Hiiiiii~! I'm back with an update once again~! I'm, again, sorry it took so long but especially for you guys I made it a bit longer ^^ Life's been difficult lately so I hope you'll all excuse me... if you don't that's fine too...

Sooooo... I hope you haven't forgotten about me and I'm sorry for not updating in over a year... I only now noticed it has been that long...damn, time sure flies doesn't it?...
Also, I'm changing the title, formally called fanfiction Secret Singer will now be known as Composed~

Well, I won't hold you up any longer so lets go on with the story~!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, just the idea
Warning: Un-beta'd and bad language...

I think that's it... ON WITH THE STORY~!

Composed: A name

Allen's POV;

I had almost forgotten how tiring being in Neah's presence can be. For example, immediately when I came as much as close to the house, well let's just say I'm lucky I survived. We drove towards the house, the late evening sun shining on the garden. Alma parked the car in the driveway and as soon as I got out of the car I fell down on my ass, again. This is really getting old, is the first thought that flashed through my head.

"Neah, would you be so kind and Get. The. Fuck. Off. Of. Me!" I started with a grunt and ended up yelling. I didn't want to yell at my uncle but this really pisses me off! Why do people insist on tackle-hugging me and making me fall on my ass? What's so fun about torturing my behind anyway?

"But Allen~! I haven't seen you in I don't even know how long and I've missed you~!" My uncle whined. I swear, he's like an overgrown five year old. Sighing I pushed him off of me while Neah was still hugging my waist.

"Whatever, can we just go inside, it's getting cold." It's October and it's getting colder each day and to be honest I've been looking forwards to winter. I love winter, there's snow and you can sit at the fireplace with your family with some hot chocolate milk watching a movie or something.

"Tyki is already here I see." Alma stated as he saw the black pick-up truck Tyki loved so much. Groaning I got up and pushed Neah away from me completely. I glared at Lavi since he was still laughing at my ass' misfortune. My poor behind can't take much more abuse, what if it's gonna fall off? That would be horrible!

My thoughts were interrupted as Lavi dropped his arm on my shoulder and leaned on it. Great, now I'm not just some 'hug-pole' now I'm also a 'leaning-pole', my life just keeps getting better and better.

Lavi's POV;

I could barely hold back my laughter as, once again, Allen fell on his ass by a hug-attack. It kind of irritated me that it was not one of mine but I guess it's okay since it's his uncle. I smiled though.

Anyway, I don't get why Tyki would be here. I mean, I know Allen and Tyki knew each other and live together, but they didn't give me the impression that they were very close. Maybe I read it wrong when Allen beat him up Friday? Oh well, it doesn't really matter.

Allen looks so cute when he's irritated! I just can't help but half hug him, he seems irritated by that but not as much as normal, when I tackle-hug him, which is all the time. I wrapped my arm around his shoulder. Maybe I'm making progress?

Maybe I'll get him so far to ask me out instead of me asking him out. That way Alma has nothing to complain about. And I can be with a cute little Allen~!I would squeal if it wouldn't look so weird at the moment. It would also like to pinch Allen's cheeks right about now, he's just far too cute to not do that or hug him so hard he can't breathe.

Neah is doing a good job on doing that right now though. I hope he doesn't kill my little cute Allen.

I've met Neah a few times before, not that often though, and at those times he seemed like a calm and collected guy, not at all like he's displaying himself right now. It kind of shocks me.

What did I do wrong now? All of a sudden Neah is glaring at me while he stole Allen out of my arms, well, arm I guess, and hugging him again.

"Neah! Let GO of me! This instant!" I can see Allen trying to hold back, trying not to hit him. I kind of hope he would though. Am I a bad person for wishing that? If so I don't care.

You might wonder why I'm so possessive over Allen all of a sudden. Well, I've been thinking really hard since I left Allen's house after finishing that song, and I came to the conclusion that I like Allen, like really like him. It doesn't seem like Allen likes me much though, that thought just makes me sad. Besides, even if he did like me back, if there was the smallest possibility, there's still Alma.

"Why are you looking so depressed all of a sudden?"

"Hu?" I turn my head to the speaker, only to look into silver-ish grey eyes. Allen is watching me with this calculative gaze, it makes my kind of uncomfortable to say the least. "Oh! Um, nothing really." I try to brush it off with a nervous laugh, it doesn't seem like he's buying it though.

He watches me for a bit longer before shrugging and turning around. "Whatever, you were just spacing out and it got me worried, the rest went already inside."

"Aww, little Allen was worried about me~!" I like the way he blushes, he looks even cuter that way. I don't like his hits though. "Ow!"

"Shut up." He mutters as he walk to the door. I smile, while rubbing my head. Damn he can pack a punch. It makes me kind of happy he worries about me though. He's so sweet!

