Summary: In the Marauders' seventh year, Sirius proclaims that Head Boy James Potter is a traitor to all that is true and good in the world, and he is now best friends with Remus Lupin. Remus doesn't really get a say in the matter. Eventual slash.

Note: I'm not really planning on this being too long, but who knows what could happen? I guess we'll just have to wait and see!

Remus felt a strange wave of happiness and nostalgia as he passed through the barrier at King's Cross and walked along Platform 9 3/4. The Hogwarts Express gleamed in all its impressive glory just as it had the previous six years that he had seen it, although it seemed much smaller than it was even just last June. Take a mental picture, mate, he thought as he gazed upon it for the last first time.

The nostalgia soon gave way to sadness, the kind that gives your heart a death grip and makes you want to curl up in a bed and never leave for a week. Of course, thinking of beds made Remus even sadder because he realized that the bed at Hogwarts that he had always thought of as his own wasn't really his own at all, and he would have to relinquish it in only ten short months. He sighed, and probably could have stewed in his own pity for several moments if he hadn't been interrupted from his pathetic thoughts.

"Sorry to bother you, but could you help me with my trolley?" a small voice said, and Remus turned and saw a girl trying to manage a trolley easily double her size. He went to her side and assisted her place it on the train.

"Hold it steady there," Remus said as he lifted with his knees. The girl gave him a smile when he was through.

"Thank you very much," she said, even more quietly, staring at the ground, letting her hair stringy black hair fall into her eyes.

"You're welcome," Remus said, but true to his derisible nature, he actually felt a bit of resentment for this girl, this first year that was getting to experience everything new and magical about Hogwarts for the first time. But that feeling was quickly replaced with something else, as Remus realized that the girl was alone, and that she was only one of a few of the smaller children along the platform. There weren't going to be as many first years as there usually were. The few whose parents let them come were going to have an amazing year, of course, but there was going to be a black cloud hanging over them all. Was Remus really so pathetic as to be jealous of that?

"I'll help you get settled," he said as he stepped onto the train. The girl hesitated, but Remus held out his hand. She took it, and he pretended not to notice the way she blushed madly at the contact. At least that was one thing he wouldn't miss about being young, Remus decided. Being utterly embarrass-able about everything.

"The train ride's the best part of the trip," Remus explained as they walked down the corridor. "Well, it is the trip, but I meant, just the atmosphere, the friendship, the merriment. You don't care about semantics, do you?" And Remus could tell that the girl didn't understand what he was saying, but he was mostly just talking to himself now. "Are you a Muggle-Born?" Remus asked.

"Er," the girl said quietly before answering. "I believe so."

"You're new to magic?"

"Oh, yes," the girl said, her face lighting up. "I can barely believe that I'm here."

Remus beamed her a smile, trying to ignore the voice in the back of his head that told him that things weren't going so well in the wizarding world, and they were probably even worse for little Muggle-Born witches.

"Well, this is my last year, and I'm telling you, you're going to have the time of your life. Hogwarts is amazing." He paused outside a compartment in which he saw a little blonde boy gazing out the window. "Hello," he said upon opening the door. "Are you a first year?"

The blonde boy straightened his back and eyed Remus warily. He was definitely of magic blood, even if he was just suspicious that an older student might want to pick on him. "Yes," he said after a moment, sounding confident.

"Well, then, here you go," Remus said. "You should get to know each other." He motioned between the two children. Remus held his hand out to the little girl. "It was a pleasure meeting you, miss...?"

"Crumb. Mary Crumb." The girl took Remus's hand and only partially blushed.

"My name's Remus Lupin, Miss Mary Crumb, and I hope that you feel free to say hello if you see me around."

"I will," Mary said with a large smile, and then she stepped into the compartment. "Thank you, Mister Lupin," she said before shutting the door, and while part of Remus wanted to laugh at being addressed as Mister, another, even bigger part was fairly proud of himself. He had managed to channel his nostalgia into something worthwhile, something like mentoring a new student.

