He Loves Me

Chapter One: Thank you

You love me especially different every time. You keep me on my feet. Happily, excited by; your cologne, your hands, your smile, your intelligence. You woo me. You court me. You tease me. You please me. You school me. Give me some things to think about. Ignite me. You invite me. You co-write me. You love me. You like me. You incite me … He Loves Me, Jill Scott

It was mornings like this that made me happy. It was nights like last night, nights that made me feel so vulnerable, that made me feel whole, made me feel human, that made my heart pound in my chest, my breathing hitch, my head swim, my cheeks flush.

From where my head rested I could hear his heart beat, I could feel his chest rise and fall, his warmth. His arms were wrapped around me. We were still naked from the night before, nothing but a plain flat sheet covering us.
The sun was rising, breaking through the blinds. I look up at him. He's still sleep. Carefully, I get up. He exhales loudly as if annoyed and adjusts himself, but stays sleeping. I can't help but smile.

The room is a mess. Clothes thrown about, the fitted sheet halfway off the mattress, blanket in a heap in the corner, condom wrappers, used condoms, lube, all in random places upon the floor.

I rummage through a drawer and slip on a pair of his sweat pants. They hang loosely around my hips, but they should suffice. I begin to pick up, putting the clothes in the hamper, used condoms and wrappers in the trash, lube on the night stand.

It looks a lot more presentable. The bed sheets will have to be washed, but trying to tackle that right now would be close to impossible. I decide to wander into his kitchen. This was the first time I have been to Chris Redfield's apartment. It was exactly as I imagined. Simple.

At least he has pancake mix. I ladle some batter onto a hot buttered pan with a satisfying sizzle. It's silly, but I begin to hum. I haven't felt this way in a long time. From my peripheral vision I see Chris leaning against the door frame watching me. He is smiling, arms crossed, and naked.

"Good morning, Cap'n!"

"I think you're more than welcome to call me Chris now."

He is walking up to me. I loved it when he smiled and he never did it as often as he should, so I cherished everyone that crossed his lips. His arms wrap around me and kisses the nape of my neck.

"I'd much rather have you for breakfast," he says nibbling on my earlobe.

"Now, now, Captain. You"ll make me burn the pancakes," I say backing my ass into him to push him back.

He laughs.

"Those are damn near falling off, Nivans. Maybe I should just take them off."

He slides his hands down my waist taking the pants with.

"Hey! I am trying to cook and I would like to do so without burning your place down."

Then I can smell smoke. Feel heat. I am no longer in a bright lit kitchen. I couldn't move. Was I tied down? Have I been captured? I can't even remember what happened. My breathing quickens, heart rate peaks. I can't see out of one eye, my right arm numb. What is this?

"Hey, Asshole. You finally up?"

That voice. I know it, but I can't seem to place it.

"Hey you hear me? Shit, don't tell me I rescued ya for nothin'. I don't really want to put you down like this."

I try to speak, but my mouth is dry and my throat burns.

"Wa-water," I gasp out, my own voice hoarse and foreign.

"Don't you think you've had enough of that? You were practically drownin' when I got you."

I tried to get up to put a face to the voice, but everything was sore and hurt.

"Don't move, Stupid. C'mon aren't you BSAA guys supposed to be smarter than that? I patched you up as good as I could but I ain't exactly a doctor."

He places on hand underneath my head and gently lifts it to a canteen. I quickly lap up the clear cold liquid.

"Breath, Puppy. There's plenty more where that came from."

He gently lays my head back. Puppy? Suddenly my mind slams into a gun being aimed at Chris' face there is yelling and I am holding a gun up to a shadow of a man.

"You better put a leash on your puppy."

"I know you." My voice still hoarse.

"Yeah. You trying to tell me you have amnesia or somethin'?"

"I don't remember much. I remember who I am, what I do. But things are hazed when I try to remember what happened."

Suddenly a rush of panic goes through my entire body.

"Where is Chris?"

"Back where he belongs. Don't worry, you saved your master."

"Piers, don't do this! We can both still make it out of here! PIERS!" Chris' voice rattles around in my brain.

"However, I heard from a friend that you've been determined "killed in action.""

"If I am supposed to be dead, how, why did you find me?"

"Trust me, it wasn't by choice. It's more like an accident. I was clearing the area of remaining BOWs and I went to the water front to get a drink and there you were. I thought you were a j'avo. You were butt naked, and slightly mutated. I was going to shoot you in the head, but you looked up at me. When I realized it was you, I shot you up with some of the antidote instead and patched you up. So here we are."

"Why not leave me to rot?"

"I kinda owe you. You didn't only sacrifice yourself for Chris. You did it for me and Sherry. For the world."

