Hey guys, thanks so much for reading. The lyrics are in no way owned by me. The artists I used are Marshmallow and Bastille. As well as Billie Eilish. Just a heads up there are a couple sexual scenes...I guess you call them lemons on here. There will be more in the future. If you see START and END in bold and underlined it is showing the start and stop of a sexual scene from now on so you can skip them if you don't prefer them personally. I really really hope you guys are enjoying the story so far. If you are please leave some feedback so I know you're out there :) Chapter Four is almost done and will hopefully be on here in a few days. Thanks again for all your support! I love you guys. 3

CHAPTER 3

11 MONTHS LATER: Sasuke's POV

We're so close. So close to finding her. I can feel it.

I've been a mess this past year. I know I have. But since I've been allowed to venture out of Konoha for missions on my own I've been asking surrounding towns for traces of a pink haired beauty, tracking traces of chakra, anything. Anything to find her.

Naruto, Kakashi, and I have spent every second of our time trying to locate her. As much as Naruto wishes he could be here more, he has to be around for Hinata who had their son Boruto a few months ago. They postponed having their wedding. I know Naruto would never get married without Sakura there.

"We haven't gotten any news recently, which may be a good thing." Says Kakashi with a sigh.

"Why is that?" Naruto asks with a slurred enunciation, the bottle of alcohol in his hand almost empty. He is taking Sakura's disappearance especially hard. Sometimes he's angry. At me...at himself. And sometimes he's just really drunk.

"Because that means she's staying in one place, laying low." He responds, grabbing the bottle out of Naruto's hand. Naruto just grunts and lies on the ground.

"Or it could mean she's dead." He mumbles before settling into a loud snore of sleep.

The thought had crossed my mind. Knowing how strong Sakura is though I doubt it.

She just wants to be away from us. From me.

And you know what? If she wants to hate me fine. But she'll hate me from within the confines of Konoha soon enough.

"Get some rest Sasuke. Hopefully we get some good luck in the morning. I have a good feeling about this one." Kakashi says with a sympathetic pat on my shoulder heading to his tent.

I sigh and lay down on my sleeping bag looking up at that stars through the wind bent trees. I can feel a pain in my chest just thinking about her. The fact that she thinks she needs to be alone. That she's a burden.. Not having her with me, to be able to tell her all the reasons she isn't...it has been a sentence worse than death. I'll never go back on my promise though. I will follow her. I will not let her go.

Please Sakura...let us find you. Let me find you.

Sakura's POV

Hard. That's the word. It's been hard, since I left Konoha. No one to call family. But also no one to lose.

I guess in some ways I got exactly what I wanted. To be away from attachments. But I guess I had grown used to people being there for me again. Just being there, near me, an arm's length away if I needed it. Now that's just a warm and also painful memory.

I finally settled on this big city far enough away that I don't think any ninja would bother coming here to look for me. There weren't many active ninja here at all. Mostly just drunken ninja who had to leave the life. I feel their pain. I pull my black ink stained hair into a braid and grab my guitar. I found a job performing in a bar here and it seems to be going well. People come to see me specifically and I finally have an outlet that lets me let go. It pays the bills and I can relax.

Knowing I have no one to worry about helps.

If they could see me now.

I walk onto the stage giving the crowd what they are yelling for. I start my song with a low breathy voice after sitting on the stool in front strumming my guitar chords.

Thought I found a way

Thought I found a way out

But you never go away

So I guess I gotta stay now

Oh, I hope some day I'll make it out of here

Even if it takes all night or a hundred years

Need a place to hide, but I can't find one near

Wanna feel alive, outside I can't fight my fear

Isn't it lovely? All alone,

Heart made of glass, my mind of stone

Tear me to pieces, skin and bone

Hello, welcome home

Walking out of time

Looking for a better place

Something's on my mind

Always in my head space

But I know someday I'll make it out of here

Even if it takes all night or a hundred years

Need a place to hide, but I can't find one near

Wanna feel alive outside I can't fight my fear

Isn't it lovely? All alone

Heart made of glass, my mind of stone

Tear me to pieces, skin and bone

Hello. Welcome home.

They chant for more and I ignore the aching in my chest that helps me write these songs. I try to steady the shaking in my voice. These songs helped me get through all of these months but they also remind me of who I left behind.

The idea of Sasuke with some other girl moving on without me...it hurts. But it's better that way. I'm too damaged to be what he needs. What anyone needs. Except these people in this big bar. They rely on me to give their bitter drunk hearts something to relate to.

Help, I lost myself again

But I remember you

Don't come back, it won't end well

But I wish you'd tell me too

Our love is six feet under

I can't help but wonder

If our grave was watered by the rain

Would roses bloom?

Could roses bloom

Again

Retrace my lips

Erase your touch

It's all too much for me

Blow away

Like smoke in air

How can you die carelessly?

Our love is six feet under

I can't help but wonder

If our grave was watered by the rain

Would roses bloom?

Could roses bloom?

They're playing our sound

Laying us down tonight

And all of these clouds

Bringing us back to life

But you're cold as a knife

Six feet under

I can't help but wonder

If our grave was watered by the rain

Help, I lost myself again

But I remember you

Then I continue with the most bittersweet memory in my mind.

Lately, I've been, I've been thinking
I want you to be happier, I want you to be happier

When the morning comes
When we see what we've become
In the cold light of day we're a flame in the wind
Not the fire that we've begun
Every argument, every word we can't take back
Cause with the all that has happened
I think that we both know the way that the story ends

Then only for a minute
I want to change my mind
Cause this just don't feel right to me
I want to raise your spirits
I want to see you smile but
Know that means I'll have to leave

Know that means I'll have to leave
Lately, I've been, I've been thinking
I want you to be happier, I want you to be happier

When the evening falls
And I'm left there with my thoughts
And the image of you being with someone else
Well, that's eating me up inside
But we run our course, we pretend that we're okay
Now if we jump together at least we can swim
Far away from the wreck we made

Then only for a minute
I want to change my mind
Cause this just don't feel right to me
I want to raise your spirits
I want to see you smile but
Know that means I'll have to leave

Know that means I'll have to leave
Lately, I've been, I've been thinking
I want you to be happier, I want you to be happier

So I'll go, I'll go
I will go, go, go

Someone brings me a beer and I chug it before diving back into the last song in my small set. Deep breaths Sakura. Remember.

Don't you know I'm no good for you

I've learned to lose you can't afford to

Tore my shirt to stop you bleeding

But nothing ever stops you leaving

Quiet when I'm coming home and I'm on my own

I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that

I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that

Don't you know too much already?

I'll only hurt you if you let me

Call me friend, but keep me closer

And I'll call you when the party's over

But nothing is better, sometimes

Once we've both said our goodbyes

Let's just let it go

Let me let you go

Everyone whoops and claps and when I finally look up I think I'm dreaming.

But I'm not. I see him. Itachi.

The one I've been tracking all these months. After months of circling this area he finally shows himself. He nods toward the door and heads out.

I see a glimpse of something to my right. Bright blonde. Orange. It's hard to miss Naruto in a crowd. He looks at me in a knowing way. I see him next. Sasuke. He's staring at me in disbelief. Kakashi right behind. I know the black hair wouldn't fool them but I thought it would at least be a little less noticeable.

I feel like I could drop to the ground and start crying like a baby to ask for their forgiveness. But I don't deserve it. I look toward the door that Itachi just exited. Sasuke and I just stare. I feel my foot wanting to take a step toward him but the thought of catching Itachi, the person I trained all of my life to kill but failed the first time I tried, is within hands reach. I have to go. I look back at the guys one more time. I give them a small apologetic smile and run after Itachi and away from the people I love most in the world. It's the hardest thing I've ever done.

I track Itachi for days. It's hard to keep up with him but I somehow manage to. I finally stop at a shack. A man I recognize vaguely with white hair stands at the front of the shack.

"Itachi's been waiting for you. He wants to speak." He says bluntly.

"Why do you think I'm here to let you guys live long enough to talk" I seethe.

"Trust me. You want to hear what he has to say." He says opening the door.

The Itachi I'm looking at looks deathly pale with bags under his eyes more noticeable than usual. It looks like he hasn't slept in weeks. He looks like I did two years ago.

I can't bring myself to speak. He has me under a jutsu to keep me in place. He has the power here.

He just stares. It's all I could do to bite my tongue.

"Sakura Haruno"

He doesn't deserve my words.

"You must be wondering why you have been brought here." He states. His face as usual is void of emotion. Except exhaustion. It's like looking at myself before...Sasuke came back.

