For the purposes of this story, the Avengers aren't familiar with the Fantastic Four since the foursome stepped out of the spotlight after Iron Man and a boatload of other superheroes took up residence in the New York area. Reed and Sue did want to raise a family after all. Also, in case you weren't aware, Chris Evans plays both the Human Torch and Captain America in the Marvel movies.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers. Or the Fantastic Four. So don't sue.

"Nooo," Johnny whined without looking up from his X-box. He pushed his thumbs forward and, on screen, his monster truck rolled over a compact car, crushing it flat. "The Avengers are already on it—they don't need us."

Sue shook her head and stared at the ceiling, praying for patience. "They're fighting Doom."

"And it just wouldn't be fair if we ruined their party," Johnny responded, tilting his entire body as his truck screeched around a corner on two wheels.

Sue walked over to the television and poked the power button.

"Hey!" Johnny cried indignantly, glaring at his sister. "I was winning."

"Get your suit on. Now," Sue ordered, crossing her arms and positioning herself in front of the television.

His eyes blazing, Johnny unhappily pulled off his T-shirt and jeans. "It's already on," he snapped.

"Good," Sue responded, grabbing her brother by the bicep and dragging him toward the door. "Let's go."

"Why do people keep bringing Victor back? I mean, it's not like he's a good guy," Johnny complained all the way to the roof where Ben and Reed were standing by the humming Fantasticar.

"We'll meet you there," Ben growled as Sue hopped into the hovercraft and they lifted off, leaving Johnny muttering to himself on the landing pad.

"He's got more lives that a freakin' cat," he groused before summoning his power, feeling the heat burning within him. Then he leapt off the building and allowed himself to be consumed by fire.

Iron Man extended both arms, twin blasts of energy shooting out of his palms. The robot they were aimed at dodged left to avoid the first one and flew straight into the right. It sizzled furiously, its beady eyes rolling around wildly before it exploded.

"Thirty down, about a hundred to go," he quipped into the comm.

"Oh shut up Stark. We all know you'd rather be doing this than sitting in your board meeting," Natasha Romanov shouted into her earpiece as she grabbed a metal arm and ducked under it, coming up directly behind the robot. She aimed her gun at the base of its neck and pulled the trigger, using her other arm to shield her face from shrapnel.

"Touché," Tony replied as he swooped downwards toward a group of the bots rolling along the ground.

Seconds before he was close enough to engage a few of his smaller rockets, a green blur cut in front of Stark, sending him spinning into the air. The Hulk crashed into the ground, picked up two droids and smashed their heads together. Then, he raised the two dangling pieces of metal into the air and roared.

"I thought we worked on your landing, big guy," Tony deadpanned, righting himself and blasting the three remaining bots.

The Hulk swiped half-heartedly at the red and gold suit and roared again before galloping off.

"What's the situation, Legolas?"

"Still coming in from the north en masse. Cap's fighting a hoard on 4th. Thor's tearing through a group of them a block north of Tasha."

"Sir, we have an incoming vehicle to your left," JARVIS intoned in a crisp British accent.

"Friend or foe?"

"Uncertain, sir. I have never seen a vehicle such as this."

Stark spun around, his palms parallel to the ground, and squinted at the oval-shaped craft flying towards them.

"It is human right?" he clarified, his eyes never leaving the UFO.

"There are three beings aboard with unusual readings, sir. I don't know what to make of it. One has a skin most similar to rocks."

As the AI was speaking, a bright orange comet shot past the vehicle. Stark saw a circle of white light disengage and, as it continued to get larger, quickly realized it heading directly towards him. He threw himself to one side as the fireball flew past his shoulder, searing the metal in the process. He heard a sharp crash and saw the flame smash into a robot behind him.

Tony whipped his head around to stare at the blob of fire which was roughly humanoid.

"You're welcome," the fireball shouted, raising his arms above his head and zipping past Iron Man.

"What the hell is that?" he shouted at his AI.

"I do believe that was Johnny Storm, sir."