"I did it for the BSSA. For the future." My own voice echoes from somewhere.

The sound of the fire fills the air for a moment while we collect our thoughts.

"I am hungry. Have I been gone for long?"

"Long enough, I guess."

"They didn't look for me?"

"You were infected and presumed dead."

"Am I a monster?"

"Well that claw thing has disappeared and your arm looks pretty beat up, but normal. Your face is a little messed up. Other than that I don't know. I have been treating you."

"With what?"

"The antidote they made with the antibodies I provided."

I still didn't understand. My head hurt when I tried to think too hard. It hurt to try and remember. He slowly picks me up. I groan in pain and he leans me against the wall. With my good eye I look around. It's dark. The fire lit in the fireplace the only light. It was clear that the cabin was abandoned, dusty furniture, cobwebs, a couple broken windows.

Then there was him. Lean yet muscular, tall, with very short reddish blonde hair. His eyes a deep piercing blue, and a scar running down the side of his face.

"All you jarheads look the same to me." It clicked.

"Jake Muller."

"Yeah. You remember." He said turning away and disappearing into the kitchen.

"Yeah. You're a jerk."

"I'm the jerk who saved your sorry ass."

"Thank you."

I was left alone to my thoughts, the smell of whatever he was cooking filling my nostrils, making my stomach growl. What the hell happened to me?

"Oh no, Piers, what did you do?" Chris. Where are you now?

I shut my eyes tight trying to see the past. Instead I hear footsteps. Jake returned with food. A meat cooked rare and canned string beans. The meat was gamey and seasoned with just salt and pepper. If I wasn't so hungry I might have refused it.

I was surprised when my right hand responded to my command. It still felt numb, like it was just waking from sleep. It looked relatively normal, other than dark angry looking scars. I wondered if my face looked the same.
I scarfed down the food and gulped the water. I was practically licking the plate clean when I noticed him staring. My cheeks burned red.

"Sorry." I say meekly.

"It's cool. How ya feelin'?"

"I feel ok. In a lot of pain though."

He just nods taking a bite of the meat.

"Where's the bathroom?" I ask trying to stand, but fail and fall flat on my ass.

Jake just raises an eyebrow and tosses me an empty bottle.

"Unless you have to shit, piss in that."

"The truth is I wanted to see what I looked like, and take a shower."

"Sorry, no running water yet. Gotta wait 'til the morning. I doubt your strong enough to get around on your own though."

"Oh. How'd I get in here?"

"I carried your sorry ass."

I looked down, I was wearing a black quarter length sleeved shirt and a pair of light blue jeans. He must have dressed me in his own clothing.

"Thank you again."

"Yeah, yeah." He said taking the plate.

He returned from the kitchen and gently tossed a water bottle at me. I tried to catch it, but if fell on my lap instead.

"You should try and rest some more. We'll try to get you up and about in the morning."

I nod sadly and sort of just slide down into a laying position. I felt so helpless completely incapable of doing anything. A tear rolls down from my good eye and onto the folded up material beneath my head. I close my eyes hoping to be in that kitchen again. Just hoping to be with Chris again.
But my mind has other plans. I dream of a skull with eyes sitting in the other wise empty sockets, large tentacles, lightening, then darkness.

"Hey. Hey. C'mon."

I feel a boot nudge my shoulder. Jake stands over me with a concerned look.

"I'm awake."

"Good."

He starts to put boots onto my feet.

"They still wet?"

I shake my head.

"Good. See if you can get up now." He says stepping back, but he stays close enough just in case he needs to catch me.

For a moment I don't move, trying to strategize how to force myself in just a sitting position. I use the leverage from my elbows and push myself up. My muscles burn and my body quakes. Finally, I push myself up to a full seated position and I have to stop.

"Not bad. But can we hurry this up? I gotta take a leak."

Very shaky, I start to stand, almost falling. With lightening speed Jake grabs me and steadies me. I use him and the wall to stand up straight.
He carefully kicks away the blankets and materials from my feet. I take my firstly few steps still holding onto him and the wall, then I let go of the wall. My stride becoming steadier. I let go of Jake, but he still holds on to me.

"I think I got it. Thank you."

With that he lets go, but stays close.

"Good. So my friend said she'd stop by and take a look at you."

We walk outside. The sun is too bright and hurts. I end up closing my eyes and stop walking. Every sound is slightly amplified.

"You do that." Jake says coldly.

I hear his footsteps moving farther away, his fly unzip and a steady stream of urine hit the leaf carpeted floor of the forest.

"The sun is too bright, asshole. And my right eye isn't in it's best shape right now."

"Excuses."

