Well will you look at that, I managed to write something.

This is beyond being overdue. Fucking life guys, right?

Overlooking a household and work is annoyingly time consuming. In the last few years I honestly haven't gotten much done in any department, which is wow, major fucking soul crushing. I've spent the past two years trying to get back to work and okay, yeah, I've made progress, but damn I'm still not back to getting work done. I can't even tell you the last book I read. Do audiobooks count? Hell, I fell asleep so many times during those, probably shouldn't count them then. I've watched a bunch of shows, can't recall them. Been to a few shows, been to the cinema, nope can't recall any of it. I'm sure I've seen some Marvel films. Let's just say I've seen like Avengers or Captain America, those are probably safe bets.

At some point I stopped watching Walking Dead…unless I had stopped before the last update ages ago? I don't know. I've for sure seen an episode or two from recent seasons. I can remember Negan getting glass shard to the throat…fairly certain I saw that entire episode. If it was the last one in the season then yeah, pretty sure I saw the whole thing. Before that…I recall Simon? I know him from Westworld, the actor, so hell I could be wrong about him in Walking Dead. I did a lot of listening to podcast summaries, but it was just one podcast and they stopped watching a few seasons back so since then I've been out of the loop to a major scale.

I know the show has a new showrunner, even though the previous had some title made up for him so he still oversees stuff. Whatever. The small bits I've caught for the current season didn't make me wanna walk off a cliff…that much. I'll totally admit I've seen and read about improvement for the show which is nice. I know what happened to Jesus so fuck those bastards though. But also, hey at least that actor is outta the show now, from what I read he was pleased to be gone, his character wasn't really getting any growth so I'm sure that was frustrating for him. Shame they had to off him to advance the character. Look, I'll raise my hand now and make a promise to not do Jesus dirty like that.

Seeing Morgan over on Fear was nice. I didn't watch that show either after getting frustrated, but did pop in to catch him a few times. I'm just glad they didn't kill the character.

So…since getting back to work has failed for the last couple years and it's just become more depressing as fuck, I wandered back over here to this site and was looking over various stories. Ok, I wandered back like some time last year. I started reading some stories and then like caught up with them, wandered away. This was probably back in maybe June. Came back this week and was looking around again and that old, I don't see the fic I want to read came creeping back. Cue me pulling out the dusty laptop and looking through the files to find this story.

I have a few years' worth of books to read that just keeps piling higher. I want to write original stuff. Wanna get back to work. Wanna keep the house from falling apart. So many wannas and I ain't getting shit done.

Thought on a whim I'd try just jumping back into this and knocking a chapter out. Thought it would be fun. Hell maybe even relaxing in some way. Instead of worrying over trying to adult in life. Gotta admit, it was nice to write this even though it's kept me up to…3am at the moment. Yikes! At least I had fun.

So instead of tearing my hair out over life, I'm gonna try to chill a bit, see if it'll help me be able to get back to work while not completely losing my mind and becoming a drone.

I'm gonna have to go back and read this story so I can figure out where the hell everything is going. I know I had notes written down somewhere that led all the way up to Alexandria, but hell if I know where they are. I wanna say I threw them away in a hissy fit. So yeah, gonna have to read this damn fic over and take notes, knowing my damn ass I'm gonna go back and make edits and rewrites. I'll be smart and make notes of them and then in another AN let you all know what they are so you don't have to go back and read again if you don't want to. Gonna get online and read through the comics again, I stopped reading back at the end of All Out War. I looked up a recent issue from last year and dude, I was so fucking lost and confused! Gotta a lot to catch up on.

And I guess I'll need suck it up and watch what I've missed of the show and probably older episodes so I can pick through what I wanna keep from it and the comics. Pretty sure I've seen the show on Netflix maybe, I'll need to go see if it's on there and add it to my watchlist.

I'll need to prep for the week ahead tomorrow, and catch up on the sleep I'm depriving myself of at the moment. I'll try to get back to the reading over the story tomorrow night and Monday. Tuesday and the rest of the week is gonna be busy for me, oh joy, so what downtime I have I'll use to read the comics through. Next weekend I'll try to watch the episodes from the current time in the story.

I'm gonna hope to get to write the next chapter within the next two weeks. It'll be original stuff so I won't need to read the comics or watch the show, so it shouldn't be too hard to write it out. I did have a wee summary typed out on the laptop so that will for sure help out.

Well, guess I should stop and let you get to reading the actual chapter, huh?

