Flustered

Rating: PG-13 (for language)

Spoilers: 02x13 - Archangel

Author's Notes: Apologies for the slow updates. I do intend to finish off this series, it'll just take some time. I'll keep putting episode summaries at the end, too, in case it does take so long those who read this forget what's been going on and need a reminder. :) Thanks to live_brave for the beta services. And thanks to you all who have stuck with this, despite the slow updates!

Nell is in the incinerator room, methodically throwing old case files and working papers into the oven with as much force—and spin—as she can muster. She counts the number of rotations, too, although she's not really sure what "record" she's going for.

The case was frustrating, annoying, and ultimately tragic. With each file she lets fly, she attempts to let go of the case.

Possible national secrets leaked.

*fling*

A dead end with a dead blogger.

*fling* (She gets 720 degrees of rotation off of that one.)

The nonsense with the FBI.

*thwap* (That one goes straight to the back of the incinerator, no rotation at all.)

"Nell?"

She's so caught up in her thoughts that she literally shrieks and throws the rest of the files in the direction of the voice.

Nell spins around, mouth agape, and is horrified to see Agent Callen standing in the room, looking perplexed with several loose sheets of paper floating to the ground around him.

"Oh, my god." Nell claps her hands over her mouth.

Callen's eyes flick towards the mess of papers at his feet and then back to her. "You know, death by papercut isn't really the way I thought I'd go."

Nell closes her eyes and wonders if she could fit in the incinerator and turn it on from the inside. Right now.

"I'm so sorry, Agent Callen, you caught me completely by surprise." Then, to avoid looking at him, she squats down and starts picking up the files. He doesn't say anything and after a while, she can't stand the silence. "What brings you down here?"

"You, actually."

She pauses, looking up. When their eyes meet, something in the air seems to shift. Slowly, Callen crouches down next to her, eyes still trained on hers.

*crack*

Nell notices Callen wince slightly and the spell is broken.

"What was that?"

Callen grimaces. "My knee."

Before Nell even realizes what she's doing, she reaches out and puts a hand on his knee. "Maybe you should ice it more. You didn't really have a long time to do so earlier."

Callen gives her a lopsided grin and covers her hand with his. "You saw that, did you?"

Nell shrugs. "You should know by now that Hetty records just about everything that goes on here. For posterity."

"Uh huh."

Silence falls between them again. By some unspoken cue, they both slowly turn their heads to regard the lone security camera in the corner of the room. Nell resists the urge to wave at it. She does, however, remove her hand from Callen's person.

"So, whatever possessed you to challenge Hetty?" she asks as she resumes picking up files.

Callen shrugs. "Hell if I know. No, that's not really true. Because she suggested it. Sort of. I think. Maybe it was my idea. Then again, it could have been reverse psychology."

Nell eyes him skeptically.

Callen gives a long suffering sigh. "Yeah, don't even. I have this conversation with Sam all the time."

Nell can't help but giggle. "So, it's like a friendly rivalry or something?"

"I guess," he admits. "She never gloats, not really, but part of me has to wonder if she enjoys kicking our asses on a regular basis just to keep us in line."

"That is the legend that is Henrietta Lange," Nell muses.

"That it is," Callen agrees. "But, enough about me. I came here to see you. Here, let me help you."

"Oh, you don't have to..."

Nell's voice trails off when she looks in Callen's direction. He's turned away from her, which presents her with a fantastic view of his backside. He has his leg with the sore knee stuck out to the side as a counterbalance. And then he leans forward, which causes his jeans to stretch quite nicely over his well-defined—

She catches herself just as her newly collected pile of papers threatens to spill from her grasp once more.

"Uh, you came to see me?" Nell hopes if she engages in conversation she can avoid any more potential mishaps due to inappropriate staring.

"I noticed you seemed out of sorts earlier," he comments. "And, judging by how forcefully you were flinging files around just now, I'd say you still are."

"Oh." It's not an answer, but it's all she can manage at the moment because she's a little surprised he took notice of her mood and even more embarrassed at her outburst.

"You want to talk about it?"

Nell sighs and tries to organize her thoughts. "I can't seem to figure out how I feel about what Driscoll did," she says after a long silence. "On the one hand, it was his job to keep the information safe. On the other, he was trying to honor those fallen soldiers."

Callen nods. All the papers have been picked up, so he stands. He offers a hand to her and she takes it. He doesn't let go after he helps her up. "But there's more to it, isn't there?"

Nell nods. "Yeah. I mean, regardless, I don't think he deserved to die, not the way he did. I can't imagine how Sam feels. He made a decision in an attempt to keep Driscoll safe and it didn't work."

"In our line of work, we face these decisions all the time. Sam knew the risks," Callen says.

"It still sucks."

Callen smiles wryly. "Yes, yes it does."

They stand there for a moment, neither saying anything, hands still joined.

"Is that all?" he asks, breaking the silence.

Nell blinks at him. "What?"

"Is that all that's bothering you?"

She sighs again and pulls her hand out of his grasp, moving to lean on the wall with her arms crossed, hugging the files to her chest. The room is small, so she doesn't go very far. Callen leans a shoulder on the wall next to her and she's comforted by his closeness.

"I just—I can't—" Nell starts. She opens and closes her mouth a few times, but no words come forth until finally, "The thing with the FBI was stupid."

The statement hangs in the air.

"You're going to have to be a little more specific than that," Callen says.

"The—the inter-agency rivalry thing we were doing. It's bullshit." Nell claps a hand over her mouth and looks up at him. "Sorry."

Callen laughs. "Who knew Nell Jones had a foul mouth?"

She swats at him, but he can see the smile on her lips.

