I know I've been so so so bad I said that I would update this like a week ago but I never got around to it! I'm really sorry! I made this quite long to make up for it so I hope you like it!

There was a second of silence that followed after they watched Diana leave the Empire lobby and hail a cab outside. Nobody quite knew what to do. Nate was the first one to stand up. He picked up his coat from the deep red leather armrest, and then looked at Serena, nodding.

"I'm going to go up and see if he's okay."

Blair stood up, and made to go with him but he turned around, motioning for her to sit back down.

"Just me." he said simply. He strode past the ceiling high columns that separated the bar and lounge from the lobby, and over to the elevators.

Blair thought about protesting, but then considered she owed Nate something. Given her past actions he wouldn't have been completely out of line if he told her to bugger off. At least he was letting her stay.

Serena smiled at Blair. The smile didn't reach her eyes but she knew Serena meant well. Things had been awkward between them ever since the night that Blair had admitted she had feelings for Dan, and Blair had tried her best to avoid Serena. Her excuse had been that she didn't want to rub the relationship in Serena's face, but the truth was that she didn't know what to say to her best friend. She felt like they didn't even know each other anymore.

There was an uncomfortable silence between them, and Blair fidgeted with the white Hemes bag she was carrying, as she constantly waiting for any sign that it was okay for her to go up and see Chuck.

"Do you think he'll want me there?" Blair whispered suddenly, not looking up from her lap but waiting for Serena's answer. She was scared that Chuck would tell her he didn't need her here. That she had hurt him too many times and he was done.

Serena signed before answering, "Of course he will." She looked up, staring off into the distance at nothing in particular. "Even though sometimes they don't deserve it, he never gives up on the people he loves."

Blair smiled sadly, trying to push away the feeling of guilt that washed over her. She saw a group of teenage girls who looked around sixteen walk into the lobby, laughing and chattering, stumbling in their sky high heels. She felt sad as she looked at them, as they reminded her of her and Serena at that age. Going to parties, bars, causing trouble. Flirting with guys. Blair had always been the one who ended the night alone but she still had fun anyway. She wasn't the kind of girl that you 'went home with'.

Serena's phone buzzed suddenly, and the girl stuck out her long slender arm, retrieving the phone and then putting it up to her ear.

"Is he okay?" she asked into the phone worriedly, obviously speaking to Nate.

She nodded, and then waited a few seconds.

"I'll… we'll be up in a second." she put the phone back in her bag, standing up. The sparkly black mini dress she was wearing clinched in all the right places, and she looked down at Blair, smiling slightly. "Nate said we should come up now."

The two girls walked over to the elevator and Blair reached out to press the up button. At the same moment Serena did as well, and Blair jerked her arm away quickly. There was an awkward pause before the chiming of the lift announced its arrival, and both girls entered it, standing on either side of the small room and giving each other coveted glances.

"Feels oddly familiar doesn't it?" Blair observed, remembering back to the time two years ago when Serena and Blair had been fighting yet again. Chuck had entrapped them in a lift, announcing over the speaker that they would not be allowed out until they made up with each other.

Serena and Blair smiled at each other, remembering the time. She couldn't quite remember what they had been fighting about. She wondered if three years from now she would look back on this time and have forgotten what she and Serena had been fighting about.

The elevator stopped suddenly, signalising that they had reached the penthouse, and the doors slid open slowly and silently, revealing the grey brick walls of the penthouse in which Chuck and Nate resided.

Serena was the first to exit the elevator, walking around the corner, and out into the large living room and kitchen space. Blair followed close after her.

She observed the situation. Nate was leaning against the tall wall-length bookshelf/TV cabinet on the right side of the room. He was drinking a glass of what looked like scotch, looking over at his best friend anxiously. He nodded a 'hey' to Serena and Blair as they walked into the room. Serena immediately went to take her place beside Nate, she too glancing at Chuck with a worried look on her face.

