Okay all Another Fem Merlin fic.I hope you all like it. The title comes from a song on the Sucker Punch soundtrack. I love that soundtrack, but when I heard this song, it just gave me this brilliant idea, along with a picture that was done by Princess Falling Star on Deviant Art. Also, this fic starts in the episode "The Changeling" in season three, but Morgana is on the side of good and was never missing for a year, because I like good Morgana. Just imagine the whole Arwen development as being fem Merlin/Arthur development instead. Anywho, I hope you all enjoy the fic.

SUMMARY: When Merlin finds herself pregnant with Arthur's child, she is forced to leave Camelot by Uther, so that Arthur will never know. Years later, Merlin's daughter, Freya, arrives in Camelot. But where is Merlin? What happened to her? Does Freya have her mother's 'gifts' and will Uther realise the truth of who Freya is? Fem Merlin.

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Sing Me To Sleep.

Chapter 1.

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Sing me to sleep,
sing me to sleep,
I'm tired and I,
I want to go to bed.

Sing me to sleep,
sing me to sleep,
and then leave me alone.

Don't try to wake me in the morning,
'cause I will be gone,
don't feel bad for me,
I want you to know,
deep in the cell of my heart,
I will feel so glad to go.

Sing me to sleep,
sing me to sleep,
I don't want to wake up,
on my own anymore.

Sing to me,
sing to me,
I don't want to wake up,
on my own anymore.

Don't feel bad for me,
I want you to know,
deep in the cell of my heart,
I really want to go.

Sing me to sleep,
sing me to sleep.

There is another world,
there is a better world,
well, there must be,
there must be,
there is another world,
there is a better world.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Merlin loved Arthur. She could admit that much. But she wasn't going to be used. She stormed into Arthur's chambers that morning after the gathering of the royal court. She looked at Arthur. It seemed like forever since she had come to Camelot and become Arthur's maidservant. It seemed that they had always been in love. But now Merlin had no idea what to do.

"You're getting married?" Merlin asked.

"If I had a choice I wouldn't be." Arthur replied.

"Why didn't you say anything to me?" Merlin asked.

"Because you are a servant." Arthur replied icily. Merlin bit her lip, her hands trembling.

"Is that all I am Arthur?" Merlin asked softly, feeling her heart shatter.

"We had fun Merlin, but it's over. I'll do my duty to Camelot and you'll find someone to look after you. I'm sure." Arthur replied.

"Mistresses get looked after, Arthur Pendragon. You might as well call me a whore, and the Gods know I've never been one." Merlin hissed angrily, wanting to slap Arthur's face. She didn't wait for Arthur to say anything else. "I hope you have a happy life together, Sire." Merlin said softly. Then she left the room. She felt unwell as it was. Exhaustion crept through every bone in her body and she found herself feeling sick every day. She couldn't seem to keep any food down. If she did, she wasn't aware of it. Yet Merlin knew she was gaining weight, and no matter what she did, she couldn't get the vile taste of metal from out of her mouth. Merlin had decided to speak to Gaius. He was the only one who would be able to tell her what was wrong with her. But first, she had to go and pick herbs for him. Her old uncle just wasn't as spry as he used to be. She decided to go and do it now while Arthur prepared to go and woo Princess Elena. After all, there was only so much a heart could be broken, and Merlin felt she'd had enough for one day.

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Morgana sighed as she looked at Arthur, who seemed miserable.

"Arthur, you love Merlin. Why are you going through with this charade? You can't just marry anyone your father wants you to." Morgana stated. Arthur looked at Morgana sadly.

"I... just don't have a choice Morgana. The security of the Kingdom apparently rests on the shoulders of this union." Arthur replied.

"You don't deserve her Arthur." Morgana said sadly as she thought back to her dreams. She knew that telling Arthur would be pointless. Arthur never listened to her when she tried to tell him about her dreams.