Thanks to all who find their way back here from update notifications or just wandering the section.

Welcome to the newbies. Thanks for checking this out. I appreciate it.

Alana watched, eyes slightly widened, silent as Rick stood forward, back strong and certain. Speaking in a steady tone, speaking her words. Her plan. The eyes of the group passed from him to her, her to him.

"There's a chance that the Governor's men could track Tyreese and Sasha here to the prison. If they do, they'll head back to Woodbury and bring back everything they've got." Rick looked to his side, to Alana. "If the Governor's men find us here, we can't let them get away."

It was an invitation, that look, and Alana knew it. She did her best to keep her eyes from resting on anyone for too long, save Daryl. She didn't dare to even look at him. Couldn't bring herself to, knowing what emotions were raging within at that moment. Worry, anger, defiance. Love. Revenge. Keeping her stare from him, Alana raised her chin. Back strong and certain.

"I have to take a team out to the road to meet them head-on." She could sense as backs stiffened before her. From the corner of her eye, she could see T-Dog nod, about to say something. About to volunteer likely. "There won't be volunteers," Alana announced, her tone final as she swallowed and then wet her lips. "I'm taking Andrea, Lucas, Alice, and Tyreese," she said, nodding at Tyreese lastly.

Alice was visibly shaken, bracing hands on knees. Dale sat with her and calmed her the best he could. Alana apologized to her. "No, no, I…I get it," Alice told her. She gave a weak smile to everyone. "They'll know me, that's it, isn't it?" Alana nodded. "I'll distract them and they'll let their guard down. Then you can…can take them out."

"And why does my brother have to go?" Sasha questioned, angrily. She glared at everyone before settling back on Alana. "Take one of your own people."

Tyreese whispered, hand raised before his sister. "It's alright. I'll be alright." He glanced over the group, a look of reassurance about him, and then turned to speak directly to Alana. "I'll go, if that's what's needed, I'll do it."

Dale asked what the rest of them would do. Rick answered.

"We need to be ready, in case we have to leave." Alana stood back as Rick went over the plans for the cars and packs and sleeping arrangements and every other detail she had thought up on her own.

Daryl was nothing more than a blur at the corner of her vision, but somehow that blur was bristled, sharp. Unnerving. She kept her eyes from drifting over his face as she looked the others over, seeing how they were reacting to what Rick was telling them. But it became harder and harder to ignore Daryl, feeling and knowing he became angrier with each moment that she overlooked him.

Rick was coming to an end of what those left at the prison would have to prepare for. Sasha spoke up again, tone still fierce, demanding answers. "How will we know if things go wrong?"

"The walkies," Alana answered, taking the chance to focus on Sasha. She chose her words slowly. "If things don't go as we plan, we'll radio for everyone here to get out. Try to clear a path for you, hold the line long as we can." For a moment Alana paused, thinking over whether she should say more or leave it at that. In the end she chose to keep speaking. It wouldn't do any good to not admit the severity of the situation. "Might be that no one shows up, no one comes looking. Or maybe a scouting group will find us. Or…they could have already found us and are prepping to head back here with force."

"You'll be going in blind," Rick told the small group that would head out. "But we can't just sit back and wait here, blind is the best option we've got." He cleared his throat, looking over the cafeteria, giving a moment of silence. "Everyone staying back, start packing up your stuff. Those going with Alana hang back here, she'll go over the plan with ya'll," he spoke as he took a step back. As those remaining behind slowly began to rise and make their way out of the cafeteria Rick pointed out individually who would also be in charge of packing medical supplies, food, weapons, everything that could possibly be of use and would fit in the cars. He listed which cars would be best to take, which to strip and abandon there at the prison.

Alana stood back while everyone shuffled past her and Rick, keeping her eyes to the floor ahead of her. It was hitting her. Just how serious this was. How this could all end in the coming hours. The minute relaxation she had felt as Rick had spoken to the group, the weight she had felt raise itself from her shoulders, came pushing back down upon her. Bile rose in Alana's throat. She blinked, once, twice. Meeting the stares of those that remained behind with her, Alana suppressed the growing panic and dread inside of her. Best she could. At least.

She motioned them to circle round one table as she approached it. She chose to remain standing. Alice sat, along with Andrea, Lucas, and lastly Tyreese. A smile, sad as it was, felt wrong on her face at that moment, but still she wagered it felt better than remaining solemn-faced. Thankfully, the others returned her defeated smile and spoke nothing of it. They sat silently, waiting for their marching orders, as it were.

