Rachel wearily fumbled with the door, almost falling through once she managed to get it opened, and, after dropping her keys on the little table in the hallway, shuffled into her living room and sat down heavily on the sofa. Her head painfully throbbed and she didn't have to look in the mirror to know that right now her eyes would be red and puffy. She'd just got back from making one of the most difficult decisions of her life. Dom, her stupid Dom was now god knows where, running. He couldn't run forever, they were both aware of that, but she couldn't hand him over to the police. Not when she was inadvertently to blame for.. for.. she shuddered and laid back into the sofa.

Ohhhh shit. What the hell have I done? she thought to herself tiredly. If anyone found out that she had let a murderer - Oh, my God. My Dom is now a murderer.. he is a - she shook her head as if to try and dispell the nausea, and tried to think rationally. If she was found out, she could say bye to her job. She had just narrowly avoided being fired over the PNC trouble, and now this. Trouble seemed to follow her around. And she was sick of it. I just want some peace, she pleaded to heavens above. It seemed heaven wasn't in a particularly giving mood today. There was someone at the door.

Rachel cursed under her breath as she walked to the front door, which she leaned against for a couple of seconds in a futile attempt of trying to get herself together before facing whoever the bloody hell was on the other side of that door. She really wasn't in the mood for this. She opened the door..

'Hi Rachel, may I come in?' Julie said, studying Rachel carefully, no doubt keeping note of the puffy eyes, blotchy skin, mascara streaked down the cheeks and hair sticking up every which way. Rachel self consciously tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ears, while sending threatening thoughts to whoever had sent Julie her way, especially at this time.

'Uh.. I- sorry, yeah course, come in' she said, as she stepped back so Julie could walk through. 'The living room is just around the corner on your right.' She almost asked Julie if she'd like a drink, but stopped herself just in time. She did not want this woman here any longer than was necessary. Rachel sighed to herself as she realized just how much of a mess the flat was at the minute. To be fair, keeping things tidy and clean hadn't been at the top of her priorities for the last couple of days. Realizing Julie was already in the frontroom and probably wondering what was taking Rachel so long, she hurried in to where Julie was sat, hands on lap, taking in her surroundings. 'Sorry about the mess.. um.. I haven't done much tidying recently as you can see', she smiled weakly.

'Not to worry, Rachel. It's completely understandable. Look, I won't beat about the bush, you look wrecked, which isn't any small surprise and I'm sure you just want some time to yourself, so I'll just get to the point.' Julie looked sympathetically at Rachel, before continuing 'I know that you're probably expecting bad news everytime you see my face nowadays, but I actually have some good news for you!'

'Oh.. really?' Rachel mumbled, knowing that no amount of good news could lift her spirits at the moment, unless she woke up in the next few minutes and realized she'd been embroiled in a nightmare. Julie wasn't to know that though, and she looked genuinely pleased, so Rachel tried to look optimistic so as to not raise any suspicion. 'I'm in dire need of some good news..'

'Well, basically, you're 100% eliminated from our enquiries! A taxi driver has come forward, informed us that he picked you up two nights ago at midnight from the tower and dropped you home at approximately 12.15am, where you proceeded to fall out of the cab, hence the scrape on your forehead. Obviously your sister and other witnesses have verified your wherabouts until then, so I am SO pleased to inform you that you are no longer a suspect. Isn't that fab news?' Julie was smiling, obviously expecting Rachel to beam back at her.

'Oh.. wow. That's.. brilliant.' she replied, her voice shaking slightly. 'Sorry, I'm just in shock I think, over everything that's happened, you know?'

'Yeah of course, Rachel. That's completely normal in these circumstances. Listen, obviously you're the first person I' ve told, but I'm going to ring DCI Murray to let her know as well, she has supported you all along, and I'm sure she'll be pleased. She said she didn't want to lose such a good detective like you.' Julie rambled on, barely pausing for breath, 'So I'm going to make a move. I can see it'll take a while for it to sink in, and I hope you understand that none of this was personal, we just had to follow all lines of enquiry, and I'm more pleased than I can tell you that I'm able to dismiss this particular line. Oh, and before I forget, here's you're mobile.. almost forgot it in my rush to get here.'

'No, no of course. I understand. It's fine.' Rachel interrupted, trying to say all the right things so Julie would leave and she could try and figure out what the hell to do. 'But you're right, I think it's all taken it's toll on me, I think I just need an early night and time alone to think.'

