It's been about a year since I created this story. It's almost crazy thinking about it. But I shouldn't ramble on. Please enjoy.

Disclaimer: Baka to Test to Shoukanjuu belongs to Inoue Kenji. I do not own it.

Please answer the following question:

What does the acronym AIDMA stand for? Hint: Psycology of Selling

Himeji Mizuki's answer:

Attention

Interest

Desire

Memory

Action

Teacher's Comment:

Good job as always, Himeji-san. Please remember these basic concepts if you plan on entering the business field later in life. They might end up being very useful.

Akihisa Yoshii's answer:

Attention grabbing cover

Interesting concept

Desirable price

Memorable characters

Action-packed gameplay

Teacher's Comment:

So close, yet so far…

Tsuchiya Kouta's answer:

Angle (The positioning is very important. According to my studies, slightly high angle shots are most popular)

Impact (The bigger the impression the item leaves on the client, the more they will want to buy. It is best if they end up nose-bleeding, though it's very messy to clean up)

Dress (Different clothing can bring a lot of variety to your many products which can suit almost any body's taste)

Memory-chip (Make sure that you always have spare memory in your camera. You never know when a good opportunity will show up)

Aki-chan (If all else fails, items of Aki-chan are very popular for some reason. For some reason though, my top buyers for these items are female… ?)

Teacher's comment:

You really are an expert in selling aren't you?

"Knock them a new one, Akihisa!"

"You can do it, Yoshii."

"…Good luck."

"Yeah, leave it to me!"

I took my friends pats on the back with oomph and headed over to the free-throw line. One of the opposing team's players passed me the ball which I stumbled to catch. I must be nervous as I felt sweat running all over my palm. Wiping it all off on my t-shirt, I took a firm grip on the ball and look up.

It was another one of our usual basketball games against the opposing schools in the street court by the bakery back in our first year. It was a big game, the biggest we had so far, with a hefty bet on the line, though I can't remember what we bet. 3 seconds left in the 4th quarter. The score was 62-60 with the opposing team in the lead. In the last few seconds, Mutsurrini managed to skillfully dodge past the enemy defenses, pass to Hideyoshii who volleyed it to me. I was going to shoot it in and tie the game when the opposing team fouled me, causing the current situation.

Just two free throws. Get both in and we go into overtime. Miss one and… well let's not think about that.

"Shoot already!"

One of the opposing team members yelled at me as I was standing at the free-throw line. What an impatient jerk… I'll show him!

*Whoosh*

The ball gently landed through the hoop and was received with a mix of cheer and frowns, depending on which side you're on. Behind me, Minami was excitedly dancing on spot. She must think this is easy.

"Alright, Akihisa… Just one more and it's over…"

I say to myself, focusing on the curve into the hoop.

I took in another breathe and realized that my palm was sweaty again. Just how nervous am I?

No matter, just one shot Akihisa. One shot, make it or break it. One shot…

And that basically summed up how nervous I was as I stood there waiting for Minami's reply. I was in my apartment, standing near the only telephone in the entire complex, as Himeji-san was dialing up Minami on the phone.

Earlier today, Himeji-san, Mutsurrini and I had engaged in an epic (or atleast in my eyes) battle against a deadly virus on the internet that had hacked into the school's ST system. Of course, we were handed our sorry asses even though we had the almighty Himeji-san on our side. Thus, after a rinse and repeat circle of remedial lessons and recovery exams, we were now trying to find allies for our battle. Hideyoshii is out of town and Yuuji is having some private time with Kirishima-san (Not sure if I should be sympathetic or jealous), leaving Minami as our only option. Now that you're up to date, on with the show!

"Oh hello. Ah, Hazuki-chan, is Minami-chan there? Hm? Yes… okay…"

I snapped out of my monologous trance as Himeji-san started talking in the phone. I guess the call went through at least.

Here it is, the moment of truth! Even if Minami won't talk to me, she wouldn't possibly ignore a phone call from Himeji-san. Yes, my plan is flawless!