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As Merlin collected herbs for her uncle, she saw Grunhilda, Elena's Nanny, wandering in the woods. Suddenly, Merlin was horrified to realise that the woman was using her tongue to capture flies. Merlin went to tell her Uncle Gaius of the development, completely forgetting she wanted to speak to him about her own health.

xXxXxXx TWO DAYS LATER xXxXxXx

Merlin had managed to thwart the Sidhe in their plans to place a changeling queen on the throne of Camelot, destroyed a pixie Grunhilda, and all before Arthur's supposed marriage, whilst doing all her chores and duties for Gaius. All of this whilst avoiding speaking to Arthur as much as was possible. Merlin went to Gaius, the day before Arthur's wedding, to finally discuss her ailments with her Uncle. Gaius looked pale as he examined Merlin and nodded sadly.

"Merlin you're pregnant." Gaius told Merlin sadly. Merlin felt like a bucket of ice water had been thrown over her head. Icy fingers of dread crept up and down her spine.

"Are you sure Uncle?" Merlin asked. Gaius nodded.

"The father?" Gaius asked, his concern for his dear niece visually reflected in his features.

"Arthur is the father." Merlin replied. That was when the door opened to reveal Uther Pendragon, who glowered at Merlin angrily.

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Uther looked at Merlin as he realised that separating her from Arthur would be harder then he thought. But his plans for Arthur's future as well as the future of Camelot, were in jeopardy if the girl stayed. He hadn't originally come to Gaius' chambers looking for Merlin. But now he would have to deal with her.

"You say your child is my son's?" Uther asked coldly. Merlin stood from where she'd been sitting.

"Arthur is marrying another tomorrow and he doesn't care for me any longer. I doubt that anything I have to say will make any difference." Merlin replied. Uther glared at her knowing differently. Should Arthur learn Merlin was pregnant with his child, then Arthur wouldn't marry Elena. He would demand to marry Merlin instead. It would be oh so easy to kill Merlin. It would be simpler too, after all, no Merlin meant no child and no threat to Camelot's wealth, and no threat to the throne being graced with a peasant queen. However, Uther knew that if he killed Merlin merely for being pregnant that he would become the monster that many believed him to be. Despite many things, Uther knew that Merlin was not a liar. The child she carried was surely Arthur's. Uther couldn't bring himself to have her executed, as well as his own grandchild at the same time. But he also couldn't have a peasant marrying his son. That and Gaius loved the girl. She was his niece, and Uther couldn't imagine how Gaius would feel to lose her to the executioner's axe.

"You will leave Camelot before the dawn breaks tomorrow, or I will have you executed." Uther said coldly.

"What will you execute me for sire?" Merlin asked. Her own voice laced with ice.

"Whatever first comes to my mind." Uther shot back.

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Merlin felt more ice run down her back as she placed a protective hand over her stomach. She couldn't allow herself to be executed. She had to protect her child.

"Sire!" Gaius exclaimed, seeming angry.

"Gaius, it is only because of you that I don't execute her. I will not have her jeopardise everything I have worked for." Uther stated. Merlin knew that fighting Uther was pointless, and besides, Arthur no longer wanted her. He had said as much. Her heart had already been broken. She nodded her understanding and only then did Uther leave the room.

"It's alright Uncle Gaius. I probably would've had to leave anyway. Just... just don't tell anyone until after I'm gone and don't tell anyone that I'm pregnant." Merlin said softly. She explained what had happened two days before. Gaius looked stricken at the thought that Arthur would hurt Merlin in such a way.

"Arthur didn't mean what he said to you Merlin. I'm sure of it." Gaius replied.

"I don't know how much that matters anymore." Merlin replied. "I'll be leaving tonight, as soon as I can pack my things." Merlin added.

"But what about your destiny Merlin?" Gaius asked.

"My child is more important than my destiny. If it's all meant to happen it will. If I'm truly meant to help Arthur build a great kingdom then I will. I've learned that trying to force anything or trying to change things isn't possible. Destiny will happen with time. Right now my child needs to come first. I won't risk Uther's anger. I would be putting my baby's life in danger and I can't do that. I won't count on Uther's mercy because he has none." Merlin said sadly. Gaius watched as Merlin packed her meagre possessions and the magic book. She looked at Gaius as she threw her pack onto her back. "I will let you know where I end up Uncle Gaius. I won't go home. That's the first place anyone would think to look for me if Uther changes his mind and decides to have me killed." Merlin told Gaius calmly. Gaius nodded his understanding.

