Summary: Balthazar is plagued with the pain of loving someone who doesn't feel the same. He's in love with his brother, who doesn't even know. Except, Castiel does know and he uses to lure his traitorous brother into a false sense of security.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, for the last time.
AN: So, sad times for Balthy here guys. Spoilers for S6. Set in er, 6x22, but mentions some other shit, you know how it is. Balthy :'(. Little bit of transcript times, but not much.
Warnings: Slash, kissing, character death, angst, unrequited love, requited love between two people, but neither having acted on it. Er…I think that may be it? Maybe swearing, actually. Balthy hates Dean too. I don't hate Dean.

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Balthazar hated Dean Winchester, detested him even. He had disliked him from the very first moment he met him, and this had seen turned into a strong sense of loathing before he even properly knew the boy, but it was not without reason. In fact, there were a few. The first was fairly trivial; the elder Winchester was whiny, arrogant and annoying. The second reason was that he treated his darling brother, Cassie, like utter crap. He was always ordering him about and berating him and just generally behaving toward the trench coated angel in a way that royally pissed him off. Particularly in light of Castiel's plan and seeking purgatory, he'd entirely turned his back on him, after everything. The third reason was that for some reason or another, the stupid little hunter had gained Castiel's love. He was pretty sure that the love was very much reciprocal, but neither had ever acted on it. And he thanked the Lord for small mercies that it was the case. Now, he wasn't just being an overprotective big brother, no, there was a justification other than that for why the third factor bothered him so much. Balthazar was very much in love with his younger brother, who only ever seemed to have eyes for the stupid little human in question. The concept of Castiel loving a human over him was sickening, but he didn't blame his brother. After all, the heart apparently wants what the heart wants. If he hadn't cared so much for Castiel, he probably would have destroyed, or at least severely maimed or traumatised the elder Winchester. However, for as long as such an act would hurt the younger celestial, he knew he would never do it. He didn't quite know when he begun to love Castiel, but had managed to pinpoint as beginning around the point where Cassie and the wonder boys had come to get him after he'd bought the boy's soul. It was fairly quick and by the time he even realised what was going on, the water was up to his neck and he was drowning in it. Drowning in love. He should've resisted it, swam away, or at least tried to have quelled it because maybe then he would've been able to save himself from the ever present turmoil and agony. Yet, he carried on, never telling anyone, and masking negative emotions with his usual jokes, sarcasm and teasing smiles, anything to stop people from detecting that he was practically dying on the inside.

When he'd confronted his brother about what he was doing and Castiel had asked for his loyalty, he'd given it to him in a heartbeat, despite his misgivings. However, he soon found himself wishing for a way to stop his brother, to save him from self-destruction, so despite his hatred for Dean he allied himself with the Winchester clan and became a double agent for them. Both working with Castiel and betraying him at the same time. Only true love could possibly be the reason for his loyalty and disloyalty to Castiel, he knew. It was a terrible battle between undying and unquestioning devotion and going against him in order to stop him from achieving his ultimate goal, tarnishing himself and maybe even destroying himself with such an act. In the end, he had settled for both. Loyalty and disloyalty. Devotion and determination to stop his brother. Perhaps he should have betrayed him out right; perhaps that would have been the better thing to do. And yet, he couldn't; because he cared too much for him and because he wouldn't have been able to bear the bitterness and hurt in those beautiful cobalt eyes.

He shook his head, snapping out of his little reverie. Castiel had called him a couple of minutes ago, he really ought to go and see what the matter was. He sighed and shrugged slightly. He vanished, only to appear seconds later in Crowley's lab. He glanced around, spotting his brother immediately; sat holding the jar of blood, half virgin, half purgatory creature, staring at it and looking decidedly troubled. He couldn't say he blamed him, the poor guy. He walked over to the other angel, flashing him a small smile.
"You called, Cassie?" he teased, leaning against the side of a nearby counter.
"Yes," Castiel acknowledged, glancing at him. "We have a problem. Dean is on his way."
"Really?" the blond asked, carefully feigning slight surprise. "How did he even know where we were?" Castiel spared the jar one last glance and then placed it down on the floor, sighing.
"Apparently we have a Judas in our midst."
"Ah," Balthazar begun, forcing a chuckle and shaking his head. He was thankful that there were several other angels involved in this operation, particularly those who frequently stood on guard. "Who is it? I bet it's that bloody little cherub, isn't it?"
"I don't know," the younger Celestial responded, slowly standing up. He cleared his throat and glanced at his brother. "I-I need you to find out though."
"Of course. Right away, Cassie, right away," the blond acknowledged, a slight note of nervousness slipping into his tone. "What do you want me to do about Dean?"
"Nothing," Castiel said softly, turning away. "I'll handle him myself."
"Castiel?" Balthazar murmured, reaching out and laying a hand on his shoulder. "Are you alright, brother?"
"First Sam and Dean…And now this," the younger angel responded solemnly. "I am doing my best in impossible circumstances, with the intent of saving this world and heaven. My friends, they abandon me, plot against me. It's…It's difficult to understand."
"Well, you've…You've always got little old me," Balthazar assured him, his tone light and reassuring but a wave of guilt and agony crashing into him. He was betraying Castiel too and he felt absolutely terrible for it. If only he'd been able to be completely loyal to him, perhaps if he didn't have such strong feelings it would be easier. Plus, Castiel didn't have him in the right way. So that just added insult to injury.

The younger celestial nodded slowly, turning around to face him. He forced a small smile and took a few steps towards his brother, causing him to frown uncertainly.
"Cas?"
"Balthazar…" Castiel acknowledged quietly. With no further warning, his hand snaked out grabbing the front of Balthazar's jacket and pulling him into a rough kiss. The blond stiffened in shock, his eyes widening comically. After a moment of pure shock, he gained controlled of his vessel enough to respond; deepening the kiss and dominating Castiel's mouth in seconds. He grabbed the trench coat and pulled him closer, fingers refusing to let go as if he were worried that the other angel were about to disappear. Finally, the Cassie knew. He'd finally opened his eyes enough to realise. That alone was enough to have his grace burning brightly with joy inside him. Maybe Castiel didn't necessarily feel as strongly as him, but it didn't matter because in that moment…He believed that he could, that he was able to. It was a moment that he never wanted to be over, but all things had to come to an end. After about a minute, Castiel pulled away, breaking the kiss and taking a small step back. He nodded slowly once more, a slight smile slipping onto his somewhat reddened lips.
"Yes, brother. I'll always have you," he acknowledged calmly. He vanished with no warning, provoking the other angel to frown and glance about the room, dazed and seeking him. He didn't think to look behind him though.

Castiel appeared behind his brother, his eyes flashing in fury and bitterness, sadness and regret all at once. It was a strange, unpleasant mix of emotions but he knew what he had to do. His blade appeared in his hand and with no hesitation; he stabbed it through his brother's back, angling it upwards. Balthazar stiffened, groaning and staring down at the blade. He turned his head, glancing over his shoulder to see that Castiel was the one who had stabbed him. No… He gasped in a combination of pain and shock.
"Cas…" he managed to murmur, his eyes unconsciously filling with tears, before it all begun to end. His mouth and eyes were filled with the ethereal glow of his grace, which expanded to light up the whole building with its stark white glare. He fell forwards, his large, impressive wings instantly being etched onto the ground. Just before he'd died, he realised something that made him glad of the oncoming death; Castiel had no feelings for him at all. He had only kissed him to lure him into a false sense of security so he could plunge his blade into his back.