I have often wondered why Kurt and the Gleeks aren't popular. When you think about it, the group is largely made up of football players and Cheerios who are popular kids. They are all fantastic singers and dancers who have proven themselves by winning at the Glee regionals twice, they were featured in a commercial and they love giving live impromptu performances. If these guys were in my old high school they would idolized.

Kurt in particular is a fashion plate, has a squad of fag hags who he hangs with, has helped the football team win their only game when he was a junior and was pivotal in the Cheerio's win at the national cheerleading trials. I bet in most schools he would be extremely popular despite the fact he's openly gay. So that is what this story is based on, what would Kurt's character be like if he was popular and how would he react to a very unpopular Dave's crush on him.

In an ironic sense, while this story is off cannon and totally AU, it might be closer to the truth in the real world. The story takes place during Season Two somewhere around the episode "Never Been Kissed."

Bully For You!

Chapter One

"What the Fuck? Were you just checking out Hummel's ass?"

"No way man! I was looking down the hall; he was just in the way." Dave groused, feeling his face heat up.

"Don't lie to me boy. Look at your red face. You were so checking up on his ass." Azimo stated amused.

"Man! I wish I had never confided in you about my sexuality. Now I can't look anywhere without you accusing me of checking other guy out."

"That's because whenever I look at where you're looking, there's some guy's ass right there!" Azimio added for good measure, "Ya homo slut!"

"Ooooh Az! You sound jealous!" Dave cooed. "Do you want me to check out your ass on occasion so you don't feel left out?" Dave stepped back and tried to look behind Azimio.

Az laughed as he spun around. "Fuck you, ya homo freak! Stop perving on me!" Dave tried to move behind him again, but Az was pretty light on his feet and shifted to stay in front of him. He grabbed Dave's arms, so Dave grabbed back and they started an impromptu wrestling match in the hallway, giggling and smashing into lockers.

"ladies! Do you mind saving that aggression for the football field! I want to see that kind of feisty spunk when we have our next game!" Coach Bieste bellowed from down the hall.

"Sorry Coach!" They both replied and quickly continued their ambling walk together down the hall.

"We'll see lots of your feisty spunk on the field when you see with all those football players lined up in and bending over in their tight pants, gay boy," Az snickered.

"Hey, you're really good at coming up with these gay-themed fantasies. Is there something you're holding back from me, Queer Boy?" Dave shot back.

"Fuck you." Az replied without any heat. He had more important issues to talk about. "So do you have some kind of gay crush on Hummel or what?"

Dave sighed, Az knew him so well. He couldn't hide a damn thing and once his friend smelled something amiss, he was like a dog with a bone; he just wouldn't let it drop. That's how he ended up coming out to his best friend in the first place. Azimio figured out something was eating at him and so he kept ferreting around and asking questions until Dave finally caved and told him that he was pretty sure he liked boys.

Azimio turned out to be extremely supportive in a bizarre kind of way. He kept making stupid jokes and calling Dave every homophobic slur he could think of. At first Dave was really hurt and confused by it, but he noticed that in every other way Az was treating him like he always did.

He still delivered his patented quick elbow jabs to the ribs with deadly accuracy, continued the slaps on the back of the head whenever Dave said something stupid and even continued the impromptu bro hugs whenever he was pleased, just like he always did. In fact if anything, Az was more affectionate; the bro hugs were more frequent, and they lasted longer. Sometimes they were even full on hugs. They were in no way sexual, but they certainly were comforting and supportive and Dave craved them. In between the homo jokes and barbs, Az would quietly ask serious questions about what it was like to be gay and show Dave LGBT sites that he discovered on line. He even tried to encourage Dave to join a gay youth group that started up in Lima.

Gradually Dave started to understand that the gay slurs were Az's way of preparing him for the day when he was ready to come out. Once he was out, homophobic insults would fly and he would have to weather it and not shrink back from the hatred. So Az was hurling every homophobic insult he could think of so Dave would know what to expect. Dave started to relax and joke and hurl back responses, giving as good as he got. Over the past few weeks the pair developed this strange sort of shtick where Dave pretended to make moves on Az while he pretended to be absolutely disgusted.

In a weird way, Dave was discovering himself and exploring his sexuality by actively flirting with Az. His friend was a good sport and never took the overtures to heart even though Dave was sure he had overstepped some boundaries a couple of times and likely made Az feel uncomfortable. He was gradually beginning to accept himself as a gay teen and though he wasn't ready yet to come out of the closet, he was getting there and he had Az to thank for that. Dave didn't really care if he was popular or not in school because he couldn't have a truer and more trusted friend.

"Well have you?" Az prodded.

"What?"

"Got a crush on Holier Than Thou Hummel?"

"No! Maybe? What if I did?"

"You don't stand a chance in hell. You do realize that don't you? He's one of the most popular boys in school and you're definitely not. He probably doesn't even realize you exist."

"Oh He's definitely aware of my existence. He constantly reminds me how ugly, fat and clumsy I am at every opportunity." Dave sighed sadly and hunched his back more.

"What a class A Bitch!" Az spit out testily. "What on earth do you see in him?"

"I wish I knew man, he is just so good looking and talented. Whenever he does those high kicks of his I literally swoon."

"Swoon!" Az chuckles raising his wrist to his forehead and buckling his knees momentarily. "Oh you got it bad, fairy princess." Dave shoved him away good naturedly.

"Yeah I guess so. What do I do?"

"Don't ask me. You know how long I've been crushing on Mercedes and how I've tried to get close to her. I might as well fall in love with the moon, it's no colder or farther away," sighed Az.

"Well at least we have each other to console about our unrequited love." Dave replied with dramatic flair. He casually threw his arm around his friend's neck as they walked down the hall and yanked Az's head towards his face so he could plant a cheeky kiss on the top of Az's head.

"You are such a flaming fag!" Az laughed and elbowed his friend in the ribs and escaped from his friend's hold as they sauntered down the hall.