As promised … chapter 5. This will be the last. See no need to drag it out and I have a new idea after watching last night's episode. Thanks again for all of the reviews. Please put me on your favorite author list so you can be alerted when I publish my next story!

CHAPTER FIVE

Castle turned around and immediately rushed over to her. He held her as she sank to the floor, dropping the gun, ignoring it as it clanked away from them. They wrapped their arms around each other tightly, desperately needing each other's comfort.

After a few moments, Castle remembered why he had come over to her apartment in the first place. He picked her up and carried her over to the couch, sat her down, and covered her with a blanket. He grabbed the three beers, went into the kitchen, dumped the liquid down the sink, and tossed them into the recycling.

He put the kettle on and waited for the water to boil, watching her the whole time. She didn't move, just stared straight ahead. When the water was ready, he grabbed two mugs, dumped two teabags in them, and walked back over and sat down beside her.

He offered her the mug, but she didn't take it, so he set them both on the end table.

After looking at her for a few moments while she zoned out, he spoke to her.

"Where should we start?"

She shifted over a little to be next to him, which made him feel much better. The old Kate would have tossed his ass out, too, and probably not have talked with him again for days.

"I can't believe I did that," she whispered, laying her head down on his chest as he put his arm around her.

"Did what?" he asked, the scenes from tonight shuffling through his brain.

"Pulled a gun on my ex-boyfriend."

"He didn't leave you much of a choice," he pointed out.

She shook her head. "No, Castle. It's not okay to point a gun at anyone unless you are going to shoot him. What kind of person does that?" she asked him.

"I, for one, was glad you did," he admitted.

She looked up at him. "Are you serious? How can you say that?"

"Because he was hostile. And it was starting to feel threatening. I didn't know what to do. I just froze. But you stopped him. He was being a bully and he needed to leave. I think it was simply the most efficient and time-saving way," he mused.

She cracked a smile then. She couldn't help it.

"While I appreciate the support, you shouldn't be condoning my behavior. I could lose my job for something like that."

"I just wish I would have done something," he sighed.

"I actually think that would have been worse," she told him.

"Worse than you pointing a gun at him?"

"Yeah," she said sarcastically, raising an eyebrow at him, but then her voice turned soft. "I think he wanted a fight. And then I would have had to shoot him for real."

"Are you saying I can't take care of myself? That Josh could take me?" he asked, half worried that she meant it.

The thing is, she kind of did mean it. Castle would fight to the death for her—she knew that. He had already done so. But she had a feeling that Josh would have been very violent with Rick. Not that she ever saw anything like that when they were dating or anything. It was just a feeling.

Josh had always felt threatened by Castle—to see him "get the girl" after his epiphany would have been too much. He had already been acting out of character and the air was so tense, it had felt like he was poised to attack them in some way. In fact, she probably did the right thing by pulling the gun on him. It gave him no choice but to leave them.

She looked up at him with a smile on her face. "I think you could have taken him, but I think it would have been a long time before your face was ruggedly handsome again."

He chuckled and pulled her closer. They didn't speak for a few moments, dreading the other conversation they needed to have. But as always, it was him who started it.

"Why is your dress by the door?" he asked softly.

As soon as the last word was out of his mouth, she shot to the other side of the couch.

"What?" she asked in a chilly tone.

Shocked that she had pulled away from him so fast, he stared at her in disbelief.

"What did I say?" he said, hurt starting to coat his face.

"Please don't ask me that question because you thought you walked in on something," she said, her voice pinched.

He gulped, fumbling out an answer. "No, I … of course not. No …" he sputtered.

"I swear to God, Castle. If you think for one moment that I …"

"I did. I did," he confessed. "For like on second, but then I realized how incredibly unfair and stupid that was."

"I can't believe you even thought that! What did you think? That I agreed to secretly meet Josh here tonight so we could give it another go? Just when all this is happening with us?"

"Of course I don't think that, Kate. It was a reflex. If anything, it was jealousy."

"Jealousy, huh?" Kate started out in a loud voice, but immediately quieted herself and looked away from him. She really couldn't fault him for that.

He watched her wrap the blanket around herself tighter. He saw a little shake in her shoulders and was heartbroken to think he had caused her to cry. He desperately wanted to reach out to her, but gave her the space he thought she needed. He didn't want to push too hard. But when she didn't say anything or even look over at him, he couldn't stay quiet any longer.

"Did you leave because of what my mother said to you?" he whispered.

Her head dropped forward then and she took a couple of deep breaths. She still didn't look at him, but she nodded her head.

"Oh, Kate, I'm so sorry," he apologized, moving over to hug her. She jerked away from his arms, but she let him stay beside her.

"I'm so sorry. That must have been a horrible thing to hear. I swear it isn't true. Mother was just exaggerating," he quickly explained.

"Yeah, but I know you've been with a lot of women … and tonight …"

"I know, I know. It was like a Barbie doll parade. But they weren't all ex-lovers. They weren't even all fans. This is the entertainment business. The women are usually attractive. I know a lot of people. Hell, one of them I saw tonight used to babysit Alexis!" he defended.

