Hell of a Wake Up Call

"Release the Saints, gentlemen."

A pounding stabbed in his head. It seemed to drill through the very core of his brain from between his eyes, despite them staying closed. His head was heavy as were his eyelids, noticing only after he attempted to lift both. His blue eyes scanned the room, brows furrowed in their usual expression of anger. Beside him a soft grunt came from Shaundi's lips. Turning his head to look at her, his wrists tugged against the metal and rope restricting them both. It jingled violently against his still weakened strength. Her head was still lowered, her arms like his, tied against the back of chair, wrists handcuffed. Someone had taken her jacket, leaving her in her tank top.

The same pressure controlled Shaundi's mind, throbbing relentlessly. The words echoed through her ears in vibrations, not understood. She knew hangovers, this had to be multiplied by hundreds. Pushing through the discomfort she opened her eyes. Two men stepped forward. One moved behind the chair with keys and knife in hand; the other came to stand in front of her, his hand moving under her chin to grip her jaw and neck. He forcefully lifted her face, flashing a bright, LED light into her eyes. They adjusted to it soon enough, though she had to squint due to the intensifying pain.

"She's awake, sir."

Swhffttt! The ropes around her bare arms were cut down by the blade behind her, dropping to the floor with a thud. She stared up at man who examined her, her upper lip rising in an annoyed scowl, yanking her face away from his fingers. The metal constraints around her wrists fell loose soon after. The back man moved behind the Boss to repeat the process, slicing the ropes off first.

Shaundi's hand swung up and into the light holder's neck, delivering a strike to his Adam's apple. He dropped the flashlight, choking instantly. Her nails pierced into his skin, pushing him to the ground. The second man now dropped his keys, coming toward her with the knife.

"In coming!" The Boss twisted his chair-locked body to the side, tripping the man's path enough to make him stumble. Shaundi turned, kicking the man's face. Her high heel jammed into his jaw, cracking it apart and ripping a dripping gash from cheek to mouth. He screamed and dropped the blade, falling in front of the Boss' chair and promptly getting his jaw completely broken off by a Saints brand sneaker. Shaundi picked up the keys, kneeling behind the Boss to unlock the cuffs. He stood, rubbing his wrists as he stepped forward. The choking man was still attempting to catch his breath, the sides of his neck leaking drops of blood from Shaundi's nail marks. The Boss' leg pounded into his chest in a heavy stomp. A loud crck! ripped through the air as his ribcage collapsed.

Clap, clap, clap.

Both Saints looked into the darkness of the large room. The Boss' lieutenant came to stand beside him now, tugging subtly on the back of her glimmering pants. A large man stepped forward, his merino sheep suit pinned by diamond cuffs. He stood at least 6 feet 7 inches and was clearly on some kind of major steroid. A foreign accent and slight lisp came through as he spoke. "Good morning, dear Saints."

"Who the fuck are you?" The Boss' head tilted slightly, both Shaundi and him holding their usual, menacing expressions.

"Arnold Cheraldeto. Your new partner, of course. Please, relax. I wish you both no harm."

"Then why the hell did we wake up drugged and tied up?" Shaundi asked pointing back at the chairs. Ropes and handcuffs rested by them on the floor. One was knocked over.

The man sneered, holding his hands out. "Would you have talked to me otherwise?"

"No, and we sure as hell won't be talking to you now." The Boss stepped forward, his fingers tightening into fists. A sea of clicks spread throughout the front side of the room. He stopped, now noticing the silhouettes in the darkness.

"That wouldn't be very wise, Saint. You see, my men here aren't quite as fond of your little street gang as I am." He lifted his hand up to signal something. Rows of dim lights turned on across the room, exposing the 20 plus men surrounding the front of the oval shaped walls. All pointed loaded guns in their direction. Shaundi glanced back. She had a clear view of downtown, the city's lights at night shining brightly through wall length set of windows that made up the back of the room. She turned again, seeing the door behind two of the men. They blocked the only exit. Cheraldeto stepped behind a large desk, sitting on main seat and mentioning the two across him. "Please, sit."

The Boss didn't move, his eyes scanned the men around him. Shaundi leaned her weight on one foot, her hips tilting in her casual way of standing. Seeing their lack of movement, Cheraldeto's fingers swept forward, instructing his men as he lit a cigar. Two stepped out of the line, their fingers on set on triggers. Moving behind the Saints, they hesitated for a minute, silently deciding who should take who. One barrel pressed against each back.

"Move it, Saint. Take a seat."

