Winter – Part I

Warmth. That's how he felt and he reveled in it. He snuggled closer to the source of it and moaned as soft hands soothed his shoulders and back.

"Ein..." he whispered his beloved's name, his hands tightening around the source of it. The source stiffened for a moment and there was a whispered exclamation coming from it. Suddenly it drew away from him and the coldness of the winter seeped into his fingers. The blonde mage whimpered and tried to grasp for the warmth again. When it didn't return, he realized two things: his Hawke was dead and he wasn't cuddled next to him.

He opened his eyes and he bolted back in shock when the person stared back with intense blue orbs that had never failed to capture his attention.

"How do you know my name?" The man spoke in a surprisingly hard tone, a tone that the mage wouldn't match with his gentle Hawke. "Speak, now."

"I...uh..." Shit, how do I explain this?

He was saved from explaining when a door opened, the creaking sound distracting the both of them and directing their attention towards the newcomer.

It was Bethany, who had an armful of fruits and veggie. She almost fell over, the weight of her cargo throwing her off balance. Luckily, Ein had come to her rescue and caught her in time.

"Thanks, Ein. Unlike you, Carver is taking his sweet time with his help."

"Hey! I had to help out a farmer further down the road!" A younger male voice cried out from behind and soon, all three Hawkes were piled into that one room with him. He shouldn't feel intimidated by them. He had known Ein and Bethany for years. Carver, on the other hand, was a new element and Anders had a feeling that the other male wasn't as open to other mages. It was in the way Carver stared at him, those dark brown eyes glaring at him accusingly. Apparently Ein had noticed the way his younger brother was staring and he stepped in front of Carver, blocking his view.

"Carver, go help mother with the fire. It's getting dark soon and she needs all the wood she can get before the sun sets." There was a hard edge to Ein's voice and it jolted Carver out of his careless observation. The young brunette just grumbled something that Anders couldn't quite hear and promptly left the room. The room got a little bit less cold for Anders and he breathed a little easier now.

"Is he better now, brother?" Bethany asked Ein, placing her burden on a small wooden desk that was closest to the door. "He was really sick yesterday."

"He's better now. I may have to ask him something though." Bethany's back straightened and her head twisted sharply to regard Ein. Anders couldn't see what Ein's facial expression was as the older Hawke's back was turned to him. He did see Bethany's lips move but he couldn't hear anything. Was he going deaf?

Then Bethany nodded in a silent agreement and continued taking the fruits and veggies out of her woven basket, with Ein putting them else away, storing them in a bigger cupboard. Once it was completed, she leaned forward and gave her brother a gentle peck on the cheek before following in her twin's footsteps. The door shut softly behind her and Anders could have sworn that the room got remarkably colder, especially with the way the handsome Hawke was staring at him. Those blue orbs had hardened into diamonds, a look that Anders had seen many people get on the receiving end of his anger. He had never expected for himself to be in that same category as them, however, and it greatly disturbed the ill man.

His hands fidgeted in the blankets that wrapped around his naked form, clenching and unclenching themselves.

"I need to know something," Ein began to say, his hand beginning to glow in a soft blue hue. He walked towards him, the slow strides bringing up red flags in the blonde mage's mind. What's going on? Is he going to...is he going to hurt me? "Who are you? A blood mage? "

"What?" Anders' exclamation left without him thinking about his answer. "Maker's breath, no!"

"You were found by my sister and brother, wearing nothing." Ein was now standing above the mage, his intensive gaze making Anders a little uncomfortable. His Hawke had always been a little bit rough around the edges, but this one seemed to be even rougher. Perhaps due to his temperament as a mage on the run. "How convenient that the day after my father dies, you show up."

Anders' eyes widened at that revelation. Yes, he remembered his beloved having talked about his father. It was only the once. In fact, most of the facts he learned about Malcolm Hawke were gleaned from his sister as she told Anders that he reminded her of the late Malcolm Hawke.

"If you're not going to talk, I have ways, but I really don't want to use them. Father told me to only use as a last resort, to do whatever was necessary to protect my family. Tell me, mage, are you a threat? A blessing? Or just some happenstance of the Maker?"