"Was that the one who grabbed your ass or slipped her phone number into your pocket?" she said sardonically.

"Hey, wait a minute. You're mad at me for having jumped to conclusions about Josh. Aren't you jumping a little yourself?"

"You didn't have to see a parade of my exes tonight," she reminded him.

"No, I had to see your most recent ex in your apartment, with your dress by the doorway …"

"I only took it off there because I wanted to get as far away from tonight as quickly as possible. I'm sorry if I ruined it. I know it was expensive," she said, already losing her fight.

"It's not about the money," he sighed. "I just wish you wouldn't have left the party without saying something to me first—to anyone. I was so worried and then when I found out what Mother had said to you …"

"It was stupid of me to leave," she said quietly. "I tried to go back in. I really did. But all I would have done was cry and I didn't want to embarrass you at your party."

"You think I care about that? Really? You could have run through the room naked, screaming bloody murder with guns in both hands and you wouldn't embarrass me. I don't care what those people think … I don't care what anyone thinks," he said, taking hold of her hands.

"I didn't want you to see me like that," she explained weakly.

"Then send me a text and tell me to meet you outside. Or tell Mother you were upset and that you were going back to your place. Anything beside just leaving. You really hurt me, Kate," he finished, his hand over his heart.

She tried to apologize, but the words wouldn't come out. He wouldn't understand. He thought everything was fine now, but it wasn't … she wasn't and she might never be. He didn't get it. He didn't understand how vulnerable and exposed she felt now. She didn't want him to see everything yet—she was still a work in progress.

"I don't understand why you still feel like you need to hide from me," he said sadly, sinking into the couch.

Damn him. He did get it.

"Josh is right," she whispered. "I am damaged. I will never be okay. And I'm afraid I will never be the woman you want me to be …"

"You already are, Kate," he said gently.

"That's impossible, Castle. You've seen enough, I guess. But you have to understand that even though you say the sweetest things to me and are so painfully nice to me, I still feel like I can't let you in, or that you will leave one day. I would never want to be with me. How can you stand it?"

"Because I love you," he said.

"Is it really that simple?" she asked, starting to move away from him again.

"It is. It has to be. I just wish you could see what I see," he explained.

"And what is it that you see?" she asked mockingly.

"An amazing woman. An amazing person who has gone through horrible things—things that break most people. And yet you have clawed your way back from every tragedy in your life and now you fight for other people. Most people who went through what you did are not okay. But you are. You may not see it. I try to show you. But you are okay."

The whole time he had been talking, tears had been welling up in her eyes.

"You sound like Dr. Burke," she told him, sniffling.

He sighed then and rubbed his hands together. To her surprise, he stood up then and walked behind the couch.

"I can't believe I am still trying to convince you of how resilient, how determined, how freaking amazing you are …

"I mean, you are so beautiful. When I look at you, my heart nearly breaks because I am so happy you finally chose to let me see you in this way. I can't believe I have kissed you and held you … and touched you …

"But it's so much more than that. More than all the hurt we have caused each other. More than how painful it's been waiting for you, waiting for you to see something I had seen for years."

He paused and put both hands on the back of the couch. He bent over, until his face was against hers. She stiffened, but did not move away.

"Kate, I wouldn't change a thing about you. I wouldn't change a thing about Detective Beckett. Not one thing. I like Beckett and Castle, but I love Rick and Kate. I'm your one-and-done. I know it!"

"How do you know?"

He stood up again and walked further away. He didn't look at her.

"Kate, everything we do together produces something awesome. We are supposed to be together, be a team. There is no doubt in my mind. We are partners in every sense of the word. And I'm sorry, but there is no way I could be around you and not love you. And I know you feel the same. You're scared, but you are sure of how you feel about me, right"

She dropped her head, sighing softly. He was right. Now that they had connected, they would never be apart. It didn't matter what happened. He was right. She was his now. They were each other's. Yeah, she had a shitload of work to do, but she could still love him, right?

"You don't have to be perfect to love me, Kate," he said, reading her mind again. "I'm not perfect, and I love you more than anything. I have waited so long for you."

She watched him come back around and sit beside her on the sofa. He slid one hand up her thigh and rested his hand between her legs. She was kind of shocked, but she said nothing.

"Everything is okay," he promised. "I know we need to talk more … or not, whatever you want, but right now I need to—"

She arched up into him as his body pitched forward and covered hers. Hands were everywhere; mouths ran over any skin they could find.

"Kate, you can love when you're broken. You can heal. We're all a work in progress. Don't you realize I want to help? That I want to be around?"

"Are you a work in progress, too?" she breathed into his ear as he sank down, covering the full length of her body.

"I know one department I'm pretty good in," he whispered, his hands coming up to cover her breasts.

"Yeah," she laughed. "But we should make sure,"

"I agree," he managed between shortened breaths.

"We can stop talking now," she moaned as his knee came up and pressed against that heavenly spot between her legs.

"Just remember … we're doing it backward …"

"Twice," she reminded him.

"Twice."

THE END