The Boss reluctantly stepped forward to one of the chairs. Shaundi followed, taking her time. Her hips swayed with each step. The guard reacted by grabbing her shoulder and shoving her toward the free chair. She caught herself, turning to face him. Jumping back a few inches, his gun came up and pointed at her face. He was visibly shaken, hands trembling as he held the weapon.

"Touch me again and I'll rip your eyes out with my bare hands." She turned, pulling the chair out with her heel before taking a seat. Cheraldeto laughed heartily, clapping in amusement before gesturing for his men to get back in place. They followed orders.

"And that's what I'm here for, Mr. Saint!"

The Boss lifted a brow, glancing at Shaundi. "For Shaundi to rip your eyes out? That could be arranged." Shaundi agreed with a lean of her head.
The man's deep laugh rang through the room again, his cheerful smile showing both top and bottom set of teeth as he met the leader's eyes. "No, no. For your breath taking lieutenant. I'm here to take Shaundi."

Shaundi's expression deepened. "...What?"

"You see, Saints. I've been noticing your brand for some time now. I've seen you take over the world of, how do you call it...marketing? Yes. You got the drinks, the shirts, the little cute toys," He laughed, bringing the cigar to his lips. His fingers snapped. One of his men leaned forward, lighting the cigar tip. He puffed air through; it exhaled as he spoke again. "But you see my biggest entertainment comes from the show I Want to Sleep with Shaun,-"

"It's wanna..." Her arms, like the Boss', were marked with bright red bruises from the ropes. They rested against her chair's arm rests, fingernails tapping against them.

"Yes, yes. Your show, they play it here, they play it there. They play it day, they play it night. Oh, excuse me. Behike?" Opening the box of cigars in front of him, he turned it to face the only two wearing purple in the room.

Shaundi ignored the question, looking elsewhere and crossing one leg over the other. The Boss stared down at the cigars for a second before his eyes lifted to Cheraldeto's. They stared at each other in silence before the Boss spoke.

"I don't know if it's because of your accent or that retarded ass lisp, but I didn't understand a fucking word you just said."

Cheraldeto threw his head back, howling his most outrageous laugh yet-then slammed the cigar case closed. The loud BAM echoed against the walls. It didn't phase either. He stared at them, now completely serious with a hint of deep malice...then broke out into a grin again.
"The show, it is well known all over the world. Mr. Saint, please, I do not want things to be difficult for us. I bring you and your lieutenant here to make business," Reaching in his suit's inner pocket he brings out a black pen and a handkerchief. His huge shoulders lean forward, towering over the desk as he writes. Leaning back up, he folds the handkerchief and slides it forward across the polished wood. Smirking at them, he holds his hands out to speak. "This is my offer to you. A generous one. An impossible one to refuse."

Neither boss or lieutenant were amused. Their backs rested against the chairs. Shaundi's foot swung gently up and down. The Boss slouched in his seat slightly in boredom.

Cheraldeto began to speak once again. "Please indulge me, partners. Consider my offer," His hand hinted toward the paper, the other brought the cigar to his lips. He inhaled the thick smoke in large puffs. "That is for the show. All production control and all money coming from it."
The Boss' middle finger reached for the handkerchief's edge, flipping it open (and leaving his finger up for a few moments, facing Cheraldeto).

2,300,000

The Boss and Shaundi turned to each other, seriously at first. Both grinned, bursting into chuckles. The Boss leaned forward, his elbows resting against his knees. "This is a fucking joke, we get more than this in a day from Shaundi's residuals alone."

"Exactly my point, Mr. Saint. The show, it is good, but has the potential to be prachtig! Under my rule, it would be more violence, more drugs, more sex. A little more Shaundi, a little less clothes, yes?" Shaundi's eyes narrowed, leaning to her left. He continued, grinning. "It is an option to order my men into your city and simply take everything you've worked so hard on. But as I said. I am a business man. If you are not pleased with the offer, I encourage you to make your own." The pen slid across the desk, getting caught by the Boss' hand.

It took a second before "Mr. Saint" crossed off the initial number, jotting something down underneath it. Leaning back, he showed the handkerchief to Shaundi first for approval. She read it, raising her brow and nodding. Both turned to face Cheraldeto, the handkerchief getting tossed in his direction followed soon after by the pen.

It landed inches in front of his hand, crumbled up. He flattened it, reading the second set of writing.

FUCK OFF

The Boss began to rise. The shuffle of guns aiming filled the room again, all guards ready to fire.

