I'm beginning to think that Nightwing is going to have very mixed feelings about his two friends Kaldur and Roy. This may have OOCness and is probably Canon. *Shrug* Whatever. Hope you enjoy this.

"I had not believed Nightwing until this moment."

"You did not want to believe!"

"None of us wanted to believe this! How could you betray us?"

"You dare question me? After all of you let Tula die!"

"Kaldur, that was a mission! Aquagirl knew the risks, no one wanted…"

"Neptune's beard! Don't coddle this traitor!"

Nightwing shocked himself awake; the sound of his former friend's angered voice echoing painfully in his ears. As usual, his stomach twisted at the memory of his friend glaring at him like he'd been the one to kill Tula. He'd been there sure but…he couldn't have done anything to save her. He couldn't do anything. He hated that he couldn't do anything but…he couldn't.

He ran a hand through his hair, glaring at the wall of his dorm in the Mount. He'd been staying here more often than usual since the situation with the Kroloteans, Kaldur, and his father Black Manta. The six Leaguers who'd been – basically – court martialed were still dealing with that issue and so the League was six short. Nightwing couldn't even talk to his own mentor because of it which made him feel like he was…lacking something.

Even Roy's disappointed expression made his insides twist and knot up. He'd tried to make the point that the Light had most likely killed the original Roy Harper – as was Cadmus policy – once he was deemed no longer useful. The only reason they hadn't done that with Superman was because he was still useful apparently – Conner had been meant as a replacement after all.

An alarm went off then, and Nightwing shoved himself to his feet, throwing on his shirt as he went, placing his mask on his face as soon as he tugged it down over his scarred torso.

"What's happened?" he asked as he strode into the main hall area. He was mostly alone save for Conner, Red Tornado, and Wonder Girl.

"Kaldur," Conner growled angrily as he glared at the holographic screens that showed Kaldur moving through a crowd of Black Manta's men, giving orders.

"There are at least two hostages," Red Tornado stated. "The rest of the team is busy with its own duties which leaves only the four of us." He turned to look at them, the worry tangible from him even though he wasn't human. "I do not think it will be enough."

Nightwing didn't think it'd be enough either. Wonder Girl seemed to share the same feelings while Conner simply glared.

"I think we'll be fine," Conner growled. "We've got two people with super strength, one person with power over wind, and the best hacker I've ever met before. Kaldur won't know what hit him."

"Conner," Wonder Girl said warily. "Did you forget he's fought besides at least three of us before? I think he'll know and that we'll need more fire power than this to take him and those goons he's got under his wing."

Conner growled in frustration, Wolf nudging his elbow caringly. He patted the genetically modified canine's head and then sent Wonder Girl another glare.

"We'd be taking Sphere and Wolf with us either way; that's even better chances of winning right?" he countered.

She shook her head. "I'd prefer we had at least the Team up against him. I don't like his numbers against ours either way but at least with the full team, we'd have a real chance."

"Real chance," Conner groused. "While you wait for that real chance, he'll be getting away!" He stormed out then, in his usual way, Wolf scampering after him. Wonder Girl simply watched him go with a sad look on her face. Red Tornado didn't make a sound as he returned to his usual post at the monitors.

Nightwing followed him down to the garage where Sphere had already turned into the Supercycle, Conner and Wolf Climbing into their appointed seats. He leapt up and landed in the back seat, a determined look on his face.

"What're you doing?" Conner asked a bit shocked.

"Coming with you."

"Why?"

"Don't sound so suspicious. I'm coming with and you're just going to have to put up with it."

The cycle chirped as it wrapped a harness around Nightwing's body, strapping him in tightly as if she agreed with him. Conner gave him a disagreeing look but took his seat none the less.

The ride was oddly quick but it was long enough for Nightwing to wallow in his memories. Kaldur's enraged and saddened face when he learned of her death after he'd come back from a mission. Nightwing's side still ached at the memory of learning she hadn't made it out, that Kaldur had been away on a mission and would have to learn only after he came back. It ached because of an injury he'd sustained during that mission.

"We're almost there," Superboy yelled over his shoulder. Nightwing nodded, his hand gripping the safety harness like it was a good luck charm. His other hand strayed to his right side and gripped it in a worried grip.