Stark flipped around and took off after the flaming comet. "Who the hell is that?"

"Also known as the Human Torch. He and three others went into space with Victor von Doom where they collided with a cosmic cloud of unknown origin. They began developing their powers within three days of their return. I was not aware they were still active in the city."

While JARVIS was speaking, pictures flashed on one side of his display: a shot of the X-Games where a rider in full-gear burst into flames, shooting only a short distance before falling flat on his face, coupled with footage of a man engulfed in fire shooting after a silver man on a surfboard.

Tony's jaw fell to his feet, taking his stomach with it as Johnny Storm's passport photo slid onto the screen, accompanied by paparazzi photos of Storm posing with throngs of beautiful women who were hanging onto…well, almost all of him.

"You can't be serious…" he gasped, his mind working in overtime as he stared at the face—saw the blond hair and the impeccable facial structure. New pictures were now flashing on the screen: candid shots of the Torch signing autographs for his younger fans and burning their names into small pieces of wood with one lit finger.

"Yes, sir. These are his most recent photographs."

Stark heard a click and turned his head in time to see the silver craft split into three parts.

"Hello," a soft voice cackled over the comm. "Anyone there?"

"How the hell are you on this frequency?" Tony hissed as he poured on the speed to keep up with Johnny Storm who was diving towards earth while shooting fire out of his fists.

"My name is Reed Richards. I am a member of the Fantastic Four. We are here to offer our assistance."

"We've got this covered, thanks," Stark snapped, pouring on the speed to keep up with the Human Torch. They flew in tandem down a large abandoned street, destroying any robot they came across.

They flew across 4th where an orange, rocky creature was standing back to back with Natasha, roughly throwing robots into walls with such force that their heads snapped off. As Tony watched, a blond woman with absolutely fantastic (no pun intended) curves floated up the side of a building perched on a glimmering disc that vanished the moment she set foot on a rooftop.

"Hi," he heard in the comm. "I'm Sue Storm."

"Clint Barton," the Avengers' resident archer returned.

"Aim at their eyes," she said nonchalantly, flinging her fists open and conjuring what looked like a force field. Two robots crashed into it, their gears grinding to a halt, and fell to earth.

Hawkeye deftly pulled an arrow from his quiver and fired off a shot at a large incoming bot. His arrow thunked directly into its yellow eye and the robot quivered for a second before the lights literally dimmed.

"Thanks for the tip."

Stark scowled at the scene and glanced left in time to see a lanky man reach for a robot that was over six feet away. Tony's eyes widened as the arm kept stretching until the man's hand wrapped around the bot. The over-extended limb quickly snapped back to normal size, pulling the machine with it.

Captain America looked stunned for a split second before bringing his shield down on the robot's head, splitting it in two. He nodded his thanks to the overly flexible man before throwing his shield at another droid.

"Well look at us," Tony muttered under his breath, "our group of misfit toys made some friends."

"Now's not the time for sentimentality Stark!" Barton shouted as he lodged another arrow into a larger robot's neck.

Stark pulled a face but obediently returned to scanning the scene in front of him. "Role call JARVIS," he demanded as he zipped past the orangish fellow.

"That's the Thing," JARVIS began. "Born—"

"Sparknotes, J!"

"Ben Grimm. Marine Corps test pilot. NASA astronaut."

"Thank you. Who's the chick?"

"Sue Richards nee Storm—"

"She's related to the matchstick?"

"Older sister. Married Reed Richards—"

"Stretchy man," Stark clarified seeing his picture on his display.

"Three years ago. Since the Avengers were formed, they've stepped out of the spotlight. The Richards' have one child: Franklin, born last year."

Suddenly the wind picked up, sending Stark and Johnny Storm careening left, and electricity cackled through the air.

"Is that Thor?" someone asked, but Tony couldn't tell who with the wind howling past his face plate.

"I don't know what a Thor is," a boyish voice began somberly, "but that's not him."

