AN: MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! This chapter is your gift! I can't say how sorry I am for not updating in the past months but everything just came crushing down and I didn't have the time or the motivation to write. I can't say I'm back because I really can't seem to find enough time for anything lately, but I intend to finish this story. There will be one more final chapter I think and that's it! I hope you enjoyed this story and you like this chapter! Let me know what you think! Hugs

"Damon, you're hurting me!" I whimpered as I clawed at his hand that was crushing my windpipe.

"Oh really? And why should I care? You clearly don't care about how I feel." He growled and shoved me against the wall again, causing the back of my head to start bleeding. I cried out.

"Just tell me one good reason why you did this, Elena. What did you want to prove? What is it you needed to know so much that you had to get into my head and watch my darkest memories? Or did you simply do it for fun? And I used to think that Katherine was the sadistic bitch."

He knocked my head against the wall again. My vision started to swim as he let me go and I slumped down onto the floor. My voice was weak when I spoke.

"Do you really think I did it for my own entertainment? You've been having this nightmare for weeks. I just wanted to help you! I know you have been through too much and I wanted to prevent your falling apart!" My voice was getting steadier and louder with every word and by the end of my speech I was yelling at Damon, pushing myself onto my feet.

"My falling apart? That would be weak of me Elena and I'm not weak! Now get the hell out of here before I rip your throat out." He growled and a feeling of déja vou hit me.

"No you won't, Damon. This is what you always do when you are upset! You push people away. Make them hate you or be angry at you because you don't know how to handle when someone is compassionate towards you. Because it's easier that way. And also because you want to punish yourself. You still feel guilty about your mothe-"

"Enough!" He growled and made a jump for me but surprisingly I managed to dodge him. "Don't you think that just because you've been in my head you know anything about me! " He hissed, but I could sense that the fight in him was slowly ebbing away as he sat down onto his bed.

I gently went over to him and touched his arm. He didn't flinch away. "Damon, you need to talk about this to someone. You can't carry all this pain bottled up inside you."

"You want to talk? Fine, let's talk! Where do you want to start? Should I first talk about my mother who was probably the only person who has ever loved me? Or do you want to hear about how I killed her? Though I'm pretty sure that you've seen it all in my head. You would you like me to describe the things my father did to me? How he used to abuse me and rape me?"

His breath hitched and his voice started to waver. I wrapped my arms around him and I could feel him trembling. Then he continued. "Of all the things I believe I like the whip the most. It was fast and it caused a sharp stinging pain of course not so much after my father…" Damon's words started to jumble and they slowly transformed into sobs.

I tried to comfort him, but he kept whimpering "I'm sorry" and his sobbing intensified by every second. After a while he started to heave then he threw up, red blood mixed with the food we had eaten earlier onto the carpet.

I kept rubbing his back and murmuring comforting words but it didn't seem to have much effect on him.

After his stomach had been completely emptied I lay him back into his bed and covered him with thick blankets. He was becoming really cold.

As soon as I tucked him in Damon nuzzled his head into my neck and he resumed sobbing. I really had no idea how to calm him down. I had never seen Damon cry before. Sure he shed a tear once or twice but he never cried.

Suddenly an idea struck me and I started to hum him the lullaby that I heard in his dream. This seemed to work and slowly he drifted off to sleep.

I quickly checked his dreams to see if he was having the nightmare again, but his mind was completely blank. Good.

A few minutes later I drifted off too. Entering Damon's dreams took a lot out of me.

I woke up a couple hours later only to find that Damon was still asleep beside me. I quickly peeked into his head to see if he was having a nightmare again, but his mind seemed to be still blank.

I went downstairs and got a rag and some super-cleaning powder from Stefan's bathroom to clean up the blood from Damon's carpet. With a lot of rubbing I managed to get all of it out.

Then I decided to make some light food for Damon and I brought some blood-bags up from the basement.

When I was done I went upstairs and sat onto the bed and just waited for Damon to wake up. We had a lot to talk about.

The sun was setting when his eyelids began to flutter open. His eyes quickly scanned the room then they settled on me.

"Hmmm…Elena you are sitting too far away." He smirked and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. It's amazing how he managed to get back to himself after all that happened earlier that day.

But I wasn't going to let him get away without talking things through. I decided to give him some time to collect his thoughts but we needed to talk before Caroline and Stefan came back from their trip. He ate the food I had brought him in silence and drained all three blood-bags.