"We should land as silently as possible," he called over the roar of the cycle. Superboy nodded and maneuvered the cycle into a clearing that wasn't too far from where they'd have to get to. Nightwing could see the warehouse just over the tree tops as he hopped out of the cycle. Wolf yipped as he and Superboy leapt out, the Sphere changing back to her usual shape.

"Let's go," Superboy urged. "Who knows what he'll leave behind this time."

Nightwing nodded sadly as he disappeared into the brush. Superboy was quieter than he used to be, his footfalls soft and barely audible as they moved through the trees. Wolf was nearly silent as well, Sphere carefully maneuvering through the broken branches in her bug form. Two minutes and they were there, Black Manta's men carefully circling the warehouse, weapons ready. Nightwing moved first, disappearing from shadow to shadow, knocking out every man in his way. Superboy did the same thing, only with a bit more force than Nightwing had used.

"Wasn't that a little much?" Nightwing asked as Conner finished tossing one into a tree. He'd be out cold for a while that was for certain.

"Not really," Superboy retorted. "I'm going to do much worse to Kaldur." He slammed a fist into the other palm and cracked his knuckles with a mean look on his hard face. Nightwing felt that ache in his side again.

"Remember, he's a friend…"

"He was a friend," Superboy spat. "He's chosen his side."

"We said the same thing about Cheshire," Nightwing warned. "We said she'd fall back to crime…she did…now, we have no idea what she's up to anymore."

"Probably the same as ever," Superboy growled as he moved for the building. "People don't really change after all."

And yet, here we are…attacking a former friend who hates us because the girl he loved is dead from a Team mission, Nightwing thought bitterly. He followed anyway; there was no point in letting Superboy get himself into an unwinnable fight without a bit of back up – Superman wouldn't be happy if his little brother was killed or hurt while he was gone. Besides, he didn't think he could stand to lose another teammate or friend.

It took what seemed like forever to get to the hostages. There were goons everywhere and all of them were well trained. They had their work cut out for them when they moved through them, Wolf ripping at them, Sphere and Conner bashing them away, and Nightwing gracefully maneuvering them away with kicks and jabs.

"It's alright," Nightwing soothed as he cut them free. "Superboy…" He was gone, Wolf off with him. Nightwing frowned in irritation as Sphere bumped him before turning into the Supercycle again. "Get in," he commanded, nearly tossing the hostages into the cycle as he did. They did as he commanded, Sphere racing off to get them to safety.

Superboy, he thought irritated as he stormed through the maze-like building. What was it about Conner that made it easy for him to find trouble? It couldn't be simply because he was a Super. No…that couldn't be the only reason.

There was a ringing crash followed by a harsh cry of pain on his left; he ran towards it as a battle roar reached his ears. Kaldur…Conner….A wolf-like growl echoed through the building only to be followed by a pained yelp and another crash.

"Kaldur'am!" Nightwing yelled as he burst into the room. He barely had time to duck when the Atlantean shot a red beam at him. He summersaulted to his feet, tossed a few bird-a-rangs, and charged to Superboy's side.

Superboy sat up from the impacted wall he was lying in and on, a hand rubbing his head as he scowled towards Kaldur who was swiping away the weapons Nightwing had tossed at him with ease. He barely spotted Nightwing racing to him when another blinding shot came from Kaldur's helmet.

"Nightwing!" he cried when his friend disappeared from view, the wall exploding out from behind where he'd been. He spotted him a few seconds later after hearing him yelp out as he was flung headlong towards another set of equipment. Conner heard bones crunch as they came into contact with unrelenting steel and iron and he winced.

Wolf barked as he leapt up from where he'd fallen, shooting himself to Nightwing's side to stand there like a guard. Superboy shot from his place to slam his fist into Kaldur's helmet, relishing as he felt the metal try to give form its clasps. He also relished the sound of a pained grunt coming from his traitorous friend.

Nightwing pushed himself up and tossed a rope with weighted balls towards Kaldur. As it wrapped around his torso and arms, Nightwing pushed himself to his feet, wincing as his jarred ribs protested. Wolf whined and gently nudged his arm before they heard another roar of rage come from Kaldur as he managed to rip the titanium rope to shreds. Nightwing wanted to curse but all he could do was stare as Kaldur flung Superboy away from him.

