Disclaimer: Do not own Dragon Age

"Always running after you. Or taking care of mother while you mark your territory."

It had been a statement drowned in jealousy, anger and inadequacy. I felt those bitter memories come to life, mocking me. The fatigue from our travels in the deep road settled in my bones as the last straw had my body giving out. My knees slammed into the stone floor as my arms remained helpless at my side.

"Mari please, sister stay with me." Her lips came up into a smile so weak that ripped my heart from my chest.

"Even back home, what could I be? The lone blade in a house of mages? If I excelled, it brought too much attention. That was a waste, huh? Could have found my fortune if Bethany was going to die on your watch anyway."

Always meant to hurt, to have her react in anger allowing me to justify myself. My own hatred that had festered since father's death would strike out as if it were a mad animal but now it was silent. Now I openly wept watching the taint consume my sister.

Still with a smile, her eyes glazing but I could still see my sister holding on. She had not succumbed to madness. "You finally listened to me and shut your mouth." The joke fell flat yet I cracked a smile. Her horrible jokes making the grief lessen just a little.

"Why?" A single word that held so many questions. Mari scrunched her brow, skin paling right before my eyes as the veins became visible against her skin.

She licked her lips. "There was no point. If I told you what could you have done? There is no cure. Anders said so himself."

"You need me."

Yeah, she needed me. What an arrogant statement. I gave a bitter smile noticing the blotches of black skin covering her neck. She needed the mage more then her idiot brother. The preachy bastard who knew the Deep Roads, yet she had left him respecting his wishes to remain top side.

The healer in her always calm, caring and supportive. She was the one others drew to like moths to a flame yet instead of burning she warmed their souls. I was the one that burned and destroyed. Purposely watching the bridges being destroyed between myself and others.

Varric, the quick witted dwarf with an aurora of mischief and curiosity, was quiet and withdrawn. He placed a hand on my shoulder. "Carver, she's right."

He couldn't accept this. Mari was the oldest, the protector since their father's death not only towards her family but to all who wanted her help. Oh, Maker why are dooming such a person? Why are you taking her away while I remain?

"Car-Carver pl-please." Her voice hoarse, constricting as her pale slim hand lifted towards my face. Those skilled fingers traced my cheek as my hand came up to hold it in place. "Please kill me. I beg you for mercy."

"You can't ask this of me." My voice wavered, begging her to reconsider. Too remain strong and fight like she did time and time again. "I beg you sister. There must be a way. Merrill, you're a blood mage! Can't you just remove the taint?"

The tiny elf held my imploring gaze before dropping her eyes to the floor. "I could try." I felt hope stirring until she continued. "But I will not. The taint could go too deep and instead of saving her life I could be ripping the blood from her very body." She raised her head eyes glazed. "I am so sorry, Carver."

"Then what good are you? For someone who controls blood this should be easier then consorting with demons." The beast inside reared its head, snarling and snapping at a target. "Useless. No wonder your clan dumped you on us."

"Whoa now that's enough." Varric stepped in hand tightening on my shoulder. "Its not Daisy's fault and you heard her. It could do more damage, could be more painful then this taint. You know what has to be done."He paused as I wrestled with my own thoughts. "If you can't do it. I'll give her mercy."

It would have been easier to allow Varric to end her life. The responsibility, the weight of taking someone close would fall to him, but he wasn't related to her. He wasn't her brother.

Aveline knelt next to Wesley. Her eyes filled with sorrow and pain as the blade pressed against her husband's chest. Her mouth moved, eyes still holding his as the blade slid home silencing him. Finally, she closed her eyes shedding tears for her husband, friend and lover.

If she could take the life of one she loved then I could do so as well. Despite the trembling of my body and the grief in my heart. I removed the knife from my boot and placed it above Mari's heart. She smiled, eyes full of love and pain.

"I believe this is the part were I make some grand statement about love, about regrets or some riveting line of motivation." She paused taking in another breath as her eyes strayed to the dwarf. "But I can't think of anything so Varric I leave this to you."

"No worries, Hawke." Varric smiled. "I'll give you a farewell that will have everyone treating it like a Chantry prayer."

"Not too long I hope."

He chuckled. "The greatest are the ones that are short, and unforgettable."

She smiled eyes turning back to me. Her cold fingers curling against my cheek as I still held her hand there. "I never hated you. I wanted to strangle you or freeze off your bits at times, but never hated you. I love you, Carver."

"I love you to sister." There was no more to say as my steady hands moved without thought. The dagger pierced the cloth, skin and hit her heart. The blood pooled around the dagger staining the hilt, her robes and my hand.

She had closed her eyes right before the blade took her life leaving her body as if she were a sleep.I placed her hands on her body. Varric cursed once more and Merrill sobbed. The cool tears tracked down my face littering the dusty cave floor yet I felt numb. Was this how Aveline felt? A void growing in my heart as stones filled my throat. Time became lost till the mourning had passed for now.

I stood leaving the blade in her body not having the energy nor the heart to pull it from her chest. Oh Maker, why did you make me do this?

Merrill bumped my shoulder. "I do not know how to control fire, but I can give her a resting place away from darkspawn."

I merely nodded not bothering with words as she raised her hands caused the earth to shake. The rock rose up encasing my sister's body in a rock tomb before slowly easing into the ground once more. All that was left was the disturbed floor that now marked the grave site for Mari Hawke.

Author's Note:

I'm not sure were this idea came from, but poof it appeared and moved in. I have no clue exactly were this entire story is going but just enjoy the ride hopefully it won't stall out or veer off its course and crash and burn. I wouldn't mind suggestions or ideas for the plot. The ideas you give me help with my inspiration. I also would like to warn I don't know if it will follow the story word for word or mission for mission. It might just turn into a complete AU.