"Sit down, Saints."

"Fuck this, we were done with you long ago."

"Sit. Down." Cheraldeto signaled forward. The guns lifted higher. Shaundi looked at the Boss. He rubbed his eyes, grunting at the waste of his time. They sat down again. Cheraldeto's stare darkened. His cigar slid between his lips, the tip burning a bright flame with each inhale.

"You may be done with me, but I am not done with you. I'll have to ask the lady to take a second look at my first offer." He threw the napkin forward to Shaundi's chest. It fell to her thighs.

Shaundi stared down at the napkin, clenching her jaw as she faced its owner. Lifting it up, she threw back on his desk with enough force to knock over a pencil holder; pens and papers messed up across the surface. Her perfectly trimmed left brow lifted. "I'd like to extend you a counter-offer to suck my dick."

"I assure you, my dear, my counter-offer is not so charitable. It involves you, a lot of guns, and a lot of your friends dying."

The Boss inclined forward a couple of inches, expressing his total approval of her answer. "Our only offer involves going, to fuck, and then yourself. Stop wasting our time and open the door so we can go back to dealing with important shit. I'm starving."

The Boss stood, his chair knocking over behind him. Shaundi followed him as he made his way to the door. Cheraldeto's men tightened in front of it, their bullets ready to fire. An enormous pressure wrapped around Shaundi's already bruised arm. Cheraldeto forced her back, turning her around to face him by twisting her arm. The Boss stepped back, not getting very far before feeling two gun barrels press against each side of his neck. His shoulders straightened, rigorous, blue eyes locked forward.

Turning back to the male Saint, Cheraldeto smirked. "I can see why you keep her yours, Saint" His eyes moved back to Shaundi, devouring her legs, abs and chest until their eyes met again. "I bet she is a nice...fit."

"You know what I bet is a nice fit?" Shaundi looked up. Her shining platforms made her stand only inches shorter than he. She got near his face, her straight, white teeth clenched together. They showed as her upper lip rose in revulsion. "My foot in your ass."

Cheraldeto's face turned a deep crimson. His eyes bulged out, nostrils flaring. His jaw began to quiver in anger, fingers tightening around her arm. Twisting it more, he shook his head. "Someone should have taught you some manners by now, woman." His free arm lifted, palm opened as it swung down toward her face.

The Boss' arms swung back, smacking the barrels pointed at him. They interwined, their handlers squeezing their triggers as their rifles crossed paths, shooting each other in the neck and face. Shaundi's hand reached back, swiping the knife previously used to cut their binding ropes from the back of her waistline, where she had initially stashed it after unlocking his handcuffs. The strength of her arm contradicted with Cheraldeto's, her forearm clashing against his incoming slap. Grunting, her hand slammed against the opposite side of his neck. The blade sliced through his skin easily, burying into the side of his throat. Blood spurted violently. She stared into his eyes as he dropped to the floor; they bulged for a different reason now. His grip held her in place still, now more desparately as he clinged to the last hints of life. Twisting her wrist, the blade rotated to a horizontal position allowing her to slit through the entirety of his neck. Under her his body fell lip and to the floor, his eyes rolling back as he took his last breath. She jerked her arm out of his clasp.

By the time Shaundi looked up a single shooter remained. His back was pressed against the wall, stumbling from side to side. It wasn't long before the Boss' fist crashed into his cheek. A string of bright red liquid gushed from his mouth. He hung in there for a second...then face planted into the floor to join the rest of his comrades. They all bled profusely. The desk had been shattered, walls stained with blood, bullet holes spread throughout and most of the men had their skulls crushed open.

"I gotta admit, I love when you do that." Shaundi's heels ticked against the floor, coming closer. He turned to face her, eyebrows rising at the sight. Behind her, the massive structure of a human laid in a pool of his own blood. He handed her one of the thrown around guns. She took it, blood covered a part of her arm and shoulder. The handkerchief previously used now rested on the ground by her feet. She leaned down and picked it up, attempting to wipe off some of the blood with it. The Boss moved toward Cheraldeto's body, his foot pushing his head to the side. His neck responded by squirting out more blood. Standing to move beside him, Shaundi tossed the handkerchief back down. It landed on Cheraldeto's chest.

"Alright, let's get the hell out of here before more of those fuckers-" A loud thump came from the door as someone tried to push it from behind. Two bodies in front of it prevented a full opening. By the amount of back up heard behind the door, the blockage wouldn't last long. "Well, shit."