"Ways? You mean..." Ein's eyes darkened when Anders put two and two together. He clambered back on the bed, trying to escape from him. He would never have guessed it! Never have guessed that this Hawke was a blood mage! Oh, how the Maker was ironic in his gestures. Anders had never liked blood mages. It corrupted even the best intentioned mages and he never met a good, blood mage. Can there be a good blood mage?

Anders' eyes hastily searched for the telltale scars on Ein's arms and true enough, he found a single line that edged along the forearm. Was Ein now controlling his mind? Reading his thoughts?

Then Ein did something unexpected: he backed off and the soft, blue ball of energy faded into nothing.

"Well, you passed the test." Ein smiled and it was a genuine one at that, throwing Anders even more off guard. What in Thedas was going on? Had Ein put him to sleep with his mind and he's just having wild dreams again? The dark-haired man knelt on the side of the bed and sighed as Anders hadn't budged from his spot.

"I'm sorry about my scare tactics," the man apologized. "But Templars have been patrolling our area a lot more often than usual. They must have felt the spell go off when Father passed away. I had to know if you were a mage sent by them as a scout. They sometimes do that."

"So," he began to say timidly, "are you? I mean...that scar on your arm..."

Ein grew puzzled and then he realized what the blonde mage was asking about. His eyes quickly glanced down, at the single line on his forearm. "Oh this? I was trying to set a trap and it sprang on me. The scar never healed and I'm really not much of a healer..."

"Let me see," Anders didn't give Ein a chance to refuse for he placed his hands on the forearm and he shivered as little bolts of lightning struck him. Even Ein felt it but neither commented on it. Instead, Anders closed his eyes and was extremely happy that the Maker still let him keep his gifts. The familiar, tingling sensation of magic flowiing out of his fingers felt good to Anders and it seemed to wrap around the scarred forearm possessively. Someone moaned and Anders didn't know who emitted. All he knew was that the wound healed and relief rushed through him as he saw the wound close from his healing spell. If Hawke had been a blood mage, any scars made to use the blood as an energy source could not be healed by any healing spells or even potions. The question though, why hadn't Bethany healed him?

"It's healed..." a husky voice called out to him and the closeness of it startled him out of his thoughts. This time, he found Ein gazing at him thoughtfully, as if debating on something. "So, you must be a healer? That's good. Me and Bethany don't really have that capability. She tried and it just made it worse."

"Oh, I see." That answers the question then.

"But I'm serious, who are you? I feel like I know you from somewhere." Ein's body edged closer to him and Anders couldn't help but let out a hapless moan as heat radiated from that strong body. Even as a mage, Ein still had his muscular form, probably borne from having to do the majority of the upkeeping around his home.

"I..." Anders' throat tightened. Should he tell him the truth? Would that in of itself change everything? For the better or for the worst? Anders tried to explain and he was shocked to find that he really couldn't remember anything now. What happened to his memory? He focused again, perhaps reasoning that the stress of his situation maybe made him forget temporarily. No memories came to him. None from his childhood, from his time with the Grey Wardens, and even worse, all those years he spent at his late beloved's side. All he could remember now was the odd tugging feeling of having Hawke as an old lover, but that was it. Did the Maker take his memories away? Was it to protect him or Hawke? To allow Anders not have to lie about where he came from?

"I don't know..." Anders finally said and his sight blurred until he could no longer see Hawke's face. Was he crying? For what? His lost memories?

A strong hand cupped his cheek and a thumb rubbed underneath his eye, erasing the tears that had travelled down his cheek. "At least, tell me your name," came the gentle request.

"Anders...my name is Anders."

Ein repeated his name slowly and Anders, even through his tears, could tell that Ein liked the name by the way his eyes brightened.

"Anders, I'm Ein."

-TBC-

Many thanks to my reviewers and readers. I love you all! :D

Since this is a brand new story, I have considered on who to pair up as couples. All the characters from DA II will show up in the story, but much later. So, please tell me who you want to see paired up in this story! Of course, Hawke and Anders are together. :D