The Human Torch halted and pointed upwards at the dark figure that slowly rounded an office skyscraper. Stark squinted—a rather unnecessary action given the face plate protected him from debris—at the man who was wrapped in a green cape, his face hidden behind a metal mask.

"That's Victor von Doom," the Torch said, disgust prevalent in his tone.

"Where?" a deep, gravelly voice questioned.

Someone responded, giving him cross streets but Stark was focused on the hooded man in front of him who was shaking his head and tsk-ing loudly through the earwigs.

"JARVIS, why the hell is everyone able to access our frequency!?" Stark bellowed.

"I am working on it, sir," the AI replied.

"Why Johnny," the masked man said in a metallic voice, "it doesn't sound like you missed me."

He thrust his hands away from his sides, blue electricity flying out of them and crashing into the fireball. Instantly, the flames disappeared and the…kid—sheesh, Stark hadn't realized he was quite that young—plummeted towards earth. The billionaire quickly redirected energy to his leg thrusters and dove after the kid, coming up just beneath him.

Iron Man wavered as Storm crashed into his metal arms but managed to regain his balance once he employed the shoulder stabilizers. The Torch was completely slack in Tony's grip and his lips were tinged an odd shade of blue.

"JOHNNY!" he heard a female shout. Yeah, that was probably Sue.

"He is breathing sir," JARVIS intoned.

"He's alive," Stark notified everyone who was currently able to access their once secure frequency and heard the female Storm exhale in relief.

A blue force field shot through the air and smacked into Victor. "Well hello Sue," he spat, gathering electricity between his hands once again.

A small projectile flew through the sky and affixed itself against what Stark thought was metal armor.

As if Richards had also developed psychic abilities, he answered Stark's unspoken question. "That's not armor. Victor had one of the most serious reactions and developed a metal layer underneath his skin impervious to normal weapons."

"So, that's not his skin?" Barton questioned.

"Correct."

Stark could hear the glee in Barton's voice and knew the archer was reaching for a small button on his bow at this very second. He flipped around so he was covering the male Storm as Hawkeye's arrow exploded.

A mass of blue stretched before him and Stark was now face-to-face with Reed Richards who was reaching out his arms for Johnny.

"Here, I got him," he said. "They could use your suit to destroy Victor for good."

Stark nodded approvingly at the man's appreciation for his creation: truth be told, he liked this guy already. Quickly but carefully, he transferred the unconscious Storm to Richards before flipping vertically and refocusing on Doom.

"Watch out Stark!" he heard and shifted left to avoid the red, white and blue disc that was spinning past. Captain America's shield smacked into the charred von Doom, leaving a sizeable dent.

"Ouch!" the villain shouted sarcastically, using his hands to flatten the groove in his midsection.

He shot electricity out of his hands again, one bolt aimed at Sue and Barton, the other directed at Steve and Richards. Rogers grabbed his shield at the last second and threw it over himself and Reed who in turn stretched to cover the unconscious Torch while, on the other side of the street, Sue threw up a force field and deflected the energy back towards Doom.

Thunder boomed in the distance and Tony glanced upwards to see a red-caped god flying onto the scene. As lightning arced between his hammer and the sky, Thor pulled his arm back, ready to unleash Mjölnir on von Doom.

"Sir," JARVIS interrupted Tony's train of thought, "my analysis indicates that any form of electric charge will only make Victor von Doom more powerful."

"Thor!" Stark hollered into the comms, "Eighty-six the lightning!"

The god pulled back his hammer at the last moment, sending streaks of lightning back into the sky.

"I do not understand why I cannot 'light him up', metal man," Thor demanded, the idiom sounding strange coming out of the Asgardian's mouth.

"It will only make him more powerful," Stark replied, running through lists of weapons in his suit to identify which ones wouldn't transfer power to Doom.

