I'm trying something a little different with this. Each chapter will be a different mini-story based on prompts. So…tell me about a story I haven't written. I'm open to pretty much anything – any pairings (friend of romantic), missing moments we never saw on the show, AU scenes…anything. I'm going to do my hardest to write something for every prompt I receive, although I have no guarantees on how long each will be – I'm just gonna see where each prompt takes me. So, either PM me or leave a prompt in a review. And please let me know what you think of this chapter! :)

Disclaimer: I don't own Rookie Blue.

Tears from the clouds

Prompt: Sam visiting Jerry's grave alone, inspired by the promo photo from S3 of Sam at the grave - likely from a scene that never made it into the final edit of the show.

Featuring: Sam

Sam walked quickly, with a purpose, over the grass; the ground squishing under each step as the rain that started the day of Jerry's funeral hadn't let up in the week that passed. He looked up at the sky as he slowed his steps near his best friend's grave. He watched the dark clouds rolling by, the dreary weather matching his mood. And while he hadn't been able to release the tears he knew he'd been holding back, apparently, Mother Nature was better at expressing her emotions as the rain fell around him.

He stared at the gravestone, his eyes tracing the etching of Jerry's name, and the dates signifying his birth and death. It was the first time he'd been back since the brief moments after the funeral. And, at that time, there were too many people there - Traci, Oliver, the rest of the rookies...Andy. He couldn't say what he wanted to say in front of them. He pushed out a breath, watching the white puff of air dissipate quickly on the cold day. He didn't even know what he wanted to say.

"Why the hell did you have to go and die?" Sam yelled at Jerry's grave.

Sam shook his head and crouched down so he was eye level with the tombstone. He let his fingers dance lightly over the top of the stone for a moment before balling them into a fist, and he thought about why he was there.

"You're a hero, you know? Finally figured out how to use that stupid phone of yours. Saved Peck. Of all people, a Peck. Her family will probably create a statue of you and we'll have to look at your ugly mug every day." He chuckled. If circumstances had been different, they'd be laughing together about how Superintendent Peck would show her gratitude for saving her daughter.

"You couldn't have found another way to suck up to the boss?" This time his amusement was laced with anger. How could his best friend sacrifice his life, even if it was to protect one of their own. How could he leave him? The people he loved always left; first his dad when he was sent to jail, then his mom who died much too early. He couldn't forget his childhood best friend who died of leukemia before he reached 14. Then there was the woman he dated just out of the academy; just when he thought he was falling in love, she up and left. It was why he closed himself off, why he didn't let many people in. Because when they left, it hurt. And they always left.

It hurt too damn much. "Nearly everyone I love works our job. How do I watch another one of you die? Ollie, Noelle, Frank...Andy. I can't. I'm the reckless one. I'm the one who..." He swallowed the lump in his throat as he thought how he should be the one buried ten feet under. He's the one who took risks time and time again. Jerry was the 'safe' one of the group, becoming a detective, taking himself off the streets. If Jerry could be killed in the line of duty, any of them could. It was a reality that Sam knew was true, but he'd ignored it and kept it hidden in the back of his mind until Jerry died. His death made it real; the fact any of his friends could die anytime they walked out the door of the station.

Sam stood up and pulled the watch Jerry gave him out of his pocket. He watched a raindrop hit the metal backing, sliding over the words etched forever into the gift. "To the good times," Sam mumbled. He shook his head, still looking at the watch. "We were supposed to have a lot more good times."

Jerry was supposed to be there to convince him to tell Andy that he was afraid to fly. He was supposed to be there for the kick-ass bachelor party Sam would have thrown. He was supposed to be there so Sam could see the glow of happiness radiate off of him as he married the love of his life, Traci. He was supposed to be there so Sam could take all his money - again - at the next poker night. He was just supposed to be there.

He slid the watch back into his pocket as he remembered all the good times they had, from the moment they met in the academy to drinks at The Penny two weeks ago.

He didn't want to walk away from the grave, as if doing so meant it was really over. Sam knew standing there wouldn't bring Jerry back, wouldn't allow him to go back in time and do things differently, but there was something final about leaving. This was it, his last goodbye to his best friend. A week later and he still wasn't sure how to say goodbye.

Lost in his own thoughts, the silence of the cemetery was interrupted by the ringing of Sam's phone. He pulled the phone out of his pocket and saw Andy's name on the caller ID. Just as he had done several times over the last week, he ignored the call, letting it go to voicemail yet again. He couldn't talk to her. Not after what happened with Jerry. It was too much.

He couldn't watch the person he loved most die. He wouldn't survive a best friend's death and the death of the woman he loved. So, he'd force himself not to love her. It couldn't be that difficult, right? She probably already hated him after what he'd said and done the night of Jerry's funeral. He'd just keep pushing her away until he didn't love her anymore. Yup, that's what he was going to do.

Little did he know that wasn't possible.

The rain was coming down heavier now, pounding down on his jacket and soaking through his jeans. With a heavy sigh, he turned away from Jerry's grave and headed back to his truck.