Alright - the third installment after quite a bit more time than I'd anticipated lol Hopefully it fits well with the other two parts and provides a satisfying conclusion xD

Rating: F for Fluffiness

Disclaimer: I do not own Natsume Yuujincho

Dreamscape

Part III

The night felt dense. Heavy. It had been raining all day, but that hadn't lessened the late summer's heat. The air was thick and damp, and beads of sweat mingled on Natsume's brow with the raindrops. He, Touko-san, and Tanuma all stepped beneath the little awning over the Fujiwara's front door. They were all partially damp despite having two umbrellas between the three of them. The two boys were laden with plastic grocery bags.

Touko-san collapsed her small umbrella and Tanuma did the same. They both propped the damp umbrellas up against the side of the house beneath the cover of the awning and Touko-san led them all inside.

"Tadaima," she called out to the empty house. Shigure-san was still at work and wouldn't be returning until a little later that night, but she still called out the familiar announcement anyway. She ushered both boys into the house before her, taking their grocery bags as she kicked off her shoes. Touko-san smiled at Tanuma as he worked on taking his shoes off as well. "Make yourself at home, Kaname-kun. Dinner should be ready sometime soon."

He nodded and smiled back a little nervously.

Natsume stared after Touko-san as she padded down the hallway with her bare feet. He was almost stunned at how quickly his night had changed because of her. He was both grateful and uneasy about it, though. He stole a tentative glance at Tanuma, who was still overly focused on taking off his shoes.

A little under an hour ago, Touko-san asked Natsume to accompany her to the grocery store to help her bring back the things she needed for that night's dinner. They'd trekked through the muddy streets huddled under Touko-san's small blue umbrella, the heat from the summer and their closely huddled bodies almost uncomfortable. The rain was also warm so even that didn't do much to cool them down.

It wasn't a long walk from the Fujiwara residence to the local market, and once there they didn't have to spend much time finding the ingredients Touko-san wanted for dinner. They were in line to pay when Natsume noticed a familiar outline entering the store.

"Tanuma," the taller boy's name escaped Natsume's lips almost instinctually. He felt his heart pound a little harder in his chest.

Touko-san had heard Natsume and looked towards the store's entrance. "Ah," she called out happily, "Kaname-kun!

Tanuma looked over at the sound of his name. He looked surprised for a second before smiling hesitantly and heading towards Touko-san and Natsume in almost slow motion (at least, that's how Natsume saw it).

"Hello," he greeted, "Buying something for dinner?" Tanuma was carefully avoiding eye-contact with Natsume. He'd been doing this for weeks now after Natsume had been impulsive and kissed the black-haired boy on their camping trip. In fact, Natsume realized, they hadn't been alone together since that night – there had always been someone else present like Taki or Nishimura to act as an inconvenient buffer. Natsume had wanted to talk to Tanuma about that night – apologize at the very least for selfishly acting on an impulse, since it had so clearly made the dark-haired boy uncomfortable – but he hadn't been able to manage it. Tanuma always found some way to avoid being alone together for any longer than a few minutes.

The implied meanings behind the kiss obviously didn't get through as Natsume had intended, thus making the blonde feel even worse about suddenly springing a kiss on his friend. Did Tanuma think it was an accident? Or maybe he thought Natsume was somehow making fun of him, or making light of his feelings? Did Natsume's small action, meant as an encouragement for Tanuma to confess, actually cause the dark haired boy even more pain?

"Yes actually," Touko-san answered. She gestured vaguely to the small basket Natsume was carrying, "We needed a few more ingredients. What about you?"

Tanuma nodded, "I'm looking for something to make for dinner. I usually eat leftovers when my dad isn't home, but – "

Touko-san interrupted him. "You're father's out of town again?" she asked sounding concerned.

"Uh," he fidgeted uncomfortably with the long sleeve of his shirt, "Yeah, it was a last minute trip."

Upon hearing this, Touko-san immediately invited the black-haired boy to come for dinner. "I hate to think you're all alone in that big house – especially on such a bad-tempered night like this one."

Natsume had seen this as a great chance to finally get Tanuma alone long enough to talk with him and added, "And you could spend the night too, if you wanted." Natsume wondered if anyone else heard how shaky his voice had been.

Tanuma's dark blue eyes finally connected with Natsume's light golden ones. He looked a little panicked, a little worried, a little confused. Natsume's chest hurt as he realized he was the reason, once again, for Tanuma's pain.

Touko-san didn't notice any of that though. She just smiled cheerfully and placed one of her small, dainty hands on Tanuma's upper arm. "That sounds like a great idea – please say you'll come, Kaname-kun."

She really hadn't left Tanuma with much of a choice.

