I do not own any characters mentioned in this story. All my works are self-beta done, so any mistakes found belong to me. Happy Mother's Day, 2012!

Mother's Day

I once had a mother. But then she died. She died only a few short seconds after my father did. That day will forever haunt me. The blood that surrounded hear as she tried to speak, but couldn't.

I think about it at times. On certain occasions such as the anniversary, or her birthday, or the day they got married, or even on my own birthday. Sometimes I don't even have a reason to think about it. I just do. One moment, I'm laughing and just enjoying myself. The next, I'm either close to tears or already crying. I can't help but cry. She was my mother. I watched her die. I couldn't do anything to stop it from happening. All I could do was cry, cry, cry…

I know it wasn't my fault; it was Tony Zucco's. But sometimes, even knowing that, I can't help but blame myself for it. I know I shouldn't and have no reason for it, but I do. I can't help it. I have to. I don't know why, but I just do. There are some things I do that, no matter how hard I try, I just can't understand why I do. Sometimes I think that I may be a psychopath in training or something.

If it was Father's Day, it would be different. Of course then I would be bawling over my father instead. But at least on Father's Day I could go to see Bruce and, for just a few hours, consider him my father for the day. Bruce makes me feel better on Father's Day because it is on that day I have one father that is still alive. And I know I make him feel better on that day because it is on that day that he is a father and I am his son. Usually, he never refers to me as his son. But on that day, I know he wants to. And that makes feel so good because it is love. Father and son time, that day. But it is not Father's Day. No, it is Mother's Day. A day upon which I do not have someone to visit and utter those three common words in dedication of the day. Bruce is my second father, but I only have a single mother who is dead. She's dead. So who is my mother now? I do not have one. I am motherless.

I miss her. Every day I wake up and feel a deep pain. A sorrow that won't go away. Throughout the day, I try to ignore it and keep it down. But by the end of each day, the pain grown to the point where it has consumed me whole and I can hardly breathe. It just hurts so much. I could never tell Bruce. He would just think I was weak and needed to toughen up more. But I'm sensitive. I know it and I'll admit it. Things can really get to that can't even reach Bruce's surface. But then again, a lot of things don't reach his surface even though they should. That is why I get so depressed at times. It's almost as if it comes out of nowhere. Sometimes it's stronger than at other times. Sometimes it's too strong. It scares me more than I could ever say, which only makes it even stronger.

It's been so long before I've seen her in person. I'm afraid that I'm starting to forget the sound of her voice. I don't want to ever forget. I want to always have her voice, her laughter, in my head, distracting me from what I'm doing and calling me to it. I want it so badly, so, so badly.

I don't have a mother this or any following Mother's Day to hug and tell her how much she means to me. No, I don't. But I do have a second father who doesn't have a mother either. I can't just sit here, mourning. I have to go see Bruce. We have to mourn together. That's the way it's always worked. The company of one another is comforting enough to almost, almost make things okay for just a fraction of a second.

I no longer have a mother, but I have a father. And I'm going to take advantage of that. I love you, Mom. Happy Mother's Day.