AUTHOR NOTE:

Hallo people of FanFiction :D This is my first ever FanFic and I wanted it to be about something that im really addicted to at the moment... so I now bring you some MelloXMatt goodness that I had been writing for sometime noww...

Please review and tell meh what ya think? I know its gonna be pretty crap but lets just see how it goes shall we?

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Death Note or any of the characters used... Mello does. (Including Matty) O_o

Enjoyy! ^^

Mello's P.O.V

It all started in Wammys house.

I wanted to forget how I got here, forget what I did, lie until I didn't need to lie anymore. I just went by what they told me. They thought I was stupid. They thought that a blond haired, blue eyed, monster boy' would find no interest in the events that were to shape the rest of my life entirely. This day would ruin my train of thought for the rest of my life.

And I nearly died when they found out the truth.

I was 14. And I was studying for the up-coming Mid-Term exam I had, studying so hard for what I believed to be the only refuge I would ever have - becoming the successor to the great detective L. He was someone who I looked up to more than anyone. I had sworn to myself that I was to beat that albino kid 'Near' in order to get what I wanted. I was spoiled that way. I suddenly heard a knock at the door, and I quickly went to open it. It was Roger.

Ah God how I hated him so much.

"Mello, I need you to come with me a second, its important..." I became quickly intrigued as to what he was going to say.

"Well why don't you just tell me. I'm kinda busy right no-"

"NO MELLO. Its to do with your parents... passing."

By the time he had finished his sentence I had already dropped my 'Quadratic functions' text book and stepped out the door, tears welling in my eyes at the mere mention of my parents. He led me to his office. I stood still, waiting for him to start, for which I spoke.

"Listen, if you were doing this just to wind me up, you picked a pretty shit time to do it, I've got Mid-Terms coming up and I refuse to -"

I was cut off by a stern look in Roger's face. It scared me a little - back to when I used to get scared easily, when I used to wish that my mum would suddenly come out from behind my bedroom curtains in my room during my nightmares, and send me to sleep.

I was a lonely child, who used to have nightmares about stuff I couldn't remember. People were always so distant of me when ever I used to go outside, and they always made sure that they stayed friendly until I disappeared. I hated it, the fact that I wasn't allowed to hear the hurtful things that everyone said about me looking like a girl, or the fact that I take pride in looking my best. In truth, I needed someone to love me as much as I wanted to be loved my everyone.

I was never loved.

And I thought I was never going to be loved for my whole life...

"Mello..." Roger began. "I think its time that you finally learn the truth as to why your here. Your old enough now to deal with i-"

"WHAT? YOUR FREIKIN TELLING ME NOW?"

I found myself strangling him there on the spot - with all the pain and the hurt raging through my tense body as I quickly let my emotions get the better of me, tears poring down my eyes. After 5 seconds I regrettably loosened my hands and let Roger talk.

"Gahh, Mello, I wish you wouldn't do that..."

"Well HOW THE FUCK am I supposed to fucking respond to something like this, something that I have been questioning for the whole time I've been here? I can't fucking always be like Near and just stay calm and use my head. Its like he's not even human..."

I felt the tears come back, but tried to hold them - I refused to become an emotional wreck in front of Roger.

He continued.

"Just be quiet. I'm very sorry to report this to you Mello, but... your parents were killed by a killer that you have known your whole life. By someone who you know better then all of us do, someone-"

He didn't need to say the rest. I wasn't second best for nothing.

I felt regret as I listened, knowing full well what he was about to say, wondering what on earth convinced him to tell me the truth about my parents - knowing full well what had happened, was just too real. They called me 'Monster child' for a reason. My heart ached.

"You killed them Mello. YOU."

There was silence for about 30 seconds, followed by a brief awkward cough, and then I spoke.

"I don't deserve to live. I don't deserve anything. I don't deserve to die."

And with that, I ran out of the office. I had lost the will to live.

That night I had nightmares. Nightmares of the most disturbing kind, the ones that could make you hurl if you tried to recreate them. I suddenly woke up, feeling weak at the knees and dizzy. I reached out for my stash of chocolate that I always kept for emergencies like this, tore the wrapper off and took a deep bite into the brown, blissful shape. I felt a bit better, but not even chocolate could take away the pain of what I had happened the previous evening. But I needed something that could.

I awoke from my scrambled thoughts, to something completely unexpected.

Roger was standing at the side of my bed, waiting for me to wake up. I took one look at him, and shook my head.

"Fuck off old man, I don't need you to tell m-"

"I'm not here about that Mello. I'm here to inform you of a specific change we will be making to your sleeping arrangements..."

Suddenly, a random boy came in from the open door - he looked very strange - goggles, a stripy T-shirt, Red hair... who was this guy?

"Who's this kid?" I sat up and flung my chocolate bar wrapper from the previous night into the bin as I said it.

"This is Matt, he will be sharing your room from now-on." He then spoke faster and moved swiftly to the right, to avoid any chance I'd have to go for his neck again.

"Please try and be understanding Mello, Matt has no-where else to go since his parents died, and everyone else has a roommate..."

"Well what about Nears room? He has no roomma-"

"He needs his privacy - He's the number one here at wammys, and he needs all the room he can get..."

"Oh well, I don't want a fucking roommate..."

"I'm not asking Mello."

Roger turned around and headed for the door. Matt put down his suitcase next to the spare bed across the room and flung himself on the white bed sheets, pulling out a DS and starting to play the games he knew too well.

"ROGER I HATE YOU"

Roger looked back, and went out of the room.

I had hated him even more for that.

An awkward silence filled the room, as the blackness inside me continued to melt my heart.

"So" I said finally said sharply - with hatred in my voice. "Matt was it? Let me just get something very clear in that gamer head of yours... You are to stay clear of me at all times, not talk to me, not look at me, not to ask questions, and above all - STAY AWAY FROM MY CHOCOLATE..."

He didn't even flinch. He just nodded and continued playing his game.

I felt annoyed. I felt angry. I felt depressed - so much so that I wanted to die, but death was too good for me.

He then looked up. He stared at me nearly to breaking point - making me even more angry, and just smiled.

"You know, you can tell me what's up, I am your roommate now after all..."

"But I've only met you for 5 seconds, and you expect me to tell everything to you right this second?"

I couldn't hold it any longer. I broke into a million pieces and the flood of tears took over my face in a hot, red fury.

Minutes passed before either of us said anything, for I was facing the floor, letting my tears take over my mind completely.

Then a remarkable thing happened.

Matt walked over to where I was sitting. He suddenly swallowed me in an embrace that I was too upset not to take. This was the first time a person had ever hugged me. I was liking the warmth of his arms and chest, as he clenched his arms around my body. I felt a new feeling take over me, the feeling, of happy ness?

He let go of me and looked into my icy blue eyes, as I hesitantly dropped my arms around him.

"You can tell me anything."

A slight blush danced along my pale white cheeks. I jolted my head down to try and hide it. I hadn't felt like this before, a sea of new emotions replacing the old ones of depression, jealousy and anger - with hope, honesty and love.

But why with this guy?

FLUFFEH XD

Yep, that's it for now :D

I promise that I shall have chapter 2 up before the end of this week.

Might have lemonz in it, might not - depends what you guys want ^^

PLEASE REVIEW - IT'L MAKE MEH SO HAPPY