The Bleeding Stars
Disclaimer: I do not own Soul Eater or any of the characters.
Author's Note: So this is my very first Soul Eater piece of work I just watched the anime series and I have become a huge fan! I'm a huge fan of the Soul x Spirit pairing, and all the stories out there are really good, but they don't seem to be too many of them, hence why I write this. Please enjoy and let me know what you think
"The stars are bleeding tonight" I chuckle softly to myself. That was the very first thing he said on our first night together. In fact, he's still fond of saying it. As I gazed up at into the billowing black velvet of the sky, I gave thought to the possibility that maybe he's right – against all the scientific proof that I never bothered with as a kid, my head goes into overdrive as it thinks the celestial bodies, wounded by some divine force to spread their angelic blood across the galaxies. The imagery's a little gory for my taste, but I can still appreciate the dark poetic license behind his thinking. He's never been one to sugarcoat his words to ease the blow: he's always been the one person I've met in my entire life that needs honesty like the air he breathes. Others just write him off as a cynic, but I've learnt to see past that. Instead of the dripping sarcasm, I see truth, the wondrous clarity that had eluded me for so long. It's actually kind of funny, because I'm so much older than him, but he's taught me to feel life as teacher would guide his student. I allowed myself a sad smile, seeing the stars die above me in a spectacular array of lights. "I wonder if you'll see through my lie" I murmur, feeling my sentence carry itself on the warm evening air to some unknown destination. One final look at stars is all I need to reinforce my knowledge of his most important lesson… everything has an end. The colors of life do not go on painting themselves forever, neither does emotion. One day, even Death himself will cease to exist and move on to the next great adventure. It's those tentative first steps into the big unknown that makes humans so afraid of change. People don't realize that those baby footprints they make in a new chapter in their lives don't have to be anything profound, and that's what makes them cling to past all the more. A new beginning doesn't have to be something special; it just has to be something. I know all of this, and yet it's still so hard for me to say goodbye. The both of us always knew that this would one day come to an end; that our secret little affair would blossom in the precious little moments we shared until someone got hurt. "I'm a sentimental old fool after all" I whispered. "But what else am I supposed to feel when I love so much?"
A sudden pain explodes through my chest, rising and falling in magnificent crescendos until it eventually wasted away. I can sense he's close somewhere nearby, but I still wish he wouldn't come. The only reason I'm here myself in the first place is to pay respect to this particular relationship, and lay it to rest once and for all. Seeing the injured fury in those eyes would make me lose my resolve, but I have to stay strong… for her sake. I can be an unfaithful lover, but never an unfaithful father. As much as she hates me right now, I can tell that deep down, there's a little part that still cares for her Papa, and it's the part I can never afford to lose. I still have a long way to go in earning back the trust I had so blatantly violated, and if she ever knew about us, I'll lose my little girl forever. In the long run, he's better off with her too. Granted, it took a hell of a long time to for the two of them to come together, but underneath all that romance is years of unquestioned loyalty. I'm ashamed to admit it, but I've always been jealous of them. Her fire suits his ice so incredibly well, it devastates me whenever I see the two of them together, knowing I'll never have the privilege of sharing even fraction of that with him. How sick is it that a father is envious of the most treasured girl in his life? I've lost count of the number of sleepless nights I've spent just brooding over that alone. I'm a failure to her, and the only way to redeem myself now is to fail him. It was always going to come down to this I suppose, the only question was when.
My ears perk as they picked up on the angry patter of footsteps marching towards me. I can't see him yet, but already his anger is so tangible. I spun around the small patch of rooftop, looking for a way to make a quick exit, but the only way out is to face him. My heart dances anxiously in my chest, nearly writhing out of my chest. I let out a deep exhalation to calm myself, wiping away a lock of crimson hair away from my eyes. My sight sets itself on the wooden door in front of me, as I stood there, waiting for the only person who had the power to kill me without lifting a single finger. Eternity after eternity passes, but it's still too short, the footsteps getting louder all the while. "Come on" I say inaudibly, praying for this to be over quickly. In no time, the door opened to reveal my beloved in all of his beautiful wrath. My breath eclipses itself as he pounds the stone blocks under his feet to make his way to me. He's ditched that stupid headband tonight, letting the snow white hair fall softly around his eyes. His expression is pure murder, but he can't hide the desolate heartbreak behind it… not from me.
