A/N: By request, Clint's reaction. This story will not make any sense without reading my other fics with the same pairing, starting with "Identical Opposites", but please be advised, they are explicit and contain graphic sex. This one does not.

"You guys are up early. Suppose you ate all the waffles too, like usual? Oh. Wait. Nevermind," he continued, picking up the empty syrup container with sarcasm that would give Tony himself a run for his money. "Stark, what the hell? You drink syrup instead of coffee? Save some for the rest of us. Eh, whatever. It's not like it's any good anyway." Needless to say, Clint Barton wasn't exactly cheerful in the mornings. OK, Clint Barton wasn't at all cheerful in the mornings.

In a way, it was sort of funny. At least Banner thought it was, for obvious reasons. Which made him the next to incur Clint's grouchiness. "What are you smirking about?"

"Nothing. Nothing. Just sitting here. Eating. You know. Breakfast." It would have been a lot easier to play it cool if Tony hadn't kicked him under the table.

Clint took an exasperated pull from his coffee mug, as if he couldn't get the caffeine in him fast enough, swallowed, and then winced. "Jesus Christ, where do they keep this, huh? God damned radioactive." He reached over Bruce's shoulder to grab the sugar carafe, leaning in front of him and almost on him dramatically in order to do so, and then gave him his most malevolent don't-turn-your-back-on-me-anytime-soon smile.

"Wait just a minute here. I did not just see..." Clint put his thumb under Bruce's chin and turned Bruce's head up and towards him. "The fuck? This is not fucking OK. What the hell?" Banner said nothing, just sat there, turning redder and redder, while Tony was sucking on his front teeth to keep himself from laughing. "In what universe is Banner getting laid and I'm not?"

Which of course caused everyone, including Thor, who had just walked into the dining area with her, to turn around and look at Natasha. She froze where she was, with a palms up, furrowed brow "What...?"

"Apparently you're not performing your duties up to Clint's exacting standards."

"Hey, you stay out of this, Tony," and if looks could kill, Clint would have been a murder.

"What duties?" Of course, for every minute Natasha had no idea what was going on, Clint just grew more and more frustrated.

Clint brushed past her on the way to grab a tray, purposely cutting it a little too close. "Guess Banner likes it rough."

"Would somebody please tell me what's going on?"

"Well, Natasha, we either have a vampire on board, or Bruce over there has something I don't. Well, that's not entirely correct. He obviously is having something I don't."

Then of course Thor had to get in the act. "It may not be wise to embarrass our friend in such a way."

"It's fine. Really. I'm fine. Don't worry about it. We're... I'm... it's good." Even Banner's ears were red.

"Oh, it looks like it's good, all right." Clint walked back over to the two men, sat down next to Banner and put an arm around his shoulders. "Seriously, man. What's your secret?"

"N... no secret. I... uh..." He shrugged and raised his eyebrows.

"Clint, leave him alone," Natasha admonished. "I think it's sweet. I mean, seriously. Look at him. He's adorable."

"You too now? For real? Oh that's just fucking perfect." Clint picked his tray back up and took his frustrations out on a few sausage links and some scrambled eggs. "I'm going to go eat in my room. And by the way, I hate all of you. Hate."

They at least had the courtesy to wait until Clint was out of the room to start laughing. Natasha came over to sit by Bruce whose waffles had suddenly become even more interesting than they had already been. She nudged her arm against his, leaned over and gave him the puppy dog eyes. "I have to see now. You know that, right?" Bruce smirked and turned his head and Natasha whistled under her breath.

"Always the quiet ones, isn't it? Always the quiet ones."

She stood up and clapped Tony on the shoulder, without looking at him. "Nice work, Stark."

Then there were two people blushing.