Now it's Time For…..

Ranting with Edward Elric

*drum roll*

Here he is folks…..Edward Elric!

Ed: Thank you! Thank you! *bows* It's time for another show of Ranting with Edward Elric.

*Fan girls screaming for joy. And Armstrong crying for joy*

Ed: Okaaaay * awkward silence * *coughs* Lets begin….. So today I will be ranting about….. Edward Cullen. And maybe milk too if Mustang doesn't try to take over the show again. * glares at back curtain*

*muffled* Roy: Why does he get another show with him the star? I want my own show. Heck I want my own movie. Ed has had two movies with the leading part!

*muffled* Riza: Sir…. *sighs* It is called Fullmetal Alchemist. And it is because the fan girls go crazier for Ed than you.

*muffled* Havoc: I'm with the boss! Chief gets to much attention. Where is our cut in the deal?

* You hear gun shots*

*muffled* Riza: There is your cut *glares* *comes out* you can continue Ed. *leaves*

Ed: *shakes head* you see what I have to work with. Any way lets really begin. Edward Cullen all we have similar is that we both have the name Edward and we both have gold eyes. But my eyes are real and better looking. *smirks* I'm cuter, smarter, alive, and sexier than Cullen. Who needs sparkles when you have automail! So I am way better than Edward Cullen the sparkle fairy vampire.

Cullen: *comes out* Hey! *growls* I'm the better Edward. I sparkle, I play piano, and I am taller than you shorty.

Ed: WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SUPER SMALL BEAN THAT NOT EVEN AN ANT CAN FIND?

Al: *comes out* Brother he didn't say that *sighs*

Ed: *growls* you are going to get it Cullen!

Cullen: what can a shorty do? Huh midget?

*Ed lunges at Cullen*

*screen fades out and in and you see Ed beating Cullen*

*You hear Ed calling Roy*

Ed: Mustang get off your lazy but over here and set the sparkle bitch on fire!

Roy: *head pops out behind the curtain* can I get my own part in this show?

Ed: *sighs* If you set him on fire then I'll give you a ten minute part every two weeks. Ok?

Roy: That's a start. *comes out* *sets Cullen on fire with his fire alchemy* there you go Fullmetal * thinking: a miniskirt segment, a miniskirt segment* *chuckles*

Ed and Riza: *shakes heads*

Well that's all for today seeing as our set is destroyed again.

Ed and Al: see you next on Ranting with Edward Elric

Ed: Our next show will be me ranting about Winry and her wrenches.

Al: Don't you mean you'll talk about how much you love her? *chuckles*

Ed: Al! *blushes a little*

Al: Or do you love Mustang? *chuckles*

Ed: Al! *blushes a lot*

(End of the show)

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or Twilight. I do not own the characters. Thank you for reading and please review.