The promo from Global when Sam says "All you wanted was to keep being a cop and all I wanted was you" inspired me to write this story. The line is a piece of genius writing, in my opinion, but it's also heartbreaking hearing Sam say it. So, my mind started throwing around all these ideas about the rest of that conversation and the Sam & Andy storyline in the first episode based on all the various clips….and this is the result. It's a one-shot. Enjoy and leave a review to let me know what you think (even if you think my take on things is totally crazy)! :)

Disclaimer: I don't own Rookie Blue (and if I did the first episode of this season would totally not be as angsty as it appears it's gonna be. lol)


All I Wanted Was You

Sam leaned against the hood of his cruiser. He wasn't ready to get out on patrol yet, and the chatter he'd heard that Andy was at the station made him want to stick around. He knew her meeting with the tribunal was scheduled for the afternoon and she was probably nervous, and he desperately wanted to see her, to ease her mind that it wouldn't be that bad. He'd sat in front of the tribunal the day before so he knew what she'd be facing. But he was nervous to see her again, and a bit worried, if he would admit it to himself. They'd barely spoken since the night he was rescued and he dropped her off at Traci's.

They'd been ordered not to see each other during the suspension and much to Sam's surprise Andy had abided by it. He'd called her, texted her, seen her from afar at The Penny, but she'd barely say anything or respond with only a couple of words. He'd been okay with being suspended when he thought it meant he could spend much of that time with Andy, even if they had to do it secretly. But he soon found himself without her and very lonely, and he didn't know what to make of any of it. All he knew was he had to see her, had to talk to her.

When he heard the back door of the station open and close, he looked up and saw Andy walking across the parking lot. He stood up and she stopped as she neared him.

"Didn't expect to see you here," he said.

She hadn't wanted to see him yet, not here in the middle of the station's parking lot, not before her tribunal. She needed to get through that first, get her job back first. But here he was, standing in front of her, the closest they'd been in three months. "Had to see Frank, and Traci offered me a ride on her way in."

They stared at each other in silence and Andy shifted uncomfortably between her feet. "I should, uh, I should go."

"Let me give you a ride," he offered, waving a hand toward his cruiser.

"It's okay, I'm just gonna walk. My condo isn't far."

"C'mon, let me take you home."

She shouldn't. She couldn't. But technically her suspension ended today, and she was at work. They couldn't hold seeing him at work against her, right? She sighed, but relented and gently nodded her head. "Okay."

They slid into the seats of the cruiser and for several minutes silence engulfed the car.

"So, you go before the tribunal this afternoon." It was more of a statement then a question since they both knew that he already knew the answer.

"Yeah," she said, looking down at her fidgeting fingers, not wanting to look him in the eye. She knew if she did, those deep brown eyes of his would melt her and she'd pour her heart out, and end up at her meeting with tears streaming down her face and red, puffy eyes.

"It's going to be okay," Sam said, stealing a quick glance at her before his eyes returned to the road.

"You don't know that. And it's easy to say when you're already back in uniform." It came out harsher than she meant it and she silently cursed herself for allowing him to drive her home. Being this close to him threw her mind into a tailspin, definitely not what she needed before facing the tribunal.

"Andy," he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "My meeting with the tribunal was yesterday. It's not like I've been back for long. And if they reinstated me, they'll reinstate you."

"You're a senior officer. Everyone loves you. You're the golden boy of undercover. It's easy to reinstate you. I'm a rookie. The rookie that keeps screwing up," she said.

"You're not a rookie anymore."

"That's not what everyone keeps reminding me."

"You'll be fine. Just go in there confident."

"Or humble," she countered. "I've learned my lesson, the hard way. I won't make the same mistake again."

"So, that's what it was, a mistake?" It hurt him that she considered what happened between them a mistake. "What happened to 'no going back'?"

"That's not what I mean. Being stupid, breaking the rules, following my heart instead of my head. It got me, us, into trouble. I won't let it happen again," she replied.

Sam looked over at her, not sure how to read into what she was saying. And for the first time, he couldn't understand the expression on her face. Having kept his eyes on her longer than he should have, when his eyes returned to the road, it was too late to avoid hitting a blue van stopped in the middle of the road.

Moments after impact, smoke was surrounding the front of the cruiser. Sam looked around and put a hand on Andy's arm. "You okay?"

