Author'sNote:And here's part 2 with my oh-so-original-though-probably-not theory of Leah's origins. :D Also I'm on a business trip in Boston... I shouldn't be up... oh well.

Part II: Another Start of Forever

Years passed, and Loki grew as children – even gods – tended to do. By the time he was a young man, he was all lean muscles and deft fingers that wove strands of magic with nearly as much ease as in prior lifetimes. A simple gold band was nestled in his raven black hair. His keen emerald-green eyes rarely missed anything. If Loki feared that age would turn him back to the monster he was in past lives he needed only to look to his brother to see the fierce pride in Thor's eyes, and his heart was once more at peace.

Slowly and somewhat grudgingly, the other Aesir came to accept him. Trust remained strained – and would for another lifetime or two Loki figured – but he could walk the halls and gardens without fear, even speak with some in a kindly manner. The Warriors Three were better to him than even their oath demanded, and Sif had become almost like a big sister. He would have to ask Thor when that would become official.

Still he never forgot her.

Once every year since her departure, Loki journeyed to Hel. He brought her gifts. The first year it was the rose pot from her room in Asgard, though Loki quickly discovered that flowers did not fare well in Hel. Later it was various trinkets from his adventures. He spoke of those though Leah never faced him and rarely said anything. Hela tolerated this as long as Loki did not overstay his welcome.

But as yet another of such anniversaries approached, the young god found himself at a loss. His brother looked on in amusement, arms crossed over his chest, as Loki rummaged through the 'perfectly organized' mess of his chimers. Finally he sank onto one of the cushions with a heavy sigh.

"I don't know what to bring," he confessed.

"Are you obligated to bring anything? It is not truly her name day." Thor idly traced a path in the dust of one of the thick tomes with his finger.

"And 'Leah' is not likely truly her name," Loki pointed out. "But details like that matter as little as the actual day we choose to celebrate. She is my friend. That's the only part I care about."

"She was your friend," his brother corrected gently. "The dead and the living..."

"She's not dead!" Loki repeated for what he felt like the hundredth time over the years. "Why does no one understand that?"

Thor gave him a look. "If she is not, why do you suppose she is in Hel?"

"I don't know!" The youth threw up his hands in frustration. "She's loyal. To Hela. Blindly, stupidly loyal, but," he sighed, "I suppose some might consider it an admirable quality."

His brother's frown deepened. "What did you say?"

Loki blinked. "I only meant..."

"You said she remains out of loyalty. And you said 'Leah' is not truly her name?"

"I highly doubt that. Think about it: 'Leah'... 'Hela'..."

He could tell Thor wasn't listening any more; he was thinking. Being a good brother, Loki offered to help.

"Thor? What is it?"

The thunderer peered at him in a funny way that made Loki wonder whether or not he was seeing him or someone else in his place. He had received far too many such looks from the other citizens of Asgard. Seeing it from Thor was not pleasant at all, even if there was no malice in his brother's gaze.

"Might you consider postponing your trip for a day?" the older god finally asked.

"Why?" Loki frowned.

"I have a... suspicion."

"Care to share it, brother?"

"No," Thor pushed himself off of the wall he was leaning against. "Not until I am certain. I do not wish to concern you if it is not so."

Loki's eyes followed him all the way to the door, but right before he left, the youth called out to him. "It's about my old self, isn't it?"

Thor paused, sighing heavily. "It is nothing... bad, Loki."

Laughter so bitter he didn't think it possibly to have come out of his mouth, rang through the room. "Oh, my dear brother. Have we not established ages ago what an awful liar you are?"

For the most part the other gods feared Hela. They would say they hated her, but Thor knew better. One had no more reason to hate the keeper of the dead than to curse the seasons for changing. Death was a fact of life. Cursing the goddess would change nothing. In fact when asked, many would grudgingly admit that Hela's sense of duty to her charges was admirable.

While in his youth he feared her as much as any, in recent times Thor had come to respect the goddess. Now, however, he was angry. Angry enough to storm past Tyr at the gates, hand tightly griped around Mjolnir's handle as if he meant to actually use it. He was not entirely sure that was not the case. It depended on what Hela had to say.

"Why?" His fury boomed through her audience chamber like righteous thunder. "How?"

The goddess was unmoved, not bothering to rise. "I do not appreciate this, Odinson."

"No?" Thor demanded. "Perhaps you might like to inquire as to how much I appreciate your interference with members of my family. You will find my tolerance for such games slim. How dare you hold her prisoner here?"

"She is not a prisoner," Hela replied calmly. "She has always been free to go at will but chooses not to. Little wonder, considering how your brother oft behaves."