"So brute force, then," Cap decided. "Hulk—"

"Smash!" the green being thundered, shimmying up a nearby skyscraper and throwing himself at Doom. He grabbed the metal head, ready to rip it off, when blue energy sparked all over Doom, loosing the Hulk's grip. Banner's alter ego hurtled toward the ground, swinging himself right at the last moment and crashing through a floor-to-ceiling window to land in an office.

A large rock came flying by Stark and collided with Doom's head.

"Hey Vic!" the Thing shouted. "Come down and play!"

"It would be my pleasure," von Doom announced, angling downwards.

"The last time we faced Victor, Johnny went supernova, heating up the metal before we supercooled it," Richard's voice came over the comm.

Stark heard a sharp slap and winced. "C'mon Johnny!" Richards pleaded.

"Wouldn't a supernova destroy the planet?" Natasha questioned, firing her weapons at von Doom now that he was in range.

"Suzie contained it," The Thing responded before picking up another large boulder and throwing it at Doom.

Stark cocked his head, a thought snapping into his brain. "JARVIS?"

The AI knew what he was planning—after all, Tony had programmed it to anticipate his every move. "I would not advise it, sir."

"But can we do it?"

"We can funnel enough energy into two thrusters to reach that temperature. But unfortunately you won't be able to maintain it for more than twenty seconds at most due to the strain it will put on your reactor."

"Wait!" Reed interrupted. "That actually exists?"

"Not the time, Reed!" Sue shouted, throwing another force field towards Victor in combination with a slew of arrows from Hawkeye that were patterned to exploit typical metal suit weaknesses.

"I will help you, Man of Iron," Thor announced, whipping Mjölnir in a vertical circle as he landed on a balcony next to Tony.

"How 'bout now?" he asked his AI with a smirk.

"You would still need a way to keep it from connecting with Victor," Richards piped up. "Oh, thank God."

"Whazzit," Stark heard vague mumbling over the comms.

"Get your ass up here, Storm!" someone hollered.

From his vantage point, Tony could see the kid stiffen. "You don't get to give me orders," he snapped, rising to his feet with a large wince.

"This month would be good!" Natasha shouted, ratcheting back the slide and dropping the empty magazine from the grip of her weapon. Seamlessly, she shoved in a full magazine and continued firing.

"Johnny do this, Johnny do that," the kid mimicked to no one in particular as he lifted off the ground, flames sputtering. "No 'Johnny, hope you're all right.' Of course not: that'd be too much to hope for."

Hulk and the Thing each grabbed large chunks of concrete and hurled them at Doom. Unable to use his weapons, Stark shrugged and dove forward, punching the distracted villain directly in the face.

"Hey," he snickered as the metal dented viciously. "That was kinda fun."

The shield flew past him again, colliding with what would have been the soft flesh of Doom's throat. Thor swung Mjölnir with deadly accuracy, connecting with Victor's chest, while Hulk and the Thing kept up the barrage of rocks. von Doom lost control and fell a few feet, his breathing ragged over the comm.

"Wait Johnny!" Richards shouted. "I think they have it."

The superheroes kept pounding the metal with shield, hammer and physical strength, driving Doom closer and closer to the ground. A few feet from the pavement, the villain raised one arm, electricity cackling around his fist.

"Nope," the younger Storm began, inhaling deeply and burning white hot. "That's my cue."

"Sue!"

"On it," she responded, jumping off the building, caught by her force field. Stark saw the strain it was putting on her system and flew over, reaching out one arm.

"Thank you," she said politely, sliding between his arm and his chest plate. Careful not to tighten his grip excessively so, Stark dipped and hurtled back towards Victor where a fiery hemisphere surrounded the villain who continued to shoot electricity into the blaze.

Thor threw Mjölnir one last time and it crashed directly into Doom's head, sending the villain crumpling to the ground.

"I like this guy!" Stark heard the male Storm whoop over the intercom between ragged, uneven breaths.

"Just hurry up, Johnny," his sister demanded. Stark set her on the ground and she immediately constructed a force field around the burning dome.

"Keep everyone back!" Richards shouted, glancing upwards at the nearby water tower.

