A Game of Cards

This is a one shot present for the 200th reviewer of my other story 'The Years in Between'. So this is dedicated to EkoCentric. Won't be much smut, but there will be very dirty things implied so this should be an M. If you are under the age limit of M set aside by Fanfiction…. Ah I'm not gonna report you, it's your life.

Anywho, EkoCentric thanks again and here you go.

Please review cause BioWare owns all this shit.


The Hanged Man was alive with activity, as was normal of the tavern. Drinks were flowing, music was playing, and the occasional bar fight was breaking out on the main floor. So a typical Kirkwall evening. The Champion of Kirkwall, Serah Hawke, sat in her usual place amongst her friends, between the pirate Isabela, and her lover Fenris. Hawke glanced down at the cards she had been dealt for the game of Diamond Back they were playing, for the fifth round in a row and sighed.

She had gotten this exact hand twice.

Varric and Isabela were obviously cheating, but still, you would think they could get a little more creative now and then.

"I'm out," Hawke laid her cards down with a sigh, taking in her companions. Anders folded, as did a confused Merrill, while Aveline growled and threw her cards on the table in a huff. She was seriously a bad loser. Fenris foolishly raised and Sebastian watched from the sides, refusing to take part in Gambling.

"Read 'em and weep." Isabela and Varric laid down a matching set of cards before they looked at each other with confusion.

"Rivaini?" Varric reached into his pocket.

"Yes Varric?" Isabela's golden eyes were trained on their identical hands.

"I know how I'm cheating, but are you using another pack of cards?" Varric laughed as Aveline glared at them both.

"That's it, since you two were cheating; again, we're going to play this hand again." The Guard spoke firmly, before she heard Hawke groan loudly, and turned to face her. "What are you groaning about?"

"We've been playing this same hand three times Aveline! I even stopped cheating!" Hawke groaned softly.

"You were cheating?" Fenris raised a curious black eyebrow at her.

"When am I not cheating?"

"That is true." Fenris chuckled quietly and Hawke smiled at him.

"Fine, let's play another game. Strip Wicked Grace!" Isabela cackled as she received another glare from around the table.

"After last time, I'm not so sure." Hawke took a swig of ale, before realising that the males of the group were looking at her with wide eyes.

"When did you and Isabela play Strip Wicked Grace?" Anders asked in awe, a slight blush on his cheek.

"A while ago. But I kept winning." Hawke smiled softly.

"Oh sweetling, that's only because I wanted to take my clothes off. You could never beat me normally." Isabela prodded with a smile.

"That a challenge?" Hawke grinned widely

"It is."

"Alright." Hawke snathed a pack of cards from Varric, much to the surprise, and shock of Fenris. "You all know the rules, instead of money the loser pays in clothes."

"Hawke," Fenris glowered at her. "This is not a good idea." She smiled at him, before giving him a quick, chaste kiss on the lips, then shuffling the cards.

"Relax Fenris. You're the only guy here to see me naked." Hawke laughed as Varric raised an eyebrow.

"Only guy? So the girls have seen you naked?" The dwarf smiled as he began scribbling on a scrap piece of paper.

"Sure. I've been naked around Isabela more times that I can count." Hawke smiled, before she felt a strong hand on her knee. She met Fenris' angry eyes and smiled. "Nothing happened, Fenris, you know that. You're the only one for me." She gripped his armoured hand reassuringly before she dealt cards around the table with a smile.

"Strip Wicked Grace it is." Isabela grinned like the cat that ate the canary as she looked at her hand. Everyone glanced around nervously as Isabela laid down her hand. "Who can beat this?" Fenris laid down a better hand and Hawke raised an eyebrow at him.

"You saw how I cheat didn't you?" Hawke smiled as he chuckled.

"I did, now armour off." He glared as she took of a single gauntlet and placed it the middle of the table, much to the frustration of the elf beside her.

"One item at a time," Hawke laughed as Fenris gathered the cards. He shuffled them twice before dealing around the table. He felt Hawke nudge him, and he glanced sideways at her. Hawke subtly gestured to Sebastian and Anders, who were looking at their cards with almost fear. He nodded and Hawke caught Varric and Isabela's eyes, waiting for a response. Varric grinned and laid down a perfect hand.

