros' girl.

"It's nine o'clock," he told her.

"Gah! I'm supposed to meet Gwen, LeShawna and Bridgette at ten!" she exclaimed, sitting up in bed and gently pushing Noah away. He watched as his wife got up from bed and started getting her clothes out of her dresser. He fell back against the mattress and didn't say a word. He knew that any attempts to convince her to get back in bed and 'play' would be futile at this moment. Izzy stopped when she heard no protests from her husband. She was surprised to see him just laying there and looking up at the ceiling.

They hadn't made love for the past week due to her 'womanly matters' so she really felt sorry for him. Noah had been nothing but a darling during that time of the month. How many men would rub their girl's stomach when she had cramps or always make sure they had an ample supply of chocolate and salty snacks during that time. Noah even entered the taboo area of buying tampons when she needed them.

What impressed Izzy even more was that she didn't have to educate him about it. Of course, most men knew about PMS but few knew about what not to say and do to their women during the torture period. She knew that Noah had a lot of sisters and that was probably where he got most, if not all, of his knowledge about the visit from aunt flow.

She sat the clothes she had in her arms down on the dresser and crawled back on the bed. She straddled his waist, with a playful smile on her face, earning a look of surprise from Noah. She leaned forward to catch his lips in a passionate kiss before saying...

"You, me, shower, now...and if you're good I may buy you a little surprise which will look good on me, but even better on the floor."

This earned a delighted smirk from Noah. Together they got off the bed, not bothering to keep their hands off of one another, and hurried into the bathroom.

Izzy grabbed her wallet off a table in the hallway and quickly shoved it into her back pocket. She was one of those girls who never saw a use for a purse, she could fit everything into a nifty little black wallet and decided to leave it at that. She then moved to kiss Noah goodbye. He wrapped his arms around her waist and deepened the kiss before she could pull away. When she finally did, out of an intense need to catch her breath, she looked at him and smirked.

"Well, someone must have really missed the sex," she teased.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because I'm still sore from our shower games, and then you kiss me like that. It almost tempts me to stay home with you."

"Oh?" Noah said; his interests perked as his hands moved down to cup her butt. Izzy giggled.

"I said almost."

Noah groaned in disappointment while Izzy kissed him once more.

"Chin up handsome," she said with a wink, "I'll be home soon."

Noah sighed and shut the door. He hated the get-togethers that the girls had every month. Sure, it was only for a few hours, but the house was so empty and things were so damn boring without Izzy around. He truly didn't know how he lived alone before they were married. He made his way to the living room, grabbed a book off the shelf, and flopped down on the sofa. He might as well get some reading in; it had been awhile since he sat down with Tolkien, Dekker or Peretti.

Izzy, LeShawna, Gwen and Bridgette were sitting outside a small coffee shop having lunch. LeShawna was clearly not in a good mood and eventually the girls confronted her about it.

"Oh Aunt Rose is visiting and Duncan just doesn't understand that I don't need to listen to his complaining" she huffed. She and Duncan had only been married 4 months and this was one of the first standard issues of marriage. Especially, when you were with someone who was slightly dense about women, like Duncan. LeShawna turned to Gwen who had just moved in with Tyler five months ago.

"Have you dealt with that yet?"

"Tyler is pretty much the same way. He doesn't understand that when I am having the painters in, I am closed for business."

"Have you told then what those sayings even mean?" Bridgette asked.

"Oh come on Bridge," Gwen said, "Surely they have heard of those."

"When Harold and I first married I told him that there was a massacre in crotch canyon and there was a big misunderstanding."

She then laughed at the memory.

"What happened?" LeShawna asked.

"He went and looked it up on the internet, turns out there really is a 'Crotch Canyon', named after an inventor or something," the blonde surfer went on, "But there is nothing that could possibly end up in a massacre there so when Harold came back and asked me why I had told him that, I had to explain to him what I meant. Even the smartest men can be clueless about PMS."

