Warnings: Squick all over the place. I'm not warning for anything specific, though, so read at your own risk. Not a happy fic.

Oh man, so much hate for the last chapter :( I agree it was rushed, but surely you all know by now that I suck at endings. (And I did warn that it wasn't a happy fic.) I might fix it someday, I might not. Until then, I suggest doing what I do when authors disappoint me and pretend it doesn't exist.

So this "chapter" is a deleted scene that got deleted because there was no way Cloud would have gone for it, but it was fun to write anyway. It's smutty smut with girl parts Cloud. Beware.

XXX

Sephiroth's eyes flew open at the sound of a door creaking and he tensed, preparing to move at the first sign of a threat.

"Sephiroth?"

Cloud's voice instantly calmed him, and he sat up. "What is it? You can come in."

Cloud crept quietly into the room, as though he were still trying not to disturb him, which Sephiroth found oddly sweet. He patted the bed next to him and held up the covers for Cloud to crawl under. It was a bit chilly, after all.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Cloud said, blushing, "I was just—I know you meant it just to show me how, but do you think—"

"Do I think what, Cloud?" Sephiroth was certain he knew where Cloud was going with this—he could smell it—and he stroked Cloud's hair and pulled him a bit closer.

"Touching... It's still—it's still scary. On my own. If you could just—"

"Do you want me to help you again?" Sephiroth ran his hand down Cloud's side, his fingers brushing over the small bump that marked Cloud's breast under his binder.

"Y—yes. If—if you don't mind."

"Of course I don't. I know it's frightening." He slowly rolled Cloud so he was lying on his back and brushed the pad of his thumb over his lips. "Was it too much for you last time? Would you rather I just..." His sentence trailed off as he traced his finger along his jaw line.

"Please..." Cloud moved into his touch and didn't even flinch when Sephiroth lifted his top shirt. He raised his arms for Sephiroth to pull it over his head, and the shirt landed in a heap towards the foot of the bed.

"Don't be scared. If you're uncomfortable with anything, tell me." He brushed his lips over Cloud's, then moved back to them when he felt them move against his. "I just want to make you feel good," he murmured against them.

He felt Cloud nod, and moved his hands to the binder. It was a pullover style one, he noticed to his relief—no velcro to make a loud sound and disturb things. He carefully eased it up, taking care not to pinch. Cloud took a deep breath when he pulled it off; they really were too tight to be wearing all the time.

"Deep breaths. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

Sephiroth gave him a few moments to catch his breath, then lowered his mouth to a slightly reddened nipple, prompting a gasp. He sucked gently before moving over to the other one; the temptation to bite was there, but Sephiroth knew he had to take care and be gentle. Cloud had given him permission, but it wouldn't do to frighten him. This was scary enough as it was.

"That—that feels really nice," Cloud murmured. His hands gripped fitfully at the sheets as Sephiroth licked and sucked, drawing out occasional quiet gasps and causing Cloud's hips to rock.

He traced his fingers up Cloud's thigh and across his stomach, stopping to cup his breast and give it a gentle squeeze. They were perfectly sized, in his opinion. Any larger and Cloud would have a difficult time concealing them, but they fit so nicely in the palm of his hand; he was glad they weren't smaller.

He wanted to encourage Cloud to touch him back, but didn't want to push him too far. Besides, just being able to touch... to make Cloud moan... that was pleasure enough. He moved his hands downward again and delicately tugged at the waistband of his pants.

"Lift your hips," he paused in teasing Cloud's nipple long enough to say, then went back to nibbling gently with his lips.

Cloud complied and Sephiroth slid both his pants and underwear off, not wanting to make it a two-step process. He shoved the blankets aside—he could keep Cloud warm enough—and leaned back for a moment. She—he was absolutely beautiful. He must have been frustrated. It had been over two weeks since Sephiroth had helped him masturbate; if he hadn't touched himself since then... he might have been fantasizing and trying to work up the courage. It would have taken a combination of a lot of courage and a lot of frustration to approach him and ask for him to do this.

"You're doing wonderfully," he said, bringing his hand up to stroke Cloud's cheek. "I'm going to touch you, is that all right?"

"Yes. Please..." Cloud rocked his hips and spread his legs just a fraction, clearly trying to hold himself back.