Wolf growled again and charged before Nightwing could grab his scruff. Nightwing managed a cry for Wolf to stop but the canine was already leaping for Kaldur's throat. Kaldur managed to swat him away, a steel pipe bending as his body made contact.

"Admirable," Kaldur growled as he stalked towards Nightwing. "Come to stop me or did you come to talk again?" He unsheathed a water sword and charged.

Two seconds; his escrima sticks were out and he fell into a defensive position Six seconds; he's blocking Kaldur's first attack, the solidified water ringing off the metal. Ten seconds; he's trying to block, trying to counter, trying to do something…Kaldur keeps coming at him. Twelve seconds; Kaldur catches his side with the sword, slicing away his uniform as he swerves away from the hit. A scar is revealed, Kaldur's eyes give it a questioning look; Nightwing takes the opportunity to drop kick him away.

"Nice hit," Superboy grumbles as he lifts Wolf to his feet.

"Not over yet," he says softly as Kaldur lifts himself back to his feet.

"For once, I can agree with you," Kaldur snarled as he brandished the other sword. Superboy gritted his teeth as Kaldur charged again and shot to stand in front of Nightwing. It didn't stop Kaldur though; he just focused his attack on the larger boy as Nightwing flipped out of the way and began searching for a way to stop this from escalating further.

Hard to do when you can't find a switch…wait…there it is, he thought before tossing a weapon to switch the warehouse systems on. Gears whirred as the packing plant roared to life. Superboy managed to miss getting hit moving equipment whilst leading Kaldur into some of it. Kaldur was naturally blocked or foiled as Superboy maneuvered deeper into the fray of moving parts. Nightwing could hear Sphere chirping near where Wolf was leaning heavily against a wall.

"Superboy! It's time to go!" he yelled watching as Kaldur's sword embedded itself into a mechanical arm and he was tossed free and clear of Superboy.

"What? You can't be serious!"

"I am! Move!"

Superboy muttered a curse but did as he was ordered – thankfully – and moved towards Sphere and Wolf. Sphere changed into cycle form, Superboy helping Wolf into his seat before leaping to the controls.

"Nightwing?" Superboy called over the noise, glancing to the empty back seat. "Nightwing!"

"Get out of here Superboy!" Nightwing yelled as he dodged an attack from Kaldur. He heard the cycle rev, saw the flash in Conner's eyes. "Wolf needs attention; get out of here! I'll be fine!"

"You'll be anything but fine when I'm done with you!" Kaldur roared, his sword finally catching skin as it slid down Nightwing's chest.

"Nightwing!" Superboy cried out as Nightwing yelped.

Nightwing leapt back, flipping in the air until he came to a landing. He pulled something from his belt, pressed a button, and tossed it towards Kaldur.

"Get out of here!" he commanded to Superboy. Sphere listened and raced off with the young Kryptonian and Wolf as Kaldur realized what Nightwing had thrown at him and raced for cover.

Nightwing dove out of a window, gulping in air as he prepared to hit the water. The plastique he'd thrown went off, toppling his dive into a free fall, his body slamming into the water hard.

"Wow…look who joined the world of the living again," a snide voice chuckled over him. It dropped to a stage whisper to say, "Roy! He's awake!"

Roy?

A baby was crying.

Baby?

"So's Lian," Roy's unmistakable voice groaned, the baby's cries getting louder as his grew in volume as well. They were getting closer. That much he could tell.

"Oh," the first voice, female, crooned. "I'll take her. You find out what your friend was doing in the bay." He heard her fall into a lullaby, her voice deep and oddly soothing, as hands fell on his bare shoulders – where's my shirt? – and pulled him into a sitting position. One of those hands slid over what sounded like fresh bandaging.

"How do you feel?" Roy asked as Nightwing's vision began to finally clear.

"Like…I hit the water at terminal velocity," Nightwing groused. He glanced over to the woman only to feel his body stiffen. Roy laid a comforting hand on his shoulder. "What's Cheshire doing in your…" he started to look around and he grimaced. "Tell me you don't actually live here; this place looks like it was condemned."

"It's actually looking a lot better as of late," Cheshire groused as she rocked the little bundle in her arms. "As much as Lian needs her father, she also needs a safe, clean place to stay – so I've had him fix up the place."