"Ah, well, I guess if it's alright with you…" Tanuma answered slowly, keeping his eyes on Touko-san and once again away from Natsume.

The whole walk home had been dense with awkwardness – at least, Natsume and Tanuma seemed to think so. Touko-san didn't notice it, however, so she kept up a polite chain of conversation with Tanuma about his summer break and how school was going now that it started up again.

Natsume decided, mostly out of nervousness and partially out of logical strategy, that he'd save his apology for later that night, after things had hopefully loosened up through dinner. The blonde suddenly called out, "Uh, Touko-san? Would you like any help?"

He could hear the smile in her reply, "That'd be very nice, Takashi-kun – but wouldn't you and Kaname-kun rather do something more fun?"

Natsume glanced at Tanuma and for once, the black-haired boy was looking at him. The small exchange of eye contact didn't last long, but when Tanuma replied to Touko-san that he didn't mind helping out as well, they both seemed to be on the same page.

Both boys headed to the kitchen to help Touko-san with dinner. Mostly she gave them small jobs to do – like peeling a few vegetables, getting out the dinnerware, or making the tea – but even though they didn't feel like they were helping much at all (especially since Natsume was not too skilled with the vegetable peeler, and Tanuma accidentally broke a dish as he was pulling out some of the plates from the back of the cupboard) Touko-san seemed to enjoy their company despite their combined incompetence in the kitchen.

Shigure-san got home about five minutes after everything was ready. He was a little surprised to see that they had company, but he didn't seem to mind. He just greeted Tanuma as if having him over for dinner had been part of the plan all along and went to give Touko-san a small kiss on the top of her head when he thought the boys weren't paying attention.

They quickly settled around the small table to start eating, and of course, as soon as the food started getting passed around, Nyanko-Sensei suddenly materialized. Since in the presence of the Fujiwaras, he was confined to fake meow's and pawing at Touko-san's leg in what he thought was a cute, cat-like way to ask for food. Per usual, she set a small plate of food down on the floor just for the Maneki-Neko, which immediately distracted him.

Much to Natsume's relief, Tanuma didn't seem to be too uncomfortable with the four of them (five if you counted Nyanko-Sensei) all eating together. He hoped he'd be able to gather up the courage and the right words later on that night. A hollow feeling started to spread through the blonde's stomach – one that no amount of Touko-san's great food could cure. He was getting nervous and thoughts of the night out in the forest kept floating to the surface of his mind. One part of that night in particular.

The brief but staying warmth that graced his lips the moment they connected with Tanuma's unsuspecting mouth. The static that seemed to surge through his nervous system. The urgency he'd felt as he gave in to the small, yet impacting impulse.

If anyone noticed that Natsume's face was a little red, no one pointed it out.

The pleasant dinner seemed to pass by all too quickly. Soon all the plates were clean and the glasses were dry. Both boys had helped wash up the dishes. Natsume washed and Tanuma dried. The blonde couldn't help but notice each time his shoulder brushed against Tanuma's or their fingers touched when transferring the dinnerware from one station to the next. He kept wishing that the sense of urgency and boldness that he'd felt on the night of their camping trip would magically come back to him, but the hollow nervousness just kept eating away at his insides. He wanted to look up at Tanuma to see if he could glean any of his thoughts – was he feeling this nervous too? Was he still worried? Was he uncomfortable? – but he found that his eyes couldn't look up into the darkened blue of Tanuma's.

And then Touko-san and Shigure-san said that they were heading in for the night.

But it was still okay, Natsume reasoned with himself, Sensei was still there. He didn't have to bring up that night, or the kiss yet.

Except, Nyanko-Sensei was soon off to go drinking with the lower class Youkai (wasn't he leaving just a little too early?), and the two boys were left alone for the first time since their trip.

They both stood quietly in the hallway at the base of the stairs. Tanuma seemed to be struggling to keep his hands still at his sides while Natsume had his arms crossed over his narrow chest while he fidgeted with the short sleeves of his shirt. All was quiet, save for the rain pattering lightly on the roof and the muffled sounds of the Fujiwaras talking in their room down the hallway.

"Er – I've got some pajamas that should fit you," Natsume offered, considering Tanuma had been invited to stay over without giving him a proper chance to bring any spare clothes.

Tanuma nodded, "Thanks."

Natsume led the way upstairs to his room and quickly found an old shirt of Shigure-san's and some gym shorts with an elastic waistband that would fit the dark-haired boy. He handed them over to Tanuma and quickly left to go get the extra futon and bedding so that Tanuma could change. After taking a little more time than was necessary in order to make sure he didn't walk in on Tanuma while he was changing, he came back up and they set up the extra bed.