Allen's POV;

Darn, Lavi's annoying. Spacing out like that and then making me feel so weird. Whatever, everyone went inside already and I really don't wanna stand in the cold any longer, so Lavi better come in too. I guess he's already following me, it seems that's all he does, at school too. It's kinda cute, like a little puppy. Hmm, maybe I could learn him to do tricks too? Like playing dead, or sit. I can already imagine him playing dead, oh how quite it will be.

"Allen~! I thought you'd never come in, I thought you left me all alone again!" Neah is so annoying.

"Damn you uncle! Shut up and act normal for once!" I kicked him in the shin, I think it hurts, if his jumping around and, although fake, crying is anything to go by. Oh well, whatever.

"You really shouldn't be so cruel to your uncle, Allen."

"Oh shut up Tyki, nobody asked for your input." Tyki just shrugged and went back to watching telly and drinking his beer. I just roll my eyes at him, the lazy fuck.

Hmm, I've been using much more swearwords lately. I should probably stop. Then again, I don't really care soooooo... I probably won't. Whatever.

"che"

"You too Bakanda, I don't care about what you have to say." Darn it, if Alma didn't have to take so long choosing my clothes I would have had at least a few more minutes here without him.

"Damn you...!" He was already getting up, probably to strangle me, or kill me in another horrible painful way. Luckily for me, Alma came to the rescue. How you ask? By promptly sitting on his lap. Sometimes I forget my brother isn't as stupid as he looks and acts. Kanda doesn't dare to try anything now though, so he just settles with a glare for now. I just sent it right back at him, I'm not scared!

"Allen~ you shouldn't glare so much!" And again I have a red head hanging on me, when will this end? "You'll get wrinkles if you do!" what the hell is he doing?!

You're probably wondering. Well, all of a sudden Lavi's face was really close to my face and I couldn't stop this stupid blush and he started to 'massage' my eyebrows, trying to stop my glaring. Idiot. What do I do you ask? I hit him of course.

"Hey! That hurt!" he's sitting in a corner, rubbing his head and pouting. He looks kinda cute. What am I thinking? He is not cute! Nope, I do not find one of my brothers friend, one whom I just met a week or so ago, cute. Nope not at all.

Oh, who am I kidding? It actually scares me, how close I'm getting to particularly Lavi in such a short time. Normally I keep my distance for the first month or so but with Lavi... I dunno really. Life's confusing like that I guess.

Lavi's POV;

Dinner was good! Turns out Neah can't cook worth shit and Alma was too busy making out with his boyfriend. So in the end Allen had to cook. I knew he had a massive appetite but now I had to pleasure of finding out he could cook too! I wouldn't be surprised if he got five stars if he ever decided to open a restaurant.

It was already dark outside, since the days were getting shorter, and Allen had left the living room , saying that he needed some fresh air. I think I'll follow him, maybe I can get some answers now? Who knows.

Hmm, where's Neah at? I haven't seen him leave the room. Kanda hit my head when I was looking around me, trying to find the uncle of my current interest, or crush if you want to call it that. "He's with the beansprout." He grumbled.

"Oh.." Kanda can be grumpy at times, okay, all the time, but he's actually a good guy if you get to know him. I don't know how he and Alma got together though, I guess opposites attract.

"..." Hm? What's that? Voices? Maybe I should check it out? What if it's an in breaker? I could save the day!

"Allen... are you sure you're okay?" Oh, it's just Neah talking to Allen. It sounds like it's serious, should I interrupt them? Probably not. I could eavesdrop, but then again, what if they find me? But then again, what's life without a bit of a risk!

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine Neah. Really, don't worry about me."

I wish I could see them, Allen sounds a bit... sad? Hmm, more lonely I think.

"How was 'traveling'?" I could hear the sarcasm in Neah's voice. So Allen really wasn't traveling after all! Ha, I was right all along!

"How did you-?"

"Oh, common Allen, you can't hide anything from me! I'm your uncle after a-"

"Alma told you right?" It didn't sound like a question, more like a statement. Hmm, Alma knows about it then? Well, I kinda figured, they are brothers after all.

"Yeah, shouldn't you tell the rest about your, erm, occupation? Tell them about who you're hiding?" Why's Neah being so serious all of a sudden. This whole evening he's been hanging on Allen, crying about how he missed him and all. But now...

"Yeah, I'm planning too, I need their help with something anyway... now please drop it." Allen sounded stressed, I don't like it, not one bit.

"Okay fine fine!" silence for a bit. "So.. what about you and that Lavi hu?"

"W-w-what!?" My eyes grew wide. What the hell is he talking about? I could imagine that cute blush appearing on Allen's cheeks right now, but I couldn't help but be embarrassed too.

