Through A Glass Darkly

Chapter One: A Broken Bird

A/N: Warning! This fic is going to be based partially on the fairy tale 'The Princess in Disguise/Princess of the Thousand Furs'. It will contain scenes of child abuse-mental, physical (sexual as well), and verbal-as well as implied scenes of rape. If any of that makes you uncomfortable: Do Not Read this. I'll try to have the worst moments happen 'off-screen', though.

*Bianca Case's Journal. Date: July 12, 2012.*

Dear Journal,

I trust you to keep my secrets, as you have always done. When I finish writing, I'll hide you under the floor so Father cannot find you and get angry with me. Father was angry with me today because I wore a pair of jeans to school, even though I told him I would be uncomfortable in a dress. But Father would not listen, and he gave me 'the belt.' Journal, I hate the belt. It's so hard and sharp, and Father doesn't stop until I'm bleeding. Then again, I am a very naughty girl for disobeying a direct order given to me by Father, and must be disciplined severely.

Still, the belt is better than the things Father makes me do at night, when he comes into my room. He tells me he's only doing it because I remind him so much of Mommy-who I can barely remember (Father says I have the same deep green eyes and dark red hair that she had)-but I don't think that's true. It hurts me, it hurts me a lot, but the one time I tried to fight him, he beat me really badly then locked me in the hall closet for three days. I was so scared, and Father wouldn't even give me any food. He just kept yelling that I was an 'ungrateful bitch' who should 'appreciate all that I do for you.' Journal, I would believe that more if Father didn't use all the money he's earned to buy his cheap booze-or, more accurately, making me buy his cheap booze.

On a happier note: Ruby is going to have a baby! She was always so nice to me when we were kids, and now she's going to have one of her own! And Gold's, no less! Father wouldn't hear of me attending the wedding, even though Ruby sent me an invitation. He said that I should not be associating with 'a person of loose moral character', but I think the real reason is because he's absolutely terrified Gold will somehow find out what he's been doing behind closed doors. Secret admission time: How hot is Gold? I mean, I know he's like, old (I think he's forty-seven), but that accent of his, and the way he carries himself…*Swoon*. If I didn't love Ruby like a sister, and was a few years older, I'd be hella jealous of her.

I hope I get asked to baby-sit; I think I'd be really good with kids.

Oh, and you'll never believe what I found out today! Well-two awesome things happened. First, Mr. Horner tells me after class that he wants me to try out for the part of Hermia in Midsummer! I was so happy, since she's such an awesome character to play. I only hope Father will let me. Acting is my dream, and I think I'd be really, really good at it.

The second thing is even more amazing: Peter Wolf asked me out! I was shaking so hard when he asked me, since I was so sure it was a really bad joke(Peter is, no lie, the second most hot guy I've ever seen) but he told me that he thought I was, and I quote: 'A really cool person.' I told him I'd have to ask Father for permission. (But I already know the answer…*Pout*)

Well, Father's car just pulled up, so I'll have to hide you now, Journal. Thank you for listening to me.

P.S: Happy Fifteenth birthday to me!

Bianca stuffed her pink notebook underneath the loose floorboard under her bed, and then quickly headed downstairs to the kitchen. Father would want to have his cup of coffee right away, and experience had taught her that if she was one second late, that was a good way to get scalding hot coffee tossed at her. "Bianca! Where's my coffee? !"

"It's coming, Father. I just need to pour it." She carefully poured the coffee into his red ceramic mug, added exactly one level spoonful of sugar and exactly two dribbles of milk, and then just as carefully carried the coffee out to the living room, where her father was sitting. Dexter Case was a tall, broad man with dark brown hair and eyes. Bianca set the coffee down on the table, making sure to avoid eye contact. That was the Big Rule in the Case home-Do not look at Father unless he gives you permission.

"Bianca?" Mr. Case's voice was soft, and Bianca went cold. "Bianca, are you so woefully ignorant that you are unable to remember a coaster?"

Bianca trembled, trying to speak. "I…I'm so sorry, Father! I'm so sorry, I just forgot, it won't happen again, please don't be mad at me! Please…" she was cut short by a ringing slap to the face.

"Quit your sniveling, you worthless little bitch! God, you are such a fucking burden! You…worthless…slut!" He slapped her down, and Bianca threw her arms up over her face, whimpering and sobbing. As suddenly as the beating began, it was over, and Case was kneeling next to her, anguish in his voice. "Oh darlin', you know I don't like having to discipline you. Father loves you, you know he does. It's just-you gotta learn who the master of the house is, Bianca. Do you love Father, Bianca?"

Bianca looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "Yes, Father. I love you. I should not have disobeyed."

"That's my good girl. Don't let it happen again, okay?"

"I won't, Father. May I go outside for a bit?"

Case frowned. "Well, okay, but stay in the back yard. I don't want any of those boys from the high school ogling my little girl."

Bianca went outside and sat on the porch swing, rocking back and forth. She wished that she had been able to say what was in her heart-that she did not love her father, but hated him more deeply than she could ever hate a person. She wanted to scream, and cry, and claw him while demanding answers. Why her? Why did she have to look so much like her long dead and scarcely-remembered mother? Why did that give Father the right to make her do those horrible things?

"BIANCA!" Her father's angry shout broke through her thoughts, and she went into the house. Mr. Case was standing by the phone, an ugly expression of disbelief and rage on his face. "Bianca, your drama teacher just called me. Apparently, you are being asked to take part in a play. Is that true?"

Bianca trembled, nodding. "Yes, Father. Mr. Horner is putting on A Midsummer Night's Dream, and he wants me to be Hermia. I'd…I'd be the main character."

"What the hell is the play about?"

"Love, mistaken identities, fairies, magic, and trust."

Case gaped at her, and then burst into laughter. "Sounds like something a fag would write! Bianca, I forbid you to audition for the part! You are a young woman; it is not right for you to have your head in the clouds. Am I clear?"

"But Father…" Bianca realized her mistake a second too late. Case was on her in a flash, slapping every bit of her he could reach, and she yelped in pain, trying to protect her face. He punched her in the side, and her legs gave way. "Father stop! Please stop! I'm sorry!"

"Go to your room, and don't come out until I say you can. We'll discuss this…play some other time."

Bianca fled to her room, falling on her bed and crying.

Someday, she vowed, she would escape from this prison of a home and her father. The broken bird would fly free.

But that day was looking more and more unlikely.