"Ms. Haruno I need your full cooperation right now. I'm not here to harm you. We each have something the other needs. Will you just sit here and listen?"

Goddamnit why is he so calm? Why can't I be calm like the last time I was near him?

Why?

Then I had been alone. I didn't speak to anyone. I had forgotten what it had felt like to be angry, or sad. I didn't have to worry about the pain my absence would cause. I didn't even let myself feel back then or I would hurt too much.

Since Sasuke came back to Konoha I had been letting myself feel things. For my patients at work, for my friends, for Sasuke. I've almost forgotten the person I used to be. The one who didn't know what to feel. Who refused to. It made killing so much easier. Now I can't even think straight because of my anger towards this one single man.

I nod.

"I need you to know something. I haven't told anyone other than Suigetsu this. It was something that was supposed to be kept out of files. Something that only a few select people were supposed to know. You are now one of those few people. Now you WILL listen. I need your help."

What the fuck is he talking about?

"Do you know what the term coup d'état means Sakura?"

"The overthrow of a government.. "

"Yes. If you could think of the most closed off, disclosed place in Konoha when you were a child, what would it be?" He asks. He's searching my recognition, or something.

"The Uchiha Estate. It had those big stone walls and everyone was scared to go near it." I state quietly.

Oh. Ohh.

"You guys...were you guys?" I can't even finish my sentence. I'm starting to feel sick.

"The Uchiha family was planning to overthrow the Konoha government and to take control of the village as their own. Fugaku put me in charge of keeping tabs on the Hokage and the elders though he never told me why. The elders had knowledge of the coup because I told them once I found out. They had told me to spy on my father and when the time came Danzo ordered me to kill them without the Hokage's knowledge of any of this going on. The information my father had bottled up in the manor was becoming too powerful. He knew too much." He pauses.

"There was nothing I could do to stop it. I loved my village. I would die for it.. I would kill for its safety. The only thing I fought for was the life of my brother. I would only accept their request if I would be allowed to spare Sasuke's life."

Holy fuck.

"I need you to know, I only did what I did because I wanted to keep my brother and the village I loved and grew up in safe. I've hated myself ever since. I can't sleep. I can barely eat. I needed you to know because I've recently found out that you've become Sasuke's closest friend. I need you to tell him of the wrongdoings of Danzo and get him out of Konoha for the good of the people. I don't want him to be able to force this kind of execution on anyone else. Long have I gone with my only family wanting to destroy me. Sasuke needs to know this, and I need your help. I want him to live a normal life of a ninja. And someday I hope to be able to call Konoha my home again." He looks so fucking sad.

Wait one fucking second.

"Do you mind explaining to me how my family got wrapped up into all this bullshit? My little sister!?"I seethe.

"You didn't really give me a chance to explain that far. Somehow your parents knew about the overthrow. Nobody had a clue how they found out. The idea was that your father did surgery one day on my father's heart and while he was in recovery under the numbing drugs he must've said something. I don't know how they found out that your parents knew but they didn't let me bargain on your behalf. They told me you had too much clout and potential in the village. Too many people knew you on a personal level and thought you to be somebody to be of power in the future. And your sister well...They didn't care to put it ever so bluntly. But you need to know something."

What do I say to all this shit? What could I possibly say? The elder that everyone in the village looks up to is a liar and a horrid man. If what Itachi was saying is true. Something about it seemed real. It makes sense.

"If you have any decency you'll tell me whatever the fuck else I need to know. Now." Is all I can muster.

"I've recently retrieved some files from an old worker of Orochimaru. He had created a jutsu...That's another reason why I retrieved you. Orochimaru figured out that a user with Sharingan can reach into a person's memories, and choose the being they want to reanimate. Now this is the point where I offer my services to you, so I can in some way atone for the sins toward you. There's a definite risk of death, and if not your own death, a complete loss of chakra, or no effect at all. You can only do it once. Otherwise you will die indefinitely. It was all experimental but then he did it with Kabuto." He states That explains how Kabuto has survived this long.

Oh my god. I could bring back Saru. I could bring her back. I know if my parents had a choice they would want me to choose her.

"There is one catch though.."

"The risk of death isn't enough?" I joke darkly.

"You have to get the deceased body and bring it to me for the jutsu to work. It's the process of reanimating the body to the form it was last seen in your memory. The body will match that memory."

He's serious. About all of this. The sadness in his eyes proves it.

"I need to think. Please let me go outside." I plead. He obliges.

I walk out of the small shack. The air outside is chilly, causing goose bumps throughout my whole body. The depths of the winter season once again upon me. It doesn't feel like its been almost a year since I left. I'm almost twenty five. Twenty five and still alone.

If I have the chance to bring Saru back..I will do anything. Even if it means digging her from her grave. The idea is sickening but I will do it.

And I do.

When I go back in I recruit Suigetsu's help and I tell Itachi that we will meet him back here in two days.

I don't want anyone to know that we are in the village so I use my invisibility jutsu on both me and Suigestsu. We dig up Saru's little casket then refill it with the dirt.

I learn on the way back to the shack with Suigetsu that he joined Itachi because Itachi saved him from getting killed. But other than that we didn't say much to each other.

When we get back Itachi starts going over the process with me.

"It can take a few days to recover her soul as it was. In that time it might be in your best interest to go home and rest up and maybe talk to Sasuke. If you guys are as close as I've seen, then he might want to be involved in such an important event in your life." He reports. It's almost like the bastard is chastising me.

"I haven't seen Sasuke in almost a year. I doubt he'll even listen to me" I say.

"Just the same, you were the closest person to him. There is something else...the former Akatsuki...word still gets to me. There are plans for an attack on the five nations. One of the newest members, Kabuto, has been slowly poisoning cities and villages. Draining their chakra. Kabuto is hoping to take over without a fight. He along with a few past living and reanimated Akatsuki members plan to destroy everyone that doesn't take them as their leaders. They have tens of thousands ready to fight in a few weeks. I need you to get this information to Tsunade. Preparations need to be made."

I feel sick. All of this information and now war?

I for some odd reason trust him. Danzo has always been creepy as fuck. I never really believed that he had the village's best interests at heart. How on earth can I explain all of this to Tsunade? We'd have to go to court, give Danzo a trial. He's so old, but he can still do harm. Especially if we need to have people in charge that we can trust going forward into battle.

As much as I want to stay, I don't want to see what Itachi has to do to make this happen. I needed to get this information to Tsunade as soon as possible.

The process had taken a lot out of me. He had me in his Sharingan so he could see my thoughts of Saru. He made sure that I didn't see anything bad. When we came out of it, all my chakra was drained and I was exhausted. Luckily Suigetsu is helping me get home to Konoha.

As we get to the gates we're stopped by the guards just so they can catch up with me as the frisk us.

I tell the guards that I'd make sure to tell Tsunade of his presence which is what I go to do. He even carries me on his back to her office. I'm so tired. It's eight in the morning which is an hour after she comes in every morning.

"COME IN" Comes the exasperated yell I've come to know and miss from my mentor. She must've been out drinking last night.

"Oh my god. Oh my god Sakura. Please tell me that's really you!" Tsunade says running up to me grabbing me in a big hug.

"I'm sorry I didn't send any messages Tsunade-sama. Something crucial came up. You need to be informed immediately. This is Suigetsu. He helped me travel home from where I have been for the past few days"

"Few days!? How about you tell me where you've been for the past eleven months!?" She says rightfully angry.

"I can fill you in on the details later. This is important Nade or I wouldn't have come back." I say pleading with her with my eyes.

"Alright. Continue Sakura." She says seriously sitting in her chair.

"Itachi Uchiha is alive." I go on to explain what had happened. The paper trace of evidence of something wrong going on in the Uchiha Compound came through to me the day Sasuke had to sit in my office with me. She goes to retrieve them from my files and brought them back into her office to trace them with me. She sees rifts in the information that I didn't even understand myself.

She wears the same look of horror I did that day in the office. That day Sasuke offered to spar.

We sit in silence. This might have been one of the only times I have ever seen my mentor cry. It is anger and betrayal. I understand it well.

I have to then explain to her what Itachi is doing for me right this second. She sits in silence and astonishment once again.

"Sakura..what you two are doing..you're manipulating time. That's very dangerous. No wonder you're exhausted." She states.

"Now Suigetsu, I gather that you're a friend of ours?" She asked

"I have done nothing against your village, no." He informs her.

"He's helped me. He's been with Itachi." I let her know.

"Do you have a village that you live in right now?"

"No ma'am."

"Would you like to live here?"

"Would you allow that of me?" He asks incredulously.