"Yeah," she said dazed from the crash. "Sam, the van's on fire." He followed her gaze and quickly jumped out of the car to get the fire extinguisher from the trunk. While he put the fire out, Andy got out of the cruiser and looked in the window of the van. She was still out of sorts from the shock of the accident, but she thought she saw a girl inside the back of the van.

Andy opened the driver's side door and was about to help the man out, when she felt Sam's hand tug on her arm. "You can't be helping. You're a civilian right now," he said.

"You've got to be kidding. You can't do everything yourself. I'm here, I can help," she pleaded.

"I've called for backup. You shouldn't be helping." He gently moved her out of the way, so he could check on the driver and get him out of the van.

Ignoring Sam's orders, Andy opened the back doors of the van and found a young girl. She helped her out of the van as she heard another cruiser pull up to the scene. She sat the girl down on the curb and went to talk to Traci and Dov, and when she looked back, the girl had disappeared. She looked in the van, thinking the girl might have gone back for something, but she wasn't there.

A few minutes later, Sam stood in front of Andy.

"You're bleeding," he said concerned. He looked at a small cut on her forehead.

"It's nothing."

They stared at each other and all Andy could think was that this accident was caused by them. Sam had gotten distracted because of their conversation in the cruiser. She'd had a lot of time to think during the last three months and she'd worried about this, their personal life affecting their jobs. She closed her eyes briefly as she sighed, and walked past Sam.


The investigation into the accident went quickly, but Andy knew Sam was pissed she insisted on helping. But she was stubborn. So, she saw it through in just enough time to change into her uniform before her meeting with the tribunal.

And here she stood, at the end of a long table where senior members of the Toronto Police Department would determine her fate. She listened as one of them read the reasoning of why she had been suspended, the mistakes she had made. She remained still, ready to plead her case.

"You understand what you did was wrong?" the man at the end of the table asked.

"Yes, sir. I was careless and realize what I did was stupid and I violated the rules. I am truly sorry for what I've done," she said.

"Part of the mandate of your suspension was that you would have no contact with each other." She wasn't sure if he was asking a question or what Sam might have told them the day before.

"That's right." There had been a couple texts, a couple phone calls. But he had initiated them and it took all of her willpower to respond in a way that would end the conversations quickly. She just hoped Sam had kept that information to himself.

"And?"

"I haven't seen him until today. When I arrived at the station, he was already there," she replied.

All eyes in the room were on her and it was making her even more nervous. But she knew they were trying to determine if she was telling the truth.

The man at the end of the table continued speaking, but all she heard was that she was reinstated. She could go back to the job she loved tomorrow, and she couldn't wait to see Sam when she got back to the station.


She arrived back at the station overwhelmed and sat down on the stairs to think. She knew once she walked down the hallway in front of her she'd see everyone – her friends, her co-workers, her superiors – and she needed a moment alone.

That moment didn't last long when she saw Sam round the corner and begin down the hallway. She jumped up and quickly caught up to him. "I'm back!" she said excitedly.

He glanced quickly over his shoulder at her, but didn't stop walking. "Great."

"Sam…"

"What?"

"I just…"

He looked over his shoulder at her and decided to put it all out there. "All you wanted was to keep being a cop and all I wanted was you." He didn't know how else to say it. It was what he thought was the truth. He thought about her every day. His heart ached for her. And she wanted nothing to do with him. He thought what they shared in his undercover apartment had been special, but now he was pretty sure those feelings were one-sided. And now those feelings were locked securely behind a brick wall he'd built up throughout the day.

She looked at him dumbfounded, wondering how he could think that's how she felt. He kept walking and when she reached out for his arm, he tugged it away. "How could you think that?" she demanded.

"What else am I supposed to think?" He stopped suddenly and turned around to face her. "You risked your job today to follow a lead on a case when you weren't even supposed to be working, but you wouldn't do the same to see me."

"We couldn't."

"Like you haven't broken the rules before," he said flippantly.

"That's what got us into this situation. You might've been prepared to break the rules, but I wasn't. I needed to prove I could take this job seriously. And I needed to prove that I could stay away from you when you go undercover again," she explained.

"Prove to who?"

"To them, to myself."

He blew out a breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I gotta go. Congratulations on being reinstated." With that, he stormed off down the hall and left Andy standing alone and on the verge of tears.

She slowly made her way to the locker room and changed. This day hadn't gone how she planned. She fully expected to bring Sam home with her, to show him her new condo, to make up for lost time. She never expected to be walking out of the station alone, with Sam nowhere in sight.


