A/N Thankers for the favorites/reviews/follows! Sorry for the delay...my puppy apparently thought the adapter for my laptop would be a delicious snack.

Here is the part of the story where you come in! I know where this story is going (I have it all mapped out) but I haven't quite decided who I want to be the "father figure" type character yet. Shall it be Tony? Bruce? Thor? Steve? Fury? Clint? Vote in a review (or message me if you'd really like to) and I'll let you make the decision for me. :)

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"Thor?" Tony caught sight of the Thunder God as soon as he rounded the corner into the kitchen. The man looked positively devastated.

"I am not in the mood for company, Tony Stark." He took a bite of a blueberry Poptart and swallowed it back with a mouth full of chocolate milk. Tony personally preferred vodka chased with rum when he was feeling low, but to each their own.

"I think you may be in the mood for this. You see, I think there was perhaps a little...well, a big, misunderstanding earlier and I have someone here who would like to clear it up with you." Tony led the boy into the kitchen so that Thor could clearly see whom he was referring. "Loki, do you have something you'd like to say?"

Loki looked up at Tony with wide eyes before stepping closer to Thor, "My apologies. I did not realize that my actions would upset you. Tony has informed me that you were offended by my stating that you were not my brother. Pray, sir, I did not mean any harm by it. The brother I know is near my own age and I did not recognize him behind the face of an adult warrior. I really didn't mean..." but the boy was cut off as his little face was smothered into the chest of a very pleased Norse God.

"Oh, brother! It warms my heart to hear you speak such words!" He squeezed the boy harder until he was pushing against him trying to free his nose to find some air.

"I am glad I could clear up the misunderstanding." Loki said when he was finally able to breathe in enough air to speak, "I would find it a great honor if we could speak in depth about the many glorious battles in which you must have participated.."

"Oh, my dear brother, I would be honored to share battle tales with you but first..."

"But first," A still angry looking Nick Fury interrupted, "Meeting in the conference room. Now."

"I think he means NOW." Tony narrowed his eyes at the brothers playfully and shook his head in mock disapproval before they followed Fury out of the room.

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"So, Earth's mightiest warriors have some how managed to piss off some magical harpie from some distant planet. Impressive. Usually the people you piss off are at least confined to this solar system." Fury spoke, arms crossed in anger, as soon as the last team member was in their seat around the table.

"I thought she was pretty." Tasha shrugged.

"Can it, Romanoff. The world isn't full of unicorns." Clint spoke from his seat to Fury's left. Fury glanced at him, eyebrows raised but said nothing.

"I don't think she was pissed off at us..." Bruce spoke up shyly. "I think she was trying to help us."

"Yeah? What makes you say that? Cause the way I see it? I got one agent who is acting like a lovestruck teenager and another that can't control his emotions at all. I have Tony Stark who, as much as I'd like for him to keep his mouth shut, can't go ten minutes without sputtering on whatever nonsense is running through his mind that can't escape through his big mouth. I have a super soldier who wants to pet the unicorns with Romanoff all day. I have a demigod villain who is barely out of diapers. His brother, well, he knows no lies and you...what was it that you were given again?"

"Control over my life!" Bruce hollers as he slams a fist on the table. The team members who are currently capable of the emotion, watch Bruce warily, looking for any sign of green skin.

"Friend, Bruce..."

"It's fine, Thor. That's what I'm saying. I haven't felt the other guy trying to get out at all but earlier in the bathroom...I...I don't know what made me try it but..." And suddenly, where there once stood a meek, dark-haired scientist, now stood a gigantic, green, monster.

Loki bolted for the kitchen, eyes wide with fear. Thor followed closely behind, "He will not bring harm to you, brother!"

Natasha smiled dreamily, "Green suits him, don't you think?"

Fury drew his gun but didn't aim it and next to him, Clint did the same with his bow and arrow. "Calm yourself, Banner," Fury spoke is mock tranquility.

"I am calm." The soft voice of Bruce Banner coming from the mouth of the Hulk was startling to say the least. "That's what I'm trying to say...I can control it." And suddenly, he was Banner again. Pulling on the suit jacket draped on the chair behind him. "I have a chance at a normal life because...because..." And then he is gone. Rushing from the room to hide his tears.

"That was just beautiful!" Clint weeps and then he is rushing from the room as well.

"Well then, that pretty much proves my point. We're up one on Banner, up one on Stark, down one on Barton, down one on Romanoff, down one on Rogers, and who the hell knows about Thor since he's too busy playing babysitter to stay put for five minutes!"