"But you admit she does not belong in Hel." The goddess' lack of denial surprised him almost enough for some of the anger to fade. Thor glared at her. "How did she come to be here to begin with?"

"That is a question better addressed to you, thunderer." But she did not sound angry. More than anything Hela seemed... tired. She sighed and rose from her throne of stone. "Do you recall after the last and final Ragnarok when you brought all of us back from nothingness?"

He did, but Thor had no memory of seeing her then. He'd been so consumed with the burden of rule, then Balder, then exile, searching for Sif, dealing with Loki, the Siege... There had just been so much! Hela could no doubt see it all on his face; he had never been good at hiding his thoughts of feelings.

"She came to me," the goddess went on. "After everything Loki had done, she could not bare to be by his side anymore, but nor could she stand against him with the rest of Asgard. It is in her nature: loyalty. She chose to serve at my side because death is nothing if not impartial."

"But she was not..." Thor was at a loss for words.

"No, she was not as she is now," Hela agreed. "She was a woman in full possession of every painful memory, every hurt she had suffered in Asgard. I can relate to that. And then one day... one day when she did not come when summoned, I went to seek her out. In the place of a woman I had come to know stood a little girl with no knowledge of who she was or why she was here."

"That must have been when I returned my brother from the great beyond," Thor spoke without looking at her. "A bond such as that... so strong it transcends space and time and death..."

"The reason did not concern me," Hela told him. "I cared for her, taught her magic, gave her my name. In both lives she proved to be a loyal and capable attendant. Duty gave her purpose."

"That does not make this right!" Thor objected. "Any of it!"

"Would it be right to give her back to Loki?" Hela countered. "So he might torment her for another endless lifetime?"

"He is nothing like he was! Regardless of their history, they are friends now, and she does not belong here." He turned to go. "Loki will come tomorrow. You are right, Hela: it should be her choice, but it is a choice she should make with full knowledge. I will accept nothing less."

But when he returned to Asgard, doubt began to creep in. Just what was he supposed to say to Loki? How was he to speak of this, to explain to his little brother who wanted nothing more than to distance himself from offences of the past. Sif watched as he paced the length of the empty great hall. Her steady calm soothed him without the woman having to utter a single word.

"How am I to tell him?" the thunderer ran a hand though his hair after passing the tale along.

"With care," Sif replied wryly. "But you must. He is near the age of adulthood, and so far you have both been able to prevent history from repeating itself yet again. It will be near impossible if you are not honest with him."

Being in Asgard's library surrounded by scrolls and leathery tomes that smelled of age and mold brought the teen comfort. It was a trait he shared with his prior incarnation, but one of the few he did not mind. Where they differed was that in the past, Loki might have had a few choice words upon finding his brother in said room when he entered.

Young Loki simply raised a brow. He might have had a witty remark on hand but that fell away when he saw the look on Thor's face. Loki froze at the entrance.

"Thor?" He took a step closer.

His brother raised blue eyes to him, and Loki could not quite tell what the look was. Sadness? Pity? Whatever it was he didn't like it at all. Loki had never seen him like this. He almost seemed... shaken. The thunder god swallowed hard and nodded at the door.

"Close the door please, little brother."

"Alright." He did slowly. "Have you... is this in regard to your... suspicion?"

"Aye." Loki supposed that it proved true. His brother picked for a book set aside on the shelf ladder and extended it to him. "You should go to your friend, Loki. Give her this. I know you were searching for a gift in any event."

"What is it?" the younger god took the thick tome.

"Something... someone we both forgot about," Thor's response was oddly cryptic. "Though my fault far outweighs yours."

"That must be a first. And the nine realms still stand?" Loki quipped. His brother did not bite though, so his own expression turned serious. "Might I know what is in it? In case Leah asks for an explanation."

That was doubtful as she had never even looked at any of his gifts in his presence. He wasn't entirely sure she didn't dispose of them as soon as he departed. Thor did smile then, but even that was obviously sad.

"I left a mark for you." He nodded at the red silk ribbon that hung from between the pages. "A braver man would tell the tale, but I cannot find the words. I hope you forgive me, brother."

Thor left him with those cryptic words, so Loki did the only thing he could: he sat down amidst the piles of other books and read. He read until his eyes burned and the letters before him blurred. When Loki barely caught a single droplet before it could splash the fragile paper, he closed the book.

Then he went to see Leah.

No, that was not her name. If he had only suspicions before, now Loki had facts. How could he expect her to recall her name day when the true name itself was lost to the winds of time? Their predicaments may have seemed similar, but at least he knew who he was.

Ikol sat silent on the ledge of a library window. Loki glared at the bird.

"You should have told me." But there was little force in his voice.

The bird said nothing and took off into the night.

