There's no way in hell that I will like him!
- The Joker

Summary:
I had recently entered college with my overbearing Boy Love loving cousin. And she has set her sights on getting me and this mysterious transfer together! Fangirls squeal, I will keel… SebaCiel/AU/OOC

Rating:
T, to M later on. ;)))

Word Count:
1,736

Disclaimer:
I love disclaimers. It gives proof that I don't own shit. :) XD

~ .: Chapter 1 – Enter: Tall Dark and Distraction! – :. ~

It was nearing the end of the semester and tests were being studied for. I hated this time of year. It was almost as overbearing as my cousin, Lizzy, but now was not the time for such thoughts. I should focus more on revising than annoyances.

Seeing all the dead and dejected looks on people's faces made me grin - mentally of course. A sadist at heart but a historian at mind. The works that history made were indeed magnificent and interesting, but not the sort of interesting I wanted. But you cannot always get what you want. Having to go to an anime convention with Lizzy taught me that.

And my mind drifted to nothing again. I sighed and grabbed my belongings, walking out of the library with a tired smile. Spending a whole night at the library with no form of comfortable sleeping furniture was almost close enough to hell as studying.

"Ciel~!"

I shuddered but turned to give a small smile to the blonde anyway.

"Why hello dear cousin. Out to not study I presume?" I faked the posh vocab. She rolled her eyes and gave a grin before hugging me.

"I just got out of the club. You should really meet some of my friends! They're good people!" she whined.

"No," I deadpanned.

"Why~?" she continued with the incessant whining. I could facepalm but then I would get books and pens to the face as well.

"Because I have tests to study for and any friend of yours, is an annoyance of mine," I told her honestly, sticking my pierced tongue out at her.

"You know how much I love seeing that piercing?" she giggled, causing me to roll my eyes this time.

"Do you know how much I love rebelling against society?" I asked, smirking. Ah yes. Society and its many rules. It sucks and I refuse to conform.

"Yet you will not accept the love of the art of yaoi!" she gasped dramatically. Oh no…

"Please don't give me that whole speech now! I already had a terrible sleep!" I cried as lines of gloom and impending doom crossed on my face.

"Whatever," she said, crossing her arms and pouting. "Come to the mall with me after your little nap or something okay?"

"I'm not a child you know!" I called after her as she walked away with a bounce in her step. I sighed and shook my head.

I really wanted to sleep, and that I did.

;P ;P ;P

The next day I got a call from Lizzy. I was half asleep but she was fan-girling over something. I could care less so I want back to sleep again, the phone dropping on the floor with a light 'thud'.

XD XD XD

The door to my room slammed open. I hated how open campus is.

"What the fuck?" I mumbled from my pillow. She pulled the blankets off of me, leaving my half naked body out in the cold.

"I told you to get up and hurry up!" she growled. I also hate how much girls can be so…well, pms-y at the most random times.

"Why the fuck would I do that?" I growled as I hugged my body-heat-warmed pillow for some warmth. I am not the happiest of chaps in the morning if you haven't noticed.

"New guy equals hotness~!" she squealed as she clasped her hands together and made weird day dreamy faces.

"I know that look and no. I have been the apple of the eye of your sick boy love fantasies and refuse to partake in them any longer!" I said firmly, ripping the thick sheet of the bed and using them as a blanket instead,

"He's not interested either. He's completely straight," she sighed disappointedly.

"First of all, good, and second of all, how do you know?" I asked, still hugging my pillow like a child. I should really buy a full-body-sized one…

"Well you remember Grell right?" she said.

"Yeah. The guy who fancies himself to be a woman, is completely obsessed with red and has failed at committing suicide so many times that if he were a suicide bomber, people wouldn't need to fear him at all," I summed.

"I'm facebook-ing that," she giggled, "But yes, that's the guy. Anyway, he flirted with the mysterious transfer and the transfer didn't do anything!"

"Well who would want to date Sutcliffe anyway?"

"Um, how about the hottest gay guy on campus?" she squealed. "Will totally has it for him!"

"That is also a part of the fantasy world which I want no part in," I pointed. She rolled her eyes at me like she always did when I mentioned my obvious reluctance with anything pertaining to her and her BL.

"Just see him and you'll know why I think he is just perfect for you!" she sniggered. I sighed. She knew I was somewhat asexual, having no attraction to women and certainly not men. That's the problem with having a close female be into things to do with you but not you…and those things happen to involve you and other men. Traumatizing on both sides of the playing field…to me at least. It's not the worst trauma in the world, but I think it contributes to why I never had a serious relationship…

Anyway, I pushed Lizzy out of my room, reluctantly getting changed to go out to god-knows-where with her. There's another thing to add to the list of hate; the man who made Lizzy fan-girl crazy

:) :) :)

And so after about a good half an hour to forty-five minutes, we went into town to a coffee shop. I usually ordered tea, but I really needed the caffeine now. Karma for laughing at others tired dispositions? Maybe.