"T-there's n-nothing going on between me and Lavi!" I could hear Neah laugh at that statement.

"Hey, but you like him though."

"..." Allen mumbled something which I couldn't understand. Did he like me? If so this would be a whole lot easier, but what if he didn't like me that way? I'd be devastated!

I could her Neah laugh again, then footsteps. Oh no! I have to hide! They'll probably find me if I stay here. I could try acting like I just got here, searching for the toilet or something? Yeah that sound like a good id-.

"Lavi! What are you doing here?" Neah sounded surprised.

"I, uh, I was searching for the toilet! Yes, the toilet!" Allen, who was standing behind Neah with a cute blush on his adorable face, looked at me as if to say 'I don't believe a word you're saying.' He shouldn't.

"Oh, is that all? Well, it's right over there." He pointed to a door right behind him. I nodded and tanked him before rushing to the toilet.

That was close!

"And Allen..." I could hear Neah whisper. "Consider talking to Mana." The last thing I heard before closing the door of the toilet was a sharp intake of breath, Allen did not smile for the rest of the evening, not even when I stole some underwear from Alma's room and wore it on my head for the rest of the evening. Alma was running after me and yelling about how he was gonna kill me if I didn't give him his underwear. I guess him and Kanda have something in common. Apparently they moth like coming up with the most gory ways to kill me.

Allen's POV;

It's been two weeks, two weeks of stress, fun and confusion. Lavi has been more clingy lately which seems to irritate Alma more and more which in turn makes Kanda more irritable. I've experienced more almost-dead situations over the last three days then I've had the rest of my life touring and such, you never know when you get an accident when you have a crazy ass driver when on tour...

I've also been going to school as White Clown more often to discuss any way to get more money to fund the concert and up until now we don't have much. Komui keeps over reacting whenever Lenalee comes in which interrupts the meeting and we don't get anything done. I also think Lenalee might suspect something, she's acting a bit too casual whenever I'm there as White Clown.

I've also gone out as my other persona more often with Lavi and he seems to relax a bit more each time we go hang out at my secret place, though he's still nervous and stuff. I've also noticed that he's more confident about his music after we hang out like that. I also hang around with him a lot whenever I'm myself and somehow Lavi seems to enjoy that more so then when he is with his idol. I really want to ask him why that is but that would mean blowing my cover.

That's another thing, I have to tell them soon! The concert is approaching fast and, even though we finished all our songs, we still have a lot to do! I also need their help with the organizing part. Tyki keeps telling me I shouldn't do it yet but I think that's mainly because he's still opposed to the idea of me reviling my identity.

"Allen?" There's just too much to think about! I don't know if I can actually do it! Why did I even agree on this in the first place?!

"Aaaaaallleeeeeeeen~!" I'm so stupid! What was I thinking? I can't do this, I really can't! My friends will hate me, I'll be kicked out of the band, I'm sure of it! And all my fans will hate me too! My career will be over!

"Allen!"

"Stop pocking me Lavi!" fuck, I got angry at Lavi for no reason! I really need to relax. I sigh. "Sorry..." I mutter as I see the hurt look on his face. "I didn't mean it like that. A lot has just been happening lately and I'm a bit stressed, is all."

I feel Lavi pat my hair before wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "It's okay buddy, we all get that sometimes. But what I wanted to ask you is if you wanted to get together with the band to show them the songs we've been working on..." Somehow he didn't sound like his usual self. There was more concern in his voice and in his eyes and, even though he tried to hide it, it was still noticeable.

I looked up to look at the rest. Kanda could care less, or so it seemed but I knew he did care. Alma was looking at a random ant, trying to drag a whole leave with him but not really succeeding. Lenalee and Lavi looked hopeful, really wanting to start working on those songs and finishing them, at least, that's what Lavi's look told me plus, of course, the concern for me because I've been too distracted lately. Lenalee was just curious about what we were working on.

I sighed again before nodding. "Yeah, that's a good idea." I really just wanted to go to bed when I got home but this is important. I knew that even Kanda was excited about what we came up with. Alma told me that Kanda was pretty excited about the songs Lavi and I came up with so far and was curious about what we made now.

"Che, is it really? The beans proud seems so distracted lately I wonder if he even cares at all..." Kanda scoffed. Lavi was pouting at him.

"Awww, that's mean Yu-chan. You should say stuff like that to the little bean, he works really hart for all of us." It's kinda sweet that he tries to defend me but...

"Why does everybody insist on calling me 'beansprout' instead of my given name?" Yes, I'm irritated, especially because now there is a red head hugging my waist as if his life depended on it.

