Hey there everyone! No I am NOT dead! I just had an awful month of finals and crazy work hours and everything, but I'm still here! I know I should be continuing my AU, but I'm completely in the Christmas spirit and that story just popped out of my head last night after reading a RB Christmas fic!

It's way outside of my comfort zone, full of fluff and holiday joy! I really hope you enjoy it! For the purpose of that story, I'm saying that S3 ended in early December, although we don't really know when it did. Maybe it was more around January but anyway.

Thanks to Cabooklover for beta reading it, it was the first time I actually wrote something in English (And not translated it from French) And thanks to RookieD for giving me permission *winks* (and Christmas inspiration) to write this! This one is for you girl! *Sends warm holiday wishes all the way from my end of the world to yours*

When Sam came home from work that night, he didn't even spare a look to his decorated living room, going straight to his room. It was December the 23rd, and he wasn't feeling the Christmas spirit at all. He was working the next day, and there wasn't really anything to celebrate anyway. The girl he loved had left for some kind of undercover operation a little less than two weeks earlier; only a few hours after he had poured his heart out to her.

He made his way across the living room, not even bothering to turn on the lights and entered his room, doing a quick stop in the bathroom before putting on his pajama pants and slipping under the covers. It had been a long shift and he had no problem falling asleep even if it was only 10 pm.

A small knock woke him up in the middle of the night and he turned to look at the alarm clock. He had only been in bed for two hours. Getting himself out of the warmth of his blankets, he crossed the living room hastily, walking between the tree and the few decorations Sarah had put up when she was there the week before.

Sam finally opened the door a few seconds later, only realizing he was still in his PJs when he tried not to shiver as the cold December air hit the naked skin of his chest.

In front of him was the person he was least expecting to see there. Standing right outside his door was a snow-covered Andy McNally who looked like she was frozen to death. For a second there Sam froze too, looking at her like he was seeing a ghost.

"Are you gonna let me in? It's freezing out here." She finally said with a small smile, looking at her feet.

It was indeed freezing; the snow was still falling all around her and it seemed like she had walked for a while. Her loose brown hair was now more white than brown, and she had snowflakes stuck on her eyelashes, making her eyes sparkle in a weird way.

Not knowing what to say, Sam took a step back, letting her walk past him and enter the warm cocoon that was his apartment. He closed the door as soon as she was in and turned to look at her.

"I'm gonna put a shirt on, just… don't go anywhere okay?" He told her, putting his hands in front of him to support his request.

She nodded, starting to take off her coat, making a thin layer of snow fall to the ground at the same time. Sam was gone less than a minute, but by that time she was already standing in the middle of the living room.

"You did all of this?" She asked when he got out of his bedroom wearing a grey shirt.

Sam wrinkled his brow, wondering what she was talking about, and she pointed to the Christmas themed living room in which they were standing. He quickly took a look at the huge Christmas tree that was taking up probably one third of the room before letting his eyes travel to the lights around his window. Two red stockings were hung over the fireplace, and a snow globe was resting on the small table close to the wall.

Scratching the back of his neck with his left hand, Sam looked at Andy.

"Yeah," he said, shrugging. "Well, mostly Sarah. She wanted me to feel the Christmas spirit." He continued, standing awkwardly a few feet away from her.

Andy nodded, looking slowly all around.

"Andy… What are you doing here…?" He finally asked her, finding the courage to look her in the eyes.

"I walked. All the way from our cover apartment, I… I guess I needed to see you, which is probably incredibly stupid since that already got us in trouble once but I couldn't help it…" She started rambling, looking everywhere but at Sam.

"You walked? In that storm?" He said astonished, the snow had been falling for more than 6 hours, and they already had at least 15cm.

"It was the only night I could get away." She said shrugging. "It took me about an hour and a half."

That's when he realized her cheeks and nose were almost as red as the stockings hanging by the fireplace, and she was slightly shaking. He could tell she was trying to hide it, but she wasn't really good at it.

"There's a blanket on the couch, I'll light up a fire." He simply said as he got a couple of logs and small pieces of wood before placing them in the fireplace.

Sitting on the couch, she finally took the liberty to look at him. How could she have missed him so much in only two weeks? She thought she was done with all of that when she left, but when she was lying on the bed of their crappy cover apartment that night, the only thing she could think about was the speech he had just made.

She didn't regret taking the job; she knew it was the best thing to do. However, she was finding it hard to stay away from him, and she couldn't do it much longer, especially not with the holidays coming. Bringing her back to reality, Sam came to sit on the other end of the couch, looking at the fire that was now diffusing its warm glow across the room.

"I'm sorry I left without saying goodbye." She said quietly after a few more seconds of silence. "I understand if you're mad at me."

"Honestly? I was at first. I'm not anymore." He replied slowly, looking at the fire that was dancing on the other side of the room.

"I'm sorry…" She whispered, still not facing him.