None of them could fight the feeling that they were about to head out to their deaths. Like sending the cavalry out against the war machines. But there was no telling what they would meet out there. Like Alana had already said and thought to herself over and over, maybe they'd meet no one out there on the road. Maybe The Governor and his men had no idea about Tyreese and Sasha. Perhaps they still had no clue about the prison or were it was located. So really, there was no certainty that they were heading out to meet their deaths. Lack of certainty was not a lack of hope. Somehow Alana could sense that everyone felt that.

She began to go over the parts each of them would play that evening out on the road. She spoke of the possible outcomes and what they would be expected to do in each of them. In every scenario Alana reminded them of the threat of walkers. The planning would have been easier to go over and memorize if it wasn't for them. At any given moment the group had to be ready to adapt and compromise for the presence of walkers. All while still keeping their focus on the main task at hand. It became evident to those around the table that the men from Woodbury were not the only major threat at hand. Too much noise would draw walkers and the risk would increase with each one that shambled out to them.

Alana did what she could to reassure her group that things would hopefully work out in their favor, her talk with them coming to close as everyone came to understand what their roles would be, what each would do depending on the various scenarios Alana had prepared for.

"If the Governor knows about us, " Lucas had spoken up, "he'd attack us in the morning or at night. He's organized, we know that. We know what he's capable of." The group agreed.

Tyreese asked Alana how much of Woodbury she had seen when there; how they could be so certain of Woodbury's power. "How far would he go to get back at you?"

She paused before answering, mulling over what she remembered from her escape with Merle. "Their location is more secure than ours. I doubt he'd worry about retaliation from us at Woodbury. We might be able to get closer to them there than they getting to us here, but their numbers are beyond ours. He could empty half the town and still hold us back."

Tyreese nodded slowly, studying the table before looking back up to Alana. "Then we can't just up and leave the road. If any of his guys come this way, we take them out, and then we sit back and wait for more. He's bound to have a check-in system of sorts and when his guys don't come back or check in, he's gonna send more out likely. And we gotta take them out too. Hell," he added, leaning back, "we'll need to ditch their vehicles too."

"Drive them out somewhere, away from us," said Andrea. "Send Woodbury looking in the wrong direction."

Alana was disappointed that they brought it up. She had been hoping none of them would have thought that out. But it was true. She had considered keeping the cars. Woodbury appeared to mainly utilize larger cars and it would have been nice to have one or two for themselves. Keep the group more closely together while out on the roads. But Tyreese and Andrea were right. Keeping any would be too great a risk if they were ever spotted while outside the prison. Of course, that then meant someone would have to ditch the vehicles. Someones. The cars would have to be driven a ways out, left far away enough from the prison. Left in whatever manner would suggest that Woodbury go searching in the opposite direction of the prison.

She was asking…having these people risk their lives already. She didn't want to then have them do it all over again to drive cars out further than they'd gone before. If they survived the first risk that is.

Alice wringed her hands as she suggested they drive the cars away from Woodbury and then circle round, head back out again. Taking any other route would be stupid, they all knew it. For now none mentioned how dangerous it would be to spend such a great deal of time out on the road, necessary as it was.

"When we're comfortable that no one else is gonna come looking in our direction," Alana told them, "we can figure out where to dump the cars."

The group agreed.

They left the cafeteria, having been told by Alana what each needed to pack and stash in which cars. They'd head out in two cars, be dropped off a mile out. The space between would be covered by those at the prison.

The hallway leading outside already had bags and packs lining it as the others staying behind had been quick to gather belongings together. There was a hush over the prison and the people moved about like hurried bees, each intent on their job. Alana focused only on herself. If she dared stop and looked around she knew she'd buckle. Just a flashing thought was too surreal, to think that come this time tomorrow the prison could be long behind them. Or they could be dead. It was a drastic, harsh reality, but it was the truth. A truth that she and no one else could dare let take hold of them.

She made it to her cell, releasing a breath she had been holding at the chance of running into Daryl in there. Without a second thought or moment to relish in the relief of him not being there waiting for her, Alana leaned over and grabbed a pack, taking out whatever she deemed useless to her for that night. She began going through her weapons, checking her ammo, looking through her clothes to choose which layers she'd need. Maggie came by with a bag off food. Snacks. She was taking it to those heading out and having them divide it amongst each other. Alana was grateful that she didn't try to strike up any sort of conversation with her. The more she focused on what she was doing, the better. She needed to keep her head clear.