"That's because you are a beansprout, beansprout~" He sang. "And a cute one at that~" does he really have to rub his head against my arm like that? It's uncomfortable, especially since I've been getting... feelings... for him. I don't know what kind of feelings, but it was definitely different than the sort of feeling you feel for a friend or even a best friend.

Blushing I try to push him off. "I-I'm not! Now get off of me!" I probably resembled a tomato by now, at least, that's what it feels like.

"Awww, but I like hugging you~!" as if the hugging wasn't bad enough as it was he tightened his grip on me, somehow I didn't really mind but I didn't want anyone to notice.

"Let go! I don't like you hugging me!" With one hard push I got him to let go. Bad move... He pouted and it looked like he was about to cry, his eyes wet and everything.

"B-but... Beansprout~!" And he's attached to my waist again, crying. I just sighed and patted his soft red hair. I liked his hair. It kind of resembled his personality. It was rebelliously sticking out every which way but still in control. I didn't like it when he wore his bandana, which he wasn't wearing at the moment luckily. It made him look that much more childish but then again, I guess that suits him too.

"Whatever, I give up..." I sighed. After a while Lavi was just nuzzling his head in my lap, making himself comfortable, while I was just lazily petting his hair. Alma was glaring at Lavi as he stole some fries form Kanda.

"Aww, you two are so cute together!" Lenalee squealed all of a sudden. I swear, the blush on my cheeks could not have been worse. I'm guessing Lavi is in a similar sort of shock as me since he shot up straight all of a sudden, not wanting to look at me.

"D-don't be ridiculous L-Lenalee!" I Exclaim. Not that I haven't thought about it, me and Lavi being together like that I mean, but I... I dunno really. I guess someone saying it like that all of a sudden just caught me off guard I guess.

"Y-yeah! T-that would j-just be weird!" Lavi said, a little bit too loud to be considered normal. It kinda hurt me to hear he thought like that. After a quick glance his way looked to the other side to a random splotch of grass.

"Y-yeah... weird, that'd just be... weird..." I whisper as I drop down on the grass.

I could see Lavi looking at me strangely, as if he was considering to either hug me or leave me alone. I was hoping he would do the later but I quickly banished those thought to the back of my head. Like he said, it would just be weird to be together like that with him. But I could help but hope that he did think of me like that in some way.

"Aww, but you two would be so cute~" Lenalee went on. This time it was Alma who interrupted her.

"Don't be ridiculous Lena. If Lavi even so much as thinks of my little baby brother like that I will castrate him the painful way." Who knew Alma had a side that was almost as bad as my 'black Allen'-side, key word being almost here.

I couldn't help but shudder slightly and I saw Lavi do the same out of the corner of my eye, he hid it well though.

"D-don't worry! I-I would n-never!" Lavi stuttered slightly as he backed off a bit, getting closer to me. I don't know what he's trying to accomplish with that, he's just pissing off Alma more by doing that, or maybe he plans on using me as a shield for if Alma attacks.

I sigh as I close my eyes, trying to ignore everyone around me. Lenalee said she went to go get something from the hot dog stand at the entrance of the park while Alma dragged Lavi with him to some trees a bit further away to have a 'talk'.

"Spit it out." I shot up all of a sudden, my vision got slightly black from sitting up too fast. I hadn't noticed Kanda was still here, I thought he went with Lenalee.

"w-what?!"

"I know who you are." He spat out. It sounded as if he still couldn't believe whatever he was talking about and I hoped he wasn't talking about what I thought he was talking about.

"W-what do you mean...?" I started nervously, the only thing I got as a response at first was a glare.

"Don't play dumb with me beansprout. I know you're famous, Alma told me. It took quit a lot to get him to tell me what you were hiding. Now spill it!"

"If you already know then why do you want me to tell you?" I glared at him. I'm trying to cover my shock here, okay! Don't judge me! Besides, he could also be talking about something entirely different.

"Che, stop lying to yourself, especially to him." He nodded towards Lavi, who was at the moment trying to convince Alma to let go of his ear. "He doesn't like secrets, especially not if the people close to him keep them from him. And the fact that this is one big secret is not making it any better." I blush at the part where he says that I'm someone close to him. I've only known him for a few weeks, I didn't think I was that close to him, but then again, I have been hanging out with him more often than not lately.

"I-I'm not hiding anything !" Yeah, I'm still trying to deny it, stop judging me okay!

"You're an idiot..." I don't think I've ever heard him talk this much. Damn you Alma! I thought you swore to never tell a soul about who I really was!

Sighing I gave in. "Fine, I'm White Clown, happy now?" I glare at him. I thought I saw some surprise in his eyes.