After a couple more minutes of conversation, Julie left, and Rachel, without even the energy to get back into the frontroom, she slid down to the floor in the hallway and cried some more.

xxx

As she opened her eyes, Rachel looked out of her bedroom window, trying to discern what time it was. Hmmm, it wasn't fully dark, so either early morning or early evening. She rolled over and reached for her mobile phone which was on the bedroom drawers next to her bed. It was 5.30pm. Which meant that only a couple of hours had passed since she'd literally crawled from the hallway into her bed. It only took a minute or so for everything to come back to her as she lay there, and the dread laid heavily on her heart once more. Everything had changed in a measly two days.. how had that happened? She couldn't get her head around it. She only knew two things. One, what she'd done, giving Dom the chance to run, was the only choice she could have morally made. However unethical it was, however unprofessional, she knew she wouldn't have been able to live with herself if she'd put her baby brother in prison. Secondly, if it got out that she had the chance to arrest a murderer, and she had let him go, and actually TOLD him to go on the run, there was no doubt she would be sacked. Also, she couldn't let the police run around trying to find a murderer when she knew who it was. Rachel knew how stretched the force was, how many other cases would be pushed to one side to try and catch this person. There was only one thing she could do, even though it scared the crap out of her. She picked up her mobile again, scrolled through the numbers until she found the one she needed, and hit the call button.

'DCI Gill Murray' said the voice on the other end of the phone.

'Er, hi boss. It's.. ahem.. it's Rachel. Rachel Bailey.'

'Rachel! I just heard the news. I'm so glad that they've come to their bloody senses and cleared you. Julie called me. How are you feeling?'

'I'm.. well, uh, I have to tell you something.'

'Right.' Professionalism suddenly entered Gill's voice, replacing the warmth that had been there just a second before. 'What is it? What's the matter?'

Rachel took a deep breath, hoping the nausea would ease a bit. 'I know. I mean, er- shit.' She wasn't handling this well. 'I mean, I know who did it. I know who killed Savage.'

'Whaat? What do you mean?' Gill replied. When she got no answer, she said more forcefully 'Rachel, you need to tell me what you are talking about. Right now.'

'I..' Rachel's hands were shaking so hard, she wondered how she hadn't dropped the phone. 'It was.. oh God. Okay, erm.. it was Dom. My brother. Remember, I told you a bit about him on our trip away? He..' she trailed off, desperately hoping she wouldn't vomit. She was a nervous wreck.

'Dom? Your brother? I'm sorry, I must be misunderstanding. DC Bailey, are you telling me that your brother is the person who murdered Nick Savage?' When even Gill sounded shocked, you knew it wasn't good.

'Ye-yes. Alison - my sister - was the one who called when I was in your office earlier, boss. When I went to meet her she told me that Dom had confessed, had explained what he'd done, and had then told Ali that he was doing a runner and catching a train somewhere. She rang me as soon as he'd gone.' Rachel paused for breath.

'Shiiiiit. What happened then? Why didn't you phone it in straightaway?'

'I- I wasn't thinking straight ma'am. I pegged it to the train station to see if I could catch him. Even if I had left it and phoned it in, we wouldn't know where he was headed, I thought if I could get to him before he boarded a train, I could calm him down and bring him in.' By now Rachel was just making this up on the spot. You didn't work on MIT for 2 years and not learn how to bullshit when needed. In actual fact, she hadn't been thinking at all when she chased after Dom, she just needed to see him. She hadn't planned ahead to what would happen if she'd caught up with him.

'Okay. That makes sense. So what happened? Did you catch up with him?' Gill seemed to believe her, thank God.

'No ma'am. I didn't. I tried. I chased him through the station but then he lost me. I'm so sorry.' She started crying. With everything she had gone through, keeping up this pretense felt like the last straw. But she knew it was the only choice she had. 'I know I should have told Julie when she came, but I wasn't thinking straight, I wasn't functioning.'

'Okay, Rachel. Calm down. I'll inform Julie. You did your best, it's obviously a huge shock to you. Listen, I'll sort everything out this end, and get Julie's team on this information. You get some rest. Don't feel like you have to come in tomorrow, but if you want to, that's fine. And if you need to talk, I'm here. I know I can be scary' she smiled to herself briefly 'but I will help in any way I can. You've done the right thing Rachel. Really you have.' And with that, the conversation was over.

