A/N: Okay, I have just decided I would like to publish a complete and utter crack fic. This is meant to be extremely ridiculous and borderline stupid. No flames, please! I hope you enjoy. Reviews feed this monster.

Kurt looked in the mirror and he was loving what he saw. To put it short, he looked like sex. His brand new Forever 21 booty shorts hugged his butt just right and his neon American Eagle crop top showed off his toned tummy. Ever since he lost that extra hundred pounds he has been hell-bent on showing off his hot bod.

On the other side of town Blaine Anderson was piling mountains of hair gel to his abused hair and practicing his charming grin in the mirror. Dressed and his patented red capris and wacky socks he prepared to leave the house.

On the way out he mentally did a check of everything he needed for the day. Bronzer; check. Teeth whitener; check. Credit cards; check. Everything was in order. He sauntered out the door and made his way down the street.

Not two seconds later the most perfect piece of man entered his line of vision. Dressed in what had to be the latest fashion he was the picture of elegance and seduction. Their eyes locked and it was if the world seemed to fade away. Violins played and doves were released as two strangers fell in love on sight.

Ever so slowly, they made their way towards each other. Walking felt foreign; floating would have certainly been more appropriate.

"Hey there sexy." The tall lanky boy husked. He placed his delicate hands on his hips. Blaine noticed they were painted pink. He was perfect!

"H-hi. I'm Blaine, Blaine Anderson."

"Kurt Hummel. I know this sounds strange, but I feel as if I known you my whole life."

Blaine's eyes sparkled. He had felt the same way! "I know exactly what you mean," he smiled shyly. "Would you like to go out for dinner?"

"Dinner. I uh, don't really eat... dinner. How about we hang out at my place?" He purred.

At that Blaine became excited. Very, very excited... "I'll bring Monopoly! Or are you more of a Scrabble kind of guy?"

Kurt simply just stared at him and smirked. "You won't need any games, I have toys."

"That's convenient. Let's swap numbers, I'll call you later on." As the two exchanged telephones their minds raced with plans for the evening. Although their plans were very different, they both had one very important thing in common...

A/N: Let me know what you think! Review=Love