THE OTHER VERSION OF STAR WARS

Ok so here goes. My friend from school doesn't really know much about Star Wars. She had seen some famous parts from the movies, because that's what being my friend brings along. I asked her to try and retell me the movies. I've recorded it and translated it. I also added some of my comments, when I was later translating this. They are written in brackets ( ). That's what it sounds like:

Me: Ok go ahead.

Friend: In first movie, some folks race with small machines and then there's this small blond guy, who doesn't really know who his mother is and he's repairing a machine or something. Then there's that talking robot, that you can understand and I can't (I'm pretty sure she means R2 at this point, which of course I can't really understand, well just a little bit to be honest). After that they crash into something and they travel to some planet. I think they go from one planet to another. And then, then … I don't know. I know this movie is already made in colors, because the ones which had been made before aren't.

Me: They are.

Friend: Really? Well doesn't matter, they're old. Then this is new movie and there's the same guy and he is still him (no, really? :D), because then he becomes Darth Vader. So he is still him and there is this princess jumping around and they fight against someone, who is like really bad or something. Oh, and the princess has this weird hair, some weird cupcakes on the top of her head and she walked around like that in real life too when they were filming the movie.

*(awkward silence)*

Friend: Then comes Han Solo, who is played by Indiana Jones

Me: Yep that's right.

Friend: Oh oh and there's this bear. He's something like a panda bear and he is so awesome… no not really ( At this point I was already thinking about killing her, but then I would miss the fun part of her story. And I'm glad I didn't) Ommm… Then there's Luke Skywalker and I think he's the son of that first guy. The one that was repairing a machine. And yes Luke is his son, but he is older than the first guy in real years. That really confuses me. And then there's somebody called Darth Vader and with his son, that Luke Skywalker guy, they fight on a platform or something, with those, oh what are they called? Oh yes lightsabers… they fight with those lights and in the end Luke falls down, because Darth Vader says "Luke I am your father" ( I have educated her quite well, don't you think?). And Luke can't hold on and so he falls. Oh and yes in this movie someone stabs someone else, his uncle I guess. I don't know. And then Luke. Yes… No no Vader is in love with her (the princess) and he is really hot, Vader I mean (back to episode II and III… I think) when he is a human –when he becomes evil and dark and black he becames ugly-, but then his son is ugly too and he has a helmet-like wig, There's also this girl, I have no idea why she's there, because she does nothing. It's only that someone is in love with her. There's a kid. I'm 100% sure there is a kid somewhere in between. Ommm… R2D2 is awesome and 3PO and Yoda, who can't speak and has green ears (but as we all know Yoda is otherwise red with many colorful stripes across his body right). And there are those midi corleones (:D it sort of reminds me of Don Corleone from God father) and that Hyden guy has tons of them and then' he's so cool, cause you know people say: "You're so young and have so many mini or midi whatever corleones.

Me: No comment (hey I was in shock, what was I supposed to say)

Friend: I don't know how it ends, but I'm pretty sure Yoda doesn't die.

Me: You basically skipped episodes 2,3,4,6 and most of episode 5 as well.

Friend: But others were correct right? (Others or other? If we count something about blond kid a summary of episode 1, that is)

Me: Well… Not really.

Friend: It's really simple. In episode 2 they fight and in episode 3 they fight even more ( it's called STAR WARS… how could she know it's not about rainbows, unicorns and little cute squirrels) because the other guys are really evil. In episode 4 they fight and in episode 5 Luke falls of that platform and in episode 6 they fight till the end. And oh… they win and it's over. And the fat brown bear says: "Victory is ours… Use the Force."

Thanks guys for reading. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. When my friend told me this it really made my day so I decide to share it with you.

Have a nice day and May the Force be with you all.

P.S My friend wants you all to know that she isn't as crazy as it might seem while reading this.