Rachel roughly wiped the tears from her face as she ran to the bathroom, and her head became acquainted with the toilet bowl.

xxx

Rachel was back in bed, drifting in and out of scary dreams with her face pressed hard against her tear stained pillow, when the door went. She jolted upright, looking around wildly, still half asleep when the door went again. 'Shit! Why can't people just leave.. me.. alone!' she muttered to herself. Just ignore it, Rach. You don't need this. Just lie down and pretend you're not here. she thought to herself as she followed her own advice and slid back down into bed. Whoever was at the door though was particularly insistent. After five minutes of willing the world away, Rachel wrenched herself out of bed and shouted 'I'm bloody coming. Hold ON!' in the doors general direction, while she had a swig of water and slowly approached the door. Whoever it is, send them away. Tell them you're ill. It's okay. She tried to convince herself, already preparing excuses as to why they couldn't come in. She slowly opened the door, and to her surprise saw Janet on the other side, tears streaming down her face, a bag by her feet...

'Oh.. my God! Janet! Are you okay? What's happened?' Rachel asked urgently.

'Can I come in? I- I..' she looked so lost, so alone that Rachel, despite her own crap, felt herself ushering her best friend in, embracing her and holding her tight.

'Of course you can.. come on, go into the living room, and I'll make us a brew.' Rachel watched as Janet picked up her bag and walked into the frontroom, looking as rough as she felt. Her head was racing as she made the drinks, keeping an ear out to her if Janet said anything, but Janet remained silent except from a couple of sniffles coming from her vicinity. Rachel put the drinks on a tray, grabbed some hobnobs from the cupboard and walked into the frontroom. 'Now.. what's going on, Jan?' she asked gently.

'It's Ade. He's.. oh God. He's kicked me out. Andy, the bastard, rang up the house while Ade was there and told him about that night at the Christmas do.' The last words were choked out as another sob engulfed Janet, while Rachel just looked on in shock. 'I'm so sorry to turn up here, Rach. Honestly. I have nowhere to go. My mother will just go on at me, and I have noone else. Please.. can I stay?'

'Oh, Jan. Of course you can. Of course you can. I'm here as long as you need me.'

xxx

SIX WEEKS LATER.

Rachel and Janet had gotten into a quite good routine. Obviously, it helped that they'd lived together briefly before. They each knew each others temperament in the mornings, they knew their peeves and first and foremost they knew when the other one needed a hug, a kind word, some advice. They also knew when they needed space. It might be a bit cramped at Rachel's place, but they managed, and they grew even closer as time went by. Janet saw the girls every other day at least, and Taisie and Elise loved coming over to Rachel's pad and hanging out with their mother and Rach. Ade wasn't backing down, which Janet struggled with, but she was doing her best and getting stronger every day. Her and Rachel spent many a night having a glass of wine and chatting about anything and everything. Janet wouldn't admit this to anyone, but sometimes she saw Rachel in a different way. She didn't know how it started.. one day she was watching Rach at work, as she was tracking something or another on the computer, and she noticed a strand of hair trailing down Rachel's cheek, she noticed the soft, inviting skin, the full lips, the chocolate brown eyes, the forehead furrowed in concentration.. Janet had given herself a mental shakedown. She was just feeling lonely, and her best friend had been so kind and supportive despite all of her own stuff she had going on, and Janet was just feeling lonely.. wasn't she?

As for Rachel, well.. she was doing the best she could. She had returned to work a couple of days after it had all kicked off, and burying herself in work during the day, and into her friendship in the evenings. She loved having Janet stay with her. Although she was still seeing Sean, it was just uncomfortable being around him at the moment. He was such a buffoon. Such a joker. And right now, Rachel didn't need that. What she usually found endearing, now bothered her more than words could say, so she was trying to keep a bit of distance between them. She still hadn't told anyone about what she'd done about Dom, although she'd been close to telling Janet a couple of times. She felt she could tell her anything, but something kept holding her back. It was hard, as she was usually so open with Janet, especially recently - it was as if them both being vulnerable at the same time had given them an even foundation to work from. It was so nice having Janet around. It got even better after the first week, during which Rachel had tried to keep tidy and orderly in the flat until Janet told her it was scaring her how 'weird' Rachel was being. So now it was back to normal, for Rachel's standards at least. In the mornings she would walk through the flat with her trousers and bra on, searching for her top that was in the ironing basket, grabbing some toast on her way through, not bothering to put it on a plate. And after a month or so, her untidy ways seemed to rub off on Janet a bit. She wasn't always so consciencious around the flat or with herself at the moment, though of course as soon as they both went to work it was precision and carefulness which counted, which they maintained.

xxx

'Right Rach, I'm heading off, I can't be late for the girls again, I'm taking them out to the Chinese restaurant for tea. I've cleared it with Gill, so I'll meet you back at the flat later.'