"First of all, that's not much of a plan. Second, there's a huge hole in it."

So you've come again, Chibi Devil. But don't think that I'm not prepared this time… Okay, what's with the Hawaiian getup?

"Fool, it's not Hawaiian. It's L.A.! Not that an idiot would know the difference."

What? Oh yeah, I totally know the difference between Hawaii and L.A. I'm not that stupid, ya know.

"Really? Than you know what L.A. stands for?"

Of course. L.A. stands for…

Language Arts!

"…"

…

"…"

…

"…"

Wait, no, at least respond please. You're making me feel really embarrassed here.

"Moving on, from the topic of my american-themed t-shirt and your stupidity, you seem to not realize the major flaw in your plan."

No, don't just brush the topic off like that. I-I'm going to cry at this rate…

"Moving on, from the topic of my american-themed…"

I mean, I know that people call me stupid, but that doesn't mean that I don't know anything…

"… t-shirt and your stupidity, you seem to not…"

It actually really hurts when people call me an idiot you know. I know it doesn't seem like much, but deep down it really hurts and…

"…realize the major flaw in your plan."

Not to mention that…

"Moving on, from the topic of my-"

Okay, I get it, we're changing topics. You don't have to repeat yourself for the third time!

"…american-themed t-shirt and your-"

Shut up.

"Alright, Alright, I'll stop joking around… or so I want to say but it seems I'm out of time."
Wait we have a time for these inner conversations? I never heard about this.

"Focus on the ball, lover boy. Cya, next chapter."

And with that, the devil once again flew out of sight and disappeared into the depths of my brain.

But I feel like I'm forgetting something…

"Yes, can you give the phone to Minami-chan, Hazuki-chan?"

Oh yes, the current situation with the phone and Minami and all that.

I took a deep breath and honed all of my senses to hear the next words that Himeji-san would mutter as a response to whatever was happening on the other side of the phone.

However, my super thought-out plan to have Himeji-san be the one talking on the phone should totally work. I am 100% sure!

"Mn, yes…"

Here it was, the final free-throw shot. It's make it or break it time…

Please…

"Huh? Oh, so Minami-chan isn't feeling well and doesn't want to speak on the phone? Oh, okay. Well, thank you, Hazuki-chan. Yes, let's play together another time. Yes. Yes, bye bye."

And… my plan failed.

Alright, fess up, all of you guys out there reading this thought that it wasn't going to work weren't you.

"I'm sorry, Akihisa-kun, but it seems like Minami-chan doesn't want to talk."

"Auggh, I wonder why…"

There's no way my flawless strategy could fail so easily. There must be some sort of miscalculation… I really aren't suited for plans are I? I should just leave that stuff to Yuuji's rotten brain.

"…Lunch's ready."

I could hear Mutsurrini's soft voice from the kitchen and the sound of the gas stove being turned off. I guess he must have finished cooking while we were calling up the others.

And so, we shall be taking a temporary break to have lunch.

While our three heroes take a short break for lunch, let us tour the magnificent town named Fumizuki. It is a simple town nestled between Shinjuku and Saitama. It is a very peaceful town with a combination of modern architecture and serene nature that gives it a very inviting image. However, due to its unfortunate location, it is not a very prosperous town. It has several large hills that make expansion hard and is nowhere near the sea to be a port city. Since it's so close to Tokyo, tourists are rare. And so, due to the low human traffic and beautiful surroundings-

"AAAAAHHHHHHH! STAY AWAY FROM ME!"

-the sound of wildlife frequently echoes through the neighbourhood…

I screamed as I continued to run down the familiar street with all my strength. My feet had long become simple blocks of lead pounding on the concrete ground and my heart was telling me that it wouldn't last much longer but I kept running. If I stop now, something worse than exhaustion will be in store for me.

"…Yuuji, wait up."

"Don't say that so nonchalantly!"