"Che, didn't think you'd give in this fast..." he muttered. He sighed before he went on. "Tell him... and while you're at it tell him how you feel too, I don't think he'll tell you how he feels in fear of Alma killing him." With that he got up and walked towards Alma to get him to leave Lavi alone, leaving me alone in shock. I am so gonna kill Alma next time we're alone, don't want anybody seeing me trying to hide a body now would I...

I sigh as I see Lavi approaching me, now free of Alma's assault. Happy now he sat down next to me, letting a relieved sigh escape his lips. I watched him for a bit longer, curious. I wonder how he would react. Would he be angry? Disappointed maybe? Shocked, of course! This is not going to be easy.

The concert will be in three weeks and I still have to tell them. I know I can't do this without them, I really need their help, especially Lavi's. Not because he's so great at this stuff, I really don't know if he is, but just because I seem to be more at ease with my decisions when he's around. I sigh which in turn makes Lavi give me one of the strange concerned looks again.

"Is something the matter Allen?" He seems really concerned. I sigh again, I seem to do that a lot lately. I don't know if I can tell him, especially not the way I feel, hack I don't even know how I feel!

I decided to just tell him. "Lavi..." I began.

"Hmm?" He was trying to encourage me, I knew he was. I knew he felt that I was about to tell him something important.

"I..." Fuck I can't do this! I really can't!

Lavi sighed. What reason does he have to sigh? "Allen, If you don't want to tell me it's fine, really. I don't mind you having a secret. I mean, everyone has secrets, even I. You just tell me whenever you're ready. I've been dying to know what you've been hiding, don't get me wrong, but I really don't want things to change between us..."

"Well, fuck, now I have to tell you, if I don't I'll only feel like crap..." I let out another sigh. "Why do you do this to me Lavi?" He send me a confused look as I sighed again. I should sigh less I decided.

"You really-" I held up my hand to silence him.

"Don't..." I tell him. I took one deep breath before I started. I decided to tell him and I'm not gonna back out of this one. Plus it's too big a secret to keep from my closes friend. I've never had much friends but I knew secrets were not good if you wanted to keep friends as close as they were to you.

"You're probably not gonna like what I'm about to tell you. I'm just asking you to not hate me for not telling you sooner. It's kind of hard to tell anyone really. I've lived too long keeping this a secret so it's really hard to just blur it out like this..." I know I'm rambling, I'm just trying to buy myself some time, not that it really matters.

"Please Lavi, I just ask you to forgive me for keeping this secret and not hate me after I tell you. You can have as much time as you want afterwards to think or whatever you want to do, you can even hit me if you want, but please, please, don't hate me." I plead. I really don't want him to hate me. Like I said, I never had much friends and the friends I did have never were as close as Lavi is to me, and the crush on him I'm developing is not helping.

Lavi nodded, his eyes wide. "Whatever it is, I could never hate you Allen. You're to dear to me for me to hate you for a little secret. Except maybe if you killed somebody, I don't know I could live with being friends with a killer..." He muttered. I sweet dropped before looking away.

I took one last deep breath before blurting it out. I almost stumbled over my words, trying to say it as fast as possible, just wanting to get it over with.

"I'mwhiteclown..." Nothing but silence afterwards as Lavi looked at me with shock. Whatever it was he was expecting, this was not it.

Lavi's POV:

"What?!" What the hell?! Okay, I don't know what the hell I was expecting to come out of his mouth but this was definitely not it! What the hell?!

"I'm White Clown..." Allen repeated himself, a bit more clearly this time though. I just can't believe it! Okay, I guess I can. I mean, when he sings he just sounds too much like White Clown and he also acts a lot like him. I've been hanging around enough with the both of them lately to see some resembles but this is just... what the hell?! I think my brain just exploded...

"Y-you can't be... no way..." I backed away slightly, not wanting to believe it. No way was my crush my idol, there was just no way!

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, I really am. I've been trying to figure out a way to tell you but I just didn't know how to! I knew you'd get angry at me, you probably don't want to see my any longer. I just... I guess it was stupid to think you'd still be my friend after I kept a secret as huge as this from you... I'm sorry...-"

"Would you shut up for a minute!" I interrupt him. He's nervous, but fuck, I don't know what to do! I was thinking about this for the last week or so but for it to be actually true! Wow, just, wow... "Wow..." I ran a hand through my hair, trying to distract myself for a bit. "Wow..." I repeat that for a few times, trying to get my head straight... this was just too much...

I don't hate Allen, I really don't. I'm also not disappointed or anything really. If anything I like him even more. Does that sound strange? It probably does. I mean, he's probably my best friend, I can rely on him, depend on him. Even as White Clown the only thing he seemed to do was encourage me to make more brilliant music. Even though I never told White Clown much about myself, he seems to know so much about me already. I guess now it all makes sense.