"It's okay, sweetheart, just react however you want. I know you've been needing this." He slid his hand from Cloud's knee up his leg, cupping his ass for a moment before pressing it between his thighs. He gently eased them apart while returning his attention to Cloud's breasts to keep him from panicking. At his first touch, Cloud let out a loud moan, then immediately covered his mouth, turning the moan into a muffled whimper. "Just react, Cloud. Don't be embarrassed. All you're doing is letting me know what feels good."

He rubbed his fingers over Cloud's warm folds, spreading the moisture that was already there around, and pushing his legs a little further apart at the same time. Sliding his fingers slightly further down, he pressed his thumb against the side of Cloud's clit and rubbed, alternating from side to side, but never pressing directly on it.

"Does it feel good?" he asked, wanting to hear Cloud say it.

"Y—yeah, it's good."

He looked up to see Cloud worrying his bottom lip between his teeth and smirked at the sight. He kissed his way down Cloud's chest and stomach, pausing to dip his tongue into his belly button, before pressing carefully against Cloud's entrance with his middle finger. He eased it into the tight warmth, moving slowly so that Cloud would have an opportunity to push him away if he didn't like it.

"Good," he murmured and moved his head further down, planting kisses on his hip, then continuing closer to his pubic region. He shifted subtly while continuing to massage gently around Cloud's clit, moving between Cloud's legs and using his free hand to lift them one at a time, bending them at the knee. It was a struggle to move so slowly, but Sephiroth held himself back; Cloud needed slow. And waiting would make his final reward all the sweeter.

He withdrew his finger, though he hadn't done anything more than insert it yet, and spread Cloud's labia apart, granting himself easy access with his mouth. Cloud cried out loud and made no attempts at muffling it when he licked from her entrance up to her—his clit, then licked a slow, lazy circle around it.

Cloud gasped and fumbled around blindly with his hands alternating between gripping the sheets and looking for something else to grab onto. Sephiroth pushed his own pants off as quickly as he could without Cloud noticing, then caught one of Cloud's hands in his own. He squeezed it tightly and continued to work him with his tongue and lips; the noises Cloud was making was the sweetest sort of music, and his taste was everything Sephiroth had imagined it would be.

He kept his focus off of Cloud's clit, wanting to make this last for as long as he could. Instead, he pressed his tongue as far as he could inside, and licked all around, but only teased him with the occasional flick of his tongue directly on the sensitive bundle of nerves. Eventually, however, Cloud's cries grew more desperate, and Sephiroth shifted his attention. He sucked his clit between his lips and pressed them together, flicking it with his tongue as he did so. At the same time, he slid two fingers into Cloud and thrust gently. Cloud's scream was loud enough to nearly make him lose his concentration, but he kept going, pressing Cloud's clit firmly against the bone beneath with his tongue until he felt Cloud shudder with the start of his orgasm.

Sephiroth continued to work him until Cloud lay gasping with his knees dropped to either side, then stopped before the sensations became too much and Cloud thought to push him away.

He moved his hand away and pushed himself up, intentionally letting his erection brush against Cloud's inner thigh as he did so. He leaned down to murmur in Cloud's ear, "Good, you did really well. Did you enjoy that?"

"Mmm hmm." Cloud's dazed look faded slightly as Sephiroth allowed his erection to rest against him.

"Good," Sephiroth repeated, rolling his hips ever so slightly. "I'll make you feel good again." He rolled his hips again, hoping that Cloud would get the hint. Jerking off just wasn't going to cut it. Even just rubbing on Cloud like this would at least be slightly better.

Cloud's eyes widened, but he didn't pull away. "You want...Will it—will it hurt?"

"No, sweetheart, I'll be gentle. I'll make sure it's good for you." He brushed some hair out of Cloud's face and kissed him softly. "You know I won't hurt you or do anything you don't like."

"I know..."

Sephiroth reached for his nightstand without taking his eyes off of Cloud, and pulled a condom and a bottle of lube out of the drawer. He had purchased the condoms on a whim, not actually expecting that he'd get the opportunity to use them. He made a mental note to follow through on his whims more often; they seemed to pay off.

Cloud trembled slightly underneath him, so Sephiroth set the condom aside for the moment and stroked his hair again. "Are you frightened?" he asked, then nibbled on the shell of Cloud's ear.

"A—a little."

"Of me?" He licked Cloud's neck, prompting a quiet gasp.

"No... I trust you. It's just..."

"A frightening notion?"

Cloud nodded, chewing on his bottom lip again.

"Would you rather not?" Sephiroth shifted slightly, making sure that Cloud could feel his erection, just as a reminder. He would stop, if that was what Cloud wanted, he just wanted to make sure that Cloud knew how much he wanted it.

