Title: Broken Angel
Author: OCDegrassi (Holly)
Pairings: Lucius/Narcissa
Rating: M
Warnings: Violence, Rape, Angst, Abortion
Note: Finally, an update! Again, I'm sorry that it took so long. Special thanks to Beautiful Storm Munroe for the awesome determination to get an update! Thank you so much for your encouragement. Now, onto the next chapter. This chapter contains abortion, which I know can make some people feel very uncomfortable, so I'm sorry in advance if I offend anyone. That was certainly not my intention.

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Madame Pomfrey approached Narcissa with a sympathetic look on her face that made the blonde wary of her intentions. "Dear, I know that you don't remember what happened. There's no easy way to tell you this, but you were sexually assaulted." She placed a comforting hand on Narcissa's shoulders and waited for the blonde's response. She was still and silent, her eyes staring off into space. She knew that she should act surprised, but she just didn't have it in her. Madame Pomfrey waited a few minutes before continuing, obviously disappointed by the teen's lack of response. "We are going to need to do some tests, just to make sure that everything is okay."

Narcissa tensed. The nurse was talking about STD's. She hadn't even thought of that. She suddenly felt sick again and threw up on the floor next to her bed. Madame Pomfrey quickly cleaned the mess up and pressed a cold cloth to her forehead. Why couldn't this just be over? She just wanted to forget, but there was always something to remind her. Madame Pomfrey took some blood from her arm and retreated into her office to analyze it.

The blonde leaned back and closed her eyes, but she quickly opened them when she heard footsteps approaching her. The sudden fear had pulsed through her at the sound, and she was embarrassed when she realized it was only Lucius. Her head knew that she was safe in the infirmary, but her body didn't seem to register that fact. The unseen footsteps had thrown her mind back to the night of her attack. He nodded to her instead of speaking. He seemed to realize by now that asking her how she was feeling was not working well in his favor. They sat in silence until Madame Pomfrey returned with her forehead creased in concern. Narcissa swallowed hard and sat up straighter against her pillow.

"What is it?" Her voice was forceful and hoarse. She didn't want the nurse to beat around the bush; she just needed to know. Madame Pomfrey looked to Lucius as if she was unsure whether to share the information with him present, but Narcissa didn't care. She couldn't wait a minute longer to know. She needed to know so that she could start dealing with whatever it was. "Just tell me." The nurse swallowed hard and sat down on the foot of her bed.

"My dear, you are clear of all STD's, but… you are pregnant." The world slipped out from underneath Narcissa as her breath caught in her throat. This couldn't be happening. Not this; anything but this. She would rather have an STD than this. She was pregnant with that monster's child. She shook her head in disbelief. This had to be a sick joke. "You do have options. You can give the child up for adoption once he or she is born, or you can choose to terminate the pregnancy."

Narcissa answered almost before the nurse had finished her sentence. "I want an abortion."

Madame Pomfrey seemed taken aback by her sudden answer. "Why don't you take some time to think about it?" She said gently, but Narcissa forcefully shook her head.

"There's nothing to think about. I want the abortion. As soon as possible." Madame Pomfrey nodded and walked away, leaving Narcissa alone with Lucius.

"I will support you in anything you decide, but are you sure you don't want to think a little longer before making a decision? I mean, this is your baby…" Lucius trailed off, uncertain of what to say. He didn't want to offend Narcissa, and he certainly couldn't blame her for wanting an abortion, but he didn't want her to make a mistake. What if she realized after the fact that she wanted her child, regardless of whom the father was, or she felt guilty for 'killing' her own kid and couldn't survive with the guilt weighing down on her conscious? He would never forgive himself if he didn't at least try and make sure that she was completely positive about her decision.

Tears began to spill down her cheeks before she could stop them. "This is my baby… and his. I can't have this baby. I can't look at him or her every day and see him; see a monster. I know that I should love my child, but how can I when it was created in hate? I know that makes me a terrible person, but I just can't." Her voice broke as she sobbed. Lucius pulled her close to him, and she continued to cry into his chest.

"You are not a terrible person. You went through something horrible, and you have every right to not want a child that was conceived because of it. I understand, and I'm not judging you. I'm here for you, and I'm not going anywhere." This only made her sob harder. Why did she do to deserve his support? She had gotten herself raped and now she was having an abortion. She felt like a horrible person. Her tears finally subsided when she felt like she had no more tears left to cry, but she didn't move from his embrace until Madame Pomfrey returned.

"Are you ready?" Narcissa nodded and wiped her eyes.

"Yes."

She was surprised by how quick and easy the abortion was. Madame Pomfrey gave her a potion to drink, and then she experienced some cramping for about an hour, but that was it. For some reason, she thought it would be harder to kill an unborn child. By the time it was done, she felt number. It was tougher emotionally than she could have ever imagined. She kept second-guessing herself and wondered if the baby was in pain. She felt so guilty. She wished she could be a better person; a better mother. She wished she could have this baby without constantly be reminded of the rape, but she couldn't. She wasn't strong enough, and it made her feel ashamed.

Her guilt and sadness began to mix with anger. This wasn't fair. None of this should be happening. She should have never been in the position to make this decision in the first place. She was angry at her attacker, but she was also angry at herself. She kept wondering if maybe she could have escaped if only she had fought more, or if only she had never left the club. She just wanted to go back in time and change things. As she wrestled within her own mind, Lucius held her hand and never let go.

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A/N: So what did you think? Please Review! I'll give you a giant chocolate chip cookie :)