"Yes, it is bullshit," Callen concedes. "Unfortunately it's part of the territory."

She shakes her head and takes the papers he has in his hands before moving to the incinerator and unceremoniously dumping the files into it.

"I don't get it. Aren't we all on the same side?"

"It's not that simple," Callen says.

Nell turns to look at him. "It should be."

He raises his hands in defense. "I know. It's stupid and complicated. Welcome to government work."

Nell slams the oven door shut, turning the handle to lock it. "It just makes me mad that we do all this posturing and one-upping when we could save so much time just doing our jobs."

"If I recall correctly, you were in on some of the posturing today," Callen points out.

Nell rolls her eyes. "I know and I'm not proud of it, but Hetty thought it'd be faster than going through the proper channels, which also sucks."

"That it does," he acknowledges.

"I just think it's more important to do our jobs and catch the bad guys than trying to show each other up."

She's surprised when Callen puts a hand on her shoulder, pulling slightly so she'll turn towards him. "You're a good person, Nell, and your heart is in the right place. Don't ever lose that."

She's stares at him, trying to read him. She knows he's not teasing her, but the comment seems strange. "You don't feel the same way?"

"I do," he says, "but I've been in the business long enough to know that you can't always escape the bullshit, unfortunately."

Nell reaches up and puts a hand over the one he has on her shoulder. "You're a good person, too, you know."

Callen doesn't say anything and the moment stretches before he steps back and her hand falls to her side. "Maybe. But I'm too cynical and old to really show it."

"Oh, I don't know about that," Nell replies, an impish smile on her lips.

"Which part?"

"Both."

Callen tilts his head and Nell looks him straight in the eye. She always seems to get a little thrill when she manages to stump the senior agent, but a part of her is also a little sad that he thinks that way about himself.

The incinerator activates with a loud click. Startled, Nell jumps forward and looks back with a frown at the offending machine. "I always forget this thing has a delayed start."

When she turns back, Nell's startled again because she's a hairsbreadth away from Callen. She tries to step back, but his hands on her upper arms stops her.

"Careful, wouldn't want to get burned."

Her breath catches in her throat. Behind her, she can feel the heat of the incinerator and hear a faint roar as the files inside burn. In front of her, Callen's looking at her with such an intense look, she's rooted to the spot.

Finally, after what seems like an eternity, Nell moves, pushing slightly against him and Callen steps back. She shakes her head to clear her thoughts and turns towards the exit, trying to remember what they were talking about. "So, what did you mean about not being able to get around the BS?"

Callen shrugs, holding the door after she pulls it open. "Just like I said. In the end, you either play along or you get thrown under buses and what not."

"Sounds like a horrible catch-22."

"It is."

"So, how do you not get trapped by it?"

"You play better than anyone else."

"Like Hetty?"

"Like Hetty."

They walk in silence for a while.

"It'd take more than one lifetime to do that," Nell muses.

"Don't I know it."

Their footsteps echo softly in the hallway and there's one more thing still bothering her, but Nell is hesitant to bring it up.

"Spill it."

"Wh—what?"

"You look like you have something more to say," Callen states.

Nell eyes him warily, wondering if he can read her mind. She opts to answer him rather than go down that line of questioning. "Is Sam going to be okay?"

"Yes."

"You answered pretty quickly."

"Yes, because he has to."

Nell isn't satisfied by the answer. "You should talk to him."

"Because we don't have Nate?"

"Because you're his friend."

Callen is quiet for a few moments. "Yeah."

When they reach the main part of the facility, they take different paths. Nell continues up to Ops but stops on the upper landing to observe. Kensi and Deeks have already left. Sam's hunched down in his chair, his eyes on the report in his hands. She's pretty sure he's not actually reading it.

Callen settles back at his desk, and Nell smiles when she sees him casually glance in Sam's direction every few moments.

Finally, Callen gets up, closes his laptop, and grabs his jacket. As Callen gets to Sam's desk, he nudges his partner's foot and gestures towards the exit with his chin.

"C'mon. I'll buy you a donut."

End Part

Episode Summary

The episode starts with Sam on a bus and a man pointing a gun at him and pulling the trigger. Flash back to hours before and Callen and Hetty are on the climbing wall again. Hetty is doing a fine job of psyching Callen out but technically has to forfeit when Director Vance calls for her with the keyword "Archangel." It's a word that means a major security breach. Callen, however, is still stuck on the wall and, at Sam's urging, opts to fall off it rather than figure out how to climb down. There's word that someone has uploaded Pentagon documents to the Internet about the war in Afghanistan. No one knows what they are. Sam is bothered that someone would betray their own by doing this. The FBI is involved and there's a bit of an inter-agency rivalry. The FBI folks have heard of Hetty but think of her as an urban legend. Eric and Nell help dig up info quickly on the lead agent, Frisbee, to perpetuate the legend. Jenny Weincroft is the contact, but it's her boyfriend, Matt Driscoll, who collected the information. He's a statistician and apparently too good at his job so the powers that be never let him actually deploy. The inability to serve on the front lines was getting to him. Thugs show up. Sam tries to get Matt to safety. Thugs want his ability to get into the Pentagon databases. Sam pretends to be Driscoll but the thugs shoot the real Matt, thinking he's an FBI escort. The last thing Driscoll says before dying is "Names, not numbers." It turns out the information he had that he was going to upload were the names and pictures of Special Forces operatives who had died on classified missions - Driscoll didn't like the fact that they were reduced to serial numbers and statistics. We also learn that Callen didn't fire his first gun until he was 20. Hetty offers a re-match on the climbing wall and Sam tries to talk Callen into it but Callen is resigned to lose to Hetty.