The stream stops and a zipper zips. Footsteps coming closer. A hand on my shoulder.

"That better not be the hand your dick was in."

"Wouldn't you like to know."

My eyes open and he is smiling at me and for some reason I blush.

"C'mon little puppy."

He grabs my hand and pulls me through the woods. I can hear the water getting closer. He must have carried me a long way from where he found me. Or I drifted a long way from where I "died".

"Did you carry me for long?"

"Yeah."

He has done so much for me. Why? I can feel a certain distaste for him, but there was something about him. It was a lake with clear water.

"Salt water." I mindlessly say aloud.

"No. Fresh water." His tone correcting and mean.

"I know this is fresh water, jack ass, salt water is what I was in when you found me."

"Oh. Yeah. Like I said I carried you for a long time. I almost gave up on you a couple times."

He brings a handful of water to his face. The droplets dance down his face, a few following the path of his scar. I suddenly get the urge to follow it as well, but I kneel down and splash my face with water instead. He starts to fill the canteen.

"How are you feelin'?"

"Ok."

He nods. I start to drop my hands into the water again but I catch a glimpse of my reflection. My right eye is a ghostly pale white and the right side of my face has dark purplish scars running across it.
Then my gaze travels to my arm, it looks a lot worse in the sun as apposed to the dim fire. I mindlessly start to strip off the strange clothes until I am fully nude. Throwing them to the side and kicking off the boots.
The scars run from the right side of my face, to my neck, shoulder and arm. A few scars riddle my chest, side, and leg. Then I stare into the water. At the whole picture.

"I am a monster." I whisper.

Jake steps in front of me, blocking my view and places a firm grip on my shoulders sending chills and pangs of pain through my body.

"It's not that bad."

I stare at his scar. My arm raises and I trace it with my fingertip gently. He flinches slightly. Now I am mindlessly tracing it over and over with my thumb. It was perfect, beautiful, and a mystery I want to solve.

"Alright. That's enough of that." He says grabbing my hand.

I shake my thoughts.

"They get lighter with time." He says moving out of the way.

"Thank you." My voice quiet and small.

No words could really express my gratitude.

"Just get in the damn water. I seen enough of you naked for an entire lifetime."

Following his words like an order, I walk into the water. It's cold, but feels good on my skin. The scars on my body slowly start to hurt and I yelp.

"What's the matter? You ok?" Urgency and worry replace the coldness.

"They hurt."

"It'll be ok. Just wash up really quick and come back out."

The sun was high now and burned hot. I covered my genitals when I walked out of the water. The cold had really gotten to me in the worst way. Jake was gone and I began to panic.
Before I could react, he was back with a towel and wrapped it around my waist.

"Thank you."

"I caught some rabbit for dinner, I am thinking we can have fish for lunch, and there are some wild strawberries we can have now."
He didn't look at me while he spoke.

"Sounds good."

"Maybe I will go to the shop later and pick up more supplies now that you are up and able to move around."

"Ok."

"Sherry said she'd make it in tonight so…" He trailed off, or maybe I stopped listening.

His thin pink lips still moving but no sound came from them. His deep blue eyes pulling me in deeper into the abyss. Then my lungs feel like they are filling with water. I can't breath. Before I know it I'm on the floor convulsing.

"Piers! PIERS!" But was it Chris' voice or Jake's?

When I came to I was back in the cabin, dressed and warm. My throat burned and mouth dry.

"Here I brought more antidote. I will run tests on his blood and let you know what I find. Don't worry I won't let what happened to us happen to him. We are more than test subjects now, but they will see him and…I don't want to even think about it." It was a woman's voice.

"I don't know, Sher. I feel like he needs to be some place better, with doctors and other people. I don't know if I am really cut out for this."

"Jake, you're perfect for this. If we turn him in you know what they'll do. And if he ends up in the wrong hands who knows. I will let you know the results. Keep up the good work."

She kisses his cheek. They walk out together and I feel sick. How long was I out? Jake said she wasn't coming until nightfall. Maybe he called her in earlier because of what happened? I feel like such a burden. Jake walks back in.

"What happened?" I say.

He smiles and sits next to me.

"You spazed. Sherry said that your memories might be trying to smash through all at once. You might have a concussion and some other junk. Can't take you no where without stirring up trouble. Don't want you to become a lab rat. You know simple shit. So here we are." He smirked.

"Thank you, Jake."

He squeezes my left hand and disappeared in the kitchen. I am left to my thoughts as the smell of his cooking causes my stomach to growl.

A/N: I do not own Resident Evil or it's characters nor do I own the song He Loves Me by Jill Scott. Please read and review. Thanks!