Izzy, LeShawna and Gwen burst out laughing at the story. After the laughter died down Bridgette turned to Izzy.

"How is Noah when it comes to stuff like that?"

"My Noah-boa has six sisters," she pointed out, all of the others nodded in understanding.

"Yeah, Harold has his mom and a sister, so I haven't had much trouble with him. I think he gets confused over the emotional outbursts though. He tends to think that he's done something wrong."

"Harold is always worried about hurting someone's feelings," LeShawna said approvingly. Bridgette smiled.

"Yeah, it's so sweet."

"So you've never had any trouble out of Noah?" Gwen asked. Izzy raised an eyebrow at the question and Gwen corrected herself.

"Due to PMS I mean."

"Nope, not a thing."

"So what?" LeShawna asked, "He just stays away from you for a week? I can't see Noah doing that since the guy is head over heels for you."

"He doesn't stay away from me at all," Izzy replied, "He's actually very sweet during that time. He'll hold me; rub my head when I have a headache or my stomach when I have cramps."

"Well, didn't you marry mister perfect," Gwen teased.

"If you can call a man who nearly sobbed when he didn't get his new D and D handbook on time for some convention, then yes," she said with a chuckle.

"Okay maybe not," the goth said.

"Harold didn't either," Bridgette pointed out, "I thought I'd never hear the end of it. 'Bridge, you don't understand! Without that book, my paladin is as good as useless in the next campaign!' Poor guy."

"Too much nerd speak in that sentence," Gwen mused.

"Getting back on track," LeShawna said, still looking at Izzy in disbelief, "You're telling me that we just need to come out and tell Duncan and Tyler in plain language?"

"It's probably best," Bridgette said, exchanging a nod with Izzy, "You could also tell them some of the common sayings you use, less confusion that way.

The two girls nodded. Izzy got out her wallet and removed some money to pay for her lunch.

"Shopping time ladies, I promised Noah I'd pick up something nice for him."

The others got out their money and laid it down with the bill the waiter had placed there.

"What do you have to get for Noah?" Bridgette asked.

"I was thinking some sexy lingerie," the red head mused with a playful smirk on her face, "He was so nice this time during Aunt Flow's visit that I figured I would give him a treat and we all know what a man's favourite treat is."

The other girl's laughed and agreed with her as they left the coffee shop.

Noah rested comfortably on the sofa in the living room fully absorbed in his book, when a knock interrupted the peace of the house. He put his book down on the table beside him, stood, and walked over to open the door. He was surprised to see Duncan and Tyler there, looking more than slightly confused.

"Hello boys," Noah greeted, unsure as to the nature of their visit, "Come on in."

He stepped aside so they could enter. They then went into the living room and sat down; Noah walked over to the small bar, poured them a couple of drinks, and handed them to the guys.

He then sat across from them and waited until they had finished the drinks.

"Thanks Noah," Tyler said.

"Yeah, I needed that," Duncan sighed.

"What's wrong?"

"LeShawna...she kinda threw a vase at me yesterday because I asked what she'd been doing all day."

Noah raised an eyebrow at him.

"Are you sure you didn't do something else stupid that you didn't realize was stupid?"

"No," Duncan said defensively, "I had literally just come home from work. She also mentioned that her aunt was visiting but then there was no sign of an aunt anywhere!"

Noah chuckled.

"Yeah, and Gwen told me that she had the painters in. There are no painters anywhere in our apartment," Tyler added.

"Okay, tell me exactly what was said," Noah said, having a very good clue as to what was going on.

"LeShawna said that her Aunt Rose was visiting and that she wasn't in the mood for my 'masculine bullshit.' She also said that her Aunt Rose wasn't friendly and was putting her in a bad mood. She's never tossed anything at me before...or threatened me with a household object."

"She threatened you with a household object?" Tyler asked.

"When I asked her why she was fixing so much chocolate desserts she said that if I didn't get out of the kitchen she would shove a mixer up my ass and turn in on."