"Well, we'd have to do some paperwork, and you'd have to take some exams if you'd like to be a shinobi for our village, but it shouldn't be too much of a problem."

"Well thank you ma'am. It's been provided to my knowledge that an old teammate of mine has been staying here. If alright, I'd like to go stay with him. Juugo his name is. That is, if there is a village still to live in soon." He says.

"Oh that big lug! Yes, he's been helping me with some research. He has a house down by Ichiraku. Wait...what do you mean a village still? Sakura?" She asks looking to me.

And now it's us. I tell her what Itachi said to me about the possible incoming war. She doesn't seem surprised but she does seem frightened. She's never dealt with this before.

"Sakura dear, what if something goes wrong with a Jutsu like this? One wrong move and Itachi might possibly take the memory of your sister from you forever. You could die. So many different things could happen to you. Are you willing to take that risk?

"I want my sister back. I will do whatever it takes. Danzo made Itachi kill her. That was not supposed to be her destiny or fate or whatever you want to call it. We need to let the villagers know of his wrongdoings, and put him up for a public trial." I say with venom in my voice.

"You're right. I will hurry with that. Your next mission is to bring Itachi Uchiha and your sister back, in one piece, alive. Hopefully I can count on you for this fight as well. This is your home. Is that understood?" She says, back in her Hokage voice.

"Yes."

"Sakura...I don't know what happened to make you leave. But are you finally coming home?" She asks me with hope in her eyes.

"If I bring Saru back I will. If not...I left for a reason. I'd really have to think about it..." I say to her grimly. She nods her head sadly.

"Go tell Sasuke. He deserves that at least." She says walking me out of the hospital.

"I let him stay at your house even though he's off probation. He's been working on building the compound. They had left looking for you again but they got back in last night." She says and I get an annoying nervous flutter in my stomach.

I walk up the hill to my house but I see he's not there. Next door I see the start of a building. In the middle pounding on some wood with a hammer is Sasuke. I stand at the sidewalk frozen into that spot. I know the minute I see his face that I might crumble.

He looks up and stops short seeing me standing there. I give him a small smile, it being all I can muster through my nervousness. My black hair is whipping around in the wind.

He sighs a deep sigh only the likes of an Uchiha can make. Deep and desperate.

Slowly he walks to toward me. Gauging my reaction. Like I might bite him. He's close enough to kiss me, or hit me. Instead he just slides his hand behind my neck, putting his forehead against mine. He then pulls me in the tightest hug I've ever gotten. I want to stay like this forever but it's not what I'm here for

"Sasuke. I need to tell you something" I say quietly. He closes his eyes pulling away from me.

So I tell him. About the war. About his brother.

"You're lying. You're still holding a grudge against me and you're trying to get back at me. No. You're a liar. Get out of my house. GET OUT!"

Even as I run I can't believe what I heard from the man who once told me he loved me.

"Sasuke, I'm not, it's not what you're-I would never..."

"You wanted me to let you go right? That's what you said in your song. Yeah, we heard your whole goddamn show. Well I'm giving you exactly what you want, Sakura. I'm letting you go! NOW GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. GET OUT AND DON'T COME BACK"

"S-S-Sasuke"

He's angry to say the least. I'd never seen him so animated before. I was back to being a stuttering fool.

I run. He just needs time. I'd come back with Saru and he would understand. He would.

I run where I haven't gone since it happened

Our house.

Weeds are all over. The paint is chipping and the door looks like it had the last time I had been there when Itachi struck.

The anger I feel toward Danzo is indescribable.

My little sister was murdered, simply because there was the possibility that she had heard my parents talking about the overthrow.

They never deserved this fate. She didn't.

Konoha had respected my wishes to keep the house the way it was. After it happened I told Naruto to make sure they left the house alone. He did. I heard about him fighting people off the property for months. He did it because I asked.

He was just good like that. He is always a bright light when all I see is pitch black.

I can never figure out if I love...loved Naruto, deep down, like I love Sasuke. He was just so special to me that if he would've asked me to be his that night in bed with him, that I might've said yes just to make him happy. But he didn't. If I had said something in those years before Hinata being in the picture... maybe in the early years in their relationship as bad of a person I am for thinking it... we might have been together right now. I might have been normal.

It's selfish to think that. Naruto and Hinata are going to be happy. Another reason I need to stay out of everyone's lives. Stay away. It's just better for everyone.

As I walk through the living room I feel like I'm re-living that night. I can see my parents.

It's like they're at an arm's reach.

"FUCK." I scream in the middle of this torture chamber of a house.

I decide to move forward. I start to grab our pictures off the wall. Dishes from the cabinets. Saru didn't need to see this. This was something I should have done a long time ago. I needed to get the stuff from her room if she was coming back to me. I box them up. Her clothes, her toys, her blankets, even her curtains. I want it to be somewhat normal for her when she comes home.

My room is next.

It's like living in a dream. Untouched and covered in dust. My old training clothes. Clothes I wore on the missions. My stuffed animals. The pictures of team seven. I can fit them into two boxes. My blanket is red with the Haruno symbol on it. I would never leave that behind. Then there were headbands Ino gave me years and years ago. Memories that I had completely forgotten. Blocked out of my mind. Important memories. Memories of things that made me, me.

I feel myself holding my breath as I walk through the doors to my parents' bedroom.

Naruto had been here at one time or another. I could tell. He cleaned up the blood, tidied things up. It's like he knew I'd be back eventually. Sasuke and Naruto, they'll always know me better than anyone else.

I put my parent's clothes and favorite things in boxes. My father's large sweaters and flannels were something I'd probably wear. I put his favorite Christmas sweater on then, it goes past my butt and the sleeves are about 6 inches longer than my arms.

I can still smell my father's cologne on the sweater. It makes me cry instantly. The ugly kind of crying that steals your breath and makes sounds that a human shouldn't ever have to make. Saru and I used to sit on his lap on the porch until we fell asleep, our noses buried in his chest, inhaling his cologne.

I can't do this. I'm starting to shake, uncontrollably. All I want is Sasuke here with me, and he's done with me. Hell I'm done with me. It makes me cry harder. So I sit there on my knees holding myself, back to square one, with no one. Just like I wanted. Right.

"Sakura"

That humiliating feeling is back. Making me feel like he thirteen year old pain in the ass that I've alwas been.

"Go away Naruto." He's always around when I need it most but can't handle it. The good. Even after I left. Again. He's still here.

"You know I can't do that."

"You should. This isn't something you need to concern yourself with anymore." I say between my disgusting sniffles.

"I was just at Sasuke's. He just told me what was going on. Or rather I forced it out of him. He was crying. You know the bastard doesn't cry. He feels terrible for the way he treated you. But think of how scared he must be." He tells me sitting next to me against my parent's bed. He knows the exact way my mind works, we've worked together so long that half of the time we could finish each other's sentences.

"You didn't hear him. It was like we were kids again Naruto.." Sniffle.

"Sakura, he's hurt. He was betrayed into thinking his own brother fucked him over. Pretty much his whole life was flipped over with a few sentences from you. Not to mention you left us. Again. He's spent basically the past year tracking you. He's hurting."

He's right. He's always so right. Everyone used to call him an idiot, but he is the most intelligent person I know.

"You're always here when I need you. Whenever I have needed you in the past. I can't say that about anyone else… why did I let you go?" I divert my gaze from him, I don't deserve to look at such a beautiful person.

I was stupid in the past. I pushed away anyone that gave a shit about me. And of course I did it with Sasuke. I ran.

"You didn't. We're still here. Together. You'll always be mine in my heart Sakura but I have to tuck that away now. I love Hinata and we have a family. You know I'll always be yours first…but I can't keep chasing you. I have to be here. So you have a choice Sakura. One you've been pushing away for a very long time. And just think about the possibilities if you make the right one." He says standing up. "Please come home." As he leans over and with a kiss to my head he's gone.

Sasuke's POV:

Well I'm fucking pathetic. I just ruined the one shot I had to talk Sakura into coming back. I had a whole speech ready about how I need her with me. That I want nothing more than to have her in my arms again. So much for that.

Everything in my life is a fucking lie. All the anger I have ever felt for Itachi, is nothing near what I'm feeling right now toward Danzo.

My mother, she never agreed with what my father would do, but it's not like she could say anything when my father was so powerful. She didn't deserve to die. Sakura's parents didn't deserve to die when her father was just helping my dad in surgery.

THIS IS ALL JUST FUCKED UP.