"Anyone? Or do I win?" The dwarf glanced around as everyone either folded gracefully or scowled and threw her cards on the table, unusual behaviour for the Captain of the Guard… "Choirboy, off with the clothes." Varric laughed as Sebastian swallowed softly, turning a pale shade of white before he stood and unbuckled his Andrastean belt. Hawke wolf whistled at him and he stopped to blush furiously while Hawke killed herself laughing with Isabela.

"Why do I have a very bad feeling about this?" Sebastian sighed heavily and Fenris chuckled darkly.

"Because, you're playing a game with Hawke."

Sebastain sighed as he tossed his belt into the centre and looked around, noticing an evil glint in the eyes of his friends.

"Oh dear Maker, what have I gotten myself into this time?"


Aveline hated losing.

Like really, hated losing.

Especially, when she; the Captain of the Kirkwall guard, was sitting around a tavern in her underclothes, next to several clothed rogues. She glanced around at a blushing Sebastian, who was sitting in his linens, next to an almost naked Anders. Hawke must have said to the others in their group to punish them, but after this game, that rogue was dead.

She shivered as Isabela tossed her underwear into the centre of the table, but still keeping her dress on.

"Last thing I have on." The pirate winked and Aveline sighed. How did she keep finding herself in situations like these?

"Can we actually win back some of our clothing?" Anders blushed a deep red.

"Nope, now the next hand." Varric dealt as Merrill walked back in, carrying a large tray of drinks. "Daisy, about time we were running dry up here."

"I'm so sorry… there were a lot of people down there and I kept getting shoved out of the way, so I had to wait a little longer till the drinks came." Merrill muttered quietly, avoiding looking at the scantily clad members of the group.

"Kitten, you just had to give your order to Edwina. She would have dealt with it." Isabela laughed softly as the dale blushed. Merrill had not been taking part in the games after Isabela had made a very lewd comment about the true roles of the Dalish Keepers 'satisfying' the needs of their clan, almost making the young elf cry.

"Do you want me to walk you home Merrill?" Hawke looked up from her cards at the quite Dale.

"No thank you Lethilan. I am fine just now." Merrill blushed and Hawke shrugged.

"Oh I win again." Hawke grinned wickedly as she heard a very nervous Anders swallow loudly. "Now what shall I have? Aveline's vest, Sebastian's leggings or Anders underpants? The choices are so fun." She laughed manically at their predicament.

"Why not someone else?" Anders asked through gritted teeth looking around the table. Hawke had the main body of her armour on, but no boots or cloves, Isabela had her dress on, but had taken off her boots and underwear, Varric had his coat off and Fenris sat there almost fully armoured.

"True…" Hawke said glancing around. She didn't want Fenris to feel too self-conscious about his markings, but she felt as if everyone was expecting her too. Hawke smiled at her lover before she laughed. "Alright, get it off."

Fenris narrowed his eyes at her, and sighed as he unbuckled his last gauntlet, leaving his arms bare, allowing the group to see more of his body than he would like. He was more than happy to be naked around Hawke, as that usually led to interesting evening, but being exposed out here made him feel strange. Much to his surprise, no one paid his markings any attention as the next hand was dealt. Fenris relaxed slightly before he felt Hawke's hand on his thigh, reassuring him. Or so he thought.

His eyes widened dramatically as her hand cupped him through his breeches. He looked over at her in shock, to see her looking at her cards as if she wasn't doing a thing. Her hand under the table might have looked like it was on his knee, or holding his hand.

She was holding something, but it definitely wasn't his hand.

Fenris swallowed as her hand gripped him firmly. He smiled to himself and laid down his cards.

Hawke wanted a war; he was more than happy to give her one. He watched the groups reaction as they realised he had the winning hand.

"Hawke, armour off." She raised an eyebrow at him and whispered softly.

"This wasn't the plan,"

"It is now." He smiled as she sighed and unbuckled the top of her Champions armour and began the long task of unbuckling it. Usually she had an extra pair of hand to help, but Fenris was enjoying his little strip show. Hawke grinned as she caught on to his plan.