Noah laughed and then turned to Tyler.

"How about Gwen?"

"Well she's not that moody, but she keeps saying these weird sayings," he explained, "Before we moved in together, I heard them on occasion. Now I hear them a lot more."

Noah decided to milk this conversation for all the amusement potential that it offered.

"Phrases? Such as?"

"Well, I was trying to make love to Gwen and she said that the painters were in and since they were, she was closed for business."

Noah could barely restrain his laughter. He himself had never heard that one but the fact that Tyler didn't get it was even funnier.

"Go on," he managed to get out.

"Well, I've heard her tell LeShawna that she was in a bad mood because she was riding a cotton pony, which I just assumed to be her thong. If it puts her in a bad mood why does she wear them?"

"LeShawna says that too!" Duncan said, "Okay, that explains the bad mood, but it doesn't explain the painters or Aunt Rose."

Noah could no longer restrain himself. He burst out laughing at his two friends.

"See, I told you he would just laugh," Tyler said, glaring at Duncan, "That's the last time I listen to you when it comes to anything."

"It was either this or Harold, beggars can't be choosers," Duncan pointed out.

"PMS," Noah finally said, when he finally stopped laughing.

"PMS?" Tyler asked.

"Better known as period," the bookworm offered.

"What in the hell does punctuation have to do with our problem?" Duncan asked. Noah and Tyler looked at him and then Duncan realized what Noah meant.

"Oohh, right, so that's why she's been so moody?"

"How could you not get that?" Noah asked. Duncan frowned.

"Family of four boys plus my dad, genius," the punk pointed out, "Mom never talked about that stuff...thank God!"

Noah rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, during that time they have horrible cramps and their hormones get a little freaky," he explained.

"So what do we do?" Tyler asked, "Just leave them alone?"

"Flowers, kind words, chocolate and lots of it, maybe watch one of those chick flicks with them...or a horror movie in Gwen's case, and learn how to cook and do your own laundry."

"How do you know so much about this stuff?" Duncan asked, "I bet Izzy drilled it into you right?"

"Sisters, six of them," Noah pointed out, "I learned what they like. Of course I give Izzy massages when she has cramps and things. Obviously I never did that for my sisters."

Duncan and Tyler nodded.

"So that will help the moods?" Tyler asked.

"Yep," Noah replied.

The two stood up.

"Thanks a lot Noah," Duncan said as they walked to the door. Tyler opened the door and started to leave when Noah stopped the two of them.

"One more thing. It's very important."

"Yeah?"

"If they are PMSing, and tell you to leave, get out of that room like a bat out of hell."

"Got it," they both answered and left. They passed Izzy, saying goodbye to her as she was going into the house. She kissed Noah on the lips.

"What did those two want?" she asked.

"You aren't going to believe the story I have to tell you," Noah chuckled. Izzy arched an eyebrow.

"Oh?"

"Yeah," Noah said, eyeing the bag she was holding, "Is that my present I get to open when you put it on?"

He wrapped his arms around her waist. Izzy grinned and gave him another kiss.

"You'll have to wait until tonight to find out," she said, "First, I want to hear this story of yours."

Bridgette leaned back in the bath tub and let out a yawn; after she had got home from her day with the girls she had run herself a hot bath to relax in. She went all out with this bath too, lavender bubble bath, which smelled just lovely mixed with the vanilla bath salts she had added as well. Was there a better way to spend one's afternoon? Well Bridgette could think of a few things, but for now she was alright with relaxing here with some lighted candles and slow music coming from the CD player.

Bridgette began to hum along to the music but paused and smiled when she heard Harold call out that he was home from work.

"I'm in the tub," she called out to him. She heard his steps coming up the stairs and he knocked a few moments later.

"Come on in love," she said. Harold stuck his head in and then leaned against the door frame, admiring her in the water. Even though he had seen her without her clothes on before, Bridgette had always been a little bit shy when it came to her body. So she was thankful for the bubbles that still floated in the water. Harold offered her a smile and then from behind his back, he produced a simple bouquet of orchids, which happened to be her favourite flower.