Itachi. Sakura's going back to get Saru and Itachi to bring them back, that's what she had said. I'm in front of her empty house, no sign of Sakura. She must have left already. Naruto is meeting me at the gates. I asked him to go see Itachi with me. "This is the last time Sasuke. I promised Hinata. I can't do this anymore. I need to be around for Boruto." He had told me. "I can't give up on her, Naruto. She never gave up on me while I was gone. Neither did you. I have to apologize. I have to get her back" I say and he had nodded.

"You ready?" He asks as we meet up.

"mhmm" I mumble.

The trip is long, past Suna a ways. We have to stop and let Naruto sleep at one point. The coordinates are difficult at first to pinpoint but we soon come to a shack. The windows are completely lit up with the use of chakra.

"NOW SAKURA. DO IT NOW!" I hear a frantic Itachi. A sound that you don't hear too often in a lifetime.

As we burst in, the sight is disturbing.

Itachi has his hands around little redheaded Saru. Sakura is there, sweat running down her face. She has a tube running into her wrist, transporting her blood into the small body. She's pumping what seems to be an exponential amount of chakra into the child's small chest. Sakura's eyes are dull, with dark purple circles under them, paler than usual skin surrounding it. Unhealthy, death like skin.

"Sasuke." I hear Itachi say in a commanding voice towards me.

"We need yours and Naruto's chakra. Sakura can't go any longer and we're about to lose the girl. Suigetsu is in Suna getting supplies. He was our back up. NOW BOYS." He barks.

Surprisingly I spring to action, responding to Itachi's demand like when we were kids.

"Sakura, you have to stop. Sakura, you HAVE to stop or you'll lose consciousness." He tells her.

She hasn't been listening to well to him I could tell.

"Naruto, take the tube out from her arm. We have enough blood from her to disperse around Saru's body. We're almost there. Now both of you start pumping your chakra into her chest. Pump your hands against it just a little. Right. There we go; I'm starting to get a faint pulse!" He exclaims.

I've never seen Itachi like this. Hopeful. He was usually so deflated because of our father.

After 5 more minutes of this, we all start to feel the beat of the small child's heart.

"Don't stop Sasuke. Naruto, you can go sit down, you're starting to shake, we don't want any visitors in you come out, no matter how much you want to help. It will destroy the process."

"Sasuke, if you can't go on, I can start on the that part of the proce-

"I'm fine"

"Sasuke, you're getting very pale" That comes from an exhausted Naruto, who lay next to a practically unconscious Sakura on the floor.

I will finish this for her.

Right as I start to feel my body become numb Itachi relaxes from what I can feel.

"She's alive." He's exhausted himself.

The little girl lay on the table breathing deep breaths of sleep.

"Sakur-!"

Sakura is unconscious. I can't feel a sign of chakra. Or a heartbeat.

I start to shake. "ITACHI" I don't even try to hide the desperation in my voice either. Not my Sakura.

We both have to focus our chakra into pumping air into her lungs, or heart, or whatever the fuck the point of this pumping is for before we get the slightest hint of a pulse.

I sit holding her as her deep breathing returns slowly. Naruto had passed out from exhaustion himself.

Itachi sits on a chair in the room. He is watching me watch Sakura's face. I don't want to risk the chance of her heart stopping again.

"I've never seen someone give up their whole being for another, all that they were, more than that girl." I hear come from him.

"That's Sakura." Is all I can get out before falling asleep to the sight of her face.

Sakura's POV:

I open my eyes to darkness. I take a sniff, which is my first step to gathering my surroundings while my vision is impaired. I smell Sasuke. A distinct smell that I would find myself missing while away.

I jump slightly looking up at his face. He looks down at me. He doesn't say anything though. No smile, no frown, just unspoken thoughts.

Then he hugs my face close to his chest once again.

He's walking. Through the forest. Naruto is there, I can sense it. Itachi. Anyone can sense the strength of his chakra. Suigetsu. Then I sense a small amount of chakra, that of a child.

"Saru!" I jump slightly, looking around. "She's fine, she hasn't woken up." I hear up ahead from Itachi. He is holding my very alive sister. I try to get out of Sasuke's grasp with what little strength I have but he won't let me down.

"It would be impossible for you to walk even if you tried. You have no chakra in you. Even after a two days trip of walking. We're almost home." Sasuke notifies me. So many questions surround me. I'm too tired to voice them. I just let my eyes droop back down into the safety of Sasuke's arms.

When I finally wake again I'm in the hospital that I've grown so attached to over the years. The patients. My colleagues. I'm not fond of how weak I am in this bed though. It feels like I had fallen off a cliff. My neck hurts.

I try to call out for someone but my voice is gone. I can't even move my hand.

After sitting there staring at the wall my first visitor comes in. To my surprise it's Hinata.

"Oh. You're awake! I'm so sorry. I w-was just doing rounds as a volunteer since we're short staffed" She says visibly nervous.

And visibly not pregnant.

She comes to sit in the chair next to my hospital bed.

"Can you say anything? They say your vocal chords had been strained...while you were down something happened to you causing you to be upright and alert but still asleep. There were a lot of screams...and your neck...the reason for the bandages...you we're clawing at your neck causing wounds. I'm so sorry. This must be a lot to hear." She says without a single stutter. She has gotten so much better.

"I know this is not a good time. B-but I feel like I need you to hear this and if you could speak I might not have the courage to say it...just please stay here. Please don't leave again. Naruto can't help h-himself. He will always go after you and I could never expect anything other than that from him. It's what makes him so special. But we have a baby boy and he needs his father. So I'm asking you, n-n-no matter what happens that you will stay, as a f-favor to me. I've put up with a lot over the years. Naruto being consumed by worry for you. You still being in love with him after we got together. It was obvious but I knew you were there first and I'll never fault you or him for it. But I have to ask it of you...as a favor to your best friend...to me and...Boruto. Let him be happy." She says eyes red with the possibility of incoming tears.

It stings. But I need to hear it. It takes all my strength to shake my head up and down a couple times. She puts her hand around mine and squeezes. "Thank you, Sakura. I'm going to let Tsunade know you're awake." She says and with that she's gone.

I stare out the window. She said something happened to me while I was asleep. I have the faintest memory of pain. Excruciating pain. And screaming until my throat felt like it had fire in it. But the cause remains unknown to me.

In bursts Tsunade followed by Naruto.

Both of them are their normal exclamatory selves. I try to seem happy about their presence but all I feel is anxiousness. I need to see Saru.

I put my hand on Naruto's chest to stop his rant about how happy he was to have me back, please don't leave again, we need to take a trip to Ichiraku. Promises that I have to keep this time around.

"Saru..." I say with a very very hoarse whisper. Their faces fall and I know something is wrong.

"Sakura...while you were asleep, something happened. We aren't sure what, with this being a jutsu that's never really been performed before. Your chakra...it doesn't seem to be coming back to you as fast as normal. That's why you feel the way you feel right now. And Saru...we have her on life support. We've kept her on it for the week you've been out. We wanted to give you the chance to say your goodbyes. Once she is taken off the support machines, she will no longer be alive." Tsunade says softly, holding my hand in hers.

I feel numb. All of that work, just for a goodbye. I failed. Again. Saru...

"Please...get...out" I say carefully.

"Sakur-" Naruto says gently.

"Please!" I say, using all of the little energy I have to yell in desperation. I just need to be alone.

I can't stop the sobs from taking over my entire body. I turn onto my side, facing away from the door towards the wall holding onto myself tightly as I let the grief I feel overtake me. It feels like I will never stop crying again. Not even a year and a half ago I didn't feel anything other than anger.

I think hours pass by. I hear a soft creak of the door as someone walks in. I feel humiliated at the fact that I cannot push the sobs away as they come closer. I feel them climb into bed and lay down against my back. I feel strong arms wrap around my body and I feel his chakra. Sasuke. It makes me cry harder.

"I'm so...so-so-sorry" I wretch out. Sasuke just holds me tighter. "We'll get through this. Just stay with me and I promise we will get you through this." He whispers into my ear. I nod. Soon enough my sobs start to subside.

He helps me face him in the bed. I catch my breath. Seeing him again, with love in his eyes after everything that had happened. What he told me at the gates of Konoha a year ago...he had meant every word. I finally believe him.

"I talked to Itachi. If it wasn't for you hearing him out, he would still be out there alone after everything he's been through. I could have helped you, but still. Thank you Sakura and I'm so sorry for how I spoke to you and for everything that has happened." He says pressing his forehead against mine.

"I fucked up. Never again" I say. Seeing how much pain I caused...I would never do that again. It's like a switch had flipped in me, maybe the whole not having chakra thing. But I was ready to stop running. I was ready to be home.

"I know." He says brushing my bangs out of my face. It looks like the black dye had been washed out by the nurses.