"You… you are the word's biggest fucking moron!" he hisses, immediately stopping where he stood. My eyes survey every inch of his body before I drop my gaze to the floor. I'm a fully grown man, but I stand before him like a mere child. "I am, aren't I?" I whisper, still feeling the sheer heat of his anger. "A letter?" he spits venomously, taking a step forward. "A fucking letter? You don't have the balls to tell me that you don't love me in person, so you go and write it down? What the hell where you hoping to do?"
"I was hoping it would be less painful for you when I leave."
"Oh, thank you for your politeness! Tell you what Spirit, I'll sleep a lot better tonight because of that!" I lift my head slowly, seeing his chest heave with every cloud of air he took in. He's probably feeling that same paralyzing shoot of pain that I do right about now. The two of us went too far too fast for this to be an amicable split. "I'm sorry Soul."
"Don't say that! Don't you dare fucking say that to me!" he yells. With incredible speed, he blitzed forward until he's right up against me. He lays his hands in the spaces separating the buttons of my shirt and rips it open with a furious roar. My body pulses against the warm embrace of the night air, adjusting itself to its new form of vulnerability. "If you really were sorry, you wouldn't leave the academy" he breathes, letting his hands fall to his sides. "You wouldn't leave me." I look down at the pair of beseeching eyes staring back at me, every trace of their anger erased by the powerful imploring of their gaze. "We both knew that this would end" I say softly, only to rile him up once more. He beats his fists against my bare chest and I surrender to every single hit as some perverted atonement for my actions. "I damn well know what we said!" he cries, never resting from his assault on me. "Just like I fucking know you didn't mean a single word in that letter!" My arms wrap themselves around him, bringing him closer to me. I can feel him resist at first, but with a wounded yelp, he starts to shudder in my embrace, every sob of his punctuating the night. "You think I don't know" he moans into my chest as I place my chin above his head. There's a painful lump caught in my throat as I feel his tears, but I'm too broken to cry right now. "You think I don't know that it must have taken you a hundred times just to write that first sentence."
"You know me too well" I whisper, feeling his head leave my chest. The remains of my shirt have long since floated off my body, leaving my skin open to the burning tears. I feel his head leave my chest to stare brokenly up at me. My hand leaves his side, brushing through the soft forest of icy hair. "Why?" he asks simply before breaking out of my embrace. He parts his lips slightly, drinking in every detail of my body. With ridiculous ease, he lifts up his T-shirt and slips it above his head, carelessly tossing it to the side. I look away in shame. "You know why."
"No, actually I don't. You give me far too much credit old man, you always have." He steps closer to me once more folding his arms around my neck. With a simple pull, I collapse onto him, bouncing our bodies to the floor. I looked down at him in surprise, unable to resist this. I know what he's planning, but I didn't prepare for this and he knows it. "You love me and I love you" he murmurs, his eyes never once leaving mine. "I'll fight for you, even if it means hurting Maka."
I lower my head to his lips, caressing his seductive petals with my own. He moans pleasurably, shooting his tongue forward into my mouth. His heavenly taste sends my mind running blank, devoid of everything except one though – this is the only way I can say goodbye to him, to let him go and send him on the right path. My lips slip from his, traveling down to his neck. A sinful lick lets me taste even more him, while my hand makes quick work his pants and boxers. In one sweeping pull, I render my angel completely naked and hungry for me. My teeth lightly graze the soft flesh, leaving one last mark on him from me – one last reminder that I was here and that this once was called mine. My hand travels up and curve into his mouth. I continue carving my way into my neck with great abandon while his silken tongue runs along my fingers. They withdraw from his mouth as quickly as they came, making their way once more southwards. I push one of them inside, feeling the magnificent heat of his body welcome me. "Nh!" he groans, shutting his eyes in a heady ecstasy. Smirking to myself, I insert another, this time felling his body arch up against my own. He's ready. I pull off him and lower down my pants, my throbbing erection waiting for its prize. "You promised you'd never leave" he pants, watching as I reposition myself above him. His lusty cry combines with my own as I enter him, finally completing the both of us. "I have to Soul" I whisper, fighting off the urge to explode into orgasm right there and then. "I won't hurt my daughter anymore, and I won't let you throw away your life because of me." My hips begin a slow rhythm, as I rock gently against his body. Almost immediately, I feel his member press against my stomach. I lower myself until our faces are mere millimeters apart, losing myself to those begging eyes. I steal a kiss from his lips, relishing it like a precious treasure I found. My hips begin to buck faster, while my free hand grabs hold of his taut erection and begins to pump it. He throws his head back with a curse, unable to fight off this profligate pleasure that we shared so much. Sensing my own grand finish near, I pull out of him, pressing my member against his. He joins in this filthy tango of ours, flicking his groin upwards. "So… so damn close" I mutter, pressing my forehead against his. At last, I can't stand anymore. We erupt in physical rapture together, our cries mingling into one opulent sound that rang off into the night. Our bodies convulse together, rubbing together to unlock the other's bliss. "I love you so much" I whisper, kissing his forehead gently. He doesn't need to answer – the message he carves onto the sides of my body with his fingers is more than enough to let me know.