It had been a particularly draining day, with a particularly difficult murder case that was seeming impossible to solve, and Gill was not a happy bunny.

'Bloody hell, Godzilla was feeling a bit generous wasn't she?! No worries Jan. I'm gonna stay here anyway and try and get Jonson to speak. He has to crack eventually. I'll catch ya later.'

Janet left, while Rachel went out for a cigarette, racking her brains for something to get her suspect to start talking. As she walked back into the office, she could hear Gill giving intrructions from the doorway to her office.

'Mitch, I don't understand how many times I have to say that we need all the CCTV of Friday night, that includes the bloody Tesco's CCTV. I don't CARE if you've been busy getting everything else, go and retrieve what we need. Now. Kevin, I know this is probably past your grasp of reality, and you'd much prefer colouring in pictures with crayons, but would you PLEASE focus on leaning on forensics to find out what exactly the ligatures were caused by?' As she spotted Rachel, she twisted her head 'Rachel, in here please.'

Rachel rolled her eyes at the others and walked into the office. Before Gill had even closed the door she had started talking; 'Boss, I know we are running out of time before we have to release Jonson, but there is only so much we can do. He is refusing to talk. We just have to find the key, and I know it is coming to me, I know there is something we are missing here, but I WILL find it, we will crack this bastard.'

'Well, you're not working hard enough. I don't know if it's all the trouble in your private life that is playing on your mind, and that would be fine, but if it's in the case, you shouldn't be here. I won't have staff of mine not working to their potential. It's not good enough. And so help me God, if I have to force leave on you, I bloody will. I'm not putting up with this Bailey, regardless of the circumstances.'

Rachel kept her tears at bay, the injustice of it all threatening to open the carefully placed armour that she had kept around herself for weeks. 'I'm sorry you feel that way, boss. I can assure you I am best kept on this case, and I will do whatever it takes to nail Jonson for this.'

'Well, I should hope so. We need the best team we could possibly have. Prove to me you can do this.' Gill's face suddenly became warmer, more sympathetic. 'I know you're going through hell, really I do. I just.. I have all the top bosses breathing down my neck and I need able people around me. Now.. that's not the reason I called you in. I'm sorry I shouted, I shouldn't have taken it out on you. The thing I wanted to tell you is there has been a possible sighting of Dominic in Plymouth. Obviously the police are chasing it up, but I just wanted you to be aware.' She gave Rachel a quick squeeze on the arm, and dismissed her from the office.

Rachel walked out in a daze. Without even checking with Gill, she picked up her coat and bag, and walked out to her car, not really seeing clearly. She got in and had another cigarette before driving endlessly around the area. After a couple of hours of aimless driving she went home, noticed Janet's car parked already and headed inside. Janet was in a good mood and had a bottle of wine open.

'You alright, Rach? I'll pour you a wine.' Janet smiled at her. 'The kids were great! Taisie is getting on much better at school thankfully, and Elise had me in stitches telling me about her day. It was so nice to just have some time to really talk. It's weird that I seem to be spending more time with them now, proper meaningful time, than I did when we lived together. You should have heard what...' Janet was full of tales of the kids, and while Rachel would usually listen and laugh and be interested, tonight she just wasn't listening. She couldn't take it in.

'Sorry Jan. Just.. helluva couple hours. Gill.. was her usual bitchy self, had a go at me, threatened to put me on involuntary leave, before telling me Dom has been spotted in bloody Plymouth.' Rachel flopped down on the sofa and tried to relax. 'And Godzilla will be joyful tomorrow, I left early without clearing it with her, so.. I'll be in the shit again. I just can't deal with it.'

'Oh God, Rach. I'm so sorry. It must be so hard hearing about Dominic. What are the police doing?'

'Just chasing it up. All they can do really isn't it. They'll catch up with him eventually. I just..' She stopped herself just in time. She had been about to tell Janet again about what had really happened. But then she thought to herself.. would it really be so bad if Janet knew? It's eating me alive, and Janet is my best friend. She knows everything else.