Shouko casually replied in a tone unsuited to her current actions. She was holding a metal chain with her hands and her eyes were shining a creepy red while she ran with a speed that matched mine.

I know she's good at sports but for her to be able to match my top speed without getting tired… Is my childhood friend really human?

"Yuuji, you said that we could begin to build our happy family."

"No, I didn't! How did you manage to twist my words like that? Is there some sort of special filter in your brain?"

"But you promised…"

"How was I supposed to know that idiot Akihisa would actually decide to stay indoors for once!? I am so punching him if I survive this- WOOAH!"

I leap upwards to nearly dodge the chain lasso that Shouko had thrown at my leg. If it weren't for my instincts, that could have been the end of me.

"… Yuuji, it's not very polite to refuse a gift from a girl."

"How is a chained lasso supposed to be a gift? Just how the hell are you interpreting this situation?"

I can't take it, this girl. How am I supposed to deal with her? Any reasoning or actions I may make have to go through the weird filter in her head. However, as I think about it…

"Why the hell is nobody trying to stop this girl?"

We've been running for 10 minutes now and none of the neighborhood residents have tried to but in this weird chase that cannot be interpreted as anything else but a death hunt. Why do I just happen to live in the weird town where nobody thinks a girl chasing a boy around town with deadly intensity is normal?

Anyways, at this rate, all I can do is get caught and submit to my fate.

I take another deep breath and feel my body begin to give in. I was already running at all my strength so yelling at Shouko's stupidity has taken quite a bit of oxygen from my body. I won't make it at this rate.

There's no choice left, I have to lose her here or else it's over.

If my memory is correct, there's an alley ten meters ahead, between the bookstore and the jewelry shop. Its dark, filled with hard to navigate obstacles and -

"Now!"

I dodge quickly into the alleyway with a burst of energy. Shouko followed quickly behind, once again readying her lasso. Perhaps she wanted to try and corner me in the alley however this time I wouldn't let her get her way. I ran in at top speed and nimbly kicked a trash bin behind me. It was a slow and predictable obstacle so it wouldn't do much, however it would serve its purpose.

Shouko swiftly dodged the trash bin and aimed her lasso to catch me, however it was in vain.

"!"

-and it had a certain fence.

It was rusty and old but it was especially hard to climb due to the weird swirls in the pattern. For a normal person it would take atleast a minute to climb, however not for me.

"Oh heavens, give me strength!"

Instead of climbing up the fence, I launched myself at the neighboring wall and used it as a board to repel myself upwards and swung myself over the fence with my right hand.

Back in our first year, Akihisa and I used to go to the skate park for fun. There we did a bunch of crazy tricks and one of them happened to be wall jumping. We spent hours doing nothing but practicing our wall jumps until we perfected it. Without a board, it was even easier.

"Sorry, Shouko but I bid thee farewell." I cheerfully saluted to her as my body was propelled over the fence… or so I was before I saw what Shouko was planning.

With almost superhuman reflexes, Shouko had immediately taken out her stun gun after seeing my charge up the wall. She rushed forwards and was obviously intent on sending a vicious electric current through the metal fence. Really this girl…

"… Sorry, Yuuji but I know exactly how you think…"

Tch. I should have known that I couldn't outsmart Shouko like this.

"Clever girl."

My body responded to the danger before my mind could and instantly let go of the fence just in time for the several volts to miss me. However, it was not without cost and I awkwardly fell in a bad position that could not be good for my hips.

As I struggled to recover from my bad landing, Shouko was slowly but steadily climbing up the fence.

Urrgh, gotta move…

I unreasonably force my body to go forward and take advantage of the time it would take Shouko to climb the fence. I can barely walk now, I have to get away from her now.

I use the last of my strength to dash into the street on the other side of the alley and dash into the first shop I saw that was possible to hide in. A moment later, I saw Shouko pass by through the window, probably thinking that I had continued running down the street.

