Just a short oneshot about how Merlin copes with everything, because I think the show doesn't show enough how everything effects him. I got the idea from the Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode called 'Lie to Me'.

I don't own Merlin

Arthur was heading to see Gaius, hoping that he would be able to provide him with a remedy to soothe his aching muscles after a hard training session. He grimaced slightly as he rubbed his shoulder - while he was there he would yell at Merlin to prepare him a bath as well, he decided. He hadn't seen the idiot since breakfast actually, something which was unusual for Merlin - who he normally couldn't get rid of no matter how hard he tried. And he was not the only one to notice, several of the knights had commented during training about Merlin's absence – normally the servant would sit at the edge of the training field, sometimes completing chores such as mending clothes or fixing armour, other times just enjoying the sunlight as he watched the knights 'roll around the grass like children' was how he had phrased it. Arthur had punched him in the shoulder for that particular remark, reminding him that it was the highest honour to be a knight.

Reaching the physicians chambers Arthur was about to throw open the door and enter, but something stopped him. He could hear the sounds of a muffled conversation coming from within, the tones of which implied it was a personal discussion. Easing himself closer to the slightly ajar door Arthur peered into the room.

Merlin was sitting on the steps leading up to his room, his elbows on his knees as he hunched in on himself. Arthur had took a sharp intake of breathe as he took in his appearance; his eyes were red with dark circles under them, and tears were flowing freely down Merlin's face. Gaius occupied a chair which was positioned to face Merlin, his back facing the door so Arthur could not read his expression. Wiping his eyes with the back of his hand Merlin spoke, and Arthur had to strain his ears to hear:

'Does it...does it ever get easier Gaius? Does life ever get easier?'

It pained Arthur to hear this, Merlin's voice was so small broken, in a way that Arthur had never heard before and never wished to again. But the question itself...how could things be so bad that he would ask a question like that? As he watched he expected Gaius to tell Merlin just that – Gaius would help him, comfort him. He would tell him that everything was fine, and Merlin had just had a rough day.

Instead there was a moment's silence, before Gaius lifted himself from his chair, sighing heavily, 'What do you want me to say to that Merlin?' He rested his hand on Merlin's shoulder for a second before turning away from him, moving to continue work at his desk.

There was another moment of silence, in which Merlin looked at the floor in defeat, and Arthur stood in shock. Were things that bad? Arthur couldn't conceive of what had not only caused Merlin to be in this state – but also for Gaius to be so defeatist about it.

Suddenly Merlin lifted his eyes from the floor, fixing his gaze instead on Gaius as he answered his question.

'Lie to me'

Gaius turned to meet Merlin's gaze, 'What?'

Merlin smiled slightly, a half smile which didn't reach his watery blue eyes, 'Lie to me Gaius. Tell me everything is going to be ok. Tell me life will be easy and everything will fall into place. Tell me no one else will die, and no more mistakes will be made'

Gaius turned back to his work, and for a second Arthur thought he was going to ignore Merlin's strange request completely. But then suddenly Gaius began to speak, not looking away from his work.

'Yes. Everything gets better, get's easier. As you grow up you will be wiser and never make another mistake, and that goes for Arthur and the knights too. Camelot will reach peace with every kingdom without any wars or conflicts. There will be no deaths and no evil, and everyone will be happy. In fact...'

As Gaius continued to talk Arthur watched as Merlin closed his eyes and leaned his head on the wall next to him, finding comfort in Gaius words – finding comfort in the lies where the truth held none. And as he watched his manservant take whatever peace he could get, Arthur resolved that he would make as many of those lies as he could come true. If not for himself and for Camelot - then he would do it for Merlin.

Thank you for reading, I welcome reviews!