This time when he went down to Hel, Loki saw no one. No Tyr, no Hela to give him looks of cold disapproval. His path to Leah was entirely unhindered. He wondered if he might see her differently now that he knew the truth, but when Loki laid eyes on the-now young woman, he felt little shift. She was, as ever, a friend to him.

"How fairs the lovely Leah this day?" She didn't answer, but he really didn't expect her to. Loki cleared his throat. "I've brought you a gift. A book I found most... enlightening. Might you consider reading? It would give us something to talk about when next I come."

No answer, and Loki decided it was time to drop the charade. "I will go, but I do beseech you to look at the pages marked. Our childhood is over. I know it now. Whatever happens next is in your hands, Leah, but I would not have you make that choice in ignorance."

He placed the book on a table next to her bed and left without another word.

In Asgard, he sought out his brother. Thor and Sif were in the great hall speaking in hushed tones which stopped all together when he entered. The warrior woman looked at him with the same sad look his brother had given. He hated it. Loki reached for Thor's goblet and took a long deep gulp. His brother only raised a brow at this.

"You rarely partake in drink."

"Of the intoxicating verity," the youth agreed and tipped the cup so that Thor might see what remained. "I am, however, quite fond of the Midgardian drink known as soda."

"I lament the loss of my mead," Thor said wryly before his face turned serious. "How do you fare, Loki?"

"As well as can be expected upon learning that my friend is really my long-lost wife, except not really due to the messy thing known as reincarnation." He took another drink. "At least I am glad to learn she is not really dead. I was starting to have doubts."

"Loki." It was Sif who spoke. "Do not be angry with your brother. He did not mean to keep the truth from you."

Keeping truths... It sounded so strangely familiar, an echo from another life. It made Loki's blood boil, but Thor was not his target. How dare history put them in this predicament again?

"You did not know," he told Thor. "And once you did, you kept nothing from me. I hold no grudge against you but I would have us speak. What was she like? This woman I was once wed to? Was she like Leah?"

"They are as much alike as you are with your prior life."

"Well, that is not very comforting." Loki crossed his arms.

"I meant," Thor corrected, "is that you share certain traits. As she was before, she was kind, gentle, and loyal to a fault."

"To her husband." It was still somewhat difficult to associate himself and Leah to those other people. "For which most did hold her at fault, no doubt. And Leah is hardly gentle."

"But we are not among them," Sif replied to the previous statement. "She was in an extremely difficult position, and yet remained as she was: brave and unbroken. I admire her courage."

"As do I." His brother agreed. "The impact of the past can be neither denied nor ignored, but you have each carried the best of what you once were into this life. I would see you both happy."

"I as well." Loki drew a breath. "I am simply not certain her happiness lies with me."

He greeted the morning not in his chambers but outside on the grassy fields insight of both the cities of the gods and men. The sun was warm on his face, and the light breeze that blew through his hair felt perfect. Loki found himself strangely at peace and closed his eyes.

He only opened them when a feather-light touch brushed at his hair. A few strands that had grown a bit long escaped from his crown, and Loki reached up to move them out of his eyes. Instead his hand was caught by another. He looked up. Leah was standing over him. She looked the same, but he thought her complexion was just a shade more alive than before.

"I'm not her," were the first words out of her mouth. "The woman in your book."

"I know," he said carefully. "I am not who her husband was. I try very hard not to be him."

She seemed to be thinking about those words, lips pressed into a thin line. Then the young woman slowly nodded. "Hela told me everything. I asked, and she swore she held nothing back."

"Hela is... honorable." He almost hated forcing those words out, but they were true. "I have no doubt her actions were meant for your protection."

"Is she right?" Leah raised one dark elegant brow. "Do I need protection from you, Loki?"

"No," he said quickly. "Not as I am now."

"And what are you now?"

It was a trick question. He'd dealt out his own fair share that he knew one when he heard it. Slowly the young man rose and took both of her hands in his. They must have been quite a sight on that grassy hill. It would have been almost romantic if it were not for his next words.

"I'm your friend." He said honestly. "Which, given history, seems a far better alternative to 'husband'. Not that 'husband' is an entirely unfavorable title... for the far future."

Leah rolled her eyes. "And what in the nine realms makes you think I would ever have you?"

Loki grinned. "I can be very charming. Stay, and you'll see." His expression turned serious suddenly. "Can you? Stay, that is? Has Hela..."

"Released me. She said that if I chose to depart, I would not see her halls again until my time came." She at him very seriously. "I hope you will not make me regret that choice."

"I will do my utmost best." Loki inclined his head and pressed his lips against her knuckles. "I have missed you, L..."

Her fingers pressed against his mouth to silence him.

"My name," breathed the young woman, "is Sigyn."