"I don't know how to say goodbye to her. She was my future. In my head I made all these plans." My face contorts back into a crinkled up sob.

"I know baby." He says, pulling my face into his chest bringing me in closer yet being careful not to hurt my body. He starts to run his fingers through my hair and it does truly help ease some of my tension.

After I calm down Sasuke helps me out of bed. He carries me carefully into Saru's hospital room. Tsunade, Shizune, Naruto, Kakashi, and Ino are all outside waiting for me. For moral support I'm sure. They all give me sympathetic smiles. Kakashi pats my shoulder as Sasuke and I walk in. Sometimes it's still nice to get encouragement from your Sensei.

Sasuke puts me down in front of her bed and I instantly tear up. My little sister lies there still almost five years old. Just how I remembered her. I bring my hand up to rest on her pale cheek. The breathing machine beeps slowly as it pumps air. I know the sound well. It's the sound of incoming death.

"What do I do Sasuke? What do I do? " I say as he wraps his hand around mine.

"You do what you never got to do before. You say goodbye and let her go, so you can both be at peace." He says and I immediately know he's right.

"Saru sweetie. It's Sakura. I hope you can forgive me. I tried. I really did. I put you through so much just to fail. But I know you can be happy with Mommy and Dad. I just...I needed to see you. I needed to say goodbye. I love you so much and I wished so much more for you. But you can go be happy. I'll try to as well. I promise." I say and with one more squeeze of her hand I back away from the hospital bed against the wall.

Sasuke gives my hand another squeeze as Tsunade comes in to take Saru off of life support. I watch as her breathing stops and her heartbeat turns into a flat continuous tone. They say they can make arrangements for a funeral tomorrow and the thought makes me nauseous.

Tsunade meets us out in the hallway.

"We'll take care of everything tomorrow. I just want you to go home and rest. Sasuke knows the warning signs if something is wrong with you. That is if you plan on staying" She says.

I walk up to her and do something I had never done with her. I hug her

"I won't leave." I say. I believe it. "Oh Sakura...thank you." She says hugging me back.

Everyone pats my shoulder as Sasuke walks me back to my room. He pulls clean clothes for me out of a duffel bag he must have packed. Out comes a pair of leggings...and my dads oversized sweater. The caring thought Sasuke put into this makes me start to cry again.

"I'm so sorry Sakura. I didn't mean to upset you." He says looking flustered.

"Its okay...it's just that this was my dad's favorite sweater. It makes me remember him...and I think that it's okay now." I say with a small smile, inhaling his scent.

"Can you help me into these? I can barely move. It's okay if you see. But...if you could look up until the tank top is on that's fine too" I say with a blush.

"O-of course." He says looking up as he pulls the hospital gown off my shoulder and helps me bring the tank top over my head. When he helps pull my arms through I get goose bumps from the feeling of his hands on my skin.

I start to get squeamish as he pulls underwear out of the bag. He leans over and helps my feet through the holes and I stand on the ground as he starts to pull them up. He seems very intent on the ceiling as he pulls them all the way up. I don't think I could be this embarrassed and awkward. But it's definitely possible. He pulls my leggings up and helps pull the sweater over my head. He pulls my hair out of the sweater but keeps his hands on my shoulders. Before I know it he pulls me into a hug. "I'm so glad you're home." He whispers.

Me too.

Sasuke's POV:

Saru's funeral was rough on Sakura, I could tell. During the service I kept seeing her looking at the tree line. I could see she wanted to run away but for some reason this time she stayed. Something about her is different but I can't figure out what it is.

When we get home though I figure it out. Sakura starts deep cleaning the apartment and doesn't stop cleaning for three days. I don't know what to do other than to start helping her on the third day. Her body can't feel good and a few times it seems as though she gets dizzy but she just keeps going.

"Sakura.." I say sitting next to her on the floor of the kitchen as she scrubs the bottom cabinets. She jolts, almost like she isn't even here. "What?" She says looking toward me.

"You're supposed to be resting." I say quietly.

"Either I'd be running away to somewhere else or training until I can't feel anymore. But I can't do either of those things without chakra. I just lost my sister again, the city is worried about incoming war, Danzo has his trial by death soon and I need to do something!" She says angrily standing up slowly. I follow her up.

I get in closer to where she stands facing the sink my mouth inches away from her ear.

"There is one thing we don't need chakra for..." I gently kiss her neck. "That could take your mind off of everything.." I gain all my courage and bite her earlobe softly. I just want to make her happy or at the very least feel...pleasure. She tilts her head slightly, a sign that she's enjoying my actions. I turn her around so she's facing me. "If you're interested…" I say looking down at her. She seems deep in thought.

"Sasuke…I'm not good for you. I've loved having you stay with me here. Especially now that you're not obligated to." She says looking like she might cry.

"Sakura, god. I'm not good for you! But I'm going to do everything I can to be what you need. My life was terrible without you in it. You don't even see what you do to me do you? I'm so freakin madly in love with you that I can't even think straight. If I can get past our dark shit we've dealt with I hope you can too because I can't handle being away from you. Ever again." I say passionately.

She looks stunned and that's when I kiss her. Hard and deep with every fiber of my being. It causes a moan to come from her. I take that as a sign to continue and pick her up to set her on the kitchen counter, not breaking our kiss once.

START

I reach around to her tank top straps, giving them a little tug, to gauge her reaction. She doesn't say anything though her breathing quickens.

I take that as a good sign so I slowly pull the tank top down, off of her arms, instead of up.

As I pull it down, exposing the skin of her stomach and back, I bend down, trailing kisses down her side as I pull the tank top down then back up, kissing the bruises on her torso. She kicks it to the side. With this kiss I know tonight is the night. She's fire in my mouth.

She pulls my t-shirt up and off of my arms and I pick her up as she wraps her legs around me and I start to guide us down the hallway, having to stop against the wall to get another taste of her mouth. This time her tongue works its way into my mouth and I look down at her bare breasts and can feel heat gather in my groin pushing against her leg earning a moan from her mouth. "Sasuke..." The sound alone, my god.

I drop her slowly onto the stairs and tease her through her leggings. A moan escapes her mouth and I smirk. I slowly sneak my hand under her waistband watching her eyes for any sign of discomfort. Instead I see a blushing, disheveled Sakura with her head tilted back.

I dip a finger into the heat between her legs and watch her body arch slightly. Soon enough after exploring I find a spot that produces a loud "Sasuke!". I continue rubbing my fingers against that spot and I almost drool at the sight of her trying to grab the railing to steady her body. I explore a little bit more and find the area I can dip my fingers into. I slowly put two fingers in and I get a low breathless moan from Sakura which makes me pick up my pace a little more and more. At one point she looks like she might explode when I take my hand out.

She opens her eyes and watches my every move as I slowly reach my hand up to my mouth and lick the dripping moisture from my fingers. I see a hunger in her eyes I've never seen. I crash my lips against hers and pick her up and she wraps her legs around my waist again never parting from my mouth. I carry us up the rest of the stairs.

We finally crash into the bedroom and onto the bed. Sakura lying against the headboard. I nip at her neck causing small moans to break out of her mouth.

I take my pants off quickly leaving me in my boxers, now concentrating on her difficult leggings. Eventually I get them off, rubbing my hands on her thighs, then grabbing onto her ass, bringing her closer to my body. My groin starts to passively rub against her underwear. That breaks a surprised moan from my woman as I start to feel moisture coming through the dainty cloth.

I kiss my way up her stomach to the top of her breast causing her to arch her back closer to me.

I can't help but stare. Sakura tries to cover her breasts with her arms but I pin them down at her wrists causing her to whine.

"Stop staring!" She says as I look up at her finally.

"Shutup Sakura. You're absolutely perfect."

I play with her right breast with my hand then switch to having my mouth on her right breast. Her nipples are small and hard, cute. She has her hands grasping my hair. When I finally take my mouth off of her she somehow flips us over to straddle my waist.

The pressure on my dick is too much. I can't keep in a loud groan, causing her to smirk. She softly kisses my lips then starts to move her face down near my crotch.

Slowly she pulls off my boxers, staring at me. This must've been what she felt like having me stare at her breasts.

Then I see her ever so slightly bite her lip. It drives me crazy.

"Can I touch it?" She asks looking up at me. I just nod knowing we are both fairly new to this. At least I had never... I don't know how the procedure for these kinds of things work. She's the first woman I have ever kissed. The only one I ever plan on kissing.

She grazes her fingers up and down it, lightly touching the tip. That earns her a little bit of my liquid to drip out.

Then she does something really fucking surprising.