Tricky elf.

Someone wanted to play, so play she shall.

Hawke dropped her armour to the wolf whistle of Isabela, adding to the large pile of clothes on the table, and she laughed, siting back next to Fenris. She felt her eyebrows recede to her hair line as Fenris' pinched her ass while she sat down. Hawke looked at the warrior, who was happily ignoring her, as he dealt the cards again.

"Yes! Finally!" Anders' eyed lit up as he finally got a decent hand and looked around the table. "Come on; let me trade this hand for a piece of clothes." Ander sighed as he saw Varric and Isabela nod to Hawke, who turned to him, her sweet, mischievous smile in place.

"Ok, we'll let you trade. But you need to go down to the bar and ask for some food." Hawke slapped his hand away as he reached for the pile of clothes.

"You… you mean like this?" Anders swallowed loudly as the group chuckled.

"Take your pick Blondie. Clothes or lose something. Your dignity is gone either way." Varric laughed deeply as the group turned to face their healer. Anders was silent for a moment before he sighed and stood up, turning for the door. Hawke, Isabela and Varric hollered and whistled at him as he descended the stairs.

Silence fell heavy upon the main floor of the Hanged Man, as everyone watched the healer from Ferelden, walked down the stairs, across to the bar and order food… in his underpants. A powerful, intelligent, kind healer, whom many of them had to visit at least once, was standing at the bar, in next to nothing, ordering food from an obviously stunned bartender.

Not something you see every day…

But hey, when in Kirkwall…

Anders turned to see the whole of the tavern was watching him with shock before he heard someone sniggering. It grew louder until the whole building was practically shaking with laughter. Anders growled as he blushed and stormed his way back up to Varric's suite where Hawke handed him his coat.

"I want my trousers."

"But you're getting your coat." Isabela laughed as the mage fumed, before he began to glow slightly, Justice appearing behind his eyes. Hawke felt Fenris stiffen beside her and she clasped his large hand in hers. He squeezed tightly and Hawke was sure he was going to attack Anders unless the mage calmed down. Anders sighed as he regained control of himself before grabbing his clothes in a hurry.

"I should be going; I have people who need my help." Anders quickly pulled on his robes and left the giggling Hanged Man with a groan.

"Anders!" Isabela called out, but the embarrassed mage left the tavern in a huff.

The remaining group looked at each other and Fenris realised he was still gripping her hand firmly. Hawke smiled at him, and kissed the lyrium veins on his hand softly. Fenris kissed her forehead, and heard a groan from around the table.

"Enough of the sweet stuff. Give us a sex show the Blooming Rose would be proud of!" Isabela laughed as Hawke rolled her eyes. Fenris growled before Hawke moved and sat herself comfortably in Fenris' lap. His green eyes widened as she settled beneath his chin, ignoring Isabela's cooing at them.

"Maybe later, if he's good." Hawke laughed and Fenris raised an eyebrow at her.

"You are terrible." He sighed, as he wrapped an arm around her waist. Sebastian shivered softly and Fenris sighed.

"Perhaps we should give Sebastian back his clothes?"

"Maybe, or he can work for them," Hawke smiled as the exiled prince skin paled drastically.

"What would I have to do?"

"Well…" Isabela's eyes glinted with mischief before Aveline stopped her.

"How about you ask him anything, and if you're satisfied with his answer, you give him his clothes back?" The Guard sighed as the group seemed to consider before Varric nodded.

"Alright, let's play another game."


"Ok, Hawke, for your left boot. Do an impersonation of a dying Revenant." Varric laughed as their leader stood up from her seat on Fenris. She stood in a clear point of the suite, just by Varric's bedroom and cleared her throat softly. The group watched with glee as she grasped her heart suddenly, looking around the room before falling to her knees with a grunt. She dramatically lifted her head before slinking to the wooden floor with a thud, and lay still for a moment. Varric and Isabela applauded and she stood quickly, bowing lowly.