With the extra bed made, both boys sat down on their respective futons. Natsume felt an unbearable distance between them, a silence that was dense like wet cement. Their futons in reality were only inches away from each other, but they felt more like islands separated by hundreds of miles of ocean. Natsume sat cross-legged on his own small, rectangular island with his pillow held tightly in his lap as if it were a life preserver.

He clutched the pillow as if it could somehow give him more courage and let out a shaky breath. "Um, there was something –"

But Tanuma suddenly interrupted him, the look of panic once again readable in his eyes, "A-Are you tired?"

The blonde could feel what little confidence he'd had in bringing up the matter of the kiss starting to deflate. "Uhh, kinda but –" Their eyes met again – light gold to dark blue – and Natsume suddenly found himself saying, "Yeah – lets…lets just go to sleep."

Natsume reluctantly got up and turned off the lights. In the darkness he carefully stepped over where Tanuma's futon was and laid down on his own once he got back to it.

"Goodnight," Natsume said quietly. He internally scolded himself for not being strong enough to just say what he wanted to say.

"Night," Tanuma returned just as quietly.

The room was very dark and that combined with the rain outside reminded him of the night he stayed over at Tanuma's – the night he had slipped into Tanuma's dream. Except this time the rain wasn't so heavy and terrible, and this time Natsume doubted that either of the boys would be able to sleep much.

Natsume wondered – and not for the first time since getting that first taste of a kiss from an off-guard Tanuma – what it felt like to kiss someone like Tanuma had kissed the Dream-Natsume. Was it a different kind of feeling than the instant of a kiss he'd sprung onto Tanuma? Or did all kisses feel the same?

He felt his face grow hot as he scolded himself – now was not the time to be thinking about more kisses. Especially since his first one had caused so much turmoil.

Natsume lay on his side, facing Tanuma, who had his back to the blonde. It was dark, so Natsume couldn't see more than a vague outline of the black-haired boy's body beneath the thin sheet he was using for a blanket since it was a warm night despite the rain.

The blonde had been planning all night the words he wanted – needed – to say to Tanuma, and now they were swimming endlessly in his mind. They replayed over and over again, nagging him and taunting him.

How could he be so easily perturbed from his original goal? Hadn't the whole idea of inviting him to stay the night been to finally be alone with him in order to talk about why he did what he did? Where had his determination from a few weeks gone? The urgency?

To distract himself from the words parading themselves through his head, Natsume tried to focus on the sounds of the rain…

Except, he realized that the patters on the roof had gone quiet. The rain had stopped. He turned to face the other way and noticed through the window that the rainclouds were starting to dissipate enough for a few stars to shine through. Natsume could even see a brighter patch of sky where the moon was still hidden behind cloud. He watched slowly as more of the night sky was unveiled by the thick curtains that had burdened the entire day.

Probably an hour – maybe even two – had passed since they'd turned the light out. Now that some moonlight was able to shine through the window, when he turned back to face Tanuma's figure, the blonde could see more detail. The slight hunch of the taller boy's shoulders, the way his hair had gotten a little tangled in the back at the nape of his neck, the small movements of his body as he breathed.

Tanuma was usually a quiet and still sleeper – he rarely ever snored, at least, that Natsume had heard, and he didn't move much once he fell asleep – but tonight he seemed almost completely silent, completely still. Natsume was almost completely sure that the other boy wasn't actually sleeping, but instead pretending.

The wave of courage and confidence Natsume had been holding out for didn't seem like it was going to come.

All Natsume had were the words that he needed to say. The ideas that had been forming in his mind all night. Actually it was more like for the past two weeks. Since his impulsive kiss, more and more things had started to pile up inside of his head.

And he could feel them all weighing on him. Weighing on the dense silence, threatening to break through his lips.

"Tanuma?" Natsume asked in a quiet voice. He thought he saw the other boy flinch from the sudden disturbance of the silence, but it could have been a trick of the murky moonlight. "Tanuma, are you awake?"

There was no sign of movement this time, but that could have been because Tanuma was expecting Natsume to speak more.

Natsume stared at his friend's back and took a deep breath – he would just have to hope that Tanuma was really awake like he thought he was and hope the words came out right. "If you are, please just…listen."

The blonde was so nervous that his hands were shaking as he tucked them tightly against his body beneath the sheet that covered him. "It wasn't an accident…and it wasn't some kind of trick." Natsume's voice was barely a whisper, but it felt very loud in his ears, "It wasn't meant to make you hurt or confused, or to make light of your feelings." He paused, struggling to find the right words to continue.