There was a raised voice here and there as the group called out, signaling that one thing or another was done. The halls echoed with their steps, slowly silencing and rising again. Outside, Axel and Herschel move the cars around, positioning the ones that are to be taken and the ones that will be on standby. In the hallway the packs are separated into groups. A weapon pack, food pack, medical, clothing, emergency packs with a bit of everything. Rick lets everyone know which car they will get in if the need arises. Which packs they are to grab. He goes so far as to assign drivers, even telling the rest where in the cars they are to sit. Once in the cars, everyone has a role to serve. Glenn and Sasha are chosen to remain up in the watch tower. Down at the base of the tower, on the staircase, T-Dog and Rick, along with Carl and Dale, will be at the ready to rush the gates and open them for the cars. The latter grabs the keys to one of the cars, loading the selected packs and driving it up to the watch tower. The trio will jump in it and drive to the gates to open them. Glenn and Sasha will have their packs at the bottom of the staircase and be picked up by Michonne and Axel. In the third car will be Daryl, Merle, Maggie, and Herschel. Rick will lead the group out, Daryl picking up the rear.

Herschel calls out from the bottom floor that he's collected the walkies and is heading out with them to the cars. He already handed out three to Rick, Glenn, and Daryl. Axel has the idea to quickly weld a couple sheets of metal together and leave them near the fencing at the back of the prison. He talks to himself about using them to drive over the barbwire if they need to knock down the fencing and exit that way. He grabs Carl, telling him he's gonna get a crash course in sheet metal.

The process of going through all their supplies and deciding what is essential takes longer than anyone had thought it would, though all are grateful. Alana oversees all of it from afar. A small relief settles when Rick and Andrea approach and tell her that the plan is coming together. Everything is ready; mainly the group is just going over things a second time, making sure they grabbed the right things, left the right things behind. Axel and Merle can be heard in the cafeteria, the latter prepping a lunch meal for everyone. The former giving him grief over his food choices.

Merle still being Merle is a small welcomed relief in a strange way to the group. If they blink slowly enough it's like their world isn't at risk of ending soon.

Alana retreats to the gym as she and the others begin to find themselves mulling about. Calm before the storm. She grimaced slightly at the thought of storms. The cloudless sky outside is comforting. Hopefully that night won't turn into a storm. It'd be the last thing Alana needs. Some fearless leader that'd make her.

The gym is lit up from the sun outside and soon enough Alana's mind has moved past any thought of storms. She sits at the bottom of the bleachers, elbows on her knees as she hunches over, turning a pocketknife from hand to hand. She smiles at the sound of footsteps coming down the hall; she had a feeling Glenn would ask her about doing a little group meal for those heading out, even though he wouldn't be part of it. Of everyone he'd been most taken with the ritual. With how tense the situation was, she thought Glenn would perhaps want to have a group meal before heading out instead of afterwards. Try to cheer them up, it was something she could see him wanting to do. Alana wondered if he had any more Big Red stashed away somewhere.

Her careless wonder abandoned her though as her eyes rose to the doors as Daryl entered. A small panic set inside of her. She knew she couldn't avoid or ignore him, but…she didn't know what to say to him.

Daryl grabbed the door behind him, guiding it to shut softly behind him.

That's a start, Alana thought to herself. No slamming doors. Must be a good sign. Too bad it didn't do anything to calm her nerves.

He heads over to her, head hung slightly, and joins her on the bleachers. As he sits Daryl's shoulder brushes against hers and Alana can't hold back a shudder though the sensation comforts her. He takes a posture similar to hers and looks off across the gym. Alana places the pocketknife away.

She knows he isn't happy with being separated from her. He could easily go with her. He'd be helpful. With what they'd possibly have to do, it was senseless to not take Daryl. But how could Alana do her job if Daryl were right there beside her? He was a distraction and they both knew it. They both knew she'd be a distraction to him as well. They could lose someone because of it. In the moment, who would trump Daryl? No one. Alana's thoughts would not be on the group, not fully. At the back of her mind she'd be thinking of Daryl and making sure he got out of there alive. That thought would threaten the others. It would threaten her.