I roll off his body with a deep breath, hearing him gasp for air beside me. Eventually our breathing calms down to a semblance of their former selves, letting our bodies relax from their hedonistic trances. "That was the last time we make love together" I murmur, staring up at the stars. I can feel his gaze turn on me, this time with a gloomy disposition. "Give me a reason to let you go."
"I'll give a thousand for each one you can think of for me to stay." I turn my head to the side and look at him. We're both defeated by this, but somewhere inside of us, we know it's the right thing to do. He takes my hand and locks his fingers with his. How I'll miss his touch when I'm gone. "Why'd you lie to me?" My chest collapses in one fluid exhalation. "Because I would rather you be angry at me than have your heart broken like mine. Obviously, I didn't do a very good job."
"No, you didn't" he laughs softly, throwing me a small grin. His face rearranges itself into a vacant look once more though, claiming the smile I love so much. "Will I ever see you again?"
"Depends. Will you ever stop loving me?"
"Never."
"Then I can't come back here" I say quietly. "You're more than her weapon; you're the reason why she gets up in the morning. She loves you and I can't come between that."
"Even if I love you?"
"Especially if you love me." His grip on my hand tightens, but I bear with it. If I had my way, the two of us would stay in this emotional limbo forever, but I can't be selfish anymore. "Promise me you'll take care of her Soul."
"No."
"Promise me" I growl. He looks at me strangely for a minute, but his head gives me the slightest of nods. "I'll never love her as much."
"I didn't ask you to go that far" I smile, bringing our interlocked hands to my lips of the sweetest kiss I would ever give in my life. There's still so much unfinished about us, so much left unsaid but I know that he'll always feel my love, no matter where we are. Even in this new beginning, he's a part of the past I carry with me. I can never forget him, not that I'll try to. To the world, he's the partner of my daughter, but to me he will always be the love that could never be.
-xoxoxoxoxo-
"Did he say where he was going?"
"No" said the blonde, with a barely concealed hint of sadness in her voice. "Just that he was sorry for not being the father he should have been, and that he needed to go find himself." She looked off into the black distance, feeling a void of loneliness open up inside of her. "He might have been the most irritating person on the planet-"
"But you can't help but miss him." The scythe wrapped his arms around his meister's waist, pressing his head against the nape of her neck. No one said it would be easy, but he had to try – he had made a promise. "How'd you know?" asked Maka bewilderedly, resting her hands on the ones that held her so passionately. Soul laughed softly. "Because I know you."
"In the spirit of all that, why'd you bring me up to this rooftop?"
"Look at the stars Maka." The blonde lifted her head, gazing in awe at the heavenly orbs shimmering far above her. Her eyes rounded at the splendor of the celestial diamonds set beautifully against the sky's darkened satin. "They're amazing" she whispered. Soul closed his eyes, fighting off a smile that plagued his lips. Like father, like daughter. "I brought you up here because this place reminds me of loss and hope. Someone smart once told me that you never truly lose something, you just move on to the next big thing."
"Sounds like a pretty smart person."
"He was the world's biggest idiot" smiled the weapon; glad that Maka couldn't see the melancholic grin he wore. "But yeah, he could be pretty smart at times." The meister let out a melodious laugh before returning to her heaven-directed watch. "The way they twinkle, they're like little gems out there, aren't they?"
"No Maka" whispered Soul softly. He felt a sharp pain pierce his heart at her words. He didn't know how long it would take for this hurt to truly go away, but he hoped it never did. The pain served as a constant scar for him, always reminding him that somewhere out there in the world, his true love had sacrificed the both of them for the greater good. "Stars never shimmer. They bleed."
SO, did you guys like it? Leave a review and let me know please, all feedback appreciated! Thank you for reading this!