I could see Allen's eyes dim with sadness, probably taking my silence as a bad sign. I don't want him to think I hate him now. I don't want him to think I never want to speak to him ever again. He was moving to stand up and leave, probably thinking about giving me some space to think. I didn't want him to leave, I wanted him to stay right there, as close to me as possible. Yeah, over the last few weeks my feelings for my little buddy have grown and I think it's full out 'love' right now. Yep, I fell in love with me best friend's little brother who I only know for a few weeks and who is apparently also my idol.

My life is just fucked up like that I guess.

To prevent him from leaving I latched myself to his waist like I did before, only I hugged him a bit tighter than before and I might be a bit more possessive. I could feel him tens, probably thinking I was gonna hurt him or something. I could never...

"Don't leave..." I mutter in his stomach, because that's where my face is directed at. I bet he's blushing now. "I'm not mad or anything, I'm just... surprized..." He sighed again and started patting my hair like he did before. I never told anyone but someone patting my hair like that is one of my secret pleasures. When someone does that I relax completely and sometimes it causes me to not be able to think straight. But right now it seems to make my mind think more logical.

"I guess I can understand you were afraid of telling me, I would be too I guess... but I'm not mad... I could never be mad at you." I could feel him relax more and more with every word I say. "I guess I kind of suspected something like this... I mean, hanging around with you or 'Grey', as you insisted me on calling you, was too much alike for you two to be two different people."

"I'm sorry..." He whispered. I could hear his voice cracking. Oh gosh! If there is something I don't want is him crying! I've never seen him cry but lately I've noticed him getting more emotional by the day! As White Clown he said he had a lot of stress organizing everything and all but now that I know that Allen is Grey... school and organizing the concert and he has also been struggling with telling me who he really is... Everybody would be over loaded! I sat up quickly, pulling him into my arms. I could feel him burry his face in my shirt and I felt the tears soak into the fabric, but I don't care at the moment. The one I love the most is hurting right now, and even though he doesn't know I love him I still want to be the one who keeps him together, the one he can thrust and depend on.

"T-Thank you... I-I don't w-want you to b-be a-angry with m-me..." He muttered between hiccups. I stroke his hair soothingly, like he did to me before. "I-I'm s-so s-s-sorry.." he kept muttering.

"Don't be Allen. I'm not mad, I get that you were afraid and everything. I don't blame you. Besides, I don't get how you would be able to handle all of this stress! How do you do that! If there is some sort of trick please teach me! I wanna know how you do it!" I tried to lighten the mood a bit. It really wasn't that big a deal to me. Okay, maybe it was, but what can I say? I love Allen just too much.

"Heh, s-sorry..." I'm glad I could make him smile, even if just a little. Allen pulled back slightly, rubbing his eyes trying to get rid of the tears. He's so cute like that, I could kiss him right now, but I don't think that now is the appropriate time for that. "I was just really scared... I'm sorry.. I s-should have told you sooner... I shouldn't have kept this a secret. I mean, we're band mates, we should tell each other everything or else the band will fall apart!" I smiled, I'm glad he seems to be calming down.

"Now that that is out of your system, can you stop saying you're sorry? There's nothing to be sorry about anyway! Now let's go!" I could see the confused look on his beautiful grey eyes. I guess now I know why he wanted me to call him Grey when he was White Clown.

"W-where too?!" He asked as I took his hand and dragged him towards the exit of the park. I saw Kanda drag Alma out of it earlier and Komui came to pic Lenalee up around the same time so it was just Allen and me now.

"To that restaurant I promised to take you too when you first got here of course!"

"Whaaaaaaat?!" The shout could be heard from a few blocks down, I'm sure. The concert is in about a week from now and Allen just found out something crucial was missing.

"How can you not have a name for the band yet?!" Yeah that. We've been in this band for about three year now and we hadn't decided on a name yet.

Alma did his best to calm his little brother down. I'm surprised he even dared to. "I... uhm... we just couldn't decide on a name..." He smiled sheepishly. For once he wasn't sitting on Kanda's lap. That always seemed to piss Allen off so now he was sitting as far away from Kanda as possible, and from Allen in fear of dying.

"It's true..." I decided to defend my band mate. I may have a crush on Allen but that doesn't mean I'm just gonna let him kill my best friend! "No one could think of an appropriate name for the band so we decided to just let it rest and we'd figure it out sometime later..."

"Lavi..." Allen sighed. I'm not sure if that's a good thing. He slummed down on the couch behind him and closed his eyes. "Don't you understand the importance of a name?" He was looking at me with those eyes! That's not fair! "A name makes people know you, it's an identity. Not only can people look you up by that name it'll also be on your CD's, t-shirts, posters, all that. A name is, besides the music, the most important thing of the band! How can you not have one yet?" He's making me feel guilty with those eyes.