Sam turned to look at her too; she was all snuggled up in the blanket, watching the fire. Her wet eyes were reflecting the colored lights that were hanging on the Christmas tree, and Sam's heart just couldn't take it anymore.

"Just come here." He finally said, opening his arms as she looked at him with a hopeful look.

He nodded as confirmation and a second later she was in his arms. Trying to cover them both with the blanket, Sam held her close to him, breathing in her still damp hair. She was cold in his arms, and he could feel her frozen cheek on his chest all the way through his shirt. Cuddling her a little closer to him, he rubbed her back, trying to warm her up.

"I missed you so much." She whispered in his chest, and he somehow knew she wasn't just talking about those two weeks in deep cover, but about the two months they had just spent apart.

He squeezed her slightly, resting a small kiss on the top of her head before saying it back. "I missed you too."

"I wish I could stay." She said not moving from the perfect spot in which she was.

"I know…" He only replied, not knowing what else he could say to make her feel better.

"I remember having all that excitement towards Christmas; I remember thinking about the fact that it would be our first. How did we end up like that?" She asked him not even bothering to raise her head to look at him, but he could hear the sadness in her voice.

"I don't know. Let's not talk about that now… Just for tonight, let's just act like nothing happened and we're still the same people we were before all that crazy shit went down." He only said, knowing that she would know he was talking about everything, from his best friend dying to her leaving for deep cover.

"I guess we can do that." He heard her whisper as she kept her head on his chest, stealing his warmth.

They stayed like that for a couple of minutes before one of them decided to start talking again, just enjoying each other presence.

"How's the operation going?" He finally asked her, not able to restrain his curiosity much longer.

"It's good, I don't really wanna talk about the job right now. I'm okay, that's all you need to know." She replied on a soft tone and he nodded, agreeing with her. "Nick helped me get away for tonight, he's covering for me." She added a couple of seconds later.

"I'm really glad you're okay." He told her with a smile. "You and Nick, you're acting as a couple?" He asked her after a few moments went by.

She laughed slightly, raising her head to look at him in the eyes.

"Why? You're jealous?" She asked as she raised an eyebrow.

"Maybe," he only said, smiling softly at her.

"Nick will always be like a brother to me; he's nothing more than that. He's a great friend, and I really like him. But he will never be you." She finally answered after a minute went by.

Sam didn't say one more word, just held her a little closer to him as he felt her relax under his touch. The fire was still providing its heat all the way to where they were sitting, and the Christmas tree was lighting up the room with red, green and yellow glows.

He had completely forgotten how it felt to have a real Christmas tree, and he made a mental note to thank Sarah later as he breathed in the scent of pine needles that was intertwined with the one of burnt wood and Andy's hair.

Andy sighed from satisfaction as she closed her eyes, trying to take in the perfection of this moment. God she was happy to be here and not in a crappy cover apartment, spending Christmas alone, far away from Sam and everyone else. She opened back her eyes to stare at the beautifully decorated tree that was standing in the corner of Sam's living room. She was suspecting Sam had nothing to do with it, he wasn't really the decorating type, but whoever did it had done an amazing job.

Her eyes drift off to the bottom of the tree, a small box resting underneath the green branches getting her attention. Wondering what it was, she leaned a bit towards the edge of the couch, looking at the package.

"Why is there only one present under the tree?" She asked as she turned back to him.

"It's nothing; I bought it about three months ago, and threw it in the back of my closet until Christmas. Sarah must've found it when she decorated the house and she put it there. I didn't have the heart to put it back in the closet." He told her as he stared at the box for a moment before looking back at her.

"Was it supposed to be mine?" She asked shyly as he was drawing random patterns on her back.

"Yes." He only answered before she quickly got up from the couch, untangling herself from the blanket in which she was draped.

As she took the few steps separating her from the tree, Sam looked at her with a small smile. That night was definitely not turning like he thought it would. She grabbed the small box covered in red shiny wrapping paper, suddenly thinking it was a good thing he got it wrapped at the store, because he was absolutely horrible at wrapping presents. She looked at him, silently asking for approbation which he granted with a nod.

She slowly removed the scotch tape that was holding it together, making a point to unwrap it without tearing anything off, making Sam smile. He somehow knew she was that kind of girl, the one to open her presents with all the care in the world, just like she was the kind of girl to save the good candy for later.

He raised his eyes to her face when she got the little black box out of the wrapping paper. It was about three times as long as it was wide and covered with black velvet. She carefully opened it and he saw her eyes widen as she glanced at the necklace resting on the soft material.

"I bought it after you said you loved me. I wasn't able to say it, and when I saw that." He said, leaving his sentence unfinished as she raised the locket in front of her eyes.

It was simple, a golden chain with a small heart on it. She put her hand behind it and brought it up closer to her eyes, turning it so she could see it properly and that's when she noticed it. It wasn't visible to anyone who wasn't looking, but there were two small 'S' engraved on the back of the gold heart and she looked at him with a smile.