"Thank god…"

I sigh and looked at my surroundings. It seemed to be a Gyuudon shop. I guess I'll grab a bite here since its lunch time. Besides, Shouko might still be out there so it'll be safer if I just stay in here.

"Mmm, this is really good, Mutsurrini."

"It's delicious, Tsuchiya-kun."

"…thank you for your compliments."

Me and Himeji-san were idly flattering Mutsurrini as we enjoyed the food that he made. Really though, he truly is a good cook. On my modest table were several oriental dishes including chicken soup, tender pork on a bed of rice, and a brilliant egg dish that I can't even describe.

"Hey, Mutsurrini, how did you make this egg dish?"

I decided to ask him. It feels like something that Ane-san would like so if Mutsurrini would give me the recipe I can make it for her sometime.

"… hm? Well, the trick is in the battering of the eggs. Than you add a certain amount of vinegar and…"

"Vinegar? Is it really okay to add that to acetic acid?"

I feel like I just heard Himeji-san say something very scary, but in order to protect her innocence, I shall ignore it.

Mutsurrini continued to explain the recipe to me while Himeji-san turned on the TV and all of us ate in peace. Truly, its moments like these that make me grateful for a peaceful life.

"Ara? It looks like something's happening on the news."

I heard Himeji-san remark and curiously turn to the TV screen. Don't tell me it's another terrorist attack.

"-here bringing you the latest news. It seems that the phone systems around Japan have been acting strangely recently. Not only that, other electronic devices have been malfunctioning as well, such as the train scheduling or other IT systems. I have with me here, Hasegawa-san from the networking department. Hasegawa-san, can you possibly explain the cause of the current electronic malfunctions?"

The sound leaked out of the rather new television. Don't tell me that the cause of these malfunctions is…

"Thank you Kanbara-san. We believe that the cause of the malfunctions is some sort of virus in the system. Do not worry though as our best workers are currently trying to find the source and wipe it out."

Just as I thought… that virus is causing havoc again.

"Ahhh… just when things were getting peaceful."

I really am beginning to think that there is some sort of higher spirit that's purposely trying to ruin any moment of peace I have. Maybe I should rethink my decision of being Atheist…

"Akihisa-kun, the phone is ringing."

Himeji-san informed me and I noticed that my phone was in fact ringing. Err… it's just one thing after another.

"You guys keep eating, I'll take it. Maybe Yuuji decided to call back?"

I told Mutsurrini and Himeji-san and walked up to take the phone. I picked it up and pressed it up against my ears.

"Hello?"
"Good afternoon, ignorant brat."

"Ah, old granny, how may I help you today?"

"Drop the formalities, you know why I'm here."

"Speaking of which, how did you even manage to call me? Aren't the phone systems down?"

"Ha, you shouldn't underestimate an adult's efficiency, brat. I'm using a satellite phone. The virus hasn't reached that yet."

Huh, so you can do that. I guess the old granny's age isn't just for show.

"Seems awfully expensive though."
"If you're truly worried about my phone bill than you'd shut up and let me talk, foolish brat."

"Yes yes, how may I help you, ma-damn?"

"I suppose you watched the news. Since you guys were unable to defeat the virus, it has spread and is currently devouring the internet."

"Huh… so… we sort of messed up?"

You know, the way she says it makes it sound like it's my fault. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if that was her intention.

"Yes. Yes you did mess up. I hope you've been planning a way to defeat the virus."

"Um… of course…"

"You've been taking slacking off haven't you."
"Please don't tell the principal."

"I AM the principal."

"Oh yeah… I've been forgetting that lately. Right… you aren't just an old granny."

"Oh lord, I traded Kirishima-san for this. What made me even think that I could possibly work with you?"

Okay, so maybe I took a small lunch break. That's not too bad right? Everyone needs a break once in a while.

"Okay, just shut up and listen to me. I need you to defeat the virus ASAP. Do you need anything to help you, like backup?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Okay, you can reply to that."

"Oh, okay. You know, you should really clarify."