"No. No, I want it," Cloud said, almost firmly. "Just... go slow."

"Of course." Sephiroth kissed him almost chastely for a moment, lingering with their lips simply pressed together. Then he ran his tongue over Cloud's slightly swollen bottom lip and pressed it in; Cloud opened his mouth and let him deepen their kiss with a soft sigh. When he pulled back, leaving Cloud breathless, he felt rather out of breath himself, but he reached for the condom and tore open the packet.

He placed a small dot of lubricant on the inside of the condom and rolled it on quickly, then spread a little bit more lube over himself. "Still okay?" he asked before he took Cloud's nipple into his mouth again and squeezed his other breast, rolling his nipple between his index finger and thumb.

"I—I'm good," Cloud gasped.

Sephiroth barely stopped himself from jerking back in surprise when he felt a hesitant hand in his hair. "That's it," he murmured. He held himself over Cloud's chest and just let him touch while he casually moved his legs into a better position. Cloud clutched suddenly at his hair when he felt Sephiroth press his cock against him, but again, he made no indication that he wanted to stop. "You can touch me all you want. And tell me if I'm going too fast."

Cloud shifted his hands and cautiously touched Sephiroth's arms, then moved on to his chest. He seemed slightly afraid, as though Sephiroth might suddenly decide that this was an affront to his person and start yelling. But he remained still while Cloud explored, realizing that this was a very new thing for him. Sephiroth had seen and touched Cloud countless times, but this was Cloud's first time doing more than hug him. Eventually, Cloud seemed to grow a little bolder and even slid his hands down far enough to cautiously squeeze his ass.

He shifted slightly and blinked up at Sephiroth. "You can. I'm ready."

Sephiroth nodded and lifted Cloud's legs one at a time so they were resting on his hips, then reached down to ease himself in. He let out a low groan as he was encased in the heat of Cloud's body and had to fight his urge to just slam into him. "You feel so good, Cloud," he whispered.

Cloud was trembling again and clutching at his shoulders like he was trying to hold on.

"Does it hurt?" Sephiroth asked, silently begging Cloud not to say 'yes'.

"N—no, not really. It's weird."

Sephiroth lifted his hips enough so he could fit his hand between their bodies and gently rubbed Cloud's clit. "It's okay, I understand. You were okay before, right, when I was using my fingers?"

Cloud nodded, easing up on his grip slightly.

"This is the same, just a little bit bigger." He began moving slowly, making sure not lose his focus on Cloud's pleasure. "I'll make you feel just as good, just relax."

He pushed himself up on one arm so he would have a little more freedom to move his hand and gradually increased the speed of his thrusts. He watched Cloud's expression change slowly from uncertainty to pleasure. He groaned again when Cloud's muscles suddenly contracted in a short spasm, and he thrust in a bit harder, feeling his balls slap against the backs of Cloud's thighs.

Cloud cried out in pleasure with each thrust, tightening his grip on Sephiroth's hips with his legs. His face was bright pink, and he was worrying his lip again; Sephiroth quickly ducked down to kiss him, then pushed up again, moving his fingers faster.

"Se—Sephiroth—"

Cloud's inner walls tightened and loosened around him as his whole body shuddered, and Sephiroth dropped down onto his elbow. He moved his hand away and angled his thrusts so they would carry Cloud through his climax, and brought it up to Cloud's lips. Cloud automatically opened his mouth to suck his fingers into it, tasting himself on them.

Sephiroth felt his gut tighten as Cloud's muscle spasms died off and he slammed in harder, trusting that the recent orgasm was enough to stave off any discomfort Cloud might feel. He cried out in satisfaction as he came, curling his toes and twisting his free fingers through Cloud's hair.

Breathing heavily, Sephiroth reached down again to ease his softening cock out of Cloud's body, making sure the condom didn't slip. His hands shook as he grabbed a tissue to wrap around the used condom. He got it off and tossed it in the trash, then turned back to Cloud.

His eyes were shut and his mouth was partially open; Sephiroth could feel his heart pounding as he eased him into his arms and kissed his ear. "Are you okay?"

Cloud nodded and pressed himself closer to Sephiroth's chest. "Do I have to go back to my room?" he asked quietly.

"No, of course not." Sephiroth hugged him tightly and rubbed his back. "Stay here. I've got you."

Cloud nodded again and snaked an arm around Sephiroth's waist, twining his hand through his hair. "Thank you."