"I see it!" Captain America announced, following Richards' stare. "Hulk! Water tower!"

Natasha was forced to turn her back as the flames turned white hot. From his perch way above the city, Clint found himself doing the same.

A few seconds later, the inferno diminished as the Torch collapsed to the pavement, coughing and panting. Sue contained the remnants for a few seconds more before allowing herself to fall to her knees, blood trickling from her nose.

Steve was about to instruct the Hulk when Tony cut in. "Now Banner!"

The Hulk punched a hole in the spout of the water tower and water raged from the metal cylinder. It landed directly on Doom, sending steam rising in every direction.

"Hey Fabio," The Thing tapped Thor on the shoulder. "Can I get a lift?" he pointed to the water tower.

"Aye, strange orange man," Thor agreed, reaching out his arm and quickly realizing it wouldn't wrap fully around the rocky chest.

"Allow me," Ben looped his arms around Thor's midsection. The god raised his hammer and they flew toward the water tower, where Grimm clamped off the spout when Reed okayed it.

"What are we going to do differently this time?" The Thing asked as von Doom was once again a statuesque piece of metal. But Richards wasn't listening; he ran over to his wife, leaning her head against his shoulder despite her comments that she was fine. A few feet away, her brother picked himself off the ground and limped over to the rest of his team.

The Hulk jumped down from the tower, cracking the pavement beneath him. Screaming, he raised a fist and stepped toward the Victor statue.

"Wait!" Without thinking, Richards stretched forward, placing himself between Doom and the giant green creature. "He was once a human too."

Everyone held their breath as the Hulk locked gazes with the scientist, his face scrunched up in displeasure. Richards gulped noticeably but held his ground, meeting the Hulk's unblinking stare. After a tense minute, Banner's alter ego very slowly lowered his fist.

"I know a few people who would be willing to watch over him," Stark spoke up once he was sure Reed's death was no longer imminent.

"Really?" Richards gasped as he continued to stare warily at the green being in front of him. "Who?"

Iron Man's face split in a knowing smile. "That's classified."

"JARVIS?"

"Dialing Agent Coulson right away, sir."

There was a screech from the far corner and the Hulk started to wither into Banner. The Thing looked on longingly until the green being began to humanify, at which point he turned respectfully away. Natasha pulled a spare set of clothes from her pack and handed them to the naked scientist.

On the other side of the street, Barton winched himself to the ground, coming to a grinding halt as his stare landed on Johnny.

He glanced over at Stark. "Really?"

Iron Man nodded.

"Cap! Get your star-spangled ass over here."

From behind the Fantastic Four, Steve walked towards Tony and Barton. His cowl was slightly askew and there was a deep cut on his cheek that had already begun to heal. "What, Stark?" he asked, exhaustion peeking through his tone.

"Turn around."

Steve rolled his eyes and looked languidly over his shoulder. When he spied the male Storm, his head whipped back around, his jaw slack with disbelief.

Before he could say anything, Thor interrupted. "What madness is this? Why do you wear our Captain's face?" he stalked up to Johnny Storm and poked him in the chest.

"I'm not wearing anyone's face," Johnny complained, rubbing the rapidly bruising spot. "I've had it my whole life."

Steve quietly walked up to him and pressed his hand against the side of Johnny's face.

The younger Storm jumped back quickly, waving his hands wildly in front of him. "Hey Uncle Sam, I don't swing that way."

"He's real," Steve said in surprise.

"Of course I'm real!" Johnny shouted in annoyance.

Carefully Reed helped Sue to her feet. "Can I ask what this is about?"

Stark looked at Steve, tipping his head encouragingly. The soldier sighed and pulled off his cowl.

Johnny's eyes widened as he found himself staring at a mirror image of his own likeness. After a second, he stepped closer and poked Steve's cheek.

"Wow," he muttered, awkwardly patting the captain on the shoulder before hopping backwards and exhaling deeply. "That's weird. In fact, that's downright creepy. Why does he look like me?"