"Thank you. Thank you, I'll be here all week." Hawke laughed as Isabela tossed her boot over. She grabbed it, and began the seemingly impossible process of balancing on one foot, while trying to put a shoe on. Hawke hopped around the space for a few seconds, ignoring the giggles and pleads for her to fall over, and finally managed to get her shoe on. "Ta Da!"

"You are certainly a piece of work, Hawke," Sebastian chuckled softly as the rogue placed her hands on her hips.

"Did you expect anything else from the mighty Champion of Kirkwall?" Hawke giggled as she returned to her comfortable spot on an amused Fenris. He kissed the side of her head gently as he smiled.

"I am thinking that all this attention is getting to your head, my dear Hawke."

"No Fenris, it's your head that likes my attentions. It gets rather big when I take care of it." Hawke grinned widely as Isabela cackled.

"Did you just make a sex joke?"

"Maybe. Or perhaps my Fenris just has a big head." Hawke pinched the elf's cheeks, ignoring the soft growl she got from him.

"Fine, next hand." A more clothed Aveline muttered, determined to win back her clothes and pride before the night was out.

"I got this." Isabela smirked before looking at Fenris, who smirked.

"I believe not," Fenris felt Hawke giggle on him as they watched the glare from Isabela recede into a dark smile.

"Fine then Fenris. Clothes or Action?"

"Since I only have one item left to reclaim, I shall go for action." Fenris spoke confidently, before witnessing the look she and the dwarf gave each other.

"Alright. Do something dirty to Hawke. Here and now." Isabela laughed.

Fenris glared at the pirate, before looking at Hawke, who was watching him curiously.

"I'm always game, Fenris. It's up to you." Hawke laughed softly and Fenris smiled at her. He suddenly had a variety of ideas coming to him, some of which might fit the description… Fenris sighed and pulled Hawke further up onto his lap, making her gasp in surprise. He bit her back, through her armour and Hawke blushed suddenly. He moved his teeth sharply around before a soft snapping sound was heard. Fenris reached up her back and pulled out her open bra.

"Dirty enough?"

"FENRIS!" Hawke blushed as the table burst out laughing. Varric and Isabela, laughed and applauded loudly, while Aveline and Merrill watched the pair with shock. "You promised you wouldn't do this after last time!" Hawke whined softly and Fenris chuckled darkly, before he kissed her cheek softly.

"Very well, I am sorry." Fenris smiled as he reclaimed his gauntlet.

"Last time? What happened last time?" Aveline wondered and Hawke looked at Fenris, as she bit her lip.

"I don't think we should really say…"

"Oh what could be so bad about it, that you can't tell us?" Sebastian smiled reassuringly before Fenris sighed.

"Last time I did it, we were in the Chantry." Fenris watched as the brother raised an eyebrow at them.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Well… do you know how the end bench at the back of the stairs has been a little sticky for a while?" Hawke sighed as Sebastian nodded.

"Yes…"

"Sorry about that, by the way." Hawke blushed as Sebastian just looked at the pair in shock. Everyone else, however, seemed to find it hilarious.

"You two just can't keep off each other can you?" Aveline laughed as Hawke turned to Fenris.

"Nope, and you can't blame me." Hawke kissed his nose softly and Fenris smiled.

"How about, we finish up here and have little strip wicked grace of our own?" Fenris kissed her jaw with a deep chuckle in his voice.

"Sounds like a good plan to me."

"Oh sweet Maker, just get a room already." Aveline sighed heavily. Fenris raised an eyebrow, before he stood flinging Hawke over his shoulder.

"We shall do just that, goodnight everyone,"

"What about the rest of her clothes?" Merrill blushed as she pointed to Hawke's bra on the table.

"She won't be needing them." Fenris laughed as he closed the door of the tavern behind him.

Varric looked at his shocked and amused friends, as he roughly scribbled a new idea for a story down on some paper before he smiled.

"So… card's anyone?"


Ta Da! Thanks again to EkoCentric for the reviews and all the lovely comments, hope you like this. If not I'm sorry, the Aliens did it.

You know how they are.

Aliens.

And if you would like to hear/read any more of my insane ramblings, please review :3 xx