"You don't have to be so angry." Lenalee decided to put in a word too. She, surprisingly hadn't been angry with Allen when he told her his secret and she had accepted it easily to everybody's amazement. "It's not like you can blame us for not agreeing with the name 'Lavi's musketeers' or 'Lavi and Co'..." Great Lenalee, now you made my little white angel glare at me!

I wanted to whine out loud but for once I was being serious. I don't think Alma has ever seen me serious before so it's not a surprise that he's looking at me like I'm some kind of animal in a zoo. "Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry. But, enough of that. I think we've procrastinated enough now and we should think of a name."

Allen actually smiled at me. It was just a small smile, but it was a smile nonetheless! It made me feel warm inside and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Well said, now could you two stop flirting with each other and actually think of something..."

"Look who's talking Bakanda. You don't seem to mid so much when it's Alma flirting with you~" Oh my God! Allen actually managed to make Kanda blush! Alma was silently giggling in the corner he was sitting in and Lenalee was looking at Kanda like he was an alien.

"Chè, shut it, beansprout..." Kanda muttered angrily.

Throughout this ordeal I couldn't help but notice how Allen didn't deny the 'us flirting'-part.

"guys..." Lenalee sighed silently as she sipped her soda. She rolled her eyes which made Alma pout. "Now to the matter at hand. Shouldn't we come up with a name then? I mean the almighty White Clown said so..." Did I say she excepted Allen being White Clown? I meant that she was so shocked and angry that she was the last one to know that she wouldn't talk to Allen for a week and only glared at him until Allen got her the biggest bouquet roses he could find and a month's worth chocolate supply.

"I agree..." Allen took some empty sheets of paper and handed them over to everyone with a pen. "Come up with some names in the next fifteen minutes. Afterwards I'll gather the papers, read through it once and pick the best once so Tyki can look through them. He'll know what the best name would be for the band."

Nothing was said after that. Alma silently sat down next to Kanda while Lenalee went to the drums, she said she always got more inspiration when she was sitting closer to the drums than anywhere else. Allen sat down next to me, a little bit too close for just a normal friend to sit but I'm not gonna send him away. I could feel the warmth radiating from his body and I could smell his shampoo faintly. Fruity and flowery, it suited him.

After fifteen minutes Allen got up without saying a word and took all the papers from everyone. "Let's see..." He frowned as he read through the papers. I noticed he always frowned when he was concentrating or whenever he's really serious. It's cute but I'd rather see him smiling or blushing, though only if I'm the cause.

"Hmm.." He was scribbling something on the papers and I could see him furiously scribbling through some of the names. "I like 'Mask Distorted'..." Yes! That was one of mine! "...and 'Seventh Conspiracy', 'Legal Mouse' sound fun too..." He was mostly mumbling to himself. From the corner of my eye I could see Kanda raise an eyebrow. I'm guessing one of those names was his and he probably never expected Allen to pick one of his names.

"Let's see... 'Friendship Of Hairless' is a good one too..." Yay, another one from me! I don't know why that makes me so happy but it just does. " Oh, Haha, who the hell came up with 'Cornered Midget' hu? I'm not that small!" Alma avoided looking directly at Allen. Allen sand a glare his way before going on with reading. "' Paint Crate' is a good one too and 'Down Ego',' Ivory Hairy' sound okay too... but I gotta say that my favourite would be 'Composed'... who came up with that one?"

"That would be meeee~!" I jumped up happily and hugged him. I'm so happy he liked my name! Not like the others who hated all my attempts of thinking of a name. The never appreciate my greatness!

Allen patted my head while he was trying to escape my dead grip. "Yeah, yeah, but it's not really up to me to decide though... firstly, does everybody agree on the names?" Everybody nodded. "Good, then I'll let Tyki pick one." We all followed him to the living room stiffly where Tyki was watching some TV, almost falling asleep. Allen hit him on the head with a book he picked up on his way, that woke him right up.

"What?! What was that for?!" Tyki whined from the floor where he landed after that rude interruption. Allen didn't say a word, he just threw the papers in his lap and sat down. He motioned for us to sit down too. When I sat down next to him he told me to relax.

"I can't.." I whispered. "This is a part of our future. People will know us by this name! How can you tell me to relax?! How are you so relaxed?" Allen really is a mystery.

Allen stood up and pulled me with him. He first went to the kitchen to get two water bottles before leading me to his room. He left everyone to sit with Tyki as he was reading through our ideas.

"You wanna know how I'm this relaxed?" Allen asked me when he dropped himself on his bed and opened his bottle. I didn't know where to sit so I just sat down on one of the corners of the bed, not too far away from him, and drank a bit from my own bottle. I don't think I'm supposed to give an answer so I didn't say anything, just waiting for him to say something.