"I know you haven't had a girlfriend in ages, Moony, but please tell me you haven't stooped to picking up wee, little first years," a voice said, and Remus turned and grinned at James Potter, who, between his latest growth spurt and fancy blue robes was looking much too mature for Remus's taste. Before he could even open his mouth to comment on it, though, James held up his hand. "Don't say a word, it's all my mum's doing. She wanted me to look special today. Can't imagine why," he said in the kind of voice that sounded genuinely mystified while absent-mindedly rubbing at the Head Boy badge pinned to his chest, belying his understanding.

Remus shook his head at the badge. "What in Merlin's name was Dumbledore thinking?" Remus then cringed because he knew exactly what the headmaster was thinking. After The Incident last year, he had been gradually placing more and more responsibility on James. Fortunately for Remus, James was never one to make things awkward, at least in the obvious way.

"Clearly he's madly in love with me, and this was the subtlest way he could say so," James said. "I've been trying to let him down gently, trying to let the old goat know that we can't run away together in the end, but..." James sighed dramatically. "I always have been a sucker for beards."

"That would explain quite a few of your ex-girlfriends," Remus said. "I suppose you're heading to the prefects' cabin?"

James's eyes immediately flicked to Remus's cloak, to the spot where his prefect badge used to be, but where it was no longer, before meeting his friend's gaze once more. "I suppose I am," he said. "When you see Pads, do try not to mention where I'm at, or he's liable to break down in tears."

"Yeah, that's right," Remus said. "You two are still having that row." That row was actually a rather big row, one which involved Sirius Black leaving the Potters' at the end of the summer and renting his own flat without even inviting James to visit. But for someone who was involved in such a nasty argument with his very best friend, James didn't seem too worried.

"I'm not too worried," he said. "Padfoot needs to lick his wounds in private, but then he'll come 'round eventually, wanting to be scratched on the ears. It's just how he is. I think he's down that way, if you want to sit down."

"You've spoken?"

"Nah, the bastard just flicked me the Vs before slamming the door in my face."

"Oh, so he's already warming up to you," Remus said with a smile. James laughed.

"Yeah. He won't keep quiet during the feast, just watch. We've yet to plan a proper start-of-term prank and I'm sure it's driving him mad."

The thought that James and Sirius hadn't planned a prank made Remus feel so depressed that he could barely stand it. It seemed too... weird. James and Sirius were always at the ready with an arsenal of pranks just brimming around their heads, waiting for the proper outlet. The fact that they hadn't spent all summer holed up in James's room, talking about exploding treacle tarts or something was very, very depressing. Remus looked at James's Head Boy badge one last time. He knew that what Dumbledore was doing was very wise, and he had always known, maybe in the back of his mind, that it would someday come to this, but growing up wasn't turning out to be the subtle, beautiful process he had always imagined it as. Instead, it rather felt like he was being pushed off of broom at a break-neck speed.

Sirius was sprawled dramatically across the seat, black cloak thrown across his face. The trousers he was wearing were too small and his ankles were clearly visible. Peter was sitting on the opposite side and smiled brightly when he saw Remus. "Was wondering where you ran off to," he said.

"I helped a little first year get settled and then ran into James," Remus said as he went about setting up his own trolley. Sirius shifted at the mention and so Remus knew he wasn't asleep. Sirius was never very good at sitting still for long periods of time.

"Oh, he's with the prefects now, isn't he?" Peter said, and Remus wondered if Peter was really that thick of if he was just trying to push Sirius's buttons. His question was immediately answered when Peter went on, "It's so weird seeing you here at the start, mate. Usually it's just us talking about Chocolate Frogs and girls until you arrive."

Remus didn't feel very sad about his prefectship being revoked because he was never very good at it, and he didn't like having responsibilities placed on him, but he did feel kind of like a failure. "Two of my favorite things to discuss and you lot can't even wait for me?" he said. "How utterly depressing."

"Well now you're here for the first part of the trip," Peter said, "and James is the unlucky sod locked away with the prefects, so it's only fair that we discuss his favorite topics."

"I'm not too keen on Quidditch," Remus said, and he sat next to Peter and stretched his legs out. "I suppose we could always talk about Lily."