Andy returned to her condo, tossing the paperwork from her tribunal meeting on the coffee table. She should be happier after getting her job back. But she kept replaying her conversation with Sam and his "All you wanted was to keep being a cop and all I wanted was you" comment. The statement was half true, she supposed. She did want to keep being a cop. It was in her blood. But she also wanted Sam, like she had never wanted someone before. And that's why she wouldn't let herself sneak around with him during their suspension. Because she'd never want to leave his arms and she would have used him to run away from all her problems. She'd have him, but nothing else in her life would be normal. And, what she told him about wanting to prove to herself that she could be away from him was true. She knew he'd go undercover again and she couldn't have everyone, including her, thinking that she'd possibly ruin another one of his undercover assignments. Hell, he might not even be given another one because of her inability to stay away from him. So, she'd kept her distance like they'd been ordered. But she couldn't bare the hurt written all over his face when she finally saw him again. It tore her up inside.

For three months she'd thought about Sam and what they were, what they could be. She realized she needed him like she needed to breath.

She decided she needed to go see him, to explain. She'd make him listen to her, even if he didn't want to. But first, she needed a shower to watch off the emotional and physical dirt of the day, and give herself a new start.

She was dressed, but still in the bathroom, when she heard a knock at the door. She smiled when she saw Sam standing in her doorway. "Come in."

Sam gazed around the condo as he walked in. "Nice place."

"Thanks." She bit her bottom lip nervously and ran a hand through her wet hair. "I was coming to see you."

"Andy…"

She shifted uncomfortably, her eyes glued to the floor. "It wasn't fair, you know, what you said. You wanted to be a cop again too, not just me."

"But I wanted you more."

"I wanna have it all," she said, finally looking up at him and grasping his fingers with hers. Was it possible? Could they have it all? they both wondered.

"How...Why...Was it just that easy for you to stay away?"

"No. But I didn't want to screw up," she said quietly.

"Again with the job. This is what I meant, Andy." He pulled his hand from her grasp and stepped back.

"I'm talking about us, Sam. I'm so worried about screwing things up with us that it's exactly what I'm doing. Staying away from you was one of the hardest things I've done, but I did it because I thought it was best for us. What kind of relationship starts with sneaking around? We wouldn't have been able to be normal." She flopped down on the couch and buried her face in her hands.

Suddenly things began to fall into place for Sam. People sneaking around, meeting in secret. That sounded more like someone cheating than a loving relationship. But a part of him was still worried about her feelings for him. The person who said time and space didn't work for her, went along with just that too easily. "You weren't running away from us?"

"I thought I'd be running away from life if I saw you. Burying my head in the sand and ignoring everything we did wrong." She stood up and began to pace the room; Sam's eyes bounced back and forth like he was watching a tennis match.

"Being a cop is the one constant in my life. Ever since I was a kid, it's who I wanted to be," she continued. "People disappoint, people leave, but being a cop, preparing and training for this job…it's always been there for me. It's hard to put at risk the one constant in my life for something, someone…"

"I'm not like other people. I'm not going to leave you. Maybe you can put some of your trust in me," he said, walking over to her, which forced her to stop pacing.

"I trust you with my life. And now we have a clean slate. We finally have the chance to actually start over," she said, while her eyes pleaded for him to understand. "Start from the beginning, do it right. I don't want the story of how our relationship started to include you getting tortured or us sneaking around while we were suspended."

"So, how do you want it to start?" The words escaped his mouth in a husky voice.

"With me telling you that all I've ever wanted was you. There is no one else for me." She stared into his eyes, determined to make him realize how much she cared about him.

His hands circled her waist and pulled her close. "You're all I've thought about, every day for three months," he admitted. Their faces inched closer until he could nuzzle his nose with hers. He hesitated, his lips stopping just short of hers for several moments, but as his hand came up to her jaw he crushed his mouth onto hers.

As the kiss deepened, their hands roamed each other's bodies as if they needed to re-learn what the other felt like. Andy pulled Sam with her as she walked backward into her bedroom. He pushed her gently down on the bed and crawled on top of her, placing kisses along her jaw and neck before reclaiming her lips.


When Sam got out of bed to get some water, Andy wrapped a sheet around herself and stared straight up at the ceiling. "Oh. My. God," she said, wondering where the willpower came from to deprive herself of this for three months, three very long months. "That was…"

"Amazing." He finished her sentence as he climbed back on the bed.

"Yeah," she agreed as he leaned down to kiss her. As the sun began to set, she lost herself in the kiss.


The End.