The dark haired man was seated on the large orange couch with his back to the entrance of the penthouse. His posture was stuff, with his back straight and gaze ahead of him. He didn't seem to even register the fact that Serena and Blair had come into the room. A glass of untouched scotch was in his hand, and that alone was enough to tell that something was definitely wrong. Chuck Bass only ever rejected a drink when he was really agitated.

"How are you doing Chuck?" Serena asked kindly, looking over at her step brother. He didn't look over at her in return. He continued to look straight forward, it was as if he hadn't even heard Serena.

Serena glanced up at Blair for a second, who still hadn't gone to join her two best friends on the other side of the room. Se continued to look at Chuck's back. Trying to decipher what it all meant.

She used to know Chuck so well. Would be able to tell what he was thinking and feeling without even words. But now, it seemed like his thoughts were running at a different frequency to hers. She was unable to tell what he was contemplating.

Nate put his glass down on the coffee table in the middle of the living room. "I say we have a match of wii tennis." he said, trying to break the ice and get Chuck to respond to something. Serena reacted enthusiastically, agreeing to get out snacks and drinks while Nate set up the TV. Nate was known for his skill on the Wii, and Blair remembered when he had first moved into Chuck's apartment that he had bugged his best friend for weeks and weeks to let him get one. Chuck had finally agreed.

Blair on the other hand, felt no interest in playing wii tennis, and instead was still staring intently at the boy with his back to her who hadn't said a word yet.

"Blair come and help me with drinks!" Serena said enthusiastically, gesturing for Blair to come and join her. The brunette girl reluctantly went over the join the blonde one, and together they poured out anything they could find in Chuck's bar into the large glass tumblers.

When they had all finally taken seats on the couch around the TV, Serena and Nate sat next to each other on the long side of the 'L' shaped lounge, and Blair next to Chuck on the short side. Chuck still hadn't said a word or moved much.

"Common man, you have to verse me first. You know I'll flog you." Nate said laughing pushing the remote towards Chuck encouragingly. Chuck cringed away from the remote, putting his glass down on the table with a bang, standing up and then walking across the room into his bedroom. Slamming the door behind him without a word.

Serena gasped, and then looked quickly at Nate. "Just leave him for a while." Nate said, staring at the door that had just been closed. "He probably just needs some time to process it all."

"Do you know what Diana said to him?" Serena asked quietly, careful not to let Chuck hear that they were talking about him.

"He hasn't said anything." Nate shook his head.

"I'm really worried about him." Serena took a sip from her glass, her too, looking over at Chuck's bedroom.

Nate nodded in agreement, "Give him some time." he said again, turning back to the television.

Blair stood up without the other two noticing, walking around the corner into the kitchen. She opened the fridge. Nothing much was in there except for a jug of milk and a box of Godiva's. On the little table overlooking the street was a newspaper, the cover of it announced the 'Finance Sector' and Blair walked over to look at the various papers Chuck had left scattered all over the table. Most were just financial statements from Bass Industries. One of them caught her eye, it was his monthly credit bill. She scanned down the list almost the various bills for the Empire and Bass industries she saw one that made her heart sink. A sum of twenty million dollars had been transferred into the Grimaldi family savings. She looked at the number. He shouldn't have done it. Nate had told last week that Chuck had been unable to finance a project at The Spectator due to money issues. At the time it had sounded absurd, Chuck Bass? Short on money? But now she saw the bill she could see why Chuck wasn't exactly throwing his money away to anything anymore. She tucked the piece of paper under the newspaper, feeling guilty and not wanting Nate or Serena to come along and see it. To see how ungrateful she was.

She could hear them in the living room laughing, hitting the imaginary balls with the remote controls and falling over each other in an attempt to get a high score. They didn't notice. She slipped around the side of the Kitchen without them seeing and into the corridor that had the two bedrooms and elevator coming off it.

Her hand trembled as she reached out for the knob of Chuck's bedroom door. She was worried about what state she would find him in. Usually when he was angry he would be annoyed if she intruded on him. But if he was really upset she knew he was secretly glad of the company.

She opened the door. Slipping into the room without a sound.