"You explained how it felt to love someone and…well, it may not feel exactly like how you said but I do feel something – and I know that it will get stronger…I know because already it's grown from what it was a few weeks ago, and…"

The blonde hesitated shortly before continuing. "Well, I'm sorry I acted so impulsively – I was stupid and insensitive – but im not sorry for doing it…I'm not sorry for k-kissing you, Tanuma because I meant it," he finished with a shaky voice, hoping that his words had made sense. He hated the past few weeks that the black-haired boy had been avoiding him. He hated not being able to meet his friend's eye. He hated that the silences between them had grown to be so painful, so heavy.

"Please, Tanuma," Natsume begged in a painful whisper, "If you're awake, please say something…I…I won't try to force you to say something you're not ready to say but…" the blonde's voice suddenly stopped as he saw Tanuma stir lightly beneath his blanket, his head shifting slightly upward.

"So it…" Tanuma's voice suddenly broke the silence that had been building up between them over the past few weeks. He swallowed loudly before continuing, "Are you sure?" he mumbled. Tanuma's words were quiet. "Do you really feel that way? Because I don't want you to force yourself into something just because you're scared of hurting me or telling me no…"

Tanuma's back shook slightly as he spoke those last words.

The blonde felt a small frown toy with the corners of his lips and placed one of his nervous hands against Tanuma's back. He could feel body heat seeping through the thin shirt the dark haired boy had borrowed and his quiet, shaky breaths.

"That's really how I feel…I-I like you Tanuma, as more than a friend. It's not out of pity or anything else like that…I just…you're special to me, and I'm finally understanding why I've always … why you've always felt like more than just a friend." Natsume felt his heart stop in his chest.

There was more to say – but there was always more to say, and at the moment his voice was no longer cooperating with his brain. He hoped that he had made sense with all his stumbling and jumbled words. He let his hand slowly come away from Tanuma's back.

The black-haired boy shifted again, but this time he completely sat up and looked down at his blonde companion with eyes that shone with something Natsume couldn't quite figure out so quickly.

Natsume swallowed a small lump that had started to materialize in his throat, and turned so that he was lying flat on his back, staring up into Tanuma's deep, dark blue eyes. He felt a blush growing on his cheeks from the prolonged eye contact after so long without it.

Tanuma moved, but slowly, hesitantly. His arm closest to the blonde moved and his hand came gently to Natsume's forehead, touching his soft hair and then running his faint fingertips down the side of his face. He cupped the smaller boy's face with such a touch that said he was testing the waters – making sure what he was doing was okay.

Natsume brought a shaking, nervous hand up and placed it over Tanuma's. He lightly gripped the dark-haired boy's hands and dragged his touch to the center of his chest. Natsume still couldn't find his voice, but he wanted Tanuma to feel how fast his heart was racing.

He seemed to understand because Tanuma's face darkened a few shades and that look came back to his eyes – only this time, Natsume was able to identify it. It was similar to the feeling that had surrounded Tanuma in the dream, the moment when he had been approached by the dream-version of Natsume for a kiss.

Attraction. Craving. Desire.

Those three words and more seemed to fit nicely with that look in Tanuma's dark eyes. They looked close to black in the dim moonlight that streamed in from the window. He could see himself in those eyes. Tanuma was suddenly leaning directly over Natsume, breathing quiet and nervously. Natsume's heart had stopped again, but this time the anticipation was somehow a good feeling as opposed to just a few moments before when things were still so uncertain.

Tanuma's mouth opened to say something before quickly closing again, but eventually he managed to ask in a quiet, tender voice, "Can I kiss you?"

"Yes," Natsume whispered back quickly. He felt paralyzed as Tanuma started to lean in again, his face, a few shades darker with a blush, coming closer and closer. Natsume parted his lips slightly, emulating what he'd seen in movies and let his eyes gently come to a close.

The next thing he knew, there was exhilarating warmth spreading throughout his body that had started at his lips. Tanuma had probably been planning on making the kiss light and innocent, but when his lips connected with Natsume's that became more of a suggestion rather than the plan. Their movements were slower, careful, soft, but as they both moved their lips against each others' they felt themselves getting pulled deeper into their own little world.

Natsume's hands had reached up to secure themselves onto the boy leaning possessively over him, his rather delicate hands grabbing fistfuls of Tanuma's borrowed T-shirt and just holding on. Tanuma had kept his hand on Natsume's chest, but it had slid up to the blonde's pale neck at some point and had decided to stay there, running his thumb on the underside of Natsume's chin.

It was so much more than the impulsive kiss had been, and Natsume could feel that there was more that could be pulled out from it – something deeper and more passionate than he could even fathom – but neither of them felt the need to progress the kiss that much. Especially when the gentle warmth this one had created between the two of them was so inviting, so blissful. There was no need.

What they were now, Natsume couldn't even begin to guess, but whatever it was, he was sure that he liked it.

~The End~