"Oh! He's here!" she hissed in excitement. I had to fight back a yawn. I was so tired but I didn't want her to think it was because of this. If she did think that way, she'd just set me up on a date with the random. I rubbed my one tired eye, the other being equally as tired but covered with an eye patch. I blame Lizzy's cosplaying on this one. She kind of injured me before I had to dress up for the stupid thing and I had to wear this…And I somehow grew attached to it. But I have a weird scar on my eye anyway so this stops annoying questions about the oddly shaped scar. Now people just stare at me (or my eye patch I should say) for a good few minutes, then make up a weird story in their heads that makes sense.

"Hi Sebastian!"

I lazily blinked up to see a pale, raven. If I commented on his looks, that would make me seem gay and like I have a type so let's just say he was almost as good looking as me. Insert Yoda voice and 'Conceited narcissistic jerk, I am.'

"Hello Miss…Elizabeth, was it?" he said in a low voice. Dear God, how many times did he hit puberty just to get it that low and husky? It was like listening to a slow jazz singer speak normally! I kind of understand why Lizzy was fan-girling; this guy was good. And that made me wary.

"You remembered me!" she said happily clapping her hands as he put on a plastic-looking smile. "This is Ciel. My cousin."

"Hi," I muttered and nodded my head in a curt manner. He redirected his smile at me.

"So do you work here Sebastian?" she asked, scanning at him up and down.

"I take late classes so I work here at this café for the time being. I also bump into some teachers here quite frequently so I get to ask them questions about classes before they start, which is kind of a bonus I guess…"

"Oh~! I wish I could work here then~!" she whined. Dear God, once again I pray, that whining is more annoying than some of the people who preach peace and love in your name only to besmirch it with war…Early morning poetic mood = more caffeine.

"Are you here to chat up my cousin or take orders?" I asked, somewhat irritably. Ah, I hope that wasn't take as a sign of jealous. God, strike me down on the spot if they take it the wrong wa-

"Jealous are we Ciel?" Lizzy remarked, smirking. Kill me now.

"No. That is the filter in your brain telling you I am. I woke up at six in the bloody morning to go with you and I want my coffee now after that lack of sleep," I said all at once. I hope that you got all that because I am not going to write that down. Elizabeth glared at me for a second before…

"It's alright Miss. I sometimes feel the same way so I understand," the 'Sebastian' person said, still smiling in that plastic way. "Your order, Ciel?"

My name rolling off of his tongue was like a poison, or was it an addicting drug? Either way, it brought a cold sensation down my back and I wasn't sure whether I liked it or not.

"Something sweet and with caffeine. I honestly don't care what it is so you can either surprise me or give me a shot of something they use in hospital," I answered with dry humor laced loosely within my words. He chuckled and the sensation returned.

"Right away," he said. Did I just see a wink?

It wasn't long before I had a cup of caffeine filled hot chocolate. It was perfect actually. Sweet and a huge hit of caffeine. Probably better than a shot. As I brought the cup to my lips, I noticed a small post it note on the saucer. I felt Lizzy's dark BL fan-girl smirk burn through my head. And all the note said was 'Enjoy the caffeine – SM'. …I think Lizzy is totally in love with the initials as her smirk turned to a creepy perverted smile. I couldn't blame her for the perverseness though. I mean, SM? Come on! That is just waiting to be called out for! …

This random guy with the weird initials is going to be on my mind a lot more now thanks to Lizzy…A lot more…

The fake smile was plastered in my brain like the post it to the saucer…

Yep! New Story~! And terrible name, I know. -_- I also think it's grammatically incorrect too...Tell me? XD

Like the smiley separators? XD I was bored, Got an idea, I think this is soooo OOC..I wanted Ciel to remain conceited and haughty and…I dunno really. XD I just wrote this coz I wanted a college themed story. XD I have a heap of steamy one-shots if you want me to upload them too. :))))

Anything I did wrong, tell me. Hate it, tell me. Love it, tell me. I don't care, just review me. :P XDDD I'M A REVIEW WHORE~! XDDD

Oh, and love me SebaCiel fans. ;P XD

If any of my fans are reading this coz I updated something random, don't complain to me on a story you don't like. Go to my profile and vote on my poll. Okay, now bai bai~!

Oh, PS: Yes, I already know this is terrible. -_- I was bored and this has been sittin in my folder for a while. I just decided to finish and upload it now, Kthxbai~! ;P

(Finished: Sunday 1st, January, 2011. Approx: 2:05am
Publish Date: Sunday 1st, January, 2011.)

25/1/12: Structural change to all chapters of all stories.