"Technically, you look like him since he's about ninety," Stark cut in.

If it was possible for Johnny's eyes to get wider, they did, while the rest of his face remained impassive. "He looks good for his age," he said levelly.

Steve turned to look at the fully-clothed Banner. "How is this possible?"

"There are many combinations of genes, but at some point, they are bound to repeat. That explains why you can find stunt doubles that look almost the same as the real actor," Banner explained.

He stepped closer to Johnny, looking him up and down. "But a similarity like this, I've never seen anything like it."

Johnny squirmed under the scrutiny and quickly backpedalled away from the prying stare. "Let's just admit it's weird and move on. I don't think my brain can handle any more of this right now."

He turned to Steve, inhaling deeply as he was once again staring at his own face, before speaking. "So what does your team usually do after you win?"

"Eat?" Captain America responded hesitantly, looking around at the others.

"I've got a better idea," Johnny linked his elbow in Steve's and led him away. "Let's get a drink." He paused and took in Rogers' board-like posture and semi-permanent look of confusion. "I take that back: you don't look like you really enjoy the party scene. Buuuuuuutttt, since you're like my clone, I think we can work something out. It'll be like that chick flick Sue made me watch—Love is Stupid or something like that. All I know is it starred Emma Stone and—"

"Who's that?" Stark heard Steve asked before the two travelled out of earshot.

The Thing looked at the genius. "Are you sure they're not related?"

Tony scoffed. "Captain Purity? Not a chance."

A harsh whooping filled the air and a helicraft landed a few feet away. A suited man stepped out, taking in the damage without so much as a scowl.

"We'll take it from here, Stark," Coulson announced, instantaneously commanding control of the scene. He motioned with one hand and a troupe of scientists in full Hazmat gear descended from the helicraft and surrounded von Doom.

"No one's going to fight you for it, Agent," Tony muttered under his breath.

"Have your report on my desk by Monday," Coulson shouted over his shoulder before walking over to join the scientists.

Stark watched them chatter excitedly for another moment before turning back to the rest of the superheroes. "Sooo, that kid had a great idea."

"We know a place," Ben spoke up but paused as he took in the dirty, sweaty group of heroes. They weren't going to make much of an impression if they showed up like this. "Meet you at O'Donnel's Pub in two hours?"

"Sure," Stark agreed. As he powered off the ground, he saw Natasha walk over to Coulson and obtain a vehicle for her, Barton and Banner's transport.

"You know what JARVIS?" he asked his AI as he soared through the air.

"What, sir?"

"This might actually be fun."

Johnny Storm grabbed two tall beers off the counter, smiling deeply at the super attractive bartender. The drinks held high, he slipped between the dancers, spying Reed and Sue shying away from the attention in a back booth sitting across from Natasha Romanov and Clint Barton. At a table not far from them were Ben and Bruce Banner, who appeared to be discussing their physical mutations. Blondie, this god they called Thor, was nowhere to be found, having literally flown off to meet his lady friend in New Mexico, but not before Johnny had tried to lift Mjölnir. The Asgardian hammer had quivered and shaken to the point where it had lifted slightly, but hadn't quite separated from the ground.

"Maybe next time," the god had said, clapping Johnny so hard on the shoulder he had practically fallen.

Maybe next time indeed, he thought. He chugged the foam off his before reaching the table, where he slid the second beer to his new friend.

"So," he began as he sat, "when's your birthday?"

"July 4th," Steve replied, downing half the beer in a large gulp.

Storm nodded appreciatively at the soldier's alcohol tolerance. "No seriously. When's your birthday?"

Rogers paused and wiped foam off his upper lip. "July 4th."

"You would share America's birthday," Johnny snorted.

Rogers shrugged. "Wasn't my decision." He watched Johnny raise two fingers into the air, signaling another round. "You know I can't get drunk right?"

Johnny leaned forward as if sharing a secret. "Neither can I: my body burns through it too fast. But it's fun to sit back, relax, and pretend I'm completely normal."