"Now that I actually did say it, I guess it doesn't really mean the same thing anymore but…" He started before she interrupted him.

"On the contrary Sam, it means everything." She told him as she got closer to him, coming to sit between his legs, resting her back to his chest as he put the necklace around her neck.

Once he was done with the lock, he softly laid a small kiss to her shoulder, putting his arms around her as she continued staring at the Christmas tree. They stayed like that for a couple of minutes before she finally moved, getting out of his arms to go lay on the ground, putting her head under the branches of the tree, looking to the ceiling.

"What are you doing?" He asked frowning as he couldn't help but laugh at the picture she was making lying there.

"Come here." She ordered, patting the spot beside her. "Come' on." She repeated when she saw he wasn't moving.

Not really sure why he was doing this, he however went to lie next to her, their shoulders touching slightly. The first branches were a little higher than a foot from the ground and they actually had the space to rest their head under them.

As he looked up he understood why she was doing it, the lights were glowing everywhere, lighting up the decorations in a way he had never seen them, reflecting on the sparkly gold bows Sarah had insisted they used. The smell was also overwhelming down there, making him travel through time all the way back to his childhood when he would decorate the tree with his sister.

She slowly moved her hand until it was nudging against his and he took the hint, lacing their fingers gently as they both continued to stare at the tree.

"We use to do this with my mom; before she left." Andy started to explain, squeezing his hand a little harder. "It's actually one of the only Christmas memories I have with her."

"I can see why you would do it; it's kind of a great different way to look at it." He told her still holding her hand, slowly caressing it with the tip of his thumb.

They stayed like that for a few more minutes, not saying a word, just looking at the shimmering lights and appreciating the fact that they were together even if it was only for a few hours. She was the one to move first, getting out of under the tree only to sit cross-legged, looking at it from a small distance. Sam joined her only a moment later and she rested her head on his shoulder.

"You wanna go lie down?" He asked her as she yawned deeply, not even bothering to put her hand in front of her mouth.

"No I just wanna stay here." She said as she turned to look at him, her eyes moving between his mouth and his eyes.

Looking at her for one more second, he turned to grab the blanket and the cushion that were still on the couch and he put them on the carpet-covered floor, halfway between the fireplace and the Christmas tree. He slowly rested his head against the cushion, lying on the blanket, and she went to lie at his left, pulling on the other side of the blanket so it was covering both them.

He was gently caressing her arm with the tip of his fingers, and she raised her head, turning so she could look at him as she ran her fingers against his jaw before moving her face a little closer to his. Ever so slowly, she rested her lips over his in what was probably the gentlest kiss they ever shared.

Neither of them wanted to break it off, and they just stayed there, lost in the feeling that they had missed so much since they broke up a few months back. Sam moved his right hand so he was holding the back of her neck and she moved hers so it was on his chest, feeling his heart beating under it.

"We're being incredibly stupid." She said when she finally managed to get her lips off of his.

"Yes we are; I guess we'll never learn." He replied softly, feeling that impression of déjà vu as he said the same exact words she used not even a year ago.

"Maybe it's because we can't stay away from each other even if we sometimes act like we can." She continued, running her fingers against his cheek.

"That's probably it." He said smiling before he raised his head to kiss her again, realizing that he wouldn't get to do that for the next few weeks, probably even months.

She kissed him back with everything she was feeling and finally dropped her head back on his chest a few minutes later, moving her hand so it was again resting on his chest as he held her close with his left arm. They didn't speak one more word, just lied there in the fading glow of the fireplace, the smell of the tree still floating around them.

Sam didn't know when they had fallen asleep, but when he woke up the next morning, she was gone. There was a note on the ground; at the same place where she was just only a few hours ago and he slowly picked it up, sighing.

"My dear Sam,

I know I should've woken you up when I left but I had pretty good reasons not to. First, you looked so peaceful and really handsome sleeping there in the light of the Christmas tree; I wanted to engrave that image in my mind. And second, I don't think I could've left if you had asked me to stay, and we both know I had to go back this time.

I will be thinking of you every hour of every day. Wait for me.

I love you, your Andy"

As Sam read the not for the fourth time, he realized she was completely right, and he would've probably asked her to stay. She had to go back to the task force, those things didn't work like this and he was the first to understand that.

Looking at his watch, he quickly got up the floor, every inch of his body sore from sleeping on the ground, and so tired his eyes were probably as red as the Santa hat Sarah had picked up for when he would go see her and the kids after his shift.

However, as he made his way to the precinct, he couldn't help but feeling a hundred times better than the day before, because he had hope. Things would probably never be perfect between them, but they would never be able to stay apart either. Maybe Sarah was right when she talked about all that stuff about Christmas spirit, magic and everything; because what had just happened the night before was most definitely some kind of miracle…

So what did you think? Drop a line to tell me! Reviews are like early Christmas presents that are always getting a smile on my face! :) Thanks for reading!