"Look, none of us are incapacitated. I can still suit up, Banner is still a rage monster, Clint can still string a bow, Steve can still hold his shield, Natasha can still wield a knife, and Thor can still swing a hammer. Maybe this will all blow over before any of us are needed but if not, well, we'll jump that hurdle when it comes." Tony looks like he wants to vomit by the end of the sentence.

Fury smirks, "How much did it hurt to choke that out without any of your witty little nick names?" He smirks again at the glare he receives in response, "Try to straighten up your team, Stark. S.H.I.E.L.D will leave the tower for now but I expect to be notified the moment anything goes amiss." And with a final dramatic swoop of his leather trench coat, he is storming from the room, a horde of agents following in his wake.

"Well, that went over well!" Steve smiles genuinely after they are all gone. "Shall we see what is happening with Thor and Loki? Maybe we can all watch a movie together!"

Tony clenches his jaw at the sarcasm that wants to, but can't spew out of his mouth and then simply nods. He silently bets himself a new car that whatever movie the Captain chooses will be a. animated and b. star fluffy little animals.

They enter the kitchen side-by-side and find a rather amusing sight. Thor has the entire upper half of his very large body shoved inside of a cabinet that was certainly not meant to hold anything of such mass. "Loki, brother, the monster is not the green uncle of the Frost Giants. He is simply a scientist who turns into a friendly beast. He shall not harm you!"

"He has you fooled, brother!" A small voice comes from within the cupboard, "I shall come out and he shall eat me! I shall be an appetizer for him before he devours you!"

Nice ass, Thor. That of course, does not manage to work past Tony's lips as he stares at the wiggling derriere protruding from the cupboard. He sputters a moment before settling on, "Need any help?"

"Tell him we can watch Lady and the Tramp if he comes out!" Steve is almost jumping for joy. Tony rolls his eyes and then mentally begins choosing the new car he is going to purchase himself.

"Brother, would you like to see a box full of moving, tiny people? It is Midgardian magic!"

"They have magic on Midgard?" The disembodied voice is skeptical but intrigued.

"Of course we do!" Tony calls out because if he can't choke out the sarcasm, at least he can mess with the mind of a tiny Loki. "The boxes are full of people and even colored animals! We are going to watch a story about two dogs and some bitchy cats!"

Thor narrows his eyes at the lie about the TV but doesn't mention it out loud. "I don't think we should teach him the word 'bitchy'."

Tony shrugs his apology and then points to the cabinet where a small head is emerging. "Can we really watch a moving story? I should think I would enjoy seeing such a sight. Is the green giant going to be there?"

"He's not green anymore!" Steve chirps and then frowns, "You're covered in peanut butter." His frown quickly reverts into a beaming smile, "That looks like fun!"

"You're not doing it too." An image of Steve covered in chunky peanut butter runs through his mind and Tony mentally shudders. "uh, I think he needs a shower first, Thor."

"Yes, I believe so. How did you come to be covered in this substance, brother?"

Loki blushes, "It smelled quite foul and I thought it would keep the beast away."

"Smells foul? Peanut butter? It's delicious!" Steve laughs and everyone else eyes him warily.

Thor speaks as they headed for the nearest shower-equipped bathroom."My brother had a very peculiar appetite at this age. The only food I can remember our mother being able to get him to consume is grapes. Grapes and water."

"I like grapes and water." Loki answers quietly as they step into the bathroom. Steve fishes around for a towel and some shampoo while Tony gives Loki a quick lesson on how to control the shower. Thor leaves to track down some clean clothes that will fit a seven-year-old as Tony and Steve move into the hallway and close the door behind them. They decide to wait in the next room, a spare bedroom, so Loki can easily find them after his shower. Thor just reaches the room where they are sitting when they hear the screaming coming from the bathroom.

In all the world, three men have never rushed into a bathroom together more quickly.

"Brother! What is wrong!?" Thor yanks back the curtain and wraps the towel around Loki as he pulls him from the tub.

"Some villain has replaced the hair soap with a poison most foul!" Loki screeches as he rubs at his eyes.

Steve grabs the shampoo bottle from the floor of the tub where it has been dropped and sniffs the contents, "It's just normal shampoo...Herbal Essences."

"It's burning my eyes!" Loki shrieks more loudly than before as Thor tries to gently pull his arms down to prevent him from injuring his eyes.

Tony sighs at the drama, "Jarvis, add tear-free shampoo to the shopping list."