Steve reclined in his chair, staring curiously at the man in front of him. "So when were you born?"

"April 19th," Johnny replied.

"What year?"

Johnny frowned. "Why do you want—"

"Just answer the question. Please."

"1988, why?"

Steve shook his head in disbelief, blown away by the difference in their birth years while Johnny picked a pretzel out of the bar mix in front of him and popped it into his mouth.

"Sooo, Captain America," he drawled. "Why'd you do it?"

Rogers thought for a long moment before answering, "I don't like bullies."

Storm tilted his head. "So you went through what was most likely a very painful procedure just to take out some bullies?"

Steve nodded.

"Makes perfect sense," Johnny responded dryly.

There was another silence while Steve played with the peanuts in the tray in front of him, separating the broken shells from the whole nuts. "So, the fire…"

"Collision with a cosmic storm," Storm shrugged.

"Why do you do what you do?"

"First we didn't really have a choice, then we all realized we'd might as well use the powers we were given for something…greater."

Then in typical Johnny Storm fashion, he shook his head and picked up his drink.

"But enough with the serious talk. We're celebrating!" he leaned forward and clinked his glass against Steve's.

The awkwardness quickly dissipated in the relaxed atmosphere of O'Donnel's and the two men engaged in light conversation which mostly consisted of Johnny being appalled at how little Steve knew of modern times. After the Torch posed a particularly tough question about the hottest female celebrity, Steve was saved from responding by a scantily clad woman who sashayed seductively up to their table.

"Twins!" she exclaimed, her high-pitched squeal and empty glass a measure of how intoxicated she was. "You know, my sister and me…" she leaned down and whispered into Steve's ear.

The soldier's eyebrows rose into his hairline and his cheeks flushed.

"Ladies, ladies," Storm said, grabbing the woman by her arm and pulling her towards him. "My brother here is happily married," he lied. Steve's face relaxed noticeably and Storm caught the slight nod of appreciation that was sent his way.

He turned his gaze back to the woman and flashed his most winning smile. "Me however, I bet I'm willing to do half the things you just told him."

The woman frowned, then hiccupped. "It's not really a one-on-one thing. One of you's…one of you's…" she paused to collect her thoughts, "'s just not the same." She spun on an incredibly high heel and lurched away.

"Well, that was awkward," Storm deadpanned, grabbing at his glass and taking a long pull.

Steve was still staring with a shell-shocked expression at the woman staggering drunkenly away from them. "I didn't even know most of that was physically possible," he muttered quietly, vigorously scrubbing his eyes with his hands as if to erase the words she had spoken.

"Welcome to the 21st century," Johnny quipped, grinning widely at the bartender who was placing two new beverages on their table.

He drained the remnants of his first beer and handed her the empty glass. "There's just one more thing I gotta know," he waited until Rogers nodded to continue, "are you really like ninety?"

Steve fidgeted in his chair, dropping his gaze to the table top where he traced the wooden rings with his index finger. "Well, technically, but I was comatose for seventy of them, so I'm not sure that actually counts."

"You're old enough to be my grandfather," Johnny returned, the epitome of sensitivity.

Steve just shrugged and took a long swallow of his drink.

"How old do you feel?"

He thought for a long moment before answering, "No one's ever really asked me that. Some days, I feel every day of the ninety, but most days, I feel like I'm twenty-five."

Johnny tilted his head. "So we're basically the same age. Freaky."

Rogers didn't have to respond since Stark bumped into their table, a very full drink in his hand.

"Gentlemen," he waved his glass wildly in the air, sending the top shelf liquor sloshing over the lip. "Are we having fun yet?"

He reached behind him and pulled up a chair, taking a moment to really look at the doppelgangers. Sure it was pretty weird to see two practically identical people born sixty years apart, but there were subtle differences that made them easy to differentiate: Rogers' face had a sharper angle to it, his eyes glinting with the burdens and memories that came with participating in a major war while Storm's face still had that boyish edge, and everything from his hairstyle down to his posture exuded the fact that he didn't appear to have a care in the world. And then there was the hair: Rogers' in its perfect 1940's coif versus Johnny's spiky military cut.