"Father?" Nightwing breathed as he stared at his blushing friend. He'd shaved, his hair was combed, and he looked like his lack of sleep was from a more meaningful purpose now.

"Yeah…" Roy confirmed. "Jade…Can you give us a bit?"

"Fine," she sniffed with a dismissive shrug before waltzing off into another room, singing to their little girl. Nightwing wanted to ask if he'd gotten the child tested to be sure but…Roy was already angry enough with him as it was.

"What were you doing in California?" Roy asked.

"Kaldur…hostages…" Nightwing managed as he tried to sit straighter, his ribs protesting. He lifted a hand to his face and almost sighed with tangible relief that his mask was in place. "Did…Jade…look?"

"No…I made her swear not to. For once, she listened to me."

Nightwing hoped he was right about that. He would have some serious repercussions when he was found let alone when Batman came back.

"Surprised that I didn't see one of the other bat-family members with you though…Could have sworn I'd seen Superboy screaming at that cycle of his to go back before the place blew too…"

"We were shorthanded…Wonder Girl and Red Tornado didn't really want to get involved."

"Don't blame them…I don't even want to get involved with him since he turned that particular bend," Roy muttered as he shifted to check Nightwing's bandages. "Those swords are pretty good…didn't think they could do this sort of damage until you fell into the bay."

His eyes fell to Nightwing's side, brow furrowing in confusion and worry. Nightwing placed a hand over the star shaped scar.

"Where's that from?" Roy asked earnestly. It was the most earnest tone Nightwing had ever heard from him in the past five years and it hurt to hear it.

"I should be asking if it's just the little girl that woke you up…"

"Not really…Jade and I have once more lead…I have to try to exorcise this ghost apparently." He gave a wry smile. Nightwing couldn't find himself able to reciprocate.

He's still looking despite everything…Kaldur tried to kill me…My side hurts…

"How long have I been out?" he asked.

"A couple days…"

"Did you at least radio the Team to keep them from wasting man power searching for me?"

"…No?"

"Great…Just great…This is definitely a disaster."

"Hey…I haven't heard anything of Superman on the news lately…or Batman…there's four others who've stopped showing up too."

"We figured out what happened during those sixteen hours…they've been court martialed for it too…we're fixing it."

"Right…like you fixed the thing with Roy Harper."

Silence.

"Hey! You shouldn't be standing up!"

"Where's my shirt?"

"Nightwing please! Sit down!"

"Where's my shirt Roy?"

"You'll open your wounds!"

"What is he doing?" Jade screeched as she came into the room.

"Sit down Nightwing!"

"WHERE'S MY SHIRT?"

"Why?" Jade and Roy chorused.

"I want it; so I can leave."

"You can't leave yet!" Jade growled. "You're still injured!"

"You're reopening your wounds as we speak!" Roy yelled.

"Speak…right…Where is it?"

Roy came up with another weak argument as Jade's face fell into an expression of sudden understanding, and sad acceptance. She disappeared for a moment only to return with Nightwing's shirt that had blood staining the blue bird on its chest.

"Jade!"

"Hush, or you'll wake Lian," she hissed as she held up the shirt. Nightwing took it from her hand as gently as he could manage and yanked it over his shoulders and head. He ignored the pain his shoulder sent him, the screams his ribs gave, and the sting the star shaped scar on his right side poked at him for thinking of painful thoughts.

"I'm leaving," he announced easily as if he were the older one. In some technicality, he was older than Roy…what with the whole having been a clone thing – it made him tons older than Superboy who was about to turn six or seven in technical terms.

"Nightwing," Roy tried to plead.

"No…I'm done…You go ahead and look for someone who'd more than likely dead. You and Kaldur just go ahead and live your lives…Do me the favor of trying to steer clear of mine!"

He was at the window when he heard Jade whisper "Let him go" to Roy. His heart stung as he launched a line out to another building and swung away. He forced himself to not look back.

Everyone had been worried about him.

Canary damn near ripped his head off with her chastising. Red Tornado gave him a blank toned line or two that could basically be summed up as "You should have thought that through more carefully." Batgirl and Robin were the ones who did the most shielding of comments and looks but they'd had their own punches they hadn't bothered to pull. He'd gotten back to the Bat-Cave to be given a whack to the head and new stitches and a good glare from Alfred.