She licks the drop of liquid right off my dick. Holy shit. The feeling of her tongue drove me crazy. "Sakura! Fuck."

She smiles. And then she starts sucking on the tip of my dick. Oh my god.

I think I just almost growled. This woman is something else.

I can't help but thrust my hips farther into her mouth, my dick hitting the back of her throat. I have to stop this before I explode.

I pull her head up by her cheek bringing her face to mine for a kiss.

"Did I do it wrong?" She asks, a worried look in her eyes.

"No. It was too good." I say as I flip her back under me, pulling her down so her legs dangle off the edge of the bed making her giggle. The sound makes me so happy.

I of course had to return the favor.

"ahh..please.." I make agile work with my tongue. Her juices are enticing and I try to take care of every last drop.

"More."

"Sasuke Please.."

"Please what, Sakura?" I ask. Her naked body my god. Her lips are swollen and her cheeks are red. It is the hottest thing I have ever witnessed.

"I need you…now, please." She says quietly.

"Are you positive?" I ask jokingly.

"Oh shutup and do it goddammit!" She exclaims earning a laugh from me.

I bring my face up to hers, smiling, earning one in exchange.

"It'll probably hurt for a sec." I say getting worried.

"I know."

"You sure?" I ask just to make sure she's ready.

"Shutup Sasuke" She says with a smile.

Legs spread and arms around my neck she readies herself for my entrance.

Slowly I press into her, stretching her. I keep watching her face scrunch up with discomfort but no pain. I hear her groan loudly in pain at one point but she tries to stay relaxed for me, her tightness wrapped around me.

I cannot explain how good my body feels right then. She shifts and then nods, opening her eyes and looking up to me.

Slowly I started to shift my hips forward in a steady rhythm. Then I hear her whisper in my ear. "Faster".

She doesn't have to ask me twice and it's then I hit a spot with my momentum that makes her moan my name the loudest all night.

"SASUKE"

"fuck…fuck,fuck,fuck. Yes Sasuke…"

The bed frame starts to shake, hitting the wall with every thrust. Now I can't even contain my groans.

"Fuck Sakura.."

She starts to dig her nails into my ass bringing me even deeper into her.

I feel a tightening feeling between the ecstasy. She starts to constrict harder around me, her moans getting louder.

"Sasuke, I'm..holy fuck I'm.."

"Me too. Fuck. Sakura.."

My thrusts are becoming more erratic hitting that spot for her every time. I feel myself falling over the edge as I bury my face into her neck.

Thrusting harder, I explode as I feel her constrict around me and her juices flow down my shaft. I keep pumping slow and hard, riding out the wave as our moans mix. I'm seeing actual stars.

"Sasuke.." She calls out as her body goes limp against the mattress. I kiss her looking into her jade eyes and feel sleep start to overtake us. I don't pull out as I turn us over so she's lying on top of me. The connection is something I don't want to end as we fall asleep together.

END

When I wake up Sakura's not in bed with me. I feel a second of panic and I jolt upright. I calm down when I see her balcony doors open knowing where she is. I put my boxers on and walk out into the cold temperature. I climb up and see her quickly wipe at her face. I feel dread at the thought that I might have hurt her, mentally or physically. The thought makes me want to vomit.

"Did I do something Sakura? If I did I'm so sorry just remember I'm a guy and were complete idiots. Just tell me so I can fix it." I ramble as I lean in front of her on the roof.

"No...it's not you. It's me." She sniffles. I grab her hands. "Tell me what's wrong, maybe I can help" I plead with my eyes. Please don't shut down on me.

"It's just...I love you, Sasuke. I love you so much it hurts. I never stopped for a second. And I have been fighting it for eleven years. And tonight…it was the best night of my life. I let go and just let myself love you and it was amazing. But Sasuke, it's also the scariest thing I have ever encountered. It feels like a dream, like if I wake up this will all vanish and I'll be back to being my fucked up self. What if I lose you after all of this? What if something happens to you on a mission? What if you change your mind about me. I'm terrified of what loving you means. It means I have someone to lose and every fucking bone in my body has been trained to run away from...that. Like right now I want to run into those woods so fucking badly. But I'm here. And somehow this is scarier." She shivers when a breeze rolls through and takes a deep breath. She won't look at me so I put my hand under her chin steering it toward me.

"For what it's worth…I will never ever leave you Sakura. You are everything to me. Don't you see that? You have no idea how terrified I was while you were gone not knowing if you were okay. Not being able to protect you. You are my best friend. My family. I can't lose you... This bubble we get in when were together… it's a good thing. As much as it seems foreign and makes you want to run for the hills. Trust me, I feel the same sometimes. After everything we've been through...the fact that we're still in one piece is pretty impressive. We just have to trust each other. Have each other's backs." I say looking her straight in the eyes with a small smile. She starts to blush and her eyes dry up.

I smile real big right then.

"What?" She says considering how out of place the smile is for the conversation.

"You love me." I say. I can't stop smiling.

"Out of all this…I swear." She laughs blushing even harder.

I lie back on the roof and pull her on top of me. "You love me".

"Well yeah. I said tha-" I cut her off with a kiss and feel her smile against it.

The rest of the night is amazing. We sit and talk about our families, what had happened with us while she was gone. How she loves performing surprisingly. I tell her everything.

I tell her what it was like to be with Orochimaru and how I felt so power driven that I started to believe Orochimaru's evil words about Sakura, Naruto, and Konoha. When Sakura listens she really sits there and listens. One of the many things that makes her special.

"Sometimes when I was being punished by Orochimaru I'd remember..that night in the forest during the chunin exams. Before you were really developed as a Kunoichi and I was such a dick to you. But when I was down, you were there taking the blow for me. That's when I knew you weren't just a petty girl with petty problems and wants. You were a ninja, and you would risk your life for your teammates. That's when I thought I needed to leave, so I couldn't think about how much I cared about you. But when I'd be whipped or whatever type of torture he deemed necessary for me, I'd think of you standing in front of me. Protecting me. Not that I'd ever want you even within a mile distance from him, but the thought always pulled me through..."

It's the most I've ever said of that time of my life and it's nice to talk about it while my head lies on Sakura's thigh as she runs her fingers through my hair.

This is what it feels like. Like what Naruto said. That feeling. Sakura is mine, my goddamn soul mate.

Please don't ruin this Sasuke. Please.

Sakura's POV

I needed girl talk. Stat. I never thought I'd say that but I need to talk to Ino. I leave a sleeping Sasuke a note that I would be back soon. I find Ino and Shikamaru at the flower shop. Ino lights up with a smile when she sees me

"SAKURA!" She yells running at me. I flinch a little bit considering I pushed it too hard too soon last night. But god was it worth it

"Hi Ino...I was wondering If I could talk to you about...guy stuff." I say.

"I knew you would come to me someday about this stuff. "SHIKAMARU WE'RE GOING TO THE CAFE COVER THE COUNTER PLEASE LOVE YOU BYE." She yells toward the back.

She practically drags me toward the café, buys us coffee and makes me sit at a little table at the window with her.

"So spill. Obviously something happened with you and Sasuke because you're blushing up a storm and I need the deets." She says.

"Well...when you and Shikamaru got more...serious, did he ask you to be his girlfriend or..?" I mutter out nervously.

"We'll Shikamaru is so lazy that I just went HEY are we exclusive now? And he goes yep." She says with a ridiculous blissful gleam in her eye. "Why, did Sasuke ask you to be his girlfriend!?" She asks practically shaking me.

"Well...no. But he's told me on two occasions that he loves me. And last night we-" I'm cut off by Ino's screech.

"You and Sasuke had sex!? Oh my god Sakura you dirty dog!" She says making me cower my face behind my hands.

"Ino shhh I don't need the whole town to know about it!" I say.

"Oh forehead don't worry. Oh my god though. So you guys are dooooooin it. Was it good?" She asks causing me to get extremely flustered.

"It was fantastic but Ino he didn't say anything about where we stand and we stayed up all night talking so he had chances and now I don't know what to say to him." I say partially regretting even coming to Ino. So damn loud.

"Sakura...Sasuke literally only ever had eyes for you. Everyone at school used to see him catching looks at you when you weren't looking. That why I couldn't stand you. Because I knew. But look at all that Sasuke has done to keep you in his life. A guy like that is not looking to mess around. He's a long haul kind of guy. Just wait...you'll see" She says with a smile.

We sit and chat about life for a good hour until she looks at the clock and jolts upright. "I have to get back! We have a huge order coming in." She says with a hug rushing back toward the shop. "I'm so glad you're back Sakura!" She yells turning around to head back. I smile back and wave.