'You just what?' Ha, Janet wasn't stupid, she could pick up on the smallest thing. No surprise there. 'Look, you've been keeping something back, and you have every right to, but if it's getting too much, you can talk to me. You know that.' She looked at her friend eagerly, wanting her to feel a bit better, but not knowing how to help. She also couldn't help noticing how attractive Rach was. Even in her angst, she just looked... lovely. Janet shook herself off, and tried focusing again on Rachel's obvious needs.

'Okay... okay. Jan.. you're right. I.. there's.. no. I mean, yes. There is something I haven't said. But I can't not tell you any longer, it's eating at me...' Rachel trailed off, trying to gather her thoughts. The nausea coming back again was distracting, but she knew she had to tell Janet, if she couldn't tell her best friend who could she tell? 'Okay.. do me a favour mate, and just keep quiet until I get it all out, because I'm finding it really difficult. Please bear with me.' Rachel looked over at her friend who was nodding intently, leaning forward, a hand on Rachel's knee. She took a deep breath. 'Okay. Right.. well. Shit! Um.. yeah, okay. So.. you know.. you know the day I found out what Dom did, when Dom did a runner?' Janet nodded slowly, encouraging her to continue. 'Okay. Well, er- okay. So, I lied. I lied about Dom.' She could see Janet's eyes widen, her hand moving away from Rachel's knee, her mouth about to open to say something. 'Please Janet. You said you wouldn't interrupt. Please.' Janet nodded stiffly. 'I.. okay. So you know Ali rang me, and when I met her she told me about Dom. You know that bit. And you know I went to the train station and ran after Dom to try and catch him. Right?' Janet nodded again, her eyes questioning. 'Well.. I caught up with him. Oh God.' The nausea was getting worse by the second. Her hands were shaking again and Janet was staring, her lips slightly parted, eyes wide. Rachel pushed forward. 'I caught him, yes. And.. When I caught him, honestly I was going to arrest him. I was. I grabbed him, I started reading his rights. But.. I couldn't. Please understand me. I couldn't do it. So...' She was definitely going to be sick in a minute. It wasn't a matter of if.. it was now a matter of when. 'So.. I er- I told him to run. I hit him a couple of times, and I told him to run. I told him they'd catch up with him eventually, but I let him go. And.. I'm going to be out on my arse if the bosses ever find out. I'm so scared Jan.' Rachel finally fell fully silent, waiting for her best friends response. She didn't have to wait long.

'Are you joking? Is this some stupid joke? Rachel! For God sake, why do you tell me this stuff? Why? First the PNC, then when you spilt your guts to Savage, and now this! Really? I know you probably couldn't nick Dom emotionally, but don't drag me down with all this! It's not fair! You know what position you are putting me in with this. But you do it time and time again. I'm sick of it!' Janet looked furious, and Rachel didn't know how to placate her. She hadn't expected Janet to react like this, clearly she didn't know Janet as well as she thought she did.

'Janet, please! You told me to tell you! I've kept it to myself for weeks, and it's making me ill. I thought you would understand, I thought you would care!'

'I DO understand, I DO care, but you keep dragging me into your messes, and one day I'm going to lose my job because of YOU! I can't do this Rachel. I can't be your mum. I can't make everything better.' Janet stood up at this point, facing her friend. Rachel, feeling anxious, stood up too, tears starting to streak down her cheeks, as much as she tried to resist it.

'Well, I'm sorry! I'm sorry if I thought you would be there for me, like I would be there for you if you were ever in this situation. Clearly I misjudged the situation. It's now obvious you don't care at all.'

This was too much for Janet. She wasn't thinking straight, filled with fire in her stomach. To be told she didn't CARE about Rachel was just too much. Ridiculous. But still, she couldn't explain why she suddenly marched towards Rachel, backing her against the wall and kissing her with as much force as she could muster. For a moment it was blissful, she was giving into desires that for the most part she had even managed to hide for herself. But then she realized what she was doing. She realized that she had her hand twisted in Rachel's hair, the other hand wound around her neck, pulling her in tight. Janet knew she had to step away, and she started to.. but then she felt Rachel kissing back, with as much intensity as Janet had. She felt Rachel's hands framed around her face, holding her tight, their lips moving together in a frenzy. She could feel Rachel gasping for little breaths, her tears now leaving tracks down Janet's cheeks as they became closer than they could ever have imagined... suddenly, without warning, they heard the front door open, and they jumped guiltily apart. There was only one other person who had a key to Rachel's flat.. Sean.