"Shall I write to your mother?" Gaius asked. Merlin nodded.

"Let her know that I'll find a way to contact her when I find somewhere to settle. You've been so much more than a father to me." Merlin said to her old Uncle. The pair embraced and then Merlin left, not wanting to risk her child's life to Uther's mercy.

xXxXxXx THE NEXT MORNING xXxXxXx

Arthur stood in front of Gaiuis' chambers, readying himself to knock on the door and apologise to Merlin. He needed to explain everything to her. Calling off the wedding was the truest thing he had done since Lord Godwin had come to visit with Elena. Arthur knocked and entered the physician's chambers. Gaius was looking into the fireplace sadly.

"Gaius?" Arthur called. The old man jumped as he looked at Arthur. Then Gaius shook his head sadly.

"If you're looking for Merlin she isn't here. She left Camelot last night." Gaius said sadly.

"Where did she go?" Arthur looked to see Morgana behind him.

"She was banished yesterday afternoon by your father." Gaius replied sadly. The old man had tears in his eyes that he didn't let fall. Arthur and Morgana looked horrified as they left to ask Uther why he had banished Merlin, especially when she hadn't done anything, or without allowing her to say goodbye to them.

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Merlin had been travelling for a while. She wasn't quite sure where to head, but she felt this need to speak to Kilgarrah first. After all, the dragon was usually helpful, even if he spoke in riddles. Merlin had walked all that night and all the next day, only stopping to eat and rest for a little while before moving on. She couldn't call Kilgarrah in the middle of the day. Any scouts that spotted him would run straight to Uther with the information. She decided to keep walking until the moon was up, then stop at a clearing to call Kilgarrah.

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Arthur and Morgana walked into the council room where Uther was sat going over papers. Lord Godwin had left and Arthur and Morgana had both given their best wishes to Elena. She'd been surprisingly calm and happy that she wouldn't marry someone she didn't love. Uther looked at Morgana and Arthur as they stood in the room, and the doors closed behind them.

"Is there a problem?" Uther asked. He still wasn't happy that Arthur had chosen not to marry Elena.

"Why did you banish Merlin?" Morgana asked furiously. Uther hadn't counted on Gaius telling Morgana and Arthur that he'd banished Merlin. He hadn't thought to tell him not to speak of it to Arthur and Morgana. A brainwave went through Uther's mind as he thought about what to tell his children.

"I banished her for the crime of sorcery. I would have executed her, but I've taken the number of times she's saved your life into account Arthur, and her loyal service. Banishment is a fitting punishment where death is the usual sentence." Uther replied. If they thought that Merlin was a magic user, there wasn't much chance of them going to look for her. At least that was Uther's hope.

xXxXxXx LATE THAT NIGHT xXxXxXx

Merlin had finally stopped to take a much needed rest before she called for Kilgarrah. When she called him, it didn't seem take long for him arrive, his wings spread and he landed gracefully in the clearing.

"Merlin? What is it that you want?" Kilgarrah asked. Merlin sighed as she looked at the old dragon.

"I've been banished from Camelot and I'm carrying Arthur's child." Merlin said. She waited for Kilgarrah to digest the information she had just given him.

"This is indeed a turn of events." Kilgarrah replied. He looked at Merlin carefully. "Your child will be powerful. Indeed not as powerful as you, but no other can be that powerful. Go to the druids in Escetia and they will help you when the time comes for your child to be born." Kilgarrah replied. Merlin thought for a moment before looking up at Kilgarrah.

"How do I find them?" Merlin asked. Kilgarrah lowered his snout to the ground.

"Climb on my back and I will take you to their camp. You should not be travelling on foot all alone in your condition. You need to keep your strength." Kilgarrah replied. Merlin smiled up at the dragon and did as he asked. Soon they were flying through the night sky.

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Gwen and Morgana were both looking out Morgana's window that night.