THUMP! The door spread open wider this time, the bodies tilted forward to the floor. Shaundi lifted her rifle. "These bastards have got to be all over the fucking building, tell me you have a plan!"

"Uh...Sorta! Yeah!"

THUMP! The door was one yank away from being fully opened now.

"Whaddaya thinkin', Boss?"

Bullets bursts through the air. She stumbled a few steps away from the Boss, the sudden noise catching her by surprise. The glass of the windows shattered as his bullets punched through it. The air of the city ventilated the room, blowing both of their hair back. It was colder due to the significant altitude.

"We jump!" Wrapping the Krukov's strap around his shoulder, he threw it around his back.

"...What?!"

"JUMP! As far as you can!" The Boss charged forward toward the downtown lights.

THUMPCRCK! The door bursts open. Shaundi threw the strap of her Krukov across her shoulder, sprinting to catch up to her boss. He propelled forward, his leg extending to its maximum length. She used the hook of her heel against the window's edge to lunge her thin figure further out. Bullets rang out behind them, attempting to catch them on the way out. They dove into the city; the cars beneath seemed miniature at this height.

Gravity caused the Boss to fall faster than Shaundi due to his weight. Gathering his thoughts, he tilted himself forward into a dive. It gave him more speed and shot him forward against the next building. His body expanded back to slow his fall. Reaching for his rifle, he aimed and shot down in a zigzag line through the row of windows preceding him and Shaundi. His body made contact with the skyscraper just under fifty floors above ground level. His limbs pounded against the surface, skin scraping and cutting as he tumbled down. He grunted, furiously attempting to catch a grip somewhere. Finally, his torso crashed against one of the shot out edges of the facility. He released a loud grunt. His head and chest pulsated inside out from the impact of the fall. No time.

His body shot to the side, using only one of his hands to grope the ledge. The other extended in time to catch Shaundi. She flew into him, her fingers tugging at his clothes frantically as her body continued to slide down.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" His body dropped fully, putting all strain on his left arm. The lowering gave his muscular arm a chance to wrap around Shaundi's slim waist. She responded by wrapping her arms around his neck and shoulders. "Got ya!" His brows furrowed, teeth held tightly together as he attempted to hold on; his bicep and triceps flexing under the Saints t-shirt he wore. His fingertips dug into the edge with enough force that it began to rip his nails from their beds. "Whoa shit! Maybe not!"

Despite his best efforts, the blood coming from some fingers began to make his grip slip, and eventually they were both falling again. Shaundi reached behind his back, gripping onto the weapon with both hands. His arm tightened around her as she let go of his neck, holding her against him as they both dropped through the next set of floors. She shoved the rifle into the next open level, both barrel and handle cautching against an edge. It anchored them to the side of the building with a violent jolt. The Boss winced as the strap cut into his chest, which he now hung by.
"Good thinking..." He groaned.

"Hold still I'm gettin' up there." Tossing her rifle through the window first, her hands pressed against his shoulders. With one arm around her waist, his free hand wrapped around the back of her thigh, using his strength to lift her up as much as he could in this position. Her arms extended up, getting her hands over the edge. Her chest (now glistening with sweat) hovered inches in front of his face. The small breaths and grunts escaping her lips didn't help.

"The view from up here is incredible! Take your time," The tip of her heel dug into his hip, driving into his skin for assistance getting up; he winched. "Deserved! Okay!"

Pulling herself up enough, Shaundi's knee lifted over the edge and she rolled onto the main floor. The Boss followed as her weight lifted off him. His hand twisted back and gripped the Krukov's strap, pulling his entire weight up by it. The other hand gripped the ledge; the veins in his biceps protruding as he pulled himself up. By the time Shaundi turned to him he had pulled himself up and laid next to her. Their legs hung over the edge, latex purple tights with shining boots and jeans with purple and white sneakers dangling from one of the city's highest structures.

The Boss stood first, picking up his weapon with one hand and helping Shaundi up with the other. "You okay?"

"I'm fine. You look like hell..." She responded, settling into the balance of her high heels. His shirt was torn, cuts and bruises decorated him all over. Her brows furrowed as she studied his injuries, bringing the rifle up to rest against her shoulder. She also had cuts down her arms, the star tattoo on her hand bled from a scrape that ran through it.

"I'm good. Let's go."

A small group of business men and women in the room stared at the bloody Saints, who absentmindedly walked past them to the hallway's elevator.

"Ugh, fuck!"

He turned to face her. "What?"

"The new Genki episode was tonight. We missed it."

"Ah fuck."