Sheesh, why would you expect someone to reply when you tell them to shut up? Such a silly old granny. I'm afraid she's starting to go senile.

"For lord's sake, just answer the question."

"Well, we've been trying to contact Yuuji and the others but we can't find anyone available to help us."

"I see… alright, I'll try to contact some students to back you up. Try contacting your friends again."

"Wait, how am I supposed to contact them if the phone doesn't work?"

"That's not a problem. For times like this, there's a backup messaging system that the phones have. Just type in the following number, wait for the beep and then type in the number you want to message."

"Huh, well that's convenient."

The government really has all its bases covered. I'm starting to appreciate it more and more.

"Anyways, I have business to do. I hate to say this but I'm counting on you, stupid brat."

And with that the damned old granny hung up on me.

You know, I probably shouldn't be thinking this but…

"The old granny is pretty spontaneous isn't she?"

"Akihisa-kun, who was it?"

"Oh right, it was the principal."

As I finished, Himeji-san called me. I slowly made my way back to my seat. It seems that they had already gotten to dessert Himeji-san and Mutsurrini were now quietly munching away on ice cream that I had in the freezer. I sat down and started at my meal once again.

"… what did she want?"

"She was telling us to hurry up and defeat the virus."

"I see… should we try again after lunch?"

"Well, I would prefer if we tried once more to contact the others."

Afterall, if we couldn't beat the virus before, there's no way we can win now that the virus has grown a little.

"…speaking of which, did you manage to contact anyone?"

"Um well… We managed to call Yuuji but he was busy and Minami well…"

"Ah, since we're on the topic, I wonder why Minami-chan didn't want to talk. Maybe she's not feeling well?"

Err… the forbidden topic. Well, it's not like Himeji-san knows what happened. It should be okay then…

"… didn't you and Shimada get into a fight, Akihisa?"

Goddamit, I forgot that this pervert knew.

"Eh? Is this true, Akihisa-kun?"

"Well… I wouldn't really say that we got into a fight. More like a little altercation."

"…do you even know what that word means?"

"Of course I do! I'm not that stupid okay?"

Sheesh, even I know some complex words.

"Nevermind that, Akihisa-kun. Did you make Minami-chan mad?"

"Well… about that…"

"…rather than a fight, it would more resemble a couple's quarrel I guess."

"Oh shut up, Mutsurrini."

"Akihisa-kun…"

Ahh… I can feel a deadly aura coming out of Himeji-san's body. I guess even she can get angry when she learns that her friends are in a fight.

"Okay okay, I confess. Me and Minami aren't exactly buddy buddy right now."

"…Minami and I…"

"Will you be quiet!?"

Why do we even call him a silent pervert? He doesn't know when to shut up.

"But why did you guys get into a fight?"

Himeji-san was really pushing me. She must really be worried about Minami. I guess that's what friends are huh.

"Okay fine, I'll fess up. But if I tell you guys, can we move on to the topic of the virus?"

"…gladly."

"Of course."

Alrighty then. Guess there's only one option left.

"Well you see…"

I placed my head in my pillow and let all my feelings flow out into it.

"Onee-chan, are you okay?"

Hazuki must be right outside my door. I suppose she must be worried about me.

Relunctantly, I get up from my bed and walk over to the door. I open it and look down at Hazuki.

"Yeah, I'm just fine, Hazuki. I'm just a little tired."

"Are you not feeling well, Onee-chan?"

"No, I'm fine, really. I'm just going to take a nap, okay? After that, we can play for the rest of the day."

I make a genuine smile as I crouch down and pat Hazuki on the head.

"If you say so, okay, Onee-chan."

Hazuki responded with her own smile and we face each other for a second before I let Hazuki go to watch television.

I move back to my bed and lie down on it…

Moments pass as I think of nothing, simply looking at the ceiling. Then, just a single thought appears in my head.

"I'm really being stupid aren't I?"

Once again, I must thank you for reading my work. If you would like to comment, a review would be wonderful. Otherwise, thank you for your time.