So, HI! Holy crap, this is my first FanFic. I'm excited, sorry. Ok so yeah.. Sorry for any mistakes I made. I literally need your feedback to know if this is ok or not, so please R&R :)

Chapter 1

I laid there in the cool darkness, just taking in the peaceful silence. Silence. I missed it sometimes. It was in these moments that I let myself think about him. His piercing hazel eyes that showed me exactly what he was thinking, even if he didn't want me to. They showed his vulnerable side, the side he closed of from the rest of the world. His ever present smirk that would only grow after he said a dirty joke, or if he caught me "appreciating the view". The way this smirk melted into a soft smile in the private tender moments where he opened himself up, took all his walls down for me, and when I would do the same for him. The way that, no matter how much I hated to admit it, he had a body of a freaking Greek God, and the way the he never let you forget it. It was in these secluded moments that I would allow myself to open the door in my mind that I always keep bolted shut and let all the memories I keep piled up in there flow out and take over my mind. I could think about him for hours. Oh, who am I kidding, I could think about him for days, but I don't. I don't think about him all the time because it kills me. It kills me because there is this deep, burning pain in the pit of my stomach that I know he caused. It kills me because when he left, he split my heart straight down the middle and took a part of it with him. Does he even know he still has it? That he still has a huge part of me? And if he does, does he even care? Does he even care about what he did to me? Does he even give a damn the he broke me, broke me into so many little shattered pieces that it has been nearly impossible for me to get to where I am now? With all these questions whirling around my head, a single tear slips down my cheek. Just as I am about to release the rest of the tears that have been building up behind my eyelids during my whole inner monologue I had going on, I hear a knock on my bedroom door. I quickly wipe my tear with my sleeve and sniff back the waterfall that is threatening to burst any second. I put all my memories back in that little black room and bolt the door again. "Come in." I say. My door creaks open and reveals my little boy. My pride and joy. The only thing holding me together at the moment. Elijah Berry runs in the rest of the way and does a superman dive on my bed. "Morning honey. How did you sleep?" I ask him as he gets up and sits cross legged in front of me. "I'm hungry. Feed me woman!" he replies back in his "manly" deep voice. I chuckle and quirk one of my eyebrows. "Can I please have some breakfast mom?" I giggle, "I thoughts that's what you said." He smiles back at me. "What would you like hun?" He looks deep in thought, with his hand stroking his chin and his eyebrows knitted together like that. "Pancakes!" he screams a few seconds later. "Alrighty. Pancakes it is. Go put your slippers on. I'll be out in a minute." Eli jumps off my bed and scurries out of my room, shutting the door behind him. I slip out of the covers and leave my feet dangling over the side of my bed for a moment while I think about my son. My 6 year old son, Elijah Noah Berry. He is a perfect combination of me and his father. He has radiant tan skin, short chocolate hair, which is almost always spiked nowadays, and gorgeous hazel eyes. His father's gorgeous hazel eyes. They look so alike, it's scary. He has a love for music, he is teaching himself guitar now, and is mature for his age, which he get's from me thank you very much. He is the most perfect thing in the world. A troublemaker at times, and very stubborn, but still amazing. He is all I, Rachel Berry, could've ever wished for.

Now, if you ever told 17 year old Broadway obsessed, dreaming of Tony awards and of New York streets me that I would end up a single mother raising her son in non other than Lima, Ohio, she would have gone into a long winded rant about why that would never happen and how you most be delusional. I know, me, the girl who was so high on the thought of getting out of this town, is now living in it, might seem a little odd, but let me explain. Lima is actually not as bad as everyone always makes it out to be. Sure, it's small, but I've found that 'small' is just another word for 'quaint'. I've also mellowed out dramatically since high school. I got a major reality check and realized that no matter how much you plan out your dream, it doesn't always guarantee that it will come true.

Being a pregnant high school senior does that to a person. Oh yeah, you don't exactly know what happened do you. Sorry. Well, here it goes. After Finn and I reunited in the beginning of senior year, we quickly realized that we just didn't work. We never really worked. After that was settled, we decided we were better as friends and went our separate ways. His separate way lead him straight back to the one and only Quinn Fabray. Don't worry though; I was actually happy for them. They just worked. They made each other happy, and that was all that mattered. My road led me straight into the one and only, Noah Puckerman. I guess if I really think about it, in one way or another, it had always been him. Anyway, we got together for the rest of senior year, and about halfway thru it, I found out I was pregnant. I remember that night. I had called him in tears, saying how I was so sorry, and how he couldn't leave me. Finally, after about 10 minutes of attempting to decode my blubbering, he came over. He found me curled up in a ball on my bathroom floor. When he crouched down beside me to ask me what was wrong, I just pointed to the counter where the stick lay. He got up and took it into his hands. He stared at it for what seemed like an eternity, expressionless. Just as I was about to start to bawl again, his face broke out into the most beautiful, happiest smiles I had ever seen. He scooped me up into a hug and twirled me around a few times. It was like some kind of twisted fairytale, but it worked. The next 7 months were filled with love. He held my hair during the morning and 'pretty much whenever I caught a whiff of certain foods' sickness, got all the foods for my cravings, even the most absurd ones, and stood by me thru all the mood swings. He was amazing. I think I fell more in love with him during those 7 months then I could have ever imagined. Then the day came, our graduation. We had a plan. We were both going to stay in Lima for a little while. Then when our child was old enough (we wanted the gender to be a surprise), we would move somewhere we both loved. Graduation went great. Tears were shed, promises of never losing touch were given, and millions of pictures were taken. Our whole group (glee club) decided beforehand to have a party at kurt/finn's house, since that was the biggest house at the time, and Carol made the best food. All of us had decided to head home and change before heading over for the party. I kissed Noah and told him I'd see him there. He gave me a peck on the lips before he left. About an hour later, I got to the party. I had tried to call Noah a couple of times beforehand, but he wasn't picking up. I figured his phone was out of battery or something, so I just let it go. It was about an hour later and he still hadn't shown up when I started to panic. I got Kurt and Blaine to drive me over to his house to see what was up. When I got there, all the lights where off. I remembered that his mother and little sister had gone to visit his grandmother this week, so I thought maybe he had just fallen asleep. I used the key he gave me and opened the door. I turned on some lights and yelled thru the house. I padded up the stairs and into his room. Clothes where scattered everywhere, and on his desk lay a note. I walked over and picked it up:

Dear Rachel,

I am sorry, but I just can't do this. I'm not good enough to raise a kid. I'm just a screw up, a loser. I know you are going to make a great mother. I will always love you

Love, Noah.

I remember my knees giving out and me crumbling to the ground. A few moments Kurt and Blaine ran up the stairs. They took the letter of the desk, and after they read it, Kurt knelt down and pulled me to him, holding me as I cried, while Blaine went back to the party to tell the others.

Yep, the first chapter. Hope you liked it! Will post chapter 2 if at least one person seems to deem it alright. Kay, thx :)

3, D