In the end though, they'd all ended up saying they were happy he was alright; that he was alive.

"How's the sword wound?" Conner asked gently as he leaned against Nightwing's dorm room door. He'd been the last to ever voice anything about that night – Wolf bumping his elbows sooner and Sphere chirping as it scanned him over first – but it felt good to know that he was going to say something.

"Fine," he said with a grin.

"Is it?"

"Yes…why do you ask; other than you're supposed to ask as a teammate who was there but wasn't able to do anything due to circumstances."

"What? I'm not allowed to worry over you since I'm partially to blame for you getting injured?"

"Kaldur was the one who injured me…not you…"

"I talked you into going didn't I?"

"No…I talked myself into going. I wanted to talk to Kaldur again but…Well it was obviously not going to happen."

They were silent for a moment before Conner finally spoke again.

"You look like you're giving up on him."

"…I think I am."

Conner looked shocked. "Really?"

Nightwing found himself nodding, his hand falling to his right side again – a new habit; he touched painful wounds as if he still had to close them.

"Wow…I didn't think it was possible."

"I'm giving up on Roy too."

That earned him a blink. "What?"

"They've chosen their lives…I'm done meddling. I'm done having pain from friends I want to help but won't be able to no matter how hard I try…It's not like I can do very much anyway…not as a human."

"Suddenly I want to hit you through the wall," Conner growled, suddenly looming over Nightwing's seated form. Nightwing looked at him blankly past his sunglasses.

"Why?"

"Because you're acting like…like you've quit! Like you can't do this anymore so the only way out is to stop caring about anything."

Nightwing frowned. "I'm just saying I'm going to let those two live their lives. That's all."

"Then you rounded it off with the whole, 'I'm just human; what am I worth?' crap."

"Says the kid who can punch through walls."

"Compared to the one who can do multiple flips in midair, hack into the most secure computers known to man, and has more languages in his head than I do? Yeah, I do say."

"Whatever," Nightwing scoffed as he turned away to focus on his school stuff. Eighteen, valedictorian hopeful, caring a 4.0 in an AP loaded schedule, and fighting crime for a living wasn't exactly the easiest thing to do. He managed it though.

"Nightwing…You can't be serious…I thought you wanted to talk Kaldur back into the team the way you all tried to talk Roy into it five years ago…not to mention now."

"Roy only wants to find the original Roy Harper and Kaldur just wants us all to go to hell. Why should I bother Conner?"

"Because they're your friends?"

"Kaldur's made it abundantly clear how much he hates us…You feel the same about him…"

"I want to knock sense into him more than I want to trash him. I just don't have as much patience as you do…let alone the confidence that he'd listen to me."

"So, again, why the hell should I bother?"

"Because that's what you do…you and Batman are the ones who give a damn about people even when you don't think you should. I would never have been given a real chance had it not been for Batman and you…You're the one who's going to have to make the final decision either way…You're the leader of the Team now."

"Don't remind me."

"No…I'm going to remind you for as long as it takes to get you out of this thought process. When you snap back to the way you usually are, then I'll quit. Start this back up again, I'll start all over again. Don't forget that."

The door hissed closed again and Nightwing found himself alone with his thoughts.

Alone with his memories.

"Aquagirl…no…leave it…"

"What happened?"

"There was a blast; he fell on a rebar. You must get him to a doctor; now!"

"What about-?"

"I'll take care of it! Just go!"

"Aquagirl…"

"Trust me Nightwing; I'll be fine."

Blinding lights, a pain filled side, and painkillers.

"Where is Tula?" He sounded so hopeful.

"She…she didn't make it out…"

"What?"

"She's gone…I'm so sorry Kaldur."

"Don't touch me!"

"I'm sorry Kaldur…There was…nothing…we could-."

"You let her die!"

He swiped his arm over his desk, pencils, pens, paper, and books going everywhere. He gritted his teeth to hold back the cry of anguish the memory dragged with it. He didn't want Conner to hear him…Not if all he was going to do was remind him he'd have to buck up sooner or later for the Team. Not if all he had to say was he was better than this and shouldn't be wallowing in memories.

Not when the scar from the rebar hurt so badly.

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