First he sighed before rolling over so he was looking at me. "I'm not really relaxed. My name now, 'White Clown', when I came up with that name... Tyki first didn't agree with it but I used to have a friend, I guess you could say he's sort of my ex, he died in a car accident..."

"I'm sorry to hear that..." He looked so sad, I just wanted to wrap my arm around him and hold him like I did when he told me his secret. But I felt kinda angry, how dare someone hold Allen the way I want to!

Allen waved my comment away. "It's nothing really, it's been a while, I got over it. Anyway, he died a little before I met the Earl, the head of the company I sing for. He used to always call me a white clown, with my white hair and I'm a real klutz. To honor him I guess I chose that name..."Allen was playing with the corner of his sheets. I don't think he noticed himself but I did and I'm glad for that, he looks so cute staring off in space while fiddling with the fabric, occasionally sipping from his bottle.

"I'm everything but calm right now to tell you the truth. I guess hanging around in the music world for so long made me hide my real emotions partly. You can't show your distress in this world, people will trample all over you if you do. But even now... I wanted to start over, I've had enough of hiding all the time, I want people to know me, not 'White Clown'. Sure, it's appealing to people, they love mystery. But I've had enough. So now I want people to know me, but I don't want to do this on my own, I can't."

I slowly crawled up the bed so I was closer to Allen. I smiled slightly as I rubbed his arm soothingly. "You're not alone. You have Alma and Lenalee and even Kanda! And of course me! Don't forget we're there for you and no matter what we'll always have your back." He smiled as he looked in my eye. It kinda looked like he was searching for something, maybe proof of me lying? Well too bad for him I'm not lying!

"I can understand what you're going through partly I think, at least I can picture it somewhat. But Allen you don't have to carry all that on your own. I'm glad you trusted us enough to tell us what you've been hiding, I really am. But now you have to let us in. even though you told us you're still doing everything on your own! Just... if you need anything just tell us, we'll do everything in our powers to help you." Without thinking I leaned forwards and kissed him lightly on his forehead. His expression would have been funny had I not been so scared. His eyes were wide and I could see a furious blush covering his cheeks. Now, I could say it was just an accident and tell him I did that because I love him like a little brother but then I would be lying and my mom always told me lying was bad. So instead I beat myself up in my mind.

"W-wha-..." He mumbled shocked. I quickly sat up right, not looking at him.

"Oh my God...!" I whispered. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have done that, right? Crap, I fucked up didn't I? damn it..!" While I was beating myself up Allen started laughing. It was a 'you're an idiot and I don't ever want to see you ever again'-laugh, nor was it a 'this is an awkward situation, let's make it less awkward'-laugh. It was just a happy laugh, a laugh to say 'I'm happy to be alive' or 'I'm happy to share this moment with you'. I couldn't help but laugh too.

"Oh dear God!" Allen gasped after a while. Allen was still smiling when he turned to look at me but I noticed he had a more serious aura around him. "If that meant what I think it meant I'm not too sure how to react." I just nodded understanding. Hell, I wouldn't even know what to say! I think Allen handles the situation rather well, considering.

"I understand I guess... I'm sorry if I made things awkward." Allen was still blushing but combined with his smile he looked so much more innocent and happy, just like an angel.

"I guess it's okay... I'll think about it I guess... God, Alma is gonna kill us if he found out!" He chuckled as he took my hand and dragged me to the door. Right before he opened the door he planted a kiss on my cheek and then went to join the others in the living room. I just stood there, chocked. This means he likes me back, right? I mean, to a certain extent, right, right?

After about five minutes I think, time isn't really on my mind right now, I shook my head and smiled, holding my cheek, and entered the living room. At least I didn't totally fuck up!

"What did you two do?" Alma asked suspiciously. Allen just looked innocently to his brother.

"Nothing brother dear, we just talked for a bit." Alma was about to say something but Tyki interrupted him.

"I have decided! The band will from now on be known as Composed!"

Can this day get any better?!

[A/N]: So, what did you think? oO Was it worth the wait? Or not? probably not... *hangs head in shame* I'm sooorryyyyyy~! Dx

Lavi: *pats* It's okay, you've tried
Allen: Yeah, plus you're a nice person, doesn't that count as well?
Lavi: Yeah! I think that counts
CC: Nooo! *Whines* I'm sooo sorryyyyyyy~~!
Tyki: *sigh* She would like some review and whatever... just do whatever... I really couldn't care less.. *walks off while lightning a cigarette*
Neah: *runs after him* Stop that Tyki~ Smoking is bad for you~
Tyki: So? CC does so too doesn't she?
CC: Leave me alone! Dx can't you see I'm being depressed over here?! *pouting in corner*