A/N: It was a bad night for me. I wrote it out so I didn't act it out. I love this ship and all that they are/could be. I own nothing, though. Hope you enjoy!

"Are you coming to bed?"

It's in his voice and she can hear it. The 'are you okay' that he wants to ask but won't because he's afraid that she'll flip a shit on him. She wishes that she could blame him.. but she can't. He's been nothing but good to her the past six months and she's been shit. It didn't help that the hospital still uses them for fuel in the gossip mill, what with Derek and Addison renewing their vows and trying to get pregnant. Why they didn't move back to New York or try somewhere new..

His arms are wrapping around her, pulling her back to now and anchoring her to reality. She lets out the breath she was holding, leaning back against him. The scabs on her left arm rub against his bare arm and she starts to pull it against her, only to have him take her hand and hold it between his. She wants to jerk away from him, tell him to fuck off and let her thoughts pull her down in the deep dark blue but she knows better. Plus, the hospital and its mandated therapy would stick her on mental leave if she pulled another stupid stunt.

"It's noisy," she manages on a half-sigh.

"What can I do?" His breath tickles her ear and she closes her eyes, letting the shiver dance deliciously down her spine as he starts to rock them side to side.

"It's dark," she mutters before forcing her eyes open, straining to see out the window above the sink. She knows the backyard like the back of her hand but ever since she bit a little too deep with the knife she can't stand it. The dark. It swallows her whole and refuses to spit her out.

"I can fix that." He kisses her shoulders where her Dartmouth shirt has slipped down, releasing his hold on her to step towards the back door. Within moments the backyard is lit up with the several flood lights he installed and he's coming back to stand behind her. "Better?"

"Mom would hate it," she laughs shakily, welcoming the touch of his hands as he takes her in his arms again.

"If your mom wasn't on the list before, she is definitely on it now."

She can't stop the laughter that bubbles out of her lips now, pressing herself against him as she nods. Him and his list. She wasn't sure whether she wanted to hit or kiss him, though judging by the way her insides felt she was leaning towards the latter. He had started the list the second night they hung out down in the pit, forced together by poor choices on both their parts. Him following the woman he loved and her falling for the wrong man. She swallows hard, shakes her head and tilts her head against his chest to look up at him.

"We should move." She's suggested this before, moving away and starting over but there's things and people keeping them there and neither of them had it to actually follow through. "Somewhere it never rains, far away from Seattle."

"Texas," he offers immediately and they're back to the same game as usual.

She crinkles her nose, shakes her head as she rolls her eyes and resists the urge to slap his arm. "I do not want an accent or a Texas cowboy."

"Oh," he draws out the word and his lips lift up in a smile, she knows exactly where he's suggesting next. "LA."

"So I can laze around on the beach all day and wear nothing but a bikini?" She shakes her head again, poking him underneath his chin. "Don't think so, Romeo."

"Spoilsport," he huffs before giving her a quick squeeze, continuing to rock them side to side. "Pick a state, any state, and we'll go. Wherever you want."

"What about Paris?" Her eyes flutter close, their game over now as she suggests something new and lets her imagination run away. "I failed French but I think I could remember the basics."

"Paris, huh?" She can feel his shoulders shrug behind her as he rests his chin on top of her head. "Not exactly a state but I think I could get used to that. Would you learn the other basics, too?"

The way his voice dips low and becomes husky lights her stomach on fire with butterflies as she fights the grin that's trying to break out on her lips. She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, scrunching her nose up. "You, Dr. Sloan, are never going to be allowed to give our children the 'talk'. We'll make Izzie do it."

"I think if I help create the little boogers and raise them, I should get to ruin them too." There's the slightest of pout in his voice and she fights the urge to giggle.

"They're already going to have everything working against them," she reasons. "Dark and twisty from the mom and an ex-manwhore as a daddy? Poor things."

"Good point," he says seriously, leaving her to turn and thump him on the upper arm as she scoffs at him.

"You weren't supposed to agree with me!" Meredith shakes her head and maneuvers away from his arms that are reaching for her, taking a few steps back to jump up on the counter. "You were supposed to assure me that they'd be fine and have none of our flaws."

"But you think that adorable little nose scrunch you do is a flaw," Mark points out as he steps forward to stand between her legs. "On the other hand I think it is absolutely adorable and if our daughter ever does it, I'll be putty in her hand."

"You'll be putty in her hand no matter what cause you're a big softy." She smirks, leaning her forehead against his as she puts her arms around his neck.

"That may be," he shrugs before putting his hands on her hips.

It's quiet for a few minutes, the house settling around them as their normal routine comes to a close. She feels a little better than before and she knows that he can tell. His thumbs are rubbing small circles against the exposed skin above her hips and she can't help but let out a soft sigh.

"Quieter?" He whispers, careful of breaking the fragile bubble he knows they're in.

"For now," she confirms with the smallest of smiles before she kisses him gently on the corner of his mouth. "Take me to bed?"

"Always," he grins and gives her a wink before scooping her up into his arms effortlessly, stopping briefly by the back door to flip the lights off before heading towards the stairs.

"I love you, Mark Sloan." She whispers into his neck, her eyes already slipping close as she let her mind shut itself down.

"I love you too, Meredith, dark twisties and all."