Sirius grunted at that but didn't move and Remus exaggeratedly cupped his ear. "What did you say, Padfoot? I don't think I heard you."

"I think he got upset when you mentioned Lily," Peter said, straining for a reaction himself. When one wasn't forthcoming, he sighed. "He told me to fuck off about twelve times before you arrived, so I guess he's in a mood."

"Nonsense," Remus said. "He only said fuck off twelve times and everyone knows that that only means you're a bit tired. If he had said it thirteen times, that would mean he was truly angry."

"Fuck off," Sirius said in a growl, sounding surprisingly un-muffled by the cloak.

Remus sighed. "You're not even going to look at us? Come on, then, we'll be wanting to know all about your new place," he said, but Sirius didn't respond and he turned to Peter. "I guess it's just you and me, then. We'll have to think of a prank for the feast ourselves."

Peter's eyes went wide. "You want to plan the prank?" he said. "Is there one?"

"Not according to Mister Prongs, and we simply can't start off our last year without one," Remus declared. "It would be sacrilegious, frankly."

Remus hadn't realized he'd been trying to get a response from Sirius until he saw that the boy had pulled the cloak off of his face and was scrutinizing him. "What are you going on about?"

"Well," Remus said. "I know that I'm not as good at the ideas bit as you and James are, but I'm certainly the best at thinking of the execution, so I figure I could cook up something decent while we wait." He tapped his chin thoughtfully. "I'm always fond of being silly, and of course, laughing droughts are very silly. Does it sound realistic?"

Sirius didn't respond to that, either, just covered his head back up with the cloak.

"It was a worth a shot," Peter said, "but I think we're on our own, Moony."

"Fine by me," Remus said.

He and Peter were half-way through planning out how to slip laughing droughts into the grand feast when James finally arrived to the cabin. Sirius really had fallen asleep at some point, and his snores were echoing throughout the compartment.

"Honestly," James said while looking at his best friend, "it's like he wants us to hate him."

"Was your row really just about the Head Boy thing?" Peter asked while Remus went about writing a letter to Millie, a very sweet house elf who had a tendency to visit Remus with pain medicines during the night after the full moon.

"Yes, but you know Sirius, he'll look for any excuse to deem you the enemy," James said. "What's going on here?" He motioned to Remus's parchment, and when Remus told him of the plan, he was surprised when James frowned.

"Oh," he said, sounding disappointed. "Laughing drought?"

"Why not?" Remus said. "It's readily available in the hospital wing for depression, it's easy to make, so we can replace it, and no one will be bothered by giggles at the feast. It's a perfectly nice prank," Remus said, suddenly feeling defensive.

"It's not quite that," James said. "It's just..." But James didn't say anything else, and Remus shrugged.

"Surely you've no objections as Head Boy?" he asked, and James shook his head quickly.

"No, no, nothing like that. I just worry about making a scene is all."

Peter was the one who gaped at James for that. "You're the one worried about making a scene?"

James bristled. "It can't be that hard to believe."

"Well, why don't you want to make a scene?" Remus said, but they must've not noticed that Sirius wasn't snoring anymore because he sat upright and glared at James.

"Oh, shut it, Potter, Moony's the only one with the balls at this very moment, so why don't you run along to Evans and ask her to give you yours back and leave us alone." Sirius came over to Remus's side, plopped down next to him and looked over the note. "Tell Millie to only put the drought in the chocolate pudding. It'll be funnier if only a few students are laughing and it'll make everyone think hard about what's causing it. Also, the later it happens in the feast, the more it'll confuse people."

Remus did as Sirius instructed, and then Sirius gave the note to his owl Echidna to take ahead of them. He was scowling when he went back to his lying down. "This compartment's a little crowded," he said. "Maybe you'll want to sit somewhere else." And then he threw the cloak over his face again.

James's eyes sparked with rage, and Remus worried that he might in fact curse his best friend. But then he did nothing and left the compartment with his fancy robe billowing impressively behind him.

All in all, Remus decided, it wasn't really all in his head. Seventh year was starting off rather depressingly.