He was sitting on the edge of the made bed, his head in his hands, eyes closed. He looked like he was concentrating very hard on something.

"Chuck?" Blair said timidly, taking a few steps closer to him.

He raised his head, looking at her. But it didn't look like he was really looking at her. His eyes were empty, and it seemed like he was looking through her, like he didn't even recognise her.

"Chuck are you okay? What did Diana say to you?" He put his head back in his hands but this time his eyes stayed open, focussing on the point of the room where the floor became wall.

Blair sat down hesitantly next to him, smiling kindly and then in a rush of bravery taking his hand from his face and holding it in both of hers. He looked up abruptly, as if confused, he kept looking at his hand but slowly his gaze travelled up to her face. Blair smiled again at him and he quickly looked away.

Chuck swallowed, "Bart and Diana had an affair." he said, looking straight ahead of him, at the glass wall that separated his bedroom from the main room. "Diana wasn't ready to keep the baby so they decided that they would pass it off as Evelyn's."

Blair felt her heart break as she heard Chuck refer to himself as 'it'. She frowned, still holding onto his hand. "But.. Evelyn didn't carry through with it?" So that Elizabeth Fisher woman had been Chuck's mother in a sense. She had been Bart's wife, but not Chuck's proper mother.

Chuck shook his head, "No. Apparently not. She split up with my father and then changed her name to Elizabeth, disappearing."

And now that Blair thought about it, it all added up. Elizabeth knew things about Chuck and his father that only a mother would know. But then she had also been able to hurt him and walk away from him. Something that a real mother would never be able to do.

Blair squeezed his hand. "What are you going to do now?" she asked him, trying to gain some kind of emotional response from him, he seemed so empty right now. It was putting her on edge.

"I don't know. She told me to come and find her if I wanted to talk." he said, still staring straight ahead through the glass, where the silhouettes of Serena and Nate jumping around laughing could be seen.

"You should talk to her Chuck." Blair urged him gently, looking at him and smiling encouragingly, "You've always wanted a mother, this is your chance."

He turned to face her, and she could see now that his eyes were swimming with tears. He swallowed, "I'm scared." he admitted, and she had never heard Chuck Bass admit something like that before. It took her off guard.

"I don't know why she left. I don't understand."

And as she looked at him, and he looked at her, in that moment she could still see the little seven year old boy. The one who tagged after Nate and Serena, always competing to get in front of Blair, to be the more valued.

And she didn't deny him that. Although at the time she had found it annoying. When she had grown up she had come to realise that there was a reason he was like that. A reason why he needed them, why he craved for someone just to want him. Simply want him. Because he had never had it before in his life.

He had never felt valued. He had never had the unconditional love of a mother, who would always want him, no matter what.

He looked embarrassed, as he looked away from her, taking his hand out of hers and wiping it against his eyes. It left wet smudge marks along his cheekbones. "What happened to your party?"he asked, "I hope you didn't abandon it on my account." he sniffed.

Blair shook her head. "The party was stupid. I don't know what I was thinking."

Chuck smiled slightly, 'It wasn't that bad, I was finding it quite enjoyable until Gossip Girl decided to make her little reveal."

Blair snorted, rolling her eyes, "You're just being polite," she nudged him on the shoulder, grinning.

She sobered, "But Chuck, if you ever want to talk to me. I'm here. I'll always be here. I don't know what I was thinking the other day when I told you those things."

He looked at his hands in front of him, the corners of his mouth turning upwards. "Thanks."

Blair stood up, smoothing her dress of crinkles. "Are you leaving?" he asked, and he looked up at her fretfully.

"I'm not going anywhere." she said. He didn't want her to leave. And she felt an eruption of love for him, that after everything she had done, all the crap she had put him through, he still wanted her to be a part of his life. Still valued her. Eve though she didn't deserve it. Because that was what Chuck did. He didn't hold things against people, or judge them for their past. He valued them the way he had always wanted to be valued.

*NOTE: I'm not exactly sure how much the dowery would be. They never mentioned it on the show so I estimated. Sorry if it sounds totally off the mark!