I spend the rest of the day walking through town. Those eleven months were the longest I had ever been away from Konoha. As the sun starts to set I stop back in the flower shop to pick up flowers to take to the cemetery. I get hydrangeas, Saru's favorite. It's just getting dark as I walk in. Through the dark I see a tall figure at Saru's grave.

"Here I thought coming at night would give me a little more privacy." I say to Itachi.

"Looks like we both had the same thoughts...I'm very sorry for your loss. I was here for the funeral, just not seen." He says with a sigh.

"We did everything we could. Thanks to you I got another chance at a goodbye. For that I'm forever grateful." I say.

"Danzo's trial is soon...what conclusion do you think they will come to?" He asks. He sounds so tired.

"I spoke with Tsunade. They will sentence him to death." I offer this information to him with a small smile. "At least justice will be served for once." I say.

"Well... I'll leave you be. Tell Sasuke hello for me." He says heading toward the entrance.

"You know...Sasuke is my family. Which means so are you Itachi. Come over for dinner Friday? Let us get to know you." I say hopeful.

"I...would like that very much." He says with a small smile.

"Perfect. I'm on top of the big hill. I'm the only house up there...Sasuke has started building the foundation for his new home next door so you'll know where we are. Be there at six!" I say with a smile.

"Thank you...I will be there." He says leaving me alone with Saru. I sit down and lean my head against her beautiful gravestone.

"Well, this is me trying Saru. How's it look so far?"

I spend a few more hours in town. I even buy a chair. A dark maroon velvet...decorative...chair. A needless piece of furniture. But I like it and so I buy it. It's a weird but good feeling. Caring about getting things to make my apartment more...human.

I get back to the house around seven pm. I open the door and drag the chair through and I'm hit by a delicious smell.

I walk in and set the chair at the end of the coffee table and look up to see Sasuke standing in the kitchen...with an apron on. "Hi..." I say with speculation that I try my hardest to hide from my voice.

"Hey! So we left off in a weird spot last night." He says as he brings over a pan of steaming steaks and baked potatoes to the table.

"Yeah... about that. Sasu-" I try to say nervously wringing my shirt in my hands.

"Just wait. We skipped steps. I know that. We're not exactly a normal couple. Last night...I just wanted to make you feel good. Happy maybe? So I did it a little backwards but would you like to go on a date with me?" He says with hopeful eyes gesturing to my dinner table dressed in a white table cloth with my dinner plates covered in delicious food with 2 candles set between the two place settings. My table is big so he put a chair at the end and right next to it on the corner. Intimate. Adorable.

"You did all this...for me?" I ask

"No, the other pink haired woman I'm in love with behind you." He says as he pulls out the corner chair for me, and I sit laughing.

"Dig in" He says and we start eating. He pours me a glass of red wine and one for himself.

We eat and chat a little between our bites.

"You bought a chair." He says smiling.

"Yeah...I guess it's finally time to decorate this place."

He's quiet but is smiling to himself. He turns a little more toward me.

"So, I need to make something very clear going forward and knowing you, you might not have gotten the hint last night." He grabs my hands with his.

"I know I've said I love you, and I tried my best to show it. But I just really want to make it clear that I can't share you. Not that you're an object to be shared! Fuck. What I'm trying to say is I want you to be mine and mine only. Girlfriend. Whatever they call it. And let me be really clear when I say this too." He rambles but stops with a confident edge to his voice.

"I just want you to know that this is so much more than that. That I plan on you being so much more than that." He says looking me straight in the eyes.

Did he just imply what I think he's implying? Holy shit. He definitely is. The way he's looking at me isn't just the look of a man looking at his girlfriend.

I'm blushing so hard now that I feel like I might pee. My body is on fire. Sasuke's basically saying he wants us to get married someday.

He brings his face close to mine. "You in there S-A-K-U-R-A?" He says playfully but also searching my face for answers.

"Okay." I say with a small smile. Not knowing how to respond to that as significantly as I would like. This is all new territory to me.

"Good" He whispers. He gently pulls me toward him until I'm forced to spread my legs apart and sit on his lap. He rubs a thumb on my cheek and drags it down to my bottom lip.

I don't feel like my old self with him anymore. I feel new. Confident. Good.

START

I can't take it. I crash my lips against him, tangling my hands in his hair. He practically lets out a growl as he pulls my body down harder against his. I feel him between my legs and I can't help but moan. It's like last night ignited a fire in us that is just too big to put out.

I muster all of my courage and grind myself against him all the while not letting our mouths drift away from each other.

"Holy shit Sakura." He says smiling in disbelief at me. Both breathing hard I know what I need and I need it now.

I graze my hand down to what I'm looking for so desperately. I quickly unzip his pants. He watches my face in concentration then starts pulling his shirt off as well as mine, immediately taking one nipple into his mouth with the other accompanied by his hand.

"Ahhhh. Sasuke!" I moan out.

I have to interrupt him to pull my pants off. I take a deep look at his hard erection and almost drool at the sight. Instead I position myself on top of it. Sasuke looks at me with a hunger I know I want to see again. We kiss as I slowly slide down. We both moan in tandem as I reach the bottom.

The feeling of being in control is something I can get addicted too. I start dropping down harder. Sasuke buries his face into my neck groaning louder as I start to pump fast and hard. "Fuuuuck Sakura. Don't stop." He moans against my breasts.

"Ohhh Sasuke." I groan out. He grabs hold of my hips and takes charge slamming me down as he jolts his hips upward into me. The feeling, my god. "OHHH. Sasuke!" I practically scream at the feeling of him so deep..

"Sakura fuck. Holy shit. You're so damn tight. Feels..so..fucking good." He groans out. I bite his bottom lip as our pace speeds up with need. "Keep going Sasuke. I need to...ohh!" I can't help but moan out. "Come on me Sakura. Let it go." He whispers, biting my ear. He starts pumping into me faster until I can't hold it in any longer.

"SASUKE OHHHHHH." I groan out as I feel myself dripping onto his dick.

"Good. But we're not done yet." He says smiling at me. I shiver at his response to my climax. He stands us up and turns me around, his arousal pressing against my ass. His left hand starts to massage my breast as he slowly trails his right hand down my body until he reaches the very wet area that elicits a low moan out of me. He jolts us forward bending my body onto the table, causing a few things to crash to the ground. His right hand never leaves my arousal as he leans forward against my back pressing into me from behind. He sets a pace in rhythm with his hand which is rubbing my clit back and forth. I can't even try to hold my voice in. "SASUKE. PLEASE DONT STOP. OH MY GOD."

He picks up the pace, shaking the table.

"Holy hell Sakura, you're amazing." He breathes out as I constrict myself around him harder. I can tell he's getting close with his thrusts becoming more erratic. He was close before my last climax but I know he's trying to please me first before himself. It's thoughtful as hell. I can feel mine building up as well and I squeeze tight around him. "Sakura...I need to.." He growls out. "Me too, harder!" I say and he does just that.

All I can see are stars in my eyes as he rubs my clit faster all the while giving me just what I needed. "Sakura come for me...fuck FUCK!" He groans as I moan the loudest I have in the past two days. I have never felt something this good in my life. I might become addicted to sex with Sasuke. My whole body is buzzing in the afterglow as Sasuke takes a deep breath as he drops his mouth onto my shoulder. "Fuck..." He groans pulling out of me, helping me upright. He laughs and I realize it's because the whole front of my body is red. "Oh fuck off." I laugh and he kisses me deeply, lifting me off the ground.

END

He grabs his boxers and puts them on grabbing his t-shirt throwing it over my head. It goes all the way to the middle of my thighs. I inhale looking up at him. His gaze is something I still have to get used to. I wrap my arms around his waist, embracing him in a way I've never done with anyone before. All I feel is love.

So fucking weird.

He picks me up and drops me on the counter. "What'll it be, grilled cheese, or a burger?"

"Oh grilled cheese, definitely." I say crossing my legs.

I watch him putz around the kitchen making food for us and can't help but smile. Having someone take care of me is so nice. I never realized how lonely I was until Sasuke came back to us. "What are we gonna do…it sounds like we're going to war." I say.

He sighs and turns towards me. He brings his face up to mine and puts an arm on the counter by my sides. He kisses me. "We'll figure it out. Look at who all we've got our side." He smiles and turns back to his pan.

When the sandwiches are done he hops up on the counter with me and we dig in. I hadn't realized how long we had been at it until I had felt my stomach growl. "I can't let anything happen to you." I say. He looks at me with the look specially reserved for me. "I can't let anything happen to you." He says nudging my shoulder with his. "I guess we need to pack in all the fun times while we can huh?" He says with a smile.