"How are you feeling?" I asked as we were walking down into the living room.

"I'm feeling pretty great. Thank you for the breakfast, or dinner or whatever. And I'm glad that you didn't manage to chop off your fingers without my supervision." He smiled at me but it was obvious that he was trying to avoid the serious topic at hand.

We sat down onto the sofa, with my feet on his lap and after a few minutes of silence I realised that our time was running out.

"We need to talk about what happened yesterday night." Damon closed his eyes and exhaled through his nose.

"We do. But can't we just enjoy some peace for a little while?" He almost sounded like a whining child.

"I'm sorry Damon, but Stefan and Caroline will be back soon and I don't know when we will get the opportunity to be able to talk privately again." I knew that even now Stefan was worried sick and desperately jealous that I was left alone with Damon and I could even imagine him throwing a fit if I suggested that I go out on a trip with Damon or get left alone with him for a night at the lakehouse.

"All right. Let's talk. But first I want you to know that if you say a word of this to my brother, I will hurt you, Elena. Stefan never knew about any of this and he never will." His voice was low and threatening.

"So it was only you then. I thought that this might be the case. But why? You were the firstborn, the heir. It can't have been because of your mother as he seemed to have disliked you even before her death."

Damon let out a bitter laugh. "His motive is fairly simple, really. I was born with raven black hair and blue eyes. Our father had green eyes and brown hair. He thought that either our mother cheated on him or I was the child of the devil himself. And of course the other reason is what you've already said yourself. It always has been and will always be Stefan." His voice became really low and sad and I immediately felt bad for him.

Of course I remembered saying that. I'd said it mere seconds before he snapped the neck of Jeremy. I never knew that this was a sore spot for him, though it made sense. Everyone loved Stefan. First his father, then Katherine, then Rebekah & Klaus, then there was Caroline, who ended up on Stefan's side and finally me. I felt guilty and really wanted to comfort him somehow, but I had no idea why fate was so cruel to him.

So instead of words, I simply went over to him and hugged him. He accepted the hug, but didn't return it. Finally he took my arms from around him and started speaking again

"It's okay, Elena. Really, I'm used to it. Though I'm not sure what could have triggered these nightmares, or how I could stop them. And I still don't understand why you felt the need to get into my head and watch them." I took a deep breath, here we go…

"Well, it was obvious that you were having nightmares and, please don't freak out, but I got into your head first when I slept over last week and saw some of it. Realising that it was probably something more than a simple nightmare I spoke to Meredith…"

Damon growled. "You did what?"

"Listen, she was the only person I dared to trust with this and actually she could help quite a lot since she is qualified in psychology too. Anyways I talked to her and she figured out that you probably have some sort of PTSD and told me how I could be able to help you. And I believe that since you've let it all out of your system now you may be able to sleep peacefully again."

Damon seemed to contemplate this. "Hmmm… you may be right, however, now I will have to compel the good doctor, which might be a bit difficult since she is on vervain. But a good 3-day-long vacation in our basement and she will be back working." I never thought that it would be so easy to convince Damon not to kill her, but I guess he didn't want to have to deal with disposing of her corpse.

"But what are you going to tell Stefan if he asks why she is here?"

He smirked. "That's where you come into the picture. Since you are the one who got us into this mess in the first place it will be your job to explain to my lil bro that you missed him so much that you want to skip school and go on a romantic vacation with him."

I sighed sadly. After everything that happened I really didn't want to leave Damon alone. "But what about you? What if the nightmares return?"

"Then you will be the first person to know about it." He reassured me with a soft smile. Then he started to get up. "Now, since we've gone through all the gloomy subjects I suggest that we do something waaay more fun!"

I smiled and let him pull me up from the bed and down the stairs. "What do you have in mind?"

"Hmmm…I'm not sure you want to know." He winked at me.

"No, Damon! I meant what kind of fun things you know to pass the time that don't include sex." He pouted and I rolled my eyes.

"Well there goes my plan to ravage you on the kitchen table…" Cocky smirk. "But of course we can do some more boring stuff there…like cooking, you seemed to enjoy that. Or we could watch a movie if you want. Or even do the hair-braiding, nail painting thing, though I have to warn you that I'm not too good at that."

My stomach growled at the thought of food. "Well, I would just love to see you paint my nails, but I'm also pretty hungry. How about we cook something quick then do the hair-braiding and nail painting in front of the fire."

"All right. Though I don't know how long we have until Stefan and Caroline arrive."