"Are those for me?" she asked.

"Do you see another beautiful woman in this room," he teased as he crossed over to her and kissed the top of her head. Bridgette giggled and took the flowers so she could smell them.

"They're beautiful, thank you Harold, but what's the occasion."

"I need an occasion to spoil my wife?" he asked, moving to grab a vase to put the flowers in, "But that's no fun. I like to surprise her and give her 'just because I can' gifts. Those are so much better I think."

Bridgette felt a warm feeling go through her whole body. Harold always found ways to make her feel beautiful, special and loved; she felt so lucky to have him by her side. She sighed contently and gazed over at him.

"I love you, you know," she said. Harold knelt by the tub and leaned in to kiss her. One hand cupped her chin while his lips rested lightly against hers. He then kissed her forehead and whispered, "I love you too."

They gazed at each other for a moment, before Bridgette suddenly seized Harold's arms and pulled him into the tub with her. Harold let out a yelp as he splashed into the tub and ended up in her lap.

"Well this is a little backwards I think," he said, while Bridgette giggled at him, "Shouldn't you be in my lap?"

"Shouldn't you be naked?" she asked, a playful glimmer in her eyes. Harold blushed.

"Oh my."

LeShawna was sitting at the kitchen table, enjoying a freshly baked brownie, with a large glass of milk when something caught her attention out of the corner of her eye. She looked up from her magazine to see a small white flag of surrender waving in the doorway. She didn't have to guess who was holding it up. She chuckled.

"Hello Duncan," she said, "Did you need something?"

He slowly stuck his head into the room, looking slightly sheepish.

"Can I come in?"

LeShawna, using her foot, pushed the chair next to her away from the table. When Duncan entered the room she patted it with her hand, and after he sat she got up and filled up another glass of milk. After setting that down in front of him she placed a brownie on a plate and handed it to him as well.

"I'm sorry," he blurted out, "I should have tried to be more understanding about...umm...your womanly matters."

She smiled at him.

"It's okay, and I'm sorry too, I should have just been forward with you about what was going on with me. Truce?"

Duncan grinned and shook her hand.

"Truce."

The couple sat in silence for a few moments, finishing their snack. Duncan couldn't help but gaze at LeShawna. She was beautiful, that was for sure, and probably too good for him. Not that he would ever admit it, out loud anyway. Hopefully she wouldn't realize just how good she was and leave him because of it; he didn't think he could handle losing her after being with her for so long. He reached out and covered her hand with his own

She looked up at him and arched her eyebrow at the concerned look on his face. Her free hand reached out to touch his face and gently turn it so he was looking at her.

"Hey," she said gently, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"You got this look on your face that says otherwise," she pointed out. Duncan sighed.

"Are you happy with me?"

"What kind of question is that?" she asked him, "Of course I am. Duncan, we dated for three years before you finally asked me to marry you. You think I would have stuck around for that long if I wasn't happy with you? Sure you drive me crazy at times, but it is part of your charm, and one of the many things that I love about you. Don't ever question how I feel about you. I love you, I'm your girl and you are my man. Got it?"

Duncan couldn't help but smile and then he nodded.

"Got it."

"My turn, are you happy with me?" LeShawna asked.

"Yes, sometimes I don't think I deserve to be this happy," he admitted, "I used to be a jerk."

"People change, don't let your past ruin our future," she replied, "We're good together, no matter what everyone else might think."

She kissed his cheek and went back to her magazine, still holding his hand. After a few minutes Duncan spoke again.

"So, uhh, did you wanna watch a movie or something?" he asked, "Anything you want, even if it's a chick flick. I'll watch the whole thing with you and not make fun of it or anything."

LeShawna smiled and patted his cheek.

"Hmm, Titanic," she mused, "And when Leo starts drawing Kate, you have to suddenly bring up that I look much better nude than she does."