He glanced over at Steve again, noticing for the first time the blush coloring his face. "The lady with the pink corset was over here?" he questioned.

Storm nodded.

Stark took a swig of his drink. "Just forget about it Captain. She's desperate."

"No one should be that desperate," Steve decided, tilting back his glass and draining the entire beer. He placed the glass on the table, not looking the least bit intoxicated.

"He's really no fun to go drinking with," Tony commented to Johnny.

"I see that. Haven't you taught him anything?"

"We tried. He won't have any of it."

The Torch rolled his eyes. "Look. I've known the guy for less than two hours and I got him to wear an outfit that doesn't belong to the khaki or camo family." He nodded sideways at Steve who was dressed in a soft button down, open at the collar—much to his dismay—and black slacks.

Tony nodded his approval. "You need to come around more often."

All three were quiet for a long moment, staring at the people dancing around them.

"You know the media is gonna flip a lid when they see this," Johnny commented.

"Let's hope it doesn't come to that," Tony leaned his head back and drained his glass. "Tell you what: since we're celebrating another successful mission where we successfully defended New York City—yet again—from evil, in the spirit of new friendship, I challenge you, Johnny Storm, to a drinking contest. Winner gets…" he paused for a moment, trying to come up with a prize, "…something cool. Steve, you'll drive me home, right?"

"Always do," the Captain muttered into his glass.

Storm threw back the rest of his beer. "You're on."

Tony pushed back his chair and maneuvered his way toward the bar. From afar, Johnny saw Stark stop by his sister's table and rolled his eyes when he heard the buzzed genius asked Reed if he really could stretch any part of his anatomy.

"You know that's really not fair," Steve spoke up when Tony was out of earshot.

"Tell you what: I'll make a bet for something fun. You'll benefit from it too."

He saw Steve hesitate. "C'mon! I'll stop before he's diagnosed with alcohol poisoning…"

Still no dice. "There has to be something of his you've wanted to try out…"

He'd hit it with that one: a knowing look had quickly flashed across Rogers' face. "Come to think of it, there is this one thing…"

"Gentlemen!" They glanced at Stark who was balancing three drinks in his hands, wobbling already as he avoided collisions with the dancers.

Steve quickly pulled a pen from his pocket and scribbled a few words on a bar napkin. He passed it to Storm who nodded approvingly before clutching the paper in his fist and incinerating it. As the smoke cleared, Johnny brushed the ashes from his palm and held out his right hand. After a split second's hesitation, Rogers reached out and shook the Torch's hand.

"All right," Johnny crooned. "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

The soldier's face lit up, his smile so large it practically split his face in half. "I know that one. That's from Casablanca."

"Ding ding ding," Storm went through the motions of banging on the side of his glass with the back of a spoon. "We have a winner."

The dark-haired inventor finally returned to the table, smacking the glasses against the wood surface. He had even thought to get one for Steve, though he knew the soldier was incapable of intoxication.

Lost in his own thoughts, Captain Rogers was silent while Johnny and Tony discussed the terms of their contest before throwing back the contents of their glasses. He was shocked to realize that, for the first time in a very long time, he didn't completely hate sitting in a crowded pub, surrounded by people he had mostly just met. In fact, he might go so far as to saw he might actually be having…fun.

"You know what?" he spoke up after a long moment, in a delayed response Storm's movie quote. "I think you may be right."

And that concludes our regularly scheduled programming. I hope you had as much fun reading it as I did writing it!

If you're wondering where this story will be stored in the future…crossover stories no longer appear in both fandoms. Since I don't know how many people actually look at the crossover section, I will be categorizing this one-shot as follows: the first week it will be on the Avengers page, the second week on the Fantastic Four page and after that I will permanently move it to the crossover page.

Until the next story,

usa123