"Do you think that Merlin is alright?" Gwen asked Morgana. Morgana took in a deep breath of fresh air before she closed the window.

"I hope so." Morgana replied. There was a knock at the door and Gwen went to open it. Arthur stood there.

"Come in." Morgana told him quickly. She looked at Arthur as Gwen shut the door behind him.

"Do you really believe that Merlin is a magic user?" Arthur asked Morgana softly.

"The question isn't whether I believe Merlin practises magic. The question is whether that makes any difference in your feelings towards her." Morgana replied. Arthur nodded his understanding and the trio sat together in silence.

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On the back of Kilgarrah, the journey to the druid camp didn't take too long. When Merlin arrived, she saw Iseldir standing in the clearing.

"I knew you were coming Emrys. It is good to see you alive and well." Iseldir said kindly. Merlin smiled at the elder druid. She looked at Kilgarrah.

"Is there anything I should know?" Merlin asked. The dragon cocked his head to the side and spread his mouth into a wide, toothy grin.

"When your time comes I would like to know." Kilgarrah replied. "After all, you are my kin, and so too is your child." Kilgarrah added. Merlin nodded her understanding and Kilgarrah took off. She looked at Iseldir.

"I'm sorry for dropping in like this without letting you know." Merlin said. Iseldir smiled.

"It's quite alright Emrys. Our people are overjoyed to be able to host the great Emrys in her time of need." Iseldir replied.

"Do you know why I'm here?" Merlin asked. Some druids seemed to know things before she did.

"I do indeed. A new child is always a blessing." Iseldir replied. Merlin had a feeling she would be happy here. At least for now.

xXxXxXx SIX MONTHS LATER xXxXxXx

Arthur, had already ridden to Ealdor to look for Merlin, but Hunith had no idea where her daughter was. Merlin had simply disappeared. There was no trace of her anywhere. Arthur found that he didn't care if Merlin had magic or not. He just wanted her back.

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Merlin was sure today was the day she would give birth. Her stomach had become large and the druid children were forever running over to place their small hands on it so they could feel the kicking of Merlin's child. They treated Merlin as though she were a holy being, and the coming of her child was being treated as a holy sign from the Gods. Merlin felt silly when she thought about it. After all, she was just Merlin. But to the druids she was Emrys, the saviour of magic. Suddenly, Merlin felt a trickle of water run down her leg. She blinked as she realised that this was what she'd been waiting for. She'd seen it happen to other women, back in Ealdor. Though she had expected there to be more of a gush of water. But she had been reading old medical texts that she borrowed from Gaius every so often. She would use her magic to go backwards and forwards between Camelot to sit with Gaius and talk to him, or to go and see her mother. The druids had taught her a great deal. She had even met other magical people in her travels with the druids, and slowly, her name, her druid name, was becoming famous. Her own name was known to very few. Only Iseldir knew her birth name, the other druids were not concerned with her birth name. They were more than happy enough to just call her Emrys. Merlin used her magic to call Kilgarrah before going to find Aileena, the druid midwife.

xXxXxXx EIGHT HOURS LATER xXxXxXx

Merlin found she was in agony. The sweat dripped from her forehead as she growled out her pain. She almost felt like she was going to die but then scolded herself mentally.

"Women have been giving birth since the beginning of humankind, and surviving the ordeal with a lot less help then I've got now. So stop being so overdramatic." Merlin thought to herself as she grit her teeth and bore down. She couldn't recall hardly any of what was said to her during her labour, but as soon as she had given birth, everything was a rush of clear images. She heard her child cry for the first time and cried with relief. Her baby was strong and healthy.

"It's a girl, Emrys." Aileena said clearly. Merlin smiled as she saw Aileena examine her daughter and bathe her. Then, after what seemed like an eternity, Merlin finally had her daughter in her arms. "What will you name her?" Aileena asked.

"Freya." Merlin replied. She looked down at her dark haired daughter. "Her name is Freya."

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Okay that's it for this chapter. Next chapter will skip ahead to series four. So Freya will be... two years old I think. Because there's a year gap between series three and four. Anywho, let's just say for the sake of it that we're skipping two years and will be in series four next chapter.