Duncan scoffed.

"As if, she doesn't even compare to you in the slightest," he replied. LeShawna kissed him.

"Oh, you're good."

Gwen had been sitting at her desk working on a new sketch when Tyler came bursting through the front door of their apartment.

"I'm home Gwen!" he called.

"I'm in the gallery," she replied. She heard his rushing footsteps and cringed, hoping he wouldn't trip, like he did every morning when he got ready for work. Thankfully he didn't and he hurried into her gallery to hug her and place a kiss on her temple. He then nuzzled her neck and sighed.

"Did you have a good time?" he asked.

"Yeah, why are you so affectionate now?" she asked.

"I got you something," he whispered in her ear, sending a shiver down her spine.

"Oohh, what is it?" she asked, leaning back slightly in her chair so she could look up at him. He lent forward and kissed her lips. Gwen reached up to place her hand at the back of his head to hold him in the kiss for a few moments. She released him only when he squeezed her sides in an attempt to tickle her.

"Come and see," he urged.

"Okay, I'm coming."

Tyler hurried away, leaving Gwen to roll her eyes and follow after him. One thing to know about Tyler was that if he ever got you something he could never wait to give it to you, it had to be right at that moment. He could hardly contain himself on Christmas, birthdays and anniversaries, not that Gwen minded however.

She followed him into the kitchen and sat at the table.

"Wait here," he said. Gwen did as he asked and her eyes widened in surprise when he returned carrying two large grocery bags.

"Okay, I got everything covered!" he said as he set the bags onto the table. Gwen arched an eyebrow.

"What are you talking about babe?" she asked him. Tyler started to rummage through the bags and empty them out.

"Tampons, extra comfort ones, silky soft pyjama pants and a nice loose tank top so you can be comfy," he listed, "I even found some massage oil that is guaranteed to reduce cramps! Then we have some double chocolate ice cream, Midol, M&Ms, salt and vinegar chips, some Coca-Cola and finally Stay Alive; a nice horror movie just for you."

Gwen looked at all of the items that he had gathered and couldn't help but burst out laughing. Tyler's face fell.

"Would you rather watch The Notebook?" he asked awkwardly. Gwen got to her feet and crossed over to him, wrapping her arms around his neck and resting her forehead against his, so their noses were touching. Tyler's hands instantly went to her hips and pulled her close.

"No, I don't want to watch a movie," she insisted, "I'd go for a massage though. You are just the sweetest man in the world. I'm one lucky girl. Not many guys would go out and buy tampons."

"I felt my masculinity drop about one degree," he joked, "But you're worth it."

Gwen looked back at all the items.

"How did you know to get all this stuff anyway?"

Tyler blushed.

"I, uhh, asked the girls who worked at the store," he replied, "I said, 'I want to help my girl feel better during her...' I couldn't even say it though I was blushing like crazy, stammering, and gesturing. Thankfully one of the girls caught on and helped me pick out a few things."

Gwen laughed and grabbed up the massage oil.

"So this is really supposed to get rid of cramps?" she asked. Tyler nodded.

"That's what they told me."

"Let's give it a try; my back has been killing me."

As soon as she finished the sentence, Tyler scooped her off of her feet, making her cry out in surprise.

"I can walk you know," she insisted.

"Come on, you know you dig me spoiling you like this," Tyler teased, kissing her cheek. Gwen grinned.

"Okay, maybe I do, and as soon as Aunt Flow's visit is done I plan on spoiling you rotten."

Tyler's eyes widened as he understood just what she meant.

"Umm, so how long does this thing last again?" he asked as he carried her up to their bedroom.

"Don't worry Tyler; you'll be the first to know."

Winter-Rae: My favourite part of this? The interaction between the couples, I had been itching to write some fluffy goodness and I'm so happy I finally got to. So that was some advice for you boys out there, aren't I nice? Yes, you can all thank me later. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this and got a few laughs out of it. Cheers!