Daryl had been avoiding thinking of her as he went about following Rick's orders. As he grabbed his pack from the cell, he ignored the thoughts of her. Rifling through their clothes, he ignored her. Knowing she was at the other end of the hall, passing him in the hall, standing around the corner. He ignored every thought of her. A few times Merle had said something to him, but in the moment he couldn't recall what he had spoken. He didn't care. It was likely something about being left behind while his girl went and played soldier, so Daryl didn't care.

But now all the prep work was done. There was nothing to focus on now. Nothing to keep his mind from Alana and how badly he wanted her stay back. To take him with her. To do whatever was needed, just so long as he was with her.

If she didn't come back…

He isn't proud of the thoughts that come floating into his head.

"Ya need to get outta there, if things go to shit," he tells her. He looks down to their feet as he feels Alana shift beside him. She's staring at him and he can feel her shock directed at him. She begins to shake her head. "It all goes south, you get back here."

"The others? What about them? Daryl…" Alana begins, but stops when he finally looks up at her.

"Just get back ta me."

Alana strongly blinks her eyes as she turns away, taking a steady breath. She rubs her palms over her thighs. She'd be a liar if she told him she hadn't thought the same. Abandon the group and get back to the prison. Get back to Daryl.

"Would you?" she asks then. She turns back to him. "Would you leave them behind and come back?" Alana can see that Daryl wants to say yes, yes he would leave Andrea behind. Leave Lucas and Alice and Tyreese behind and come back to her. She wants to tell him that she would leave them behind. But something stops her—the same thing that stops him from telling her yes.

The doubt of whether they could live with themselves after doing so.

Much as Daryl cared about Alana, betraying the group felt like he'd be betraying her as well. Betraying what Wilhelm had died for. For the group. He wouldn't be the same without the group just as he wouldn't be the same without Alana and that there was the crossroads. Daryl couldn't answer what was more important, the individual or the group. Yes, the answer should be the group. The group above all else. The group is what kept them sane. What kept them human. But also…wasn't Alana more important than…Axel? Alice? Didn't she bring more to the group than others? It wasn't pleasant, but some in the group were more useful than others. Daryl didn't know what Tyreese or Sasha could offer. If he had to choose, either of them or Lucas who could fight and hunt, he'd choose Lucas. He'd choose Michonne over Dale. Rick over Michonne. Alana over Rick.

Choosing…what did that make him?

So easily choosing to fracture the group, it did nothing good. If choosing were easy then there was no point to the group.

"Make it back," Daryl settles on telling Alana. "No matter what, just…do ya best to make it back."

Alana looks away for a moment and then smiles at him, nodding. She wets her lips and leans against him, grasping his hand. Daryl eases himself down from the bleachers and onto the floor, gently pulling Alana with him, guiding her to sit in front of him. Alana says nothing as he wraps his arms around her in a nearly too tight an embrace. Her eyes closed, she does her best to rid her mind of all thoughts and relish in the moment.

Maggie comes along after awhile, letting them know that Axel has finished cooking up lunch for everyone. There isn't much talk in the cafeteria as everyone eats. What talk there is dies down as the group finishes eating and leaves, wandering off into their own worlds for the remainder of time before Alana and her group must head out.

The group is spread out across the prison, everyone taking what time is left in the day to calm and prepare themselves. Alana doesn't pay much attention to where everyone has headed off to. Someone is up in the tower keeping watch, Axel, and so she headed to B-block with Daryl to have the next hours alone with him.

She didn't exactly have anything to talk about. Making small talk in this case seemed like an insult and something neither of them would be very good at. Alana had prepared herself to hear more from Daryl about looking out for herself soon as they were out of C-block, but he never said a word.

Walking past the cells, Alana finally settled on one on the bottom floor, just enough sunlight coming through to light it. She went about arranging the mattresses for herself and Daryl before carefully lowering herself. He followed suit and laid behind her on his side, holding her against his chest as she matched the curve of his body with hers. She followed his slowed breathing, letting her eyes drift shut. Somehow she never fell asleep, remaining aware of every moment.

It wasn't until the sun began to set that Alana finally opened her eyes. Daryl guided her up from the mattress, his hands lingering. She stepped away until her back rested against the wall and Daryl followed, pressing his forehead to hers. His eyes were closed as his hands glided over her, fingertips ghosting over where her skin was exposed. Alana caught his sight by chance as he opened his eyes for a moment before tilting her chin up to kiss him. Her fingers curled into his shirt, raising it slightly. At the feel of air on the exposed skin Daryl closed what little space was between them. Her soft sighs into his mouth pressed him on and for a short while the setting sun wasn't so foreboding to them.