"Alright Timmy, come on out."

"No guys, I'm not coming out."

"You promised."

"I changed my mind, alright, you win, I'm not gonna be a stripper."

"Too late Timmy, a challenge has been issued, you have to do it, you gotta show us." Jason and Dick giggled wickedly, sitting next to each other on a couch they had pulled up in front of the batpoles with popcorn.

Jason popped a handful into his mouth and yelled, "Come on Tim, we don't have all day."

"Guys", Tim whined, "please, it's freezing down here and I look ridiculous. I'm getting dressed."

"Nah ah", Dick screamed, "no you're not kiddo, you're coming out and I expect a lap dance ASAP!"

"Dick", Tim squealed, "this is embarrassing."

"You're right", Jason roared, "it is embarrassing, that's why we're making you do it."

"Come on little bird, might as well get it over with", Dick yelled, "the sooner you do, the sooner we can show the pictures to everyone we know."

Tim made a noise that sounded an awful lot like a sob and whimpered, "Dick, Jay, I don't wanna. I'm gonna start crying in a minute."

"We don't care", Dick called, "for the next fifteen minutes we are immune to your tears."

"Plus I have bread", Jason added, "so I'm comfortable and ready for some entertainment." Smiling, he took a big bite of his long loaf of French bread and shoveled in another handful of popcorn.

"Alright, alright", Tim whimpered finally, "here I come."

"Wait a sec," Dick said, and pressed the play button on the I-pod speaker he had beside him. The sounds of Candyman by Christina Agulara filled the cave.

"I'm not coming out to that", Tim shrieked.

"Ohh yes you are", Jason called, and to Dick he said, "that song's a nice touch, it'll add validity to the whole thing."

"I know", Dick agreed, "picked it out myself."

"Why do you even own that song?" Tim wailed.

"This is one of my favorite songs", Dick replied, appalled.

"Come on", Jason yelled. Tim gave another whimpering sigh and shuffled out of the shadows. Dick and Jason almost fell off the couch, they were laughing so hard. In order to find the perfect thing for Tim to wear, Jason and Dick had gone to the Red Hood's favorite sleazy store, Kicks and Dicks and, amid many strange looks, picked out the perfect outfit for Tim.

Covered in red sequences and feathers, the thong Tim had on was rather magnificent, not that the former boy wonder thought so. Standing in front of his howling brothers, he was swiftly turning as red as his little feathered vest. Jason had decided the robin motif would be appropriate and clearly, he had been correct. "Can I go get dressed now?" Tim whimpered, his feathered headband shifting slightly in his tousled dark hair.

"No", Dick said, gasping, "you have to dance."

"Go on", Jason wheezed, still trying to regain all the air he'd lost in laughing so hard, "dance." Tim gave a little strangled sound and vibrated in place. "That's not dancing", Jason said, "come on, you can do better than that, I want to see some hip action."

"Yea Tim", Dick called, "lets see you move!" Tim slowly twitched his hips, all the while whimpering and gnawing his bottom lip as the little bells around his waist jingled lightly. Both his brothers whooped loudly, hopping up and down on the couch.

"Yea, go Magic Tim, you ring them bells!" Jason howled.

"Guys stop", Tim keened, "please!"

"Tim", Jason said, "You really leave much to be desired as a stripper. You just don't have your heart in what you're doing."

"Of course not", Tim hissed, "I look like an idiot!"

"This should teach you not to question our judgment on these things little Timmy", Dick said, "when we say you can't be a stripper, it's for good reason."

"What the hell is my son wearing!" All three boys turned towards the roar that had come from the entrance to the cave, where Bruce and Damian were just hopping out of the batmobile. Damian collapsed against the side of the car, roaring with laughter. Tim gave him a scowl and burst into tears. Bruce strode over angrily and put his cape around Tim, covering the former boy wonder completely, and pressed him to himself.

Tim buried his head in the Dark Knight's chest and sobbed, "Bruce, they're trying to kill me."

"Aww Timmy", Dick said, "we just wanted to take pictures and laugh at you for a little while. No harm done."

"Pictures", Bruce said, "you better not have taken pictures."

"Of course we took pictures", Jason scoffed, "these are going on the internet."

"No they're not", Bruce replied angrily, "I'm not letting people see those. No one is allowed to think dirty thoughts about my son." Dick rolled his eyes.

"Here Timmy", Jason said, "let me show you what a real stripper is supposed to look like." With that, he grabbed hold of the front of his pants and shirt and ripped them off, revealing his own blue, sparkling thong. Everyone stared at him. "Huh, huh" Jason said, flexing his muscles, "What do you guys think, hot right?"

"There's something wrong with you", Bruce said flatly, "come on Tim, lets get you upstairs. You can get dressed and I'll take you to that math study group you like so much."

"Can we do some calculus together?" Tim asked softly.

"Of course", Bruce replied, "maybe even trigonometry as well."

"Ok," Tim agreed, wiping away his tears. Casting a venomous look at Dick and Jason, he walked up the stairs with Bruce.

"Well", Jason said, turning to Dick, "You wanna see me dance?"

"No", Dick replied with an incredulous look on his face, "I'd rather go to Tim's boring math club. Come on Damian, lets go play X-box."

"Ok", Damian said brightly, bounding over to Dick and clambering up onto his back for a ride. He turned to Jason for a moment, looking him over in disgust. "Freak", he scoffed, and with that Dick hauled him off.

"Fine", Jason called loudly, "I'll just go where I'm appreciated." With that, he started to stalk out of the cave, but paused after a moment, reconsidering.

"Hey, can I come play X-box with you guys?"

"If you put some pants on." Jason looked himself over.

"Alright", he agreed, and trotted after Dick.