Author's note: This snippet is not from one particular character's point of view; it's what the prisoners are thinking, be it Hogan, his core gang, or the guys in the background. Because let's face it, as fanfiction writers and readers we all had those moments where we pictured what might have been if [insert choice here] – and I plead guilty as charged, seeing the snapshot I committed back in July.

Disclaimer: I own the complete HH DVD boxed set, and I'm still gleefully happy about being able to shift both audio track and subtitles from English to French and vice versa – and being at least able to understand all the one-liners! But apart from that, it's all CBS and Bing Crosby's.

Stalag by Starlight

6. Almost

They all have their own personal nightmares, war-related or not; they're all soldiers, even though a lot of them didn't choose to be before war broke out and they were called up to fight. Anyone in camp who could state with absolute truthfulness that so far he hasn't lost a comrade or a friend would either be a liar, insanely lucky, or the most friendless man on Earth.

But what usually brings on these nightmares – what makes them wake up in a cold sweat, heart pounding, or stare up at the ceiling or the bed above theirs for hours, eyes wide open in the dark, with memories, thoughts and emotions jumbled together in their minds – is the almosts. The could-have-beens.

Not the happy kind.

If that bomb had been just three seconds early …

If that bullet had struck just that little bit deeper …

If Hochstetter's Gestapo superiors had paid attention to his ramblings for once …

If that crazy plan had not worked precisely when it did …

Usually, the natural follow-up to this kind of thought is, "We'd all be dead by now". Or, "Operations would shut down and half the guys would be shot – maybe even me".

More often than not, though, the next part is, "I would have lost a good friend".

Nobody brings up the insomnia and the nightmares after an 'almost'. They don't have to – everybody's thinking the same thing. It could have been me. It could have been him, or them. It could have been all of us. And although the last two definitely crop up most often, it's a rare man who can in all honestly say which one he fears the most.

The other thing no-one talks about after an 'almost' is the fear that, one of these days, they will run out of 'almosts'. Karma turns bad. Luck runs out.

They all hope or pray as hard as they can that the war will end before their luck does.

I'm still slowly working on a couple of stories, word after word, including a one-shot which hopefully will see the "light" of the archive before next year. I'm keeping my fingers crossed :o)