We spend the night talking. We have a movie going but pay it no mind. I'd be lying if I said we didn't have sex again. We had gooood sex. Not to mention the morning sex. I honestly feel like an animal has been un-caged in me. I can't help it.

"I guess we need to pack in all the fun times while we can huh?"

We didn't get enough time. If I had only known what was in store for all of us.

Three weeks later

Sakura's POV

We've made so much progress on the Uchiha district with the help of our friends that I'm a little uneasy. Not too long from now Sasuke's going to leave me. Seeing the walls actually going up and the house actually starting to look like a house is amazing though. Helping Sasuke with it has been fun. After we had that first dinner with Itachi he had offered to help as well joining in with help from all of our friends. So much progress has been made. Little does Itachi know that Sasuke does indeed have plans for a smaller house not too far to side to be made for Itachi. They've bonded and it's nice to see. I love seeing Sasuke smile so freely. It's a blessing that I feel privileged to witness.

We have a meeting at the tower today with Tsunade and the rest of the leaders of the village to make a plan. We decide to hop in the shower together in the name of practicality. At least that's what we tell ourselves. We tell it to ourselves as Sasuke has me pressed against the shower wall as he ravages my wet body. He doesn't make love to me right now. He fucks me until I'm basically screaming under the scalding water. When we get out he pampers me. He dries me off and puts lotion on my legs and arms for me. One of the most relaxing things I've had done to me ever. I still feel scared to get used to this. The more I dive in the harder it is to breathe without him.

We stop at Ichiraku to grab some food before the meeting. Naruto of course is there with Hinata and Kakashi as well.

"HEY GUYS." He yells at us excitedly as we walk up. Hinata smiles nervously at me. I give her a genuine warm one in return. She gave me the kick I needed and I'm grateful.

"So…how's your little guy?" I ask. "Oh Boruto is fantastic Sakura! In fact if you guys would like to, you could come over for dinner! We can make it a double date with a plus one, HAHA. He misses his auntie and uncle!" We get our food and chow down briefing with Kakashi about what he thinks will happen. We all head over to the tower and wait for Tsunade.

I'm jittery being around people, still easing into it, but Sasuke puts his hand on the small of my back to calm me down as we're leaned against the wall to be discreet. I'm grateful for him immensely. Tsunade walks up with a solemn look and leads us to the large conference room. I take my normal seat next to her and drag Sasuke next to me. Naruto and Kakashi across from us. The rest of the anbu and rookie nine take their spots in the room. Tsunade sighs deeply.

"To start off, Danzo's time of death was eight am this morning. It had been extended for reasons that I will keep within the leaders of the village. It was death by poison. Any questions?" No one speaks.

In walks Itachi. "Ah yes, the next issue. I have reinstated Itachi Uchiha as a member of this village. He is now also a member of Anbu. Sasuke, as of today you are now one of our fifteen leaders of Anbu. You have proven yourself. Any questions?" She looks around daring people to speak. She must have spoken to everyone of what Itachi had done for us. I squeeze Sasuke's leg in congratulations. He grabs my hand under the table and squeezes it.

"Now, the reason I've brought you all here. We all knew of the looming battles that we would face soon. Well, soon is today. Suna has fallen. It happened in the night. The Akatsuki has continued on for Iwa, and Kumo. Kiri is still standing. Lin and her people are handling themselves okay. But we need to go and stop any more deaths from happening. You team leaders will go over each team's plans separately. We have the element of surprise. They don't know that we know yet. We fight back tonight. We stop this before it finishes with the wrong side winning. This is what we've trained for people. We will win!." She says standing up and giving us more information for our trip to battle.

Hinata, Choji, and Ten Ten's teams are set to head Kirigakure where they will meet with the survived Gaara and his shinobi and residents that are left.

Rock Lee, Shino, Ino, and Kiba's teams are set to head to Iwagakure.

Neji, Shikamaru, Naruto, and Sasuke's teams are to head to Kumogakure.

Kakashi, and my own team have separate instructions but once they are taken care of we are supposed to split one going to Iwa and one going to Kumo.

"All of your teams will have extra shinobi. You are all going to have your own armies. This is it guys. This is where I expect to be able to trust in you to make the decisions necessary to win this, but even more importantly, save as many people as you can. There will be deaths. Godspeed." She says.

I look at Sasuke as he leaves the office. He's as scared as I am of not being together through this. I hope there's time to say goodbye. I have to stay behind to speak with Tsunade about our instructions. Kakashi moves over to sit across from me. He pats my hand in encouragement but I see the stress in his eyes. We are known as the Anbu leaders in charge of everything. It's only us called up when Tsunade needs something serious done.

"Okay guys. I will be with you. We are the best. The best chakra control, the best wits, the best strength. You are the key to this. My Intel tells me that the attacks on the villages are not even happening by the higher up Akatsuki members. Their leader in particular has been called a god because of his power. Take that with a grain of salt but be ready for nothing we've ever seen before. Sacrifices will have to be made. You and I. We are going after him and the main members. The root of all these problems. They claim peace can only come from mass destruction. This will not happen under our watch. Are you ready?"

She goes over the very loose term "plan". We have pieces of cloaks from current Akatsuki to hopefully help lead us to their base. Itachi comes to the table. I hadn't even realized he was still here. He is going to help us think like Akatsuki, and this…thing named Pain. Clever. Itachi had never met him face to face but had been in the same room with him. His body never in view.

"There's no time for goodbyes. We have to leave before everyone else. We have to assume that they have scouts watching us right now. Sakura, before we even leave this room we will use your jutsu to hide our chakra and keep us hidden. It's imperative that no one sees us leave this village, this room for that matter. Akatsuki tortures people. The less people that know we aren't holed up in here the better. I'm sorry that we have no time for goodbyes. Let's go people." Tsunade finishes.

My blood runs cold. I want to say no. I want to go run into Sasuke's arms and wrap my legs around him and not let go. I want to plan where to meet during all of this so that we aren't split up too long. But I know my duty. I know I'm supposed bare it and continue forward as a soldier. I straighten my shoulders and take a deep breath. I look at Itachi and Kakashi. We nod. We know it's time. I look at Tsunade and she takes a deep breath. "Well, let's get to it then"

I don't know what day it is.

My body feels like death.

All I have seen is death. For days.

I don't know how many days have gone by. I don't know how many dead bodies I've seen. How many I have tried to heal then lost. Tsunade and Kakashi were left with the leaders and Pain. They ended up adding Jaraiya to our group as well. We realized the fight was finally making its way to Konoha so I fled back to defend it with the rest of our army.

Eventually the thousands of Akatsuki I recognized that should be dead and rogue ninja they hired stopped coming. I think because we won. Only I was left to pick up the pieces. The only win I see right now is that the innocent villagers of Konoha are still alive. I can't say the same about the ninety five percent of my branch of our army that's dead. Because I couldn't keep them alive. The other five percent are wounded and waiting for more care from the medics and myself. I don't even know where I am.

The battlefield was a few miles out of Konoha to start with but it just expanded and widened farther than I could tell. I had to run around chasing wounded delusional soldiers so they could be saved. All the while having to fight off person after person with the intent of killing me specifically. This wounded soldier had run off the farthest I had gone yet. Miles. I can't even move I'm so completely...dead. I'm leaned against my patient for support so any time I gain a little bit more chakra I can give it to him so he doesn't die on me. I don't even know his name. I had been awol from Konoha over the years…so long that I lost the names of my soldiers in my head over the years. Another thing to add to the list that I suck at.

I've been trying not to think the worst...but nobody has come to find me. This gentleman and I have been at this tree all of yesterday, today, and until now. Maybe longer. I've been a little delusional. It's the time of night where it's just starting to merge into morning. I still can't use my legs. I had injured one in the middle of battle. I think it's infected. It's pulsing and the veins around it are infected. Not a good sign. On top of that I think almost all of my ribs are broken. My shoulder is dislocated. My brain feels fuzzy. I'm hungry and lost and fucking cold. But I need to make sure at least this one last person doesn't die on my watch. I lost almost an entire army. I'm ashamed and scared. Scared that Tsunade won't forgive me. That Naruto and Sasuke will see me as weak again. If they're even still alive. With my bad kind of luck they fucking died. The love of my goddamn life will be gone before we can really be with each other.

I've tried staying awake to keep this man and I from getting eaten by animals or worse. I use my last bit of chakra to protect us for at least a few hours while I sleep